CHAPTER 5
I ELBOWED THE FIRST GUARD IN HIS STOMACH. THE SECOND Guard tried to force me into a corner, but my spin kick sent her flying into a gurney. The third and final Guard took a swing at me, and I’m not sure what happened, but I do know I kind of lost it.
A deep and terrible rage flowed through me. Time sped up incredibly fast. I caught the Guard’s hand and twisted his arm backwards, spinning him around. Planting my foot in his back, I knocked him into a table. The first Guard came at me again. He dodged my kick, but I spun around before he could anticipate my next move and my foot connected with his chin. The impact sent him staggering back.
The female half rushed me. I jumped the table of medical gloves and cotton swabs with startling grace. There was a second when I acknowledged that I shouldn’t have been able to do that. Not clear a five-foot table with one jump. Especially when I hadn’t even looked behind me, but then the heel of my shoe slammed into the cart, crashing it into the female’s chest. The three Guards struggled on the floor in various degrees of pain.
The white walls of the med office spun as I turned around, facing the cowering pure.
“I still don’t have a choice?”
He edged along the wall, his face as white as his coat, hands held out in front of him as if that could stop me. I took a step toward him out of maliciousness. Not like I’d actually hit a pure… again. He bolted for the door yelling, “Guards! Guards!”
Several of the halfs looked shocked, like they too couldn’t believe what I’d just done. Two of them looked like they wanted to join the melee.
“You don’t have to do this,” I said earnestly. “They can’t make you if you don’t—”
My words were cut off by the first Guard. Recovering, he jumped to his feet. “Miss Andros, you have made a very unwise decision. No one would have hurt you.”
I wheeled around. They weren’t going to come at me one at a time now. Some of the rage ebbed as I stumbled backward. Time stopped moving so fast. The three of them rushed me at once. I managed to knock one of the Guards aside, but another grabbed hold of my arm. I would have had him too, I swear, but the swarm of Guards entering the room distracted me.
So did the two halfs blocking their entrance, putting up a decent fight. I almost smiled, but a heartbeat later, I was pinned to the cold tile. Two of the male Guards held my arms down, and the female half literally sat on top of me. I bucked, trying to free myself.
“Stop.” She grabbed the sides of my head and forced it back. Blood trickled from her nose. “Stop fighting us. No one wants to hurt you.”
I could hear the scuffle by the door. “You’re hurting me now,” I gasped out. “You’re busting my spleen.”
The commotion caused by the fighting quickly ceased, and for a moment, all I could hear was the sound of my heartbeat slamming against my ribs painfully. “Okay. I’m done.”
She glared down at me. “We’ll decide when you’re done.”
“No. I will decide when you are done. And you are done with her,” came a new
voice—one that was both as cold and as hard as it was oddly musical.
The weight on my chest suddenly vanished, along with the Guard. She flew across the med room, slamming into one of the many carts lining the walls. I rolled onto my knees, drawing in air.
Seth took one step into the room, eyes simmering with anger. “You. Help her up now.”
“But… we have our orders. She refused to comply.” said the Guard.
“You must not have paid close attention. The Minister gave orders for all halfs to be searched, but not his stepdaughter. I doubt he will be pleased to know you three disobeyed him.” Seth’s gaze fell over me. “Why have you not helped her up yet?”
The Guard who had spoken darted forward and gently placed me on my feet.
“Apologize to her. All of you.”
Surprised, I looked at Seth. He was being serious. He actually wanted them to apologize for doing their jobs. And the way he looked, well, he looked like he wanted to physically make them sorry. There was something unstable in his eyes. “Seth, that’s not—”
“Be quiet, Alex. I want to hear them apologize.”
My brows shot up. “Excuse—”
“I’m sorry, Miss Andros,” the male Guard interrupted, as pale as a daimon. “I beg your pardon.”
Seth looked pointedly at the other Guards. The female Guard limped forward, apologizing profusely. When I nodded, they filed out of the room, leaving Seth and me alone for a few moments.
“You didn’t have to make them apologize, Seth. They were just doing their jobs. You didn’t—”
He stood directly in front of me, moving so fast I hadn’t even registered it. He caught the edge of my chin with the tips of his fingers, looking me over. My cheek felt a little tender, but I doubted it would bruise. “A ‘thank you’ would be nice. I did stop them, you know.”
I shifted uncomfortably. “Thanks.”
Seth arched a brow as he tipped my head back. “You could also sound like you mean it.”
“I do mean it, but you embarrassed them.”
He dropped my chin, seeming pleased that I didn’t screw up my face. “You beat the Guards up when they were just doing their jobs. I guess we’re even.”
Dammit. Seth had a point. I sighed. “Did… Lucian really order them not to search me?”
“Yes, but apparently he wasn’t clear enough.”
“But what about the other halfs? They shouldn’t have to go through that.” Instead of answering, he reached out and straightened the collar of my shirt. It must have come down during my fight, exposing the tags covering my neck. “Seth, what about them?”
Dropping his hand, he shrugged. “I don’t know. I only have enough room in my head to be concerned about myself and you.”
I snickered. “I’m surprised you have any room to think about anyone but yourself.”
The smug grin was back. “Me too. I don’t think I like it, actually.” He dropped his arm over my shoulders and steered me toward the exit, pass the halfs waiting outside and the cold looks of anger from the pures.
Aiden ended practice early that evening. We didn’t speak much, but I could tell he had heard about what’d happened earlier. The only bright spot of the evening was when I ended up getting to eat dinner with Caleb. The news had already traveled to him and probably the rest of the Covenant.
“How much trouble did you get in?” Caleb asked.
I shrugged and dipped a fry into a glob of mayo. “None, actually. Lucian had ordered them not to search me.”
Caleb cringed as I stuck the mayo-covered fry in my mouth. “You’ve been touched by the gods. I swear.”
“Touched in more ways than one,” I cracked. “Where’s Olivia?”
“Can you dip your fries in something normal, like ketchup?”
I swirled my fry in the mayo gleefully. “And where’s Olivia?”
Caleb leaned the chair back on two legs, sighing. “She’s mad at me about yesterday. We got into an argument this morning.”
“Oh. You guys fighting?”
“I guess so. It’s stupid. Anyway, any news about the daimon?”
I told him what Seth had said about more half-bloods being attacked and turned. Caleb had the same reaction as I did: disbelief and anger. Sometimes I really, truly believed that the Councils would run better if half-bloods had control. We seemed to have better critical thinking skills and more common sense.
After a few moments, Caleb spoke. “You know, I think what you did was pretty awesome.”
I shrugged, thinking about how embarrassed the Guards had seemed. “Thanks. But it doesn’t feel pretty awesome now.”
Caleb raised his brows. “Well, it’s got everyone talking and thinking. None of us want to go through with this. We think it was brave.”
“It wasn’t brave. Stupid maybe, but not brave.”
“No,” he insisted. “It was brave.”
“Caleb, you know the pures will go crazy if we start really, really pushing them. One half refusing a strip search is one thing, but dozens? That’s treason to them. You know what they do when you’re suspected of treason.”
The determined look gave his blue eyes an unfamiliar edge. “Like I said, I think things have to change around here.”
I leaned forward. “Caleb, don’t get in trouble.”
“Why are you arguing with me about this, Alex? You stood up to them today, but you sound like you don’t think any of us should. Why? Only you’re allowed to, and the rest of us should just go along with whatever they want?”
“No. That’s not what I’m saying at all. It’s just that this is serious, Caleb. It’s not about sneaking into rooms or leaving the Island. People could get expelled or worse.”
“You didn’t.”
“Yeah, well… I’m different. And—and I’m not saying that to be like I’m super cool, either. The only reason I’m not in trouble is because Lucian stepped in—why, I don’t know. But you guys will get in trouble.”
Incredulous, he threw up his hands, shaking his head. “You’re being way too… ”
“Way too what?”
Caleb frowned. “I don’t know, too rational about this or something.”
For a moment I did nothing but stare at him, and then I busted out laughing. “Do you know you’re the only person to accuse me of being too rational?”
A smile broke out across his face, reminding me of the younger, more carefree Caleb—the Caleb who didn’t get excited about taking a stance against the pure-blooded Council. “Well, I guess there’s a first time for everything.”
We grinned at each other, but then my smile faded. “Caleb, you’ve changed.”
His smile disappeared. “What do you mean?”
“I don’t know. You’re just different now.” I didn’t think he was really going to respond, especially when he stood up.
He walked around the table to sit next to me, and his lips pursed for a thoughtful moment. “I am different.”
“I know,” I whispered.
A brief smile appeared. “You know, I keep thinking about when we were… in that cabin and I couldn’t do anything to help you. I don’t know what I’d thought it would be like to face a daimon. I guess I really had no idea.” A muscle along his jaw ticked as he rubbed his fingers over a scuff mark on the table. “All I keep thinking is there had to be something I could’ve done to make them stop hurting you. I should’ve fought through the pain or something.”
“Caleb—no.” I grabbed his cool hands. “There was nothing you could do. And that whole, messed-up situation was my fault.”
He faced me, lips twisting into a cynical smile. “I just never felt more… powerless in my life. I don’t want to feel that way again.”
“You’re not powerless. You never were.” I scooted over and wrapped my arms around his stiff shoulders.
Caleb responded a little awkwardly at first, but then he rested his chin atop my head. We stayed like that for a little while. “You have mayo in your hair,” he murmured.
Giggling, I pulled back. “Where?”
He pointed. “You’re such a messy eater.”
After I got the mayo out of my hair, he studied me. “What? Do I have more mayo in my hair?”
“No.” He glanced around the empty cafeteria. “How are things between … you and Aiden?”
I dropped the napkin. Usually Caleb sensed Aiden wasn’t something I wanted to talk about. “I don’t know. Everything is the same, I guess.”
He rested his chin on my shoulder. The edges of his soft hair tickled my cheek. “Was he mad about the Guard thing?”
“He didn’t say anything about it, but I’d go with a yes.”
“Have you guys, you know, done—?”
“No!” I jerked back, hitting his arm lightly.
Caleb shot me a knowing look.
“Nothing can happen between us, you know that. So stop looking at me like that.”
“Like not being allowed has ever stopped you before, Alex. Just… just be careful. I’m not going to lecture you—”
“Good.”
He flashed a grin. “But if anyone finds out about what almost happened between you two…”
“I know.” I glowered at the rest of my fries. “It’s nothing to worry about, all right?”
The topic thankfully switched to less serious subjects. Way too soon, we had to head back to our dorms, and I was feeling a little bit better about things by the time I showered. But I still worried about Caleb, feared that the events in Gatlinburg had damaged him.
After I’d changed I was hit again by that weird tingly sensation. Heat crept over my skin right before the intense ache started in my belly. Really, I tried to ignore it. I even picked up my trig book, but I couldn’t focus. I turned on the television, but the force of whatever affected me made it nearly impossible to think about anything other than not having a boyfriend. Maybe this was the way my body was telling me I needed to find someone—someone who was actually available and wasn’t a pure-blood.
When it finally did ease off, I fell into a restless sleep that lasted only hours before I shot straight up in bed, heart racing. I scanned the dark bedroom, trying desperately to rid the image of Daniel’s face from my mind, his touch from my memories.
I rolled over and looked at the window. A second passed before my brain processed the dark shadow behind the blinds. My heart leapt into my throat. Jerking up, I threw the covers off and crept over to the window. The shadow was still there, sending shivers over me. Was it Seth trying to peep into my window?
If so, I was going to beat him over the head.
Or it could be the daimon—since they hadn’t caught it yet. Hell, if it was, it wasn’t going to sneak into my room.
I drew the blinds up and jumped back. A pale face—clearly not Seth’s—stared back at me. In the pale light of the moon, I almost thought it was a freaking daimon.
But it was a Sentinel. I think the icy blonde was named Sandra. Still, what was she doing staring into my bedroom window? Something about that creeped me out majorly. Without further ado, I unlocked the window and pushed it open. “Is everything okay?”
Sandra’s eyes dropped to the tags on my bare arms before she dragged them back to my face. “I thought I heard screaming coming from this room.”
I flushed as I realized I must’ve been dream-screaming. “I’m sorry. Everything’s fine.”
“Make sure this window is locked.” She smiled. “Good night.”
Nodding, I closed the window and threw the lock. My cheeks still felt bright red as I climbed back into bed and pulled the covers over my head. Although my childish screams had brought a Sentinel and not a daimon to my bedroom, the creeped-out feeling lingered all night.
I stumbled through the day, feeling out of it and sick. Not throwing up sick, but nervous sick. I dozed off beside Deacon in class. He woke me up before the teacher spotted me sleeping. My hands trembled when I picked up my soda at lunch, which earned me a slew of concerned questions from Caleb and Olivia.
Maybe I was coming down with something. Or maybe it was the nightmares I’d had for the last two nights. I really didn’t know, but all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed and sleep.
In Gutter Fighting, it was hard for me to follow the movements of my sparring partner. Luke took it easy on me, only knocking me to the floor a couple of times. And my day wasn’t anywhere near over.
Practice with Aiden immediately followed, and I sucked at that, too.
I feinted to the left, but my movements felt jerky and too slow. Aiden’s leg came around viciously, striking me in the calf. The impact knocked me forward, face-first into the mats. Dropping very real blades, I caught myself awkwardly. All my weight landed on my wrists and I let out a sharp gasp.
“Alex! Are you okay?” Aiden came to my side and reached down.
Ignoring the pain, I pushed myself up. “I’m fine.”
Aiden’s arm was still extended, as if he’d forgotten he had been reaching for me. He just stood there, staring at me. “What’s up with you today? You’re going to break your neck at this rate.”
Fire scorched my cheeks as I grabbed the blades off the mats. “I’m okay.”
I wanted to apologize for accusing him of being like other pures while we had a few moments of downtime, but the words “I’m sorry” just wouldn’t move past my lips, and then Aiden was falling back into an attack stance.
He flipped the blades over in his hands. “Again.”
I attacked. Aiden brought his blades down on mine, the sound of metal clashing rung through the training room. He pushed me back, jabbing one blade at my midsection. I caught his arm with my forearm, knocking his aim off.
“Good,” he said. “Keep moving. Never stay still.”
I darted under his arm, staying out of his range while I studied his moves. There was always something that gave away the move, the technique. Sometimes it was just a fine tremor of the muscle or eye movement, but it was always there.
Aiden jabbed, but it was a ploy. I saw it an instant before he dropped down, going for my legs with a low kick. I jumped out of way and then went for the kill shot. This game would have been over for an untrained half, being caught on the mats like that.
But Aiden wasn’t untrained and he was incredibly fast. He jumped to his feet in one swift movement, simultaneously tucking both blades into one hand.
I leapt, bringing the blades down. Aiden met me midflight, catching my arm. Within a second, he had my back pinned against him and two daggers pointed at my throat.
He bent his head down, his breath dancing over my cheek. “What did you do wrong?”
I felt his heart slamming against his chest. We were that close. “Um…?”
“You saw me moving the blades to one hand as a vulnerable move. You should have gone for the hand that held the blades. One clean swipe and you would have disarmed me.”
Mulling that over, I saw he was right. “Well, hell’s bells.”
He leaned his head down further, the longer strands of his hair brushing my cheek. Neither of us moved. I let my eyes fall shut as his warmth surrounded me. I think I could’ve fallen asleep standing against him. “Now you know.” He released me. “Go again.”
And I did. Again and again, we squared off. I blocked a series of his jabs and he blocked all of mine. After a few rounds, I was slick with cold sweat and exhausted. All I wanted to do was sit down.
Aiden rushed me, and I pushed him back. With distance between us, I launched to the right, fingers spasming around the hilt of the blade. Kick. Use a kick, I ordered myself. Aiden dodged my jab, but not my kick. He lost his grip on one of the blades, and it clattered to the mat. Surprise and pride flickered across his face before he charged me with one blade. I blocked his attack, arms trembling. He dropped down, moving into position to sweep my legs out from underneath me. I saw it coming a mile away.
I just didn’t—couldn’t will my legs to move fast enough.
Everything slowed down, ensuring that the lameness of what was about to occur would be perfectly captured. I jerked back toward the edge of the mat. His long leg swept around, catching both of my legs. I lost my grip on the blades and fell backward. A second later my head cracked off the floor.
I lay still, stunned and queasy.
Aiden’s face popped into my vision, but his features were a bit muddled. “Alex, are you okay?”
I blinked slowly. My head hurt so bad my teeth ached. “I… think so.”
“Can you sit up?”
Every part of me protested the movement, but I sat up. Aiden immediately checked the back of my head for damage with swift and gentle fingers. “That… was kind of lame of me.”
“It’s not a big deal. You were doing really well. You even disarmed me.” He sat back; his hands cupped my cheeks and tilted my head back. He smiled. “I don’t think there’s any permanent damage.”
I tried to smile, but failed. “I’m sorry.”
A frown creased his brow. “Alex, don’t apologize. It happens. You can’t always be the fastest—”
“I saw your move, Aiden. I had more than enough time to get out of the way.” I lowered my eyes. “I’m just so freaking tired.”
Aiden scooted forward, his knees pressing against my thigh. “Alex, look at me.” Sighing, I lifted my eyes. He smoothed my hair back with a little smile. “Are these practices too much?”
“No—”
“Alex, be honest with me. You’re training all the time. Is it too much?”
If he kept touching my hair I’d admit to anything. “It’s not too much, Aiden. Really, it’s not. I’m… just not getting a lot of sleep.”
He shifted so that he was right beside me, his other hand falling to my shoulder. I inhaled his unique scent of sea and burning leaves. With him this close, with one hand curving over my shoulder and the other continuingly smoothing back my hair, I was putty in his hands. I think he knew that.
“Why are you not sleeping, Alex?” he asked, voice low and soft.
The words just kind of spilled out of me. “I have nightmares—every night and all night.”
“Nightmares?” he repeated. He didn’t sound like he thought it was funny, but that he just didn’t understand.
I closed my eyes, taking a shallow breath. “You don’t know what it was like all those hours… in Gatlinburg, not able to really do anything. And all those tags—it felt like they were breaking off pieces of me. You don’t know what I would’ve done to make them stop—just stop.”
Aiden stiffened, his fingers curling around the nape of my neck. “You’re right, Alex. I don’t know, but I wish I did.”
“You don’t mean that,” I whispered.
“I do.” He went back to moving his fingers through my hair. “Then maybe I’d be able to help you somehow. Is that what you’re having nightmares about?”
“Sometimes they’re about Mom and other times it’s the other two—Eric and Daniel. They’re so vivid, you know? Like it’s happening again.” I pressed my lips together, stopping the ball of emotion from making it past my throat. Talking about that night, about what they’d done, curdled my stomach like sour milk. “So yeah, I don’t get much sleep.”
“How… how long has this been going on?”
I shrugged. “Since a week or so after everything happened.”
“Why haven’t you said anything? That’s too long for you to deal with this alone, Alex.”
“What was I supposed to say? It’s pretty damn childish to be having night terrors—”
“They’re not night terrors. It’s stress, Alex. What you’ve had to deal with…” He looked away, a muscle working in his jaw. “No wonder you’re having nightmares. She was a daimon, Alex, but she was also your mother.”
I pulled back, looking into his face. Concern etched across Aiden’s features, shifting his eyes to a thunderous gray. “I know.”
He shook his head. “And then you’ve been running nonstop. You haven’t had a moment to just… shut down. The daimon attack probably added to it. I don’t know why I didn’t think about that—why no one did. This is all too much. We have to—”
“Please don’t tell Marcus. Please.” I started to climb to my feet, but he kept me on the mat. “If he thinks something’s wrong with me, he’ll take me out of the Covenant.” And he would, too. If Marcus thought I was damaged, I’d be in servitude. Halfs didn’t go to counseling. They didn’t get posttraumatic stress. They dealt with things. They didn’t lose sleep and screw up in practice. “Oh, gods, Marcus is going to kick me out.”
Aiden caught my chin again. “That’s not what I was going to say. You worry too much, Agapi. I’m not going to say anything to anyone. Not a single word of this, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to forget.”
“What does that mean?”
He smiled, but it seemed off and a little sad. “Well, you need to get some rest, and you need time to just chill out. I don’t know. I’ll think of something.”
I covered his hand with mine. At once, he let go of my chin and threaded his fingers through mine. My little heart just got all kinds of happy. “What does Agapi mean?”
Aiden sucked in air. “What?”
“You’ve called me Agapi… a couple of times. It sounds beautiful.”
“Oh. I… I didn’t realize I had.” He pulled his hand free. “It’s the old language. It doesn’t really mean anything.”
That was kind of disappointing. Reluctantly, I climbed to my feet. I drew in a deep breath and watched Aiden stand. “I feel okay—”
The gym doors flew open, banging against the wall. Seth strode in like he owned the place. “What’s going on?”
I glared at him. “What does it look like?”
Aiden swiped the blades off the mats. “I really need to find a way to bar those doors.”
Seth shot Aiden a look. “I really wish you’d try.”
Aiden lowered his arms, his fingers inching over the hilt of the blades. “Don’t you have something you should be doing? I cannot believe your sole purpose of being here is to help Alex a few days a week and prowl the halls of the female dorm.”
“Actually, that is my sole purpose. Didn’t you know? I’m here—”
“Uh, is practice over, Aiden?” I cut in before the two choke-slammed one another.
“Yeah.” His eyes stayed on Seth.
I felt there was a good chance he might stab Seth. There was also a good possibility Seth might zap Aiden. “Okay. Thanks for the practice… and everything.”
Seth smirked and raised his brows at Aiden.
“No problem,” replied Aiden.
Groaning inwardly, I hurried over to my bag. On the way out, I grabbed a fistful of Seth’s shirt. “Come on.”
“What?” Seth protested. “I think Aiden wants to hang out with me.”
“Seth!”
“All right.” He spun around, straightening his shirt.
I didn’t look back. Once outside the building, I dared a glance at Seth. “Did you need something?”
He grinned. “Nope.”
“So, you busted up my training for no apparent reason? I call bullshit on that.”
Seth dropped his arm over my shoulder. “You can call whatever you want. Let’s go get something to eat. You can still do that, right? Or are you grounded from showing your face in the cafeteria?”
“I’m not supposed to be hanging out with friends.”
“Then I guess it’s a good thing that you and I aren’t really friends.”