Chapter 19

 

It rained all night long, and in the morning Rico drove through a soggy landscape under a still gloomy and gray sky. He parked in front of the Dunbar house and didn't even get the chance to knock before Sammy opened the door for him. "Morning, Rico," she said.

"Morning, Sammy. I guess your dad is cooking breakfast," Rico said as he smelled bacon frying.

"No. It's Gloria's aunt. She's making a man breakfast," Sammy said and Rico felt like he had been punched in the gut.

What the hell was going on? Why would Stella be here so early? Following Sammy as she ran ahead, he practically stumbled into the kitchen where he found Stella standing by the stove and wishing him a cheery good morning.

She was wearing an apron Rico had seen hanging in the pantry. Under it, she had on the same clothes she wore last night at the barbeque.

The smell of bacon frying filled the kitchen. Instead of stirring his appetite, it made Rico sick. He had to get out of there.

"I forgot something," he said to Sammy and left the way he came, heading for the car, planning to drive away.

He didn't stop until he felt Mitch grab his arm. "You didn't hear me?" Mitch said while Rico only stared at him. No, he hadn't heard him. He didn't want to hear anything he had to say.

Now he wrenched his arm free of Mitch's grip. "What do you want?"

"Where are you going?"

"Leaving," Rico said curtly.

"Wait two minutes. Is this because of Stella?" Mitch had the nerve to ask.

"Fuck you, Mitch. Go to hell!" Rico snapped at him. He wanted to scream the words, but he couldn't catch his breath.

Mitch still told him, "Keep it down. She had a fight with Lara, so she went for a walk to cool off and got caught in the rain. She ended up here all wet, and..."

Rico cut him off. "Oh my God!" he didn't want to hear any more.

"What? Was I supposed to kick her out into the downpour?" Mitch asked.

"Yes," Rico said unreasonably. "Lara could have come to pick up her skanky ass."

"I already told you they had a fight. I couldn't drive her because Sammy was asleep. And why the hell am I explaining myself to you?" Mitch said getting almost as mad as Rico.

"Right. It's none of my business what you do. Now I'm getting out of here so I'm not cockblocking you. Do whatever the fuck you want!" With that Rico walked away and didn't look back.

 

Rico didn't know how he got through the rest of his day. It was all a big, painful blur with his chest hurting constantly, not being able to take one easy breath. He put in a shift at the café, but he wasn't sure if he did any kind of decent work.

Afterward, his night was sleepless and he got up feeling heavy, like his body didn't want to move. Next day, he went in for his breakfast shift at the café and barely managed to mumble good morning to people who greeted him.

When his grandmother came in, she told him, "Work in the back, sweetheart. You're scaring the customers." She said it kindly and patted his shoulder, but Rico still felt semi-useless. And if she decided to send him to the Dunbar house, he wasn't sure what he was going to say.

He didn't want to set eyes on Mitch, but he did commit to helping out over there. That was something he was doing for his grandmother, and he had already skipped out on it yesterday.

For now he just had to focus on not screwing up right here at the café. At least working in the back was easier for him. He didn't have to force a smile for the sake of the customers.

On his break, he decided to go sit on one of the crates behind the café. Stepping outside, he saw that Sam and Wyatt were already there.

Rico covered his eyes and tried to retreat. "I didn't see anything."

"That's because we weren't doing anything," Sam told him. He was such a good boy.

"We were, but we're done," Wyatt said. He was not a good boy.

"Don't make it sound like that," Sam complained.

"Right. I'm never done with you," Wyatt said and moved as if to nibble on his ear. Sam dodged him though.

"Save it for your honeymoon," Rico told them. Seeing how happy they were together made him feel like crying. They deserved to be happy. He was just a terrible person.

"What's with you?" Wyatt asked. Rico thought he was asking about his gloomy mood, but Wyatt was questioning him about his facial hair. "Are you growing a beard too?"

"I just haven't shaved," Rico said, but Wyatt just kept on teasing him.

"Maybe you want to look more rugged for your man," he said while Sam elbowed him.

"If you mean Mitch, I don't know that he's into rugged. He might just be into boobs and all the rest of it. Lara's sister stayed the night at his place," Rico confessed and felt like he might throw up.

Sinking down against the wall, he ended up hunched over with Sam crouching next to him.

"That's just not right," Wyatt said as Sam put his arm around Rico. "Want me to beat him up for you?" he offered.

"As if you could," Rico told him.

"I totally could," Wyatt claimed.

Sam looked at both of them like he couldn't believe what either one of them was saying. "Are we doing 'my boyfriend can beat up your boyfriend'?"

"Except yours can't," Rico informed him.

"Can too," Wyatt said, but Sam focused on something else.

"But you're not denying that Mitch is your boyfriend?"

Rico didn't realize he had done that. "What? He isn't. That much should be obvious."

"If you think you really have something, you shouldn't give up," Sam told him.

"I'm not going to be that guy," Rico told him.

"What guy?" Wyatt asked.

"Let me paint you a picture," Rico said. "This guy, Jordy, from my dorm sees some guy hitting on his ex. So Jordy actually says to me, 'Hold my beer.' I take the beer. I see he didn't even take a sip, so I start drinking it. He sees what I'm doing and now the fool wants to fight me for drinking his beer."

"I'm not sure what you're trying to say," Sam said.

"You want to go out for some beers?" Wyatt guessed.

"No. If you lose your head over a thing that was never meant to be, some guy is going to drink your beer," Rico said, but they both shook their heads at his beer wisdom.

"I can't believe you're ready to give up like this. Why was I ever jealous of you?" Wyatt asked and Rico perked up.

"Jealous?" Rico raised an eyebrow at him. "That sounds interesting. Want to fill me in, Sam?"

"You didn't tell Rico I was jealous of him?" Wyatt realized with surprise.

Sam sighed. "That's because I knew he would never let you live it down."

Rico grinned evilly at Wyatt. "He was looking out for you." Then he grinned even more evilly. "But that's all over with now. Welcome to your hell."

Wyatt gave Rico a pained look then turned to Sam. "Sam, you're so good, why are you friends with such an evil person?"

Rico answered him. "Because he can't resist me," he threw his arm over Sam's shoulders to prove to Wyatt that Sam was right to keep his mouth shut.

"Oh, God, it's starting," Wyatt said then he pulled Sam away from him. He snagged Sam around the waist and held onto him possessively. "I'm gonna go. I have work to do. Thank you for trying to protect me and my big mouth. Sorry I ruined it," Wyatt said to Sam then kissed him sweetly and left.

Rico waved to him then grinned at Sam. "You already know me so well."

"I see that cheered you up. You ready to go fight for your man?" Sam challenged him. Rico slumped down again, but Sam wouldn't let up. "Go have it out with Mitch. Let him tell you what's going on."

"Is that what Wyatt did when he got into a jealous snit?" Rico asked him.

"He did, but I did what you're doing and bitched to you about it," Sam said.

"I remember that. It did turn out OK for you guys, but I don't think I'll be that lucky. I just can't crawl over there," Rico told him.

"Don't crawl. Kick down the door and demand an explanation," Sam urged him.

"Listen to you getting all aggressive. Oh man, I wish I could. But I don't have the right," Rico said and started to head inside. "I better get back to work and try not to break any dishes."

 

At the end of his shift, his grandmother came over. She had printed up some orders for plants and wanted him to take them over to Mitch when he went to the house. Until then Rico wasn't sure if he was going. Now he wondered if he could get out of it, maybe offer to put in another shift at the café.

Noticing his indecision, his grandmother said to him, "Come on now. What's with this face? Be a good grandson and tell me what's bothering you."

"Don't worry about me. I'll go over and do some work. I'll be fine," he told her. He couldn't afford to keep wallowing in his misery. He just had to face reality and get it through his head that Mitch never saw him as anything more than a way to pass the time.

All the more reason to give him up now. Maybe he should send a thank you basket to Lara's sister for making him see the light. Maybe not.

 

After almost turning back several times, Rico dragged himself over to the Dunbar house. To his surprise, he found Wyatt's car parked in front and all the kids loaded into the back seat along with the dogs. Mitch was there, seeing them off, and Rico felt a stab of pain as soon as he saw him.

While Mitch and Wyatt talked, Rico went over to say hi to Sammy and the boys. Talking over each other, they told him they were going on a dog picnic.

"Have fun guys," Rico told them.

After a quick nod at Rico, Mitch went around to the other side to give Sammy a kiss. That's when Wyatt stepped over to Rico and told him, "This was your grandmother's idea. Now get in there, have it out and clear the air."

As Wyatt's car pulled out of the driveway, Rico's stomach twisted into knots even worse than before. He didn't want to have it out with Mitch. What good would it do?

"I wasn't sure you were coming over today," Mitch told him and the sound of his deep voice cut him up inside. For a while he just stood there until Mitch had to prompt him. "Are you coming in?"

Going inside, Rico stayed silent like he had to conserve his strength merely for breathing. He told himself that maybe nothing happened between Mitch and Stella. Maybe he had no reason to be suffering like this.

But that night at the barbeque, Mitch made it clear that he didn't want anyone to know what they had been doing, and the next morning Stella was making herself at home in this house.

Thinking of it, Rico wanted to bolt. Then he remembered the printouts his grandmother had given him. He looked at the papers in his hand and wondered if it was just busywork. When she sent him here, she also arranged for Wyatt to get Sammy out of the way at the same time.

He handed the papers to Mitch anyway. "My grandmother said to give you these."

Taking the printouts, Mitch looked them over and nodded, so maybe they weren't useless. "We can get the yard ready to plant these as soon as they arrive. We need to pull up a few things and we can dig some holes too."

"Whatever," Rico said. Listening to Mitch being so calm and businesslike was pissing him off and making him feel sick inside. Mitch didn't feel anything for him. Rico was in agony and he only cared about digging up the yard.

"Enrico, if you..."

"Let's just get to work," Rico snapped. Right now the last thing he wanted was to talk to him.

The kind of work they were doing was just right for how he was feeling. They were tearing out bushes and digging. Grabbing a pickaxe, Rico was ready to go to it. Before he could swing it, Mitch grabbed his arm.

"Put on some gloves," Mitch ordered him. Rico was about to tell him where he could stick it, when Mitch shoved a pair of work gloves in his hand and added a threat. "Put them on or I'll do it for you."

Rico almost told him to go right ahead but then realized that would be a terrible idea. If Mitch actually did something like that, Rico was bound to get turned on. That thought made him even more furious. Mitch could get to him so easily, but Rico was nothing to him.

Pulling on the work gloves, Rico took up the pickaxe again and started swinging it. He pulled up the roots then grabbed the base of the plant and yanked it out of the ground. Maybe he could do that to his feelings for Mitch, just rip them out by the roots till there was nothing left.

He kept working with that idea driving him. The destruction felt good, and he didn't spare himself. But once again Mitch interfered. This time he grabbed his shoulder. As soon as he felt his touch, Rico jerked away from him.

"You need to slow down. You're going to hurt yourself," Mitch told him in a stern voice, but Rico had no intention of slowing down.

"And you would care?" Rico challenged him.

"I'm responsible for you," Mitch said like he was trying to piss him off.

"That's real touching. Now leave me the hell alone," Rico told him and got ready to get back to ripping up the yard.

"For God's sake, she slept on the couch, not in my bed," Mitch yelled suddenly. He looked like he was fed up with him, and Rico was too.

"You want a medal for that?" he asked. "Why the hell was she cooking you bacon, Mitch?"

"She insisted on making breakfast," Mitch said forcing each word out. He was losing patience, but Rico didn't care.

"And you have no control over who cooks in your kitchen?"

"Apparently not. You make yourself at home over here and do whatever the fuck you want," Mitch snapped at him.

"So it's the same thing? That's what you're saying. Now tell me again how nothing happened," Rico said while glaring at him.

"I don't need to explain myself to you," Mitch claimed.

"Because I'm nothing to you, right?" Rico didn't wait for an answer. Instead, he asked Mitch, "Aren't you sick of it yet?"

"What?" Mitch asked narrowing his eyes and clenching his jaw.

"Of being a fucking coward!" Rico yelled and then went back to digging up roots and trying to channel every wretched, agonizing emotion inside him into the next strike of the pickaxe against the ground.

 

They worked in silence for a long time. Rico didn't even know how long, but then they heard a car honking and Mitch said, "That must be Wyatt bringing back Sammy." It was a warning to Rico to act right, but he didn't need it.

Rico straightened and leaned on the shovel he had been using to dig holes. He stretched feeling the ache of working non-stop and prepared himself to be cheerful to Sammy when he saw her.

She ran around the corner of the house and stared at what they had been doing disapprovingly. "You made it messy, Rico," she scolded him and he couldn't help but smile.

"It will look nice when we start planting some flowers. Grandma ordered some nice plants," he told her as she came over to peer at the holes they dug.

"Not vegetables, right?" she said and fixed him with her inquisitive, blue eyes.

"Just flowers," he assured her. He wondered where Mitch was then he saw him coming out the kitchen door with a water bottle for each of them.

If Sammy wasn't there, Rico would have refused the water Mitch offered him no matter how thirsty he was, but now he took it and even thanked him.

 

Later on, when he was heading out, Mitch walked him to his car. Rico wondered why then he got his answer when Mitch looked down at the ground, sighed then spoke up. "Look, I know I've sent you some mixed messages but..."

Rico couldn't let him finish if all he was going to say was that it was all a mistake, and Mitch now knew what he wanted and it wasn't him. That's why he cut him off. "If you're looking for someone to let you off the hook, that's not me," he told Mitch curtly.

Dropping the mild, almost apologetic tone he used before, Mitch now matched Rico's combative attitude. "I don't need to be let off the hook," he stated sharply. "I'm not in the wrong here."

"Are you saying I am?" Rico already knew the answer. Mitch was telling him that he was, that he had no rights here. That meant Mitch could do whatever he damn well wanted without giving him a single thought. "Fuck you, Mitch."

"Real mature."

"I don't need to be any more mature than I feel like being. I'm not trying to impress you." Rico turned toward the car, swung open the car door then stopped. His voice got tight as he said, "This thing we were doing never made any sense anyway."

He got in behind the wheel and slammed the car door. He glared at Mitch. Then without breaking eye contact, he turned the ignition and put the car in gear. He backed out of the driveway like that until it curved. The whole time Mitch stood there and angrily watched him drive away.