Well, shit.
That did not go as planned.
I watched Ezra bound up his front steps, his blond hair glowing from the porch light as he hurried to the door. He didn’t even look back before he disappeared inside.
Dumbfounded, I sat in his driveway for several long seconds, replaying the last ten minutes in my mind on an endless, humiliating loop.
The first time I ever tried to kiss someone, my lips were met with nothing but air.
I’d thought he was going to do it there for a second before he bolted. When his forehead pressed to mine, I closed my eyes, waiting for it.
My lips still tingled with anticipation for the kiss that never came.
Lightly touching my fingers to my mouth, I held in a sob as I put the car in reverse and backed away. My entire body stung from Ezra’s rejection. Not that I could blame him. In his mind, I was a desperate girl on the rebound. Even worse, a cheater.
By the time I got back to Gavin’s, most of the partygoers had filtered out. Only a few pairs of making out couples littered the living room, along with a shit ton of cups. Someone had spilled a bowl of chips on the carpet, but at least I didn’t see any vomit. That was a win.
Gavin was nowhere in sight, but I knew where to find him.
I clomped down the basement stairs, my flip-flops slapping against the bottoms of my feet, until I made it off the bottom step. Gavin’s large form was on the sectional couch. The only light filling the room was from some sports channel on the big screen TV.
Slumping down onto the cushion next to him, I silently willed away the ugly cry threatening to come to the surface.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked, hitting the mute button and turning his hazel eyes my way.
He knew me so well. Even in the silent darkness he could sense my dismal mood.
“I tried to kiss Ezra Johnson,” I blurted out.
Brushing his dark hair off his forehead, he chuckled. “Of course you did. Wait, what do you mean ‘tried?’”
“He turned me down. Hard. And wait, what do you mean ‘of course you did?’”
“You think I don’t know you’ve got a major lady-boner for the kid? Come on, Kayla. Give me some credit.”
Gasping, I pushed at his shoulder. “It’s one of the only secrets I’ve ever kept from you. I’ve worked really hard at keeping it to myself.”
Gavin gave me a look.
“You tutor him in math,” he deadpanned. “Honey, you’re not that good at math.”
Laughing, I gave him another shove.
“I got good at it. I had to because I needed a neutral setting where I wouldn’t scare him off.” I frowned. “Although, I definitely did that tonight. He’ll probably never talk to me again, and that’ll be really awkward in the fall when we see each other.”
What I didn’t say was that I didn’t understand Ezra. Not after what I’d found out. It should’ve been simple—he liked me, I liked him. Kissing was supposed to ensue.
But he thought I had a boyfriend. I kept forgetting that minor detail.
“It’s my fault,” Gavin said quietly. I started to shake my head, but he continued. “I’ve been so selfish with you. I got more out of this friendship than you did.”
“That’s not true. Not even a little bit.” Tears filled my eyes.
“I held you back. I know that. I’ll never be able to repay you for what you’ve done.” There was so much gratefulness in his voice. “But I won’t be in the way much longer.”
That only made me cry harder. “What the hell, Gavin? Way to rub salt in the wound.”
“Sorry.” Chuckling at my uncharacteristic emotional breakdown, he picked up the box of tissues from the coffee table.
I took one and mopped at my face. “Why does everything have to be so complicated? You’re moving away. Ezra might hate me now. Everything is changing.”
His giant arm engulfed my shoulders as he drew me in for a hug. “It’s supposed to change.”
“I know, but that doesn’t make it easier.”
“Our lives are just beginning, Kayla. I’m excited for what’s coming next, and you should be too. It’s gonna be awesome, I can feel it.”
“I hope you’re right.” I looked up at him. “I hope things are great for you, Gavin.”
“You too. Just promise me one thing.”
“What’s that?”
“Stop straightening your hair.” He flicked at my locks. “It’s giving you split ends.”
I laughed. “You’re as bad as John.”
“I’m just kidding. You’re beautiful no matter what.” He was quiet for several seconds, then said, “I want you to tell Ezra.”
“Tell him what?”
“About me. It’s only complicated because he doesn’t know the truth. And the way you looked at him tonight… it was different than before. I’ve never seen you like that.”
I didn’t want to tell Gavin about the sketchbook, because it was personal to Ezra. So I just agreed, “Things are different.”
He gave my shoulder a squeeze. “Tell him. I have a feeling he’ll be cool about it.”
“I think so too,” I said, perking up.
Keeping Gavin’s secret had never been a burden, but being able to confide in Ezra would take a weight off my shoulders. It was the best solution to my problem. He’d finally understand that my heart didn’t belong to anyone else—only him.
Drying the last of my tears, I switched gears on the conversation with Gavin. “So when do you leave for California?”
“Ten days.” Excitement practically oozed from him. He couldn’t wait to get away from here.
“I’ll miss you like crazy. You know that, right?”
“Of course,” he said cockily, puffing out his chest.
I rolled my eyes. “Good luck finding a new best friend who’ll put up with that attitude.”
His amusement faded. “I’ll miss you, too. No matter what happens, we’ll always be friends,” he reassured me seriously. Then his tone turned playful. “Even when you and Ezra get married and ride off into the sunset without me.”
I let out cynical snort. “Right. Well, when I get married you better be prepared to be my best man.”
Gavin gave me a wistful smile before resting his cheek on the top of my head. “And you’ll always be my best lady.”