I flicked my head back over my shoulder to the man who had called my name.
A gigantic boulder settled in my stomach as I watched the Chief of Police of Jasper Bay saunter toward me and Ryker on the sidewalk.
I squeezed Ryker’s hand that was suddenly against my palm and exhaled a deep breath. My limbs trembled as Chief Garrison reached us and held us out his hand.
“Good afternoon, Faith,” he said, and then nodded toward Ryker. “Knight. Heard you patched in.”
Ryker released the Chief’s hand and pulled me closer with his other one, wrapping his arm around my waist and holding me tightly next to him. He nodded once. “I did.”
Garrison studied both of us for a moment before he lifted his sunglasses, hooking them to the front of his beige, button down shirt.
“Good luck with that,” he finally said to Ryker before setting his full attention on me. “I’ve been looking for you.”
My heart pounded against my ribcage as I waited for him to tell me about Cain. Maybe arrest me for shooting him. My arrest flashed across my eyes as blood drained from my face. Handcuffed and stuffed into the back of a squad car as Ryker was forced to watch and bail me out of jail. Awesome.
“It’s about your mom.”
My head jerked to his eyes. Ryker’s hand tightened against my hip and I felt every single one of his fingertips searing heat directly into my body. I leaned into him for support.
“What about her?” I choked out.
Garrison’s hands fell from his slight belly down to his sides. His piercing hazel eyes softened around the edges as he pulled in a deep breath. “She was found just outside of town today.”
I inhaled a deep breath only to find I couldn’t exhale it. I choked on it, unsure of what to say or do.
“What do you mean?” I finally asked, looking to Ryker for help with something—anything—I didn’t know what I needed. Only that I needed him to say something. Do something. But all I saw was a small tick in his jaw as he kept his focus tied to the Chief.
“I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, Faith.” The Chief’s voice was softer when he spoke again. He took a small step forward, reaching out to touch me, but Ryker yanked me closer to him. His eyes flickered to Ryker’s for a brief second before landing back on mine. I’m sure they were as big as dinner plates. “Your mom’s body was found in an old abandoned farmhouse this morning. And I’m sorry to be the one to tell you, but she’s gone. The coroner’s initial reports claim an overdose.”
Gone. As in dead. My knees gave out. Ryker lifted me up and held on to me with both arms so I was standing on my feet, but he was doing all the work.
“We need you to come identify her body.”
“No,” I breathed out, shaking my head.
“Faith.” I turned my head only to find Ryker’s lips right at my temple as he whispered my name against my skin. “You can do this.”
I shook my head again, staring at the Chief. “You know who she is. You can identify her and take care of her.”
Ryker called my name again. The Chief opened his mouth to say something, but I stopped both of them. She was dead, but I had already said my good-byes a week ago. No one would mourn her death—least of all, me.
I straightened my shoulders and regained my own footing. Shifting away from Ryker’s clutch, I stood directly in front of the Chief. “We all know what my mother was and wasn’t,” I told him. He blinked once before nodding. “But there will be no service for her. There’s no one who would want to say good-bye to her.”
I stood there, on the sidewalk in the middle of the day, with Ryker’s warmth surrounding me, but finding my own strength inside of me. I knew… I knew last night when I left her with the men and with Cain bleeding out that this was a possibility. A better daughter might have mourned her or been saddened by what she had lost.
I wasn’t that daughter.
My mom wasn’t the kind of mother whose death brought on those emotions. As far as I was concerned, the world had lost one less drug-addict and was now a better place without her.
I sure as hell was.
“Take me home,” I said, looking at Ryker. My chin jutted out in a way that dared him to argue with me.
He didn’t. He simply opened the door to his truck and ushered me inside. Once I was seated in the bench seat, the Chief stepped forward.
“One more thing,” he said, this time focused only on Ryker. His stance was more defensive, less kind than it had been moments before. “Heard you guys are helping the Sporelli’s out now.”
Ryker said nothing. He stood like a sentry at his post and arched a brow, waiting for Garrison to continue.
“You should know that Travis Larson was doing the same thing and we all know how that ended up.”
I swallowed my gasp this time, waiting to see if anything else would be said. Larson had been Olivia’s boyfriend and father to her lost baby. The last time she’d seen him he’d been gunned down by a group of the Sporelli family, and in the process, Liv had been shot as well. Her wounds were healed now, from where two bullets had grazed her waist and shoulder, but I also knew she still carried the guilt of Travis’s death in some way.
“What’s your point?” Ryker asked.
The Chief shrugged, unfolded his sunglasses, and placed them back over his eyes, shielding his eyes from Ryker’s harsh glare that rivaled that of the sun’s rays. “You boys might want to be careful.”
“Is that all?”
He nodded and took a step away from the truck. “Have a good day.”
Ryker closed the door to my side of the truck and ignored Garrison as he walked around the front. I looked straight ahead until Ryker climbed in and started the engine.
He turned to me as he moved the shifter into reverse.
“Don’t ask if I’m okay,” I said. I held up a hand, hushing him before he could argue. “Every time we get in this truck, you ask if I’m okay. I’m fine. We knew it was going to happen and right now, I don’t feel a thing. Maybe I will, maybe I won’t. But right now, I want to go home.”
A thick, palpable silence swirled in the space between us. After several long, agonizing seconds, Ryker opened his mouth to say something.
“I think-”
“I’m fine,” I said, cutting him off. “I just want to go home.”
“Okay, then.” He nodded, and his lips curved up slightly as he leaned over and brushed a hand through my hair, tugging the ends. His eyes softened and I could tell he wanted to say more, but I enjoyed the moment, soaking up the quiet between us. “Home it is.”
My friends knew how to not only throw one hell of a Welcome-To-Your-New-Home party, but they knew how to throw a kickass party together quickly.
We had only been gone for a couple short hours, but by the time Ryker and I got back to the house, Jules and Olivia had snack foods lined up all over the place. They had two different barbeques ready to grill in the backyard and the fire pit ready for a campfire later. Drinks were in buckets and kegs were both inside and outside the house. And the house was full of old ladies, mostly Switch’s old lady, Marie, cooking up more side dishes than I’d ever seen in my entire life.
The house smelled incredible, even if it still didn’t feel like mine. But I knew they were all working hard at making it feel that way. I pushed down the awkward feeling and let myself enjoy the fact that not only had Olivia and Jules planned a party in no time at all, but they’d called men from the club and their women in to help.
And they had all come.
Not only that, but someone had already unpacked all the things we’d bought from the store earlier that day.
The shopping trip had drained my bank account, what little of it there was, but I didn’t care. For the first time in a long time, I’d been able to enjoy an afternoon out with friends without the weight of Cain or my mother pressing down on my shoulders.
It had been freeing.
Which was partly why I didn’t want Ryker worrying about me or my thoughts about my mom. I didn’t know if the overdose was intentional or not. I didn’t want to know.
I wanted to walk through the house that had new towels hung up in the bathrooms, pretty—but not too girly—soap containers on the counters, and smiled when I saw my new blender and toaster on the kitchen counters and some new, cheap, but cool looking paintings I’d bought at a local store of views of the north shore in Minnesota, already hanging on the walls in the living room and entryway.
My stuff.
In my home.
I kicked off my shoes when I walked in the door, grabbed Ryker’s hand, and for the next few hours until the sun set, I laughed and mingled with the biker club that was quickly reminding me that my family was larger than the one I’d been born into.
I smiled.
I drank.
I kissed Ryker freely, whenever I felt like it, for no other reason than because I could.
And that was exactly what I was doing when Olivia plopped her butt down on the picnic table next to me. Without any thought to the fact that Ryker’s hand were cupping my cheeks and our lips and tongues were mingled together, I felt a hard, pointy elbow jam into my waist.
“Ouch,” I cried, yanking back from Ryker. “What the heck was that for?”
Ryker simply laughed, ran his hand down my hair, and pressed his lips to my forehead.
Olivia smirked. “Check that out.”
I looked away from her to where she pointed at the tree line where Jaden had his hand grasped around Jules’ biceps. From the distance, I took in Jaden’s tense expression as he barked harshly at Jules. Meanwhile, Jules kept her eyes on Jaden. Her lips pressed together before she ripped her arm out of his grasp, snapped something equally angrily back, and then stomped across the grassy area.
“Crap,” I muttered. And then my eyes widened as I watched Jaden watch her walk away. Except his angry face vanished as his eyes drifted to Jules’ butt and his angry expression flickered to confusion before he spun around and clasped his hands behind his neck.
“That boy is going to have to figure out what to do soon,” Liv said softly next to me.
“About Sophie?”
“That… and the way that as much as he hates Jules, he also can’t take his eyes off of her.” She took a pull from her beer as we watched Jaden face the crowd again. His eyes almost immediately went to Jules who had bent to scoop up Sophie and carry her back to us. Jaden watched the whole thing before he bypassed the partying crowd in the backyard and went inside, ignoring everyone who tried to talk to him. The scowl never left his face.
“He’ll figure it out,” Ryker said next to me. His arms were braced on the sides of my hips, but his head was turned to where Jaden disappeared. “Men are stupid sometimes. It’ll take him awhile, but he loved Scratch way too much to not be there for Sophie. It’s just bringing back a bunch of painful shit for him.”
I nodded but said nothing. Coming back to this club had brought painful shit back to Liv’s life and I wasn’t an exception, either. But tonight wasn’t the night where I was going to waste time dwelling on it.
“Hey, sweetie,” Liv said as Jules reached us. Ryker pressed another kiss to my temple before he excused himself to go talk to Daemon closer to the fire. Liv’s arm went around Jules. “How are you?”
Jules lifted and dropped one shoulder. Her hand smoothed down the back of Sophie’s sleepy head. “We’ll figure it out.”
“You get a job?” I asked. Jules had moved back to Jasper Bay for the summer when I had called her, telling her Olivia had been shot and Black Death wouldn’t let me go see her. I figured Liv could have used a friend. Jules had come back immediately, but I hadn’t expected her to stay. I also hadn’t expected her to show up with a two-year-old in tow, either.
She shook her head. “No, I’ve got a few interviews coming up but most of the districts have already hired for the year. I might be able to do some substitute teaching to get my foot in the door at some of the high schools around the area, though.”
I took a sip of my drink while Liv and Jules talked about high school and the memories. Their soft laughter danced through the air, and with every giggle and every memory shared, I felt the stress—the darkness that had pressed down on me for far too long—lift into the dark night air and drift away.
“I need a new job,” I said, abruptly cutting Jules off from the story of the time we’d all toilet-papered our principal’s house one night. He was pissed and Jules figured he still wasn’t over it considering when she’d gone in to apply for an open English Teaching position, he’d reminded her of that very night.
“You should go work at Gunner’s.”
I frowned at Liv. “The tattoo shop?”
Liv shrugged. “Yeah, I’m sure he’d hire you to do my old job. It was simple bookkeeping work and you could do it. Daemon wants me working at the garage, instead.”
With that, her eyes went all hazy looking and seemingly on their own accord, drifted over to where Daemon and Ryker stood by the fire with a bunch of their brothers surrounding them. As if Liv’s eyes were magnets to his, Daemon caught her glassy-eyed look, lifted his beer, and flashed a wink in her direction.
“You two are gross,” I said. “But yeah, I’d be willing to work for Gunner. It couldn’t be too hard.”
“Until a bomb is thrown through the window,” Liv snorted.
I nodded. “That would be a problem.” I nudged her shoulder. “Stop staring at your man.”
She grinned. “Can’t help it, he’s freaking hot.”
The three of us girls laughed. It was easy and light laughter, and I never wanted the night to end.
I opened my mouth to ask Jules about Jaden when Daemon took a few steps from the fire and the group of men. He halted when he stood in the middle of the yard.
“Listen up,” he called. Everyone instantly stilled. Daemon stood in the middle of the group, his shoulders back, looking like the man Liv always wanted him to be. From next to me, she let out a breathy sigh.
Once Daemon knew he had everyone’s attention, from adults and kids alike, he raised his beer bottle in the air. “We haven’t had an easy few months.” The crowd rumbled with agreement while Daemon kept talking. “But we joined this life and the club to be able to live free and live hard and nothing is gonna stop us from doin’ that under my watch.”
As the group of biker men and their old ladies cheered, he turned to face Liv directly. His beer tipped in her direction and his grin went wide and happy. I nudged Liv in the shoulder when I saw her smile matched his.
“We’re gonna have some tough months comin’ up. But what all this shit has taught me is that in the dark times, even among the death and the fighting, we have got to take the time to treasure what’s ours.” Liv gasped as Daemon’s hand went to the front of his jeans pocket. My own body tingled with anticipation. “Get your ass over here, woman.”
Daemon kept his eyes focused on Liv as I pushed her off the table. She stumbled slightly and muttered, “You have to be shitting me,” but she went into the middle of the yard where Daemon waited for her.
“We’ve fucked around long enough, right?” he asked as soon as she reached him.
“I’m not sure our sex life is everyone’s business.”
Daemon laughed and pulled his hand out of his pocket. “Not what I meant, woman. But this—,” he paused and held up what I knew was a ring. A diamond ring. Liv’s jaw dropped as Daemon’s smile stretched from ear to ear. “This is what I want from you. We’ve fucked up and it took too damn long to get you back in my bed and my house. And now that you’re here, I want to make sure you never want to leave again. So what do you say, princess… you ready to be my queen?”
The crowd of men hooted and hollered while the women clapped and cheered. Above the noise that rang in my ears, I couldn’t hear Liv’s response, but her nod gave her answer.
Daemon slid the ring onto Liv’s ring finger and pulled her into the kiss that only increased the hollers from the men. Except this time they were coupled with shouts of telling them to get a room.
My fingers dug into the wooden edge of the picnic table as the sight in front of me grew cloudy and blurry through the stinging of my tears.
I was happy for her. Happy for my friend who had loved Daemon more than anyone else in her entire life. Much like I’d felt about Ryker. The words Daemon spoke rang true in my own ears.
We had fucked up long enough… hadn’t we wasted enough time?
As if Ryker knew I was thinking the question, I caught him staring at me in the distance. My lips lifted into a small smile as he caught me watching him and his feet began bringing him toward me.