When your anxiety goes away and having no anxiety gives you anxiety.
Lanie was on the road back to the winery when she took a call from Alyssa. There’d been some sort of electrical outage and the cottages were all out of power until morning.
Perfect.
“We’ve shifted people around in the big house,” Alyssa said. “Everyone has a bedroom for tonight, so no worries.”
Oh hell no. “Thanks, but I can get a hotel.”
“Not in Wildstone, you can’t,” Alyssa said. “No hotels. There’s a B&B, but why spend money? Plus, it’s haunted. We’ve got a room for you here in the big house—it’s all arranged. Second floor, right wing, last bedroom on the left.”
After the call, Lanie let out a breath and decided she needed a little time out, and that time out needed to come with a drink. Wildstone was incredibly picturesque and quaint but it wasn’t exactly hopping. She pulled into Whiskey River, the lone local bar and grill.
In the parking lot she quickly French-braided her still-damp hair and added lip gloss, her one point of pride being that she look as great as possible while feeling as low as possible. It made no sense to her, it really didn’t. She’d gone into this thing with Mark with no expectations. Absolutely none. There was nothing to take; nothing offered except a good time.
It’d all sounded good at the time. So why, then, back at the beach with Mark hadn’t she just expressed her understanding of the situation—because she did understand, more than he could know—and jump his bones?
Instead, she’d protected herself and walked away, hurt and surprised. Because while Mark wasn’t planning on giving anything, she already had. More than one piece of her heart already belonged to his children, his family.
And, if she was being honest, him as well.
Wow. She was really throwing herself a pity party here. Wanting to be over it, she entered Whiskey River and then stopped short at the sight of River sitting at a table by herself, a huge platter of wings in front of her.
River looked embarrassed. “I’d like to say that I’m here with a party of eight, but it’s just me and baby. You going to sit?”
Was she? She liked River, just another person she hadn’t intended to like at all. But even after all these weeks, River still held back with her. Not anyone else, just Lanie. It was one of those things, she knew. She’d never really made friends very easily. But now she was actually trying, though she had no idea why.
Because you’re tired of being a lone wolf . . .
So she sat. “I once ate an entire box of pizza rolls,” she said, aiming to make River feel better. “That’s thirty-six, in case you didn’t know, and the box said it served eight.”
River laughed and rubbed her tummy.
“You having pains?”
“No, the baby’s just active. She thinks kicking my bladder is fun.”
“She?” Lanie asked.
“Yes. Last week Cora changed my status to permanent employee so I could get benefits. She set me up with her friend in town, an ob-gyn. I had an ultrasound today. I’m glad she’s a girl. I like girls far better than males right about now.”
“So . . . you’re staying here in Wildstone?”
River hesitated and then nodded. “It’s nice not to have to worry about a job. And they’re so wonderful here.” She shook her head. “Earlier today Holden and Mark brought me a bassinet. They made it themselves, using the wood from old wine barrels. It’s beautiful and . . . amazing.” She hesitated. “I still feel like I landed on that Nice Planet.”
“You deserve for good things to happen to you, like anyone else,” Lanie said.
River met her gaze, hers suddenly hooded. “I’m not used to good things happening to me.”
Lanie didn’t want to be moved, but she was. “You heard about the electricity being out at the cottages?”
“And that we’re in the big house tonight? Yeah.” River didn’t look put out or anxious about that at all. “It’s going to be like a dream, sleeping in that big, huge place.”
Lanie, not wanting to burst her bubble, forced a smile. “Yeah, like a dream.”
Alyssa walked in with baby Elsa in a wrap against her chest. She started to go to the bar but saw River and Lanie, and headed their way instead. “Hey,” she said. “I’m picking up some food for Owen and I. How you two doing?”
Before either could answer, a scuffle broke out at the bar. Two guys had started an argument, getting off their barstools to do it, shoving each other with one hand, their other hands both still occupied with their beers, which sloshed over with every subsequent shove.
The bartender leapt over the bar and got between them, arms outstretched to hold them apart. “I’ve told you both you’re not allowed to be in here at the same time. I also told you that the next time it happened, I was calling the cops.”
“Call ’em,” one of them growled.
“Already did, dumbass,” the bartender said.
“Hey, he followed me here,” the other guy said, jabbing his beer in the direction of the first idiot.
“Because you told me you were going to ask my girl out!”
“Which I didn’t have to do since she asked me out!”
They tried to jump at each other again but the bartender grabbed for them and the three went down in a tangle.
The front doors opened and Mark strode in, hair still wet, in a sweatshirt and those board shorts, and put himself right into the fray.
“Oh my God,” River gasped.
“It’s okay,” Alyssa said. “This isn’t his first bar fight.”
Still, Lanie stood up in alarm, but in the next breath the fight was completely over. Mark had grabbed each of the idiots by the backs of their shirts and given them a shake. He then pulled them in closer and said something that had them both going still. He held on to them for an extra beat, holding their gazes with his quiet, badass, steely one before finally letting them go.
The two men slunk to the door, heads down.
“Oh my God,” River whispered again.
Yeah, and . . . holy cow, Lanie thought. The man was sexy as hell, which was something she already knew, but seeing him in action was . . . yowza. She looked over at River to make sure the level of hotness hadn’t put her into labor and realized River wasn’t impressed—she was horrified. And maybe a little scared. “Hey, are you okay?”
“Yeah.” She shook her head. “It’s the uniform. I mean, he’s not wearing it right now, but it doesn’t matter because he’s still all badass don’t-mess-with-me cop, you know? Makes you nervous as hell, doesn’t it? Like, he could decide to arrest you at any moment and lock away the key.” She paused and then grimaced at Alyssa’s and Lanie’s brows-up expressions. “Just me?”
“Cops make you nervous,” Lanie said carefully, not wanting to scare River off from talking about herself, but the truth was they were all insanely curious about her, as she’d said next to nothing about her background.
Not that Lanie was any better . . .
“Very nervous,” River said.
“My brother would never do anything to scare or hurt you,” Alyssa said, bouncing up and down a little as she talked, trying to soothe a now-irritated Elsa. “Well, unless you ate the last of Mom’s brownies. He really likes those.” She was obviously teasing and just as obviously trying to put River at ease.
But River didn’t look quite there yet.
Since Elsa was still fussing, Alyssa pulled her free of the wrap. “Here,” she said to Lanie. “Hold this a sec.” And then she thrust the annoyed little wiggleworm at Lanie.
Lanie automatically took her and then tried not to panic. “Um, I don’t know what to do with a baby.”
Alyssa looked amused. “Well, you pull her in closer to you, for one thing. She’s not a stink bomb.”
Right. Lanie did just that, settling the baby against her chest and shoulder like she’d seen Mark do.
Elsa stared up at her, not sure if she was pleased or pissed.
Alyssa grabbed a wing. “You’ve had bad experiences with cops?” she asked River.
River reached over and patted Elsa’s back with a soft smile for the baby. “Where I grew up, a cop sniffing in your business was nothing but trouble.”
“Was it just you and your mom growing up?”
“Yeah.”
“I can’t imagine how tough that was when she passed away,” Lanie said quietly.
“It wasn’t all bad. I waitressed at the truck stop and the other waitresses were really nice to me. I had all the food I could want and they let me couch surf when I needed.”
“And when you didn’t couch surf?”
She looked away and Lanie’s heart sank for the girl River had been. “You don’t have to tell us.”
River gave her a small smile. “It’s funny how easy it is to remove those memories from my mind right now with a great job and a roof over my head, you know?”
Lanie had never suffered for money like River had. Things had been tight after leaving home. She’d had to get loans for college and there’d been months and months where she’d lived paycheck to paycheck. But even so, she’d never worried about not having a bed or food.
“Things are really good right now,” River said softly, her hands on her baby bump.
Lanie had to smile at that. The girl—and she really was just a girl—was pregnant, with apparently no one at her back, and she thought things were good. Optimism. Something she herself was missing. She looked down at a now sleeping Elsa and felt a totally unfamiliar ache in the region of her ovaries.
Kyle hadn’t wanted kids. She’d told herself she’d been okay with that and maybe she’d believed it at the time, but right now, at age thirty, her ovaries were definitely starting to say otherwise.
Mark had turned to the bartender, offering him a hand, pulling him up off the floor, clapping him on the back. They spoke for a moment and then Mark eyed the crowd. His sharp gaze found them, and with one last word to the bartender, he headed right for their table.
His gaze was on Lanie and Elsa, eyes soft. “You look like a natural.”
Oh boy. That look combined with the warmth of the sleepy baby against her chest was probably potent enough to make her pregnant. Because she couldn’t help herself, she pressed her nose to Elsa’s neck and inhaled that unique sweet baby scent.
And there went her ovaries again.
“She’s cute, right?” Alyssa asked. “It’s not just me?”
Mark laughed. “Are you kidding me? They have big, suck-you-in eyes and they smell good. It’s a scam.” He set himself to the task of untangling the sleeping Elsa’s fist from Lanie’s hair, then gave the baby a quick hug. Talk about being a natural. He rubbed gentle circles on the baby’s back and then handed her off to Alyssa.
He then pulled Lanie upright—in a much nicer fashion than he had the fighting idiots. He slid one arm around her waist, buried his other hand in her hair, and kissed her hard and with quite a bit more tongue than she would’ve expected in public before he pulled back.
“I’m an ass,” he said quietly, pressing his forehead to hers. “I don’t always think to pretty up my words before I speak.”
She felt like she had whiplash. She’d just seen him as the tough, impenetrable, stoic cop, and now she was back to dealing with the sexy, alpha man who’d kissed her on the beach before reminding her he wasn’t going to ever fall in love again. “I don’t want you to pretty up your words for me,” she said.
“I appreciate that, but I’d still like to try. After I deal with the dicks outside. Will you wait?”
She hesitated and then for some reason nodded.
He gave her a small smile. “Later?”
“Later,” she whispered and watched as he strode outside to make his perps regret their most recent life choices. Then she sank shakily back to her chair.
“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” River said. “If I didn’t hate men so much, I’d start dating again just to get kissed like that.”
“It was a pretty great kiss,” Lanie managed.
They turned their attention back to the platter of wings, splitting a pitcher of iced tea in deference to the baby. Not what Lanie had come for, but it worked.
Holden showed up with a couple of other guys, but broke from the pack when he saw them. Well, not them, exactly, because he didn’t seem to notice Lanie or Alyssa at all.
Just River.
He’d changed from his work gear. Clean jeans, cleaner boots, and an untucked button-down shoved up on his forearms. His cowboy hat had been traded in for a baseball cap, which he took off. “Ladies,” he said. “Looking good.”
River rolled her eyes. “I’m big as a house.”
He shrugged. “I stand by my statement.”
River didn’t seem to know how to take that so Lanie kicked out a chair for him. “Want to join us?” she asked, purposely not looking at River shaking her head no-no-no behind his back.
“Thanks.” Holden sat and looked at River. “Wanted to know if you’d have dinner with me.”
“I already ate.”
“I meant another night. Any other night.”
River flushed. “Are you asking me out in front of Alyssa and Lanie?”
“Trying.” He slid them an apologetic look. “I’ve been trying to catch her alone to ask her, but she’s surprisingly sly and fast on her feet given how pregnant she is.”
Lanie smiled because River was beet red now.
“She’d love to go out with you,” Alyssa said.
Holden gave a rare smile, reminding Lanie just how good-looking a kid he was. “Great. I’ll pick her up tomorrow after work.” He rose, winked at Lanie, and stroked his fingers once over the back of River’s hand before walking away.
River gaped at them. “I can’t go on a date!”
“Why not?” Alyssa asked. “You’re single, right?”
“Yes, but look at me! I weigh as much as a two-ton cow. And I’m pregnant. And I don’t even know him!”
“You’re not even close to two tons,” Lanie piped in. “I’d be shocked if you were much over a hundred pounds. And being pregnant doesn’t mean you’re dead. As for not knowing him, that’s easily fixed by going on a date.”
River stared at her. “Why do you care?”
Lanie shrugged. “Maybe I want to see you happier than I am.”
“I don’t need a man to be happy.”
“Well, ain’t that the truth,” Alyssa said. “Look, you work hard, but you seem a little lonely. Holden’s a good guy with a good job and it’s clear he’s interested in you. What could be the harm in that?”
River shook her head and opened her mouth, but then closed it again. Lanie wondered what she’d been about to say, but it was really none of her business. And an hour later, when Mark still hadn’t returned, she drove herself back to the winery. Turned out that the bedroom they’d procured for her on the second floor at the end of the hall was . . .
Mark’s.
He would apparently be taking the twins’ room, who were having a sleepover in Aunt Mia’s room. Lanie stood in the middle of his bedroom looking around at the dark, masculine furniture and lush bedding and tried not to picture him lying in that bed wearing nothing but luxurious sheets.
Shaking off the image, she stole one of the T-shirts from his dresser for PJs and used the toothbrush someone had thoughtfully left for her on the bathroom counter. When a knock came, she debated whether to chicken out by turning off the lights and hiding under the covers—or running for the hills.
“I can hear you breathing,” came Mark’s low, amused voice. “Open up.”
Said the Big Bad Wolf . . .