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Save My Heart (Sticks & Hearts Book 3) by Rhonda James (7)

CHAPTER 6

SCOTT

I turn the Charger off the main highway onto Werkner Road and immediately floor it. Davis called and left a voicemail this morning, inviting me to dinner and reminding me that reporter from PLAY magazine is in town and I need to be on my best behavior when I meet her tonight. I couldn’t help flipping him the mental finger upon hearing that little demand. Christ, what does he think I’ll do? Pin her up against the wall and fuck her after meeting her? The guys have been riding my ass these last few months over my sexual escapades. Looking back, I have to agree I may have been a touch reckless. Last night’s near miss with Ashley was a much-needed wake-up call.

I’m already fifteen minutes late, and Davis just texted asking where the hell I am. He also told me to be ready for the surprise of my life. I have no idea what he means by that, but now I’m curious as hell. The drive to their house always seems to take freaking forever. It’s not my fault they live way out in the goddamn boonies. Bumfuck, Egypt, is how Masterson put it the first time he rode out here with me.

I pull up to the house and hear music filtering from somewhere inside. My eyes do a quick sweep of their yard and note how many cars are here. An SUV from the news station is parked in front of the house, and behind it sits a car I don’t recognize.

“You’re late,” Davis barks upon opening the door.

“Derek!” Laney comes up behind him, thumping him in the chest with the back of her hand.

“What?” He rubs at the spot on his chest. “Babe, he knows I’m just giving him a hard time.”

Laney wiggles her pregnant body between us to wrap me up in her warm embrace, which with her round belly and short arms is not an easy task. “Don’t listen to him. We’re still waiting for Brantley and Cassie to get here, so you’re fine. I’m so happy you could make it. It seems like ages since you were last here. Come on, dinner’s already out of the oven and everyone’s out back.” I follow them into the house and am met with the delicious aroma of garlic bread. “I made baked Ziti. I hope that’s okay. Derek may have mentioned it was one of your favorites.”

“Have I told you lately just how much I love you?” I kiss the top of her dark hair.

A soft giggle slips past her lips. “Not lately, but I’m extremely hormonal, so don’t be surprised if I burst into tears if you keep talking that way.”

“Well, I do. Davis, you’re one lucky guy. I hope you know that. This one right here is going to make the best wife and mother to all your beautiful little babies.”

True to her word, Laney breaks into a sob, and Davis quietly pulls her into his arms. He gives me a look that says I appreciate it, man, but shut the hell up, and I respond with a lift of my hands and shrug of my shoulders, mouthing sorry. I’m completely clueless here. Laney’s the first pregnant woman I’ve spent any amount of time around, and I don’t recall her being this emotional the last time we hung out. I watch helplessly, while he strokes her hair and whispers softly in her ear. I have to admit, seeing him in this role is still so strange to me. Before Laney came into his life, Derek Davis was a hardcore player. He was one guy who never seemed interested in settling down. I never heard him speak negatively of relationships. In fact, he’d always been very supportive of my dating Ashley. But everything changed when he met her. Watching them together admittedly leaves me feeling a touch nostalgic. I won’t lie. I miss the way it used to feel when I wrapped my arms around someone I cared for. Looking back, it wasn’t so much who it was but the familiarity of what they represented. Whatever Davis is saying must help, because she nods her head and sniffs loudly.

“Rivers, follow me. There’s someone I want you to meet, plus I have a really big surprise waiting for you,” he calls over his shoulder.

Curiosity gets the best of me, and I find myself trailing behind him like a trained puppy. The music becomes louder as we approach the door leading into the backyard, and just as I’m about to step outside, I hear it. The same laughter that knocked the wind out of me last night cuts through the surrounding noise and pierces my unsuspecting heart. Rendering me motionless. She says something, and my head instinctively turns toward the direction of her voice, and that’s when I finally see her. I mean really see her.

Honey-blond hair. Glasses perched on the end of her delicate nose. Full, pouty lips. One word comes to mind.

Beautiful.

As if seeing her isn’t hard enough, the guy making her laugh stands beside her, has his head thrown back laughing just as loudly. That’s another laugh I’d know anywhere. The hand on her elbow. The same hand caressing her bare flesh. Flesh I’ve touched. Tasted. Craved. That hand belongs to none other than my best friend, Jordan Masterson.

I must release an audible groan, because the next thing I know, Davis is asking what my fucking problem is. How the hell am I supposed to answer that? How can I be expected to do anything except wonder why the hell my ex-girlfriend is here, of all places, and what the hell Masterson is doing touching her? Holy shit. Did they come here together? A flicker of jealousy courses through me, but I do my best to keep my emotions in check. I’ve gotten really good at that over the last four years. Without thinking, I resume moving my legs in their direction. I’m no more than four feet away when she turns fully, and for the first time in four years, our eyes connect. I’m sure when she looks at me, she probably sees the shock registered behind my gaze, but amazingly, her eyes hold no surprise at all. In fact, looking at her now, I find her eyes hold only one emotion.

Dread.

What I find even more interesting is that her eyes rake over me, starting with my shoes, creeping higher and higher, finally coming to rest on mine. She blinks just once before turning back to Masterson, her lip curling distastefully as if I were the equivalent of a pile of dog shit she found in her backyard.

Guess that confirms my suspicion. She’s with him. Wow. What are the odds my best friend and I went after the same girl? I can’t believe it’s been four years. I take a good long look at her. She’s changed, but only in the best of ways. She seems more confident. More… Sensual. My instincts tell me that Skylar Dennison is no longer holding onto her v-card. What sickens me even more is the idea of Masterson being inside her when I never had a chance.

Nope, my subconscious reminds me, you saw to that a long time ago. “Dumbass,” I mumble quietly to myself.

“Shit, Rivers, you sneaky bastard. I didn’t hear you creep up on us.” He steps around Skylar to pull me in for a one-armed hug.

“What the hell are you doing here? You didn’t even call me. I would have picked you up at the airport.” I thump him on the back. We break apart, and I get a good look at him. He’s only been gone a few weeks, but somehow it feels longer. “You look good, man.”

“Sorry, brother. I wasn’t planning on coming, but I started thinking this may be the last chance for all of us to be together up at my parents’ cabin before your season starts up. So, I hopped on a plane and decided to surprise you guys,” he says.

“Consider me surprised. I’m down for a getaway.” I train my eyes on Masterson, fighting the urge to burn Skylar with my heated gaze. I can’t believe she’s blatantly ignoring me. What’s more, I can’t believe I even care. “Who else is on board?”

“Derek and Laney are down. I’m waiting for Cage and Cassie to get here, but I’m fairly certain they’ll be up for it.” He takes a step back and touches a hand to Skylar’s shoulder, forcing her to turn her attention back to him. I damn near bite off my own tongue the whole time his hand is touching her bare flesh. “And this beautiful lady right here is also invited. Scott, do you know Skylar?” he asks politely.

I open my mouth to answer, but her eyes implore mine, begging me not to say yes. The look on her face knocks me off balance almost as much as seeing her has.

“Umm, I...” she stalls, holding out her hand for me to shake. A handshake? As if we’re fucking strangers.

“By all means. Allow me,” Masterson jumps in, being the perfect gentleman he is. “This is Scott Rivers, the Devils’ newest goalie. And, Rivers, this is Skylar—”

“Dennison,” I finish his introduction, ignoring the daggers she’s shooting me. An uncomfortable silence follows as Skylar’s face turns three shades of pink and Jordan looks between us with confusion written all over his face. “We went to the same high school, but Skylar took off before senior year ended. Shame, too. I never got to say good-bye,” I clarify, watching the way she takes a breath, holds it, then releases it slowly. Attempting to calm herself. I may appear calm, but inside I’m livid. I can’t believe she was going to try and play it off like we didn’t know each other. To be honest, it pisses me right the fuck off, but only because she’s doing it to protect Jordan. At least that’s what it feels like to me. Well, screw that shit. “So, Skylar, I hear we’re going to be spending quite a bit of time together. I’m looking forward to catching up with you. I have a feeling we have a lot to talk about.” I grasp her hand, but instead of shaking it as she had originally intended, I lower my head and drop a single kiss on her delicate knuckles. Her hand visibly trembles beneath my lips, and though I should probably feel every bit the asshole she perceives me to be… I don’t. Not even fucking close.

My sister arrives with Cage following not too far behind. Cassie makes her way over to where I’m standing, opening her arms to give me a hug, but when her eyes land on Skylar, she lets out a squeal and those two start hugging and chattering so fast I can barely make out what’s being said.

Back when we were dating, Skylar and Cassie had been pretty good friends. My sister, being two years younger, always wanted to hang around us, and I fucking hated it. But Skylar never once discouraged it. She used to tell me I should be thankful I had a sister who looked up to me. And I did. I honestly loved being Cassie’s big brother. Loved that I was the one she came to with all her problems. Loved that I got to be the hero in her life. Then, one night, life as I’d come to know it stopped, and two weeks after that, it was as if I stopped caring about anything. It’s ironic how drastically my life changed after Skylar Dennison left town. I honestly believe that when she left Chicago, a piece of my heart went with her.

Losing her really did a number on my head and my heart. I know it’s my own damn fault. Believe me, for the past four years, I’ve had to live with the consequences of the choices I made that fateful night and the days that followed. I carried that guilt like a weight on my shoulders. At first, it suffocated me, but over time the weight began to lift. Slowly but surely, until one day it was no longer there. Then I met Ashley, and little by little a new weight began piling onto my shoulders. The weight of uncertainty.

If I’d been honest with myself, I would have known what needed to be done much sooner. Ashley and I weren’t right for each other. At first, that’d been hard to admit. My friends and Cassie kept telling me I’d changed, and I guess in my heart I knew they were right. But walking away from love a second time seemed almost harder than when I’d lost Skylar. Harder because not only did I have to admit I’d fallen out of love with Ashley, but I also had to come to terms with the reality that I’d failed yet another person. Only this time, the person I failed had been myself. For allowing Ashley to change me into someone I no longer recognized or even liked. With Ashley in my life, I stopped doing anything that made me happy. I basically cut off everyone important to me. Everything I did was to please her and keep her happy. And the whole time I was dying inside and never even saw it. She was so goddamn demanding, and I usually gave in, because it was easier than fighting. Did that make me a pussy? Probably. I’m just happy I got out when I did. Ending the relationship was the only way I knew to reclaim the last shred of me I had left.

***

Dinner’s over and we’re all gathered around the table. I’m on one end with Skylar on the other. During the meal, I found myself sneaking glances in her direction, but her eyes rarely strayed from her plate, as if she was avoiding me on purpose. I won’t lie. It’s killing me inside. Knowing I did this. Once upon a time, she was mine. And she loved me. Back then, I thought I knew it all. Now, I sit here, staring at the best thing that ever came into my life, and it’s crystal clear I don’t know jack shit about anything. Least of all love. The reality of this hits me, and suddenly it all becomes more than I can handle.

“Excuse me,” I murmur to no one in particular when I get up and head inside the house. I use the bathroom, pausing to splash cold water on my face before heading back downstairs. The hallway outside the bathroom is lined with photos. Pictures of the team. Laney’s family. Davis and Laney posing in front of the dance studio he designed and had built on their property. Photos of the two of them laughing and holding hands. Laney looking up at him, smiling the smile she saves just for him. He really is a lucky man. The difference between Derek Davis and me is that he knows how lucky he is. He found his happiness and fought to keep it. Maybe my happiness had been right in front of me when I was just eighteen. What if that was my one and only shot and I blew it? I scoff at my youthful ignorance then head back downstairs; however, what I find waiting for me when I get there is the last thing I’m expecting.

“I thought maybe we could talk.” Her eyes meet mine, and this time she doesn’t look away.

“S-sure. I’d like that. Let’s go in here.” I point to the den and follow close behind. So close my hand automatically lands on her lower back, and she gasps at the contact. Pulling the door closed, I turn to face her. The room is eerily quiet while we contemplate just what it is that needs to be said. I’m the one to finally break the silence, but only because these words have been on the tip of my tongue all evening. “You look beautiful, Blondie.”

Two things come to mind after the words are out there. One, calling her beautiful had always been my thing. She never saw herself that way, but I sure as hell did. Big doe eyes kept hidden behind the cutest pair of black frames. A natural blush that colors the apples of her cheeks. And finally, the most kissable pair of lips in the mid-west, maybe the entire fucking universe. Two, I called her by the nickname I’d affectionately given her that first day in high school when I’d approached her in the school library.

Her eyes fall closed and a smile touches the corners of her pursed lips. If what I just said affected her, she’s trying hard not to show it.

“My behavior outside… I’m sorry. I thought I was ready for this, but after all these years, nothing could have prepared me for seeing you again.” She swallows hard before nervously licking her lips. “You look really good, Scott. I’m so p-proud of you. You really did it. You made your dream come true.” Her hand lands on my forearm, and my eyes home in on the place where our bodies are joined. The heat of her touch zings through me, and my dick twitches. I quickly recite the Devils’ starting goalie’s stats. Anything to tame down the inevitable boner her touch is sure to bring on. As if sensing my inner turmoil, she brings her hand up to her mouth and her thumbnail disappears between her teeth.

She’s nervous. That makes two of us.

“Yeah. I guess I did,” I shrug as if it’s not a big deal. But we both know it is because of all the nights we would sit staring up at the stars and talking about our hopes and dreams. “Sometimes it still feels pretty surreal. I’m sure all that will change once the season starts.”

“I hope my being here isn’t going to make you uncomfortable. I need you to know I didn’t come here expecting anything. I’m here to do my job. That’s it. I don’t want to get in your way or cause any trouble with your girlfriend. I’ll blend into the background. You won’t even know I’m there.” She waves her hand dismissively.

I snort, but only because her statement is utterly ridiculous. There’s no way in hell I can be around her without it affecting me. It was the same way when we were teenagers, and if tonight is any indication, nothing seems to have changed.

Our fire may have been snuffed out, but the attraction we once shared still smolders. All it needs is the right spark to set it aflame.

“I don’t have a girlfriend, so that’s not going to be a problem. And for the record, you can try blending all you want; I’ll still know you’re there.” I reach tentatively for her hand, hoping like hell she doesn’t freak and run out of the room. Thankfully, she doesn’t move. In fact, I’m not even sure she’s breathing, but I’ve come this far, and I need to say this before I pussy out.

“I owe you an apology for the way things went down with us. Looking back, I handled that the wrong way. I never should have shut you out.”

Her mouth opens, and a small guttural sound eeks out. She slips out of my grasp and walks over to the window. I remain rooted, uncertain of what she’ll say next.

“I’ll admit I wasn’t expecting an apology. I waited six long months to hear you say those words, but after that I…” She trails off, but I don’t need to hear the rest to know what she was going to say. After six months, she gave up on me. Just as my silence hurt her, her unspoken words lie sour in the pit of my stomach. “Thank you. Hearing them now means a lot, but it’s probably best if we keep all that in the past. Where it belongs. I’d like for us to try and be friends. I realize I’m only here a short time, but I think it would make things easier on us,” she asserts.

I understand she’s trying to be strong, but I think she’s underestimated how well I know her. I don’t miss the small crack in her voice or the tremor in her hands despite being fisted at her sides. Back before we started dating, I’d been nervous about approaching her, even though girls had never intimidated me. But Skylar Dennison was different from every girl I’d ever dated. I spent four weeks watching her. Studying every move. Every reaction. For instance, she nibbles on her bottom lip when she’s excited. When nervous, she chews at the thumbnail on her left hand. And her hand always goes to her throat when she’s turned on. A simple gesture, really, but I remember watching as she read her favorite romance novels and the back of her knuckles would stroke the column of her delicate throat.

It takes mere seconds for me to cross the room until I’m standing behind her. The reflection in the window reveals her left thumb is between her luscious lips. Our eyes connect in the glass, and I offer her a smile.

“I’d like to be your friend,” I agree. “I’m looking forward to our time together. I’m happy to see you’re doing something you love. I’d really enjoy seeing some of your photos. You always had a great eye.”

“Ha! You’re only saying that because you were my favorite subject,” she scoffs before laughing.

I laugh along with her and try to appear sheepish. “Well, that certainly didn’t hurt. Seriously, Sky, I’m proud of you. You didn’t have an easy life, yet look at you now.”

She turns, angling her body to face mine, and crosses her arms protectively over her chest. “I didn’t have much choice. Circumstances like that can either destroy you or strengthen you. I chose the latter.” She shrugs.

My words are equally as quiet as I reach up and finger a lock of her hair. “I think you’re one of the strongest people I’ve ever known.”

“That’s funny, ‘cause right now, I’m not feeling very strong.”

Our lips hover mere inches apart, yet I don’t close the distance, even though I want to. God knows I want to. But I’m scared. There, I said it. Skylar Dennison scares me. I’m not talking timid or moderately frightened. I’m talking ‘freaking the fuck out’ and ‘damn near pissing in my pants’ level of scared.

Scared, but I’m still here. Right now, it will take an act of God to remove me from this spot.

Her breath is sweet and warm against my skin. Neither of us moves, and for a second I wonder if she wants this as badly as I do. I wonder if she’s thought about this as often as I have.

The temperature in the room has skyrocketed, but our hesitation speaks volumes. A kiss won’t erase the pain I’ve inflicted on her. I start to back away, but her arms circle my waist for a brief hug. It only lasts a moment, and then she’s gone just as quickly as she came back into my life, but I’m left holding my breath long after she’s left the room.

A few minutes later, I join her outside, where she’s saying good-bye to everyone. Their comments of “No, stay,” and her response of “Thanks, but I really should be going.” I can’t help feeling responsible. I came on too strong. I don’t know what came over me. Maybe it was the shock of seeing her after all this time or the fear of never having another opportunity.

“Are you joining us tomorrow? We’ll head out around lunchtime, and we’d love it if you came with us,” Jordan offers.

“You know, thank you for the invitation, but I think I’ll pass. I can use this time to work on my interview questions and take some shots inside the arena. Besides, you guys all know each other. I’d probably end up feeling out of place.”

“What the hell are you talking about, Skylar? You and Scott dated for five months, so you already know how weird we are.” Cassie rolls her eyes and laughs.

Not a word is spoken. You could hear a pin drop. Skylar’s eyes dart to mine, and Cassie appears confused.

“Wait.” Cassie looks around the group. “Didn’t you guys already know this?” Everyone but Cage shakes their heads.

“Scott?” Davis narrows suspicious eyes at me. “Why didn’t you say something earlier?”

I open my mouth to answer but only end up shaking my head. It’s Skylar who ends up answering his question.

“He didn’t say anything out of respect for me. It’s true that we dated in high school, but that was a long time ago, and I think we were both trying to keep this professional. Besides, it’s not a big deal. You guys go have a great time, and we can get together when you get back.”

Davis and Masterson both give me a look that says this isn’t over, but I shrug it off. I know they’ll probably have a hundred questions for me, but right now, all I can think about is the way she came to my defense. Just like she’d always done while we were dating. Back then, Skylar had been fiercely loyal, and it appears that’s another thing about her that hasn’t changed.

I follow her out to her car and hover by the driver’s side door until she’s safely buckled in.

“You sure you know the way back to the apartment?” I ask, voice heavy with concern.

“I’m good. Siri got me here, and I’m pretty sure she can get me back home,” she replies softly.

I lean in, forearms resting on top of the door. “Just so long as she doesn’t guide you all the way back home to Atlanta.”

Her eyes fall closed as a smile lifts the corners of her mouth. I’m still staring when her eyes crack open and her smile turns into a full-blown grin. “Not a chance, City Boy. I’m afraid you’re stuck with me for the next two weeks.”

“Speaking of that. You sure you don’t want to join us this weekend? I promise not to make things too weird for you,” I add to try and sway her decision.

“Positive. Go. Have fun. But when you get back, it’s all business. This story isn’t going to write itself.” She waves before shifting the car into reverse. “Good night, Scott.”

“Night, Blondie,” I call after her as she’s driving away. I stand on the curb, watching the taillights of the car dim as she drives further away from me.

One thing’s certain, I’m clearly not over Skylar Dennison. And our near kiss tells me she isn’t over me, either.

Not by a long shot.

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