Alexander

We could pretend, but why? We’ve lived in lies for too long. It’s time for us to live in truths. I escort my wife to the terrace for our reception. I left my jacket in the room and loosened my tie, unbuttoned the collar and rolled up the sleeves. I did tuck the shirt back in after fucking though. I’m not a complete classless prick.

But my wife. Damnnnn. Luckiest bastard ever.

It seems she is indeed trying to kill me, and all it takes is a dress change to do it. Dressed in a short muted gold dress that plunges into a deep and very noticeable V in the front, she smiles at me as we walk down the stairs. She changed her heels insisting it was too much sparkle for one outfit, trading them for even higher light brown shoes. She called them nude, but they’re shoes so nude doesn’t work for me. She promised to wear them and show me how good the red soles look draped over my shoulders if I ended the ridiculous conversation.

Sara Jane’s hair hangs down. It’s lighter these days like her burdens. She says she feels more herself with golden hair. I feel like I’m sleeping with a new woman. In many ways, I guess I am. We’ve both changed on the inside. I’m glad her inner glow shines on the outside. Her happiness is contagious to all around her, including me.

Her arm wraps around mine as we walk outside to cheers and catcalls. We circulate in opposite directions, and I keep my eyes on her. It’s hard to take them off her actually. The short skirt and higher heels make her legs look long and lean, and I have a million positions running through my head every time I look below her waist. Dirty thoughts I’m sure are written all over my face.

Red lips move through congratulatory smiles and thank yous. I don’t have to be a part of their conversations to read her body language. Often, her hand will run over the fabric above her scar. I wonder what she thinks about when she does that.

I think I know. She doesn’t want to talk about how I killed a man, but she knows. I killed the man who tried to kill her. I killed the man who killed Chad.

Chad’s absence is almost tangible. Standing with Cruise, we were shortchanged. Chad had a lot more to give, but we were fortunate to know him. It’s a reminder of a time I was racing toward a certain death, wanting to end the pain I felt when my mother died. I thought finding the killer and making him suffer would heal me. I thought revenge would be sweet.

I was wrong.

It was never about the search for answers. It was about the journey and the hard lessons learned. It was about holding the woman who held my soul in my arms and watching the life drift from her. It was then I prayed to something greater than myself to save her or give her peace.

But the answer was: I could give her that peace. I just had to remember who I was when I was with her. “Excuse me,” I say, leaving one group and walking straight across the party and slipping my hand into Sara Jane’s. Her gaze lifts to mine, and she smiles. Pulling her to me, I move us away from the others. “I forgot to give you something.”

“What is it?” Playfulness coats her question.

I reach into my pocket and pull out my phone, handing it to her. She types in the password and the screen lights up. “I bought you something special.”

Her smile extends before she looks at the phone. “You didn’t have to, you know? I’m happy spending the day with you, our friends, and family.”

“I know. I wanted to.”

She looks at a photo and the curve of her lips go straight before her mouth opens. “What is this, Alexander?”

I run my finger across the screen to show her the next photo. “It’s a house. I know you hate the manor, so I thought you might like a house. I mean, it’s more like a cottage really. Small. So small. Like my quarters might be bigger, but I thought maybe you’d like it. It’s called a starter home. Normal couples buy them as they start their lives together.”

“What? No, this is crazy. You bought a house?”

“For you. For us. For our family. If you want it.”

“I want it.” Her arms fly around my middle and she brings me to her. With just a whisper between us, she says, “I love the house, but you’ve forgotten, babe. We’re not just any ordinary couple. No matter how hard we try.”

Ordinary will never be possible when you own an empire, even a crumbling one. “It’s got a high-end security system in place, so we may not be ordinary people, but when we’re home, we can pretend.”

“You’ve thought of everything.” She kisses me, and adds, “Your present’s out front.” Reaching into the deep V of her dress, a key comes out, and she dangles it before me. “I hope I bought the right one.”

“I like the looks of this.” I’m about to sprint to the front of the manor, but she says, “Also, I spent $118,000. Hope you don’t mind.”

Chuckling, I remind her, “What’s mine is yours, baby.” We didn’t sign a pre-nup. What’s the point? Everything of value, everything that means anything to me, is wrapped in that little mini-dress and naughty smile. Having money to share with her is just bonus.

Cruise follows me to the front where a brand-new custom built Harley-Davidson is parked. Silver. Not black.

Light.

Not dark.

Knight in shining armor.

Not a dark prince at midnight.

From behind me, she says, “Sometimes even the bad boys have a good side.” I turn around and kiss her. Strong. Firm. With all my love for her.

She knows my moods. I have my mother back, but I’m dealing with aftereffects of shit I don’t like to talk about. The trauma of almost losing Sara Jane. The horror of killing a man in cold blood. The terror of not knowing if I’d leave that dungeon alive. The gnawing fear that perhaps we aren’t completely safe . . . I haven’t gone back to that place. I sold the penthouse and will never return to that building. I struggle with the dark feeling that I’m suffocating in the gloomy shadows. Thankfully, Firefly doesn’t mind the moonlight keeping us company at night. I find comfort in the soft glow through the night. I don’t talk about any of this, even with Cruise, who seems to need the same escape.

She says, “You’ve been driving the car lately, but I know how much you loved the freedom on the bike.”

“I love it.” The black Harley wasn’t feeling like me since my return. I still rode it, but not as often. “It’s perfect.”

I like to ride. I miss riding. Riding allows me to work through what happened, what I’ve done to others, and what I’ve seen. Riding allows me to take a breath and remember that my Firefly is alive and waiting for me at home. And she always is—with open arms every day and closed arms around me at night. A few moments I don’t want to remember. Like when she told me she wouldn’t leave me earlier because even in heaven sometimes we can’t escape our own hell. That takes time. Maybe it takes little cottages with white picket fences and silver, not black, motorcycles. Or maybe it only takes her.

I always knew she’d save me. One way or another, she was determined. I don’t care what sins I’ve committed. I seek forgiveness from only one—Firefly.

“I should go back to the party. Don’t be long, okay?”

As our hands slip away from each other’s, I reply, “Okay.”

Cruise walks around the bike and says, “I’d do it again to get another day like this.”

“Don’t go soft on me, Cruise Control.” I taunt him, but I get it. “It’s good to have a day without fears or remorse. It feels good to feel happy.”

“I’m happy for you.” He holds his hand out and when I shake it, he smiles. “I’m happy for me too.” He laughs but then confesses, “I had a gun in my mouth when your mother showed up.” He never talks about the torture he suffered, whether that’s for him or me, I’m not sure. I watch as some foreign emotion flickers through his eyes. “One minute. One minute that changed my life. One minute that saved it.”

I’m almost hesitant to ask, but I’ve always wanted to. Since he’s opening up, I do. “What happened?”

“The guy was shot in the head as soon as she walked in.”

Out of curiosity, I ask, “Did she do it?”

“No. I’m not sure who did. He had a mask on.”

“Jason?”

“No,” he replies. We’ve tried to figure Jason Koster out, but to no avail. The man is a mystery. From my understanding, he took a bullet to his side for my Firefly, so I back off when Mom and Sara Jane speak highly of him.

“I only saw his eyes. Brown, nothing distinguishable, but I did see a scar just below his eyebrow, running parallel. Small. About a half inch or so.” He takes a few steps and admires the bike. “Maybe one day more of this story will make sense. For now, I’m going to appreciate being alive. Congratulations on the marriage. She’s a good girl.” His quick subject change doesn’t confuse me. He needs these tiny moments to process what he went through.

“My girl.” The words echo like I said them for the first time yesterday.

He pats me on the back as he passes. “So what happens next?”

“Classes start soon. Got your books?”

“Picked them up yesterday. This school thing? I think it’s a wise choice. It’s always good to have a fallback plan.”

“Yeah. Probably.”

A smile pops into place. “Sweet ride.” It’s a rare sight, but I’ll take his goofy grin over none at all any time. He shakes my hand and brings me into a hug again. “See you out back, brother.”

“Brother.” I prefer brother over King when it comes to him. We’ve settled on Alex lately. It’s good to get back to my roots.

I swing my leg over the bike and push in the key. I don’t start it. I know it will purr like a tiger and I can’t take it for a ride anyway, not when I’m supposed to be at my own reception. A party I’m enjoying actually.

When I look up, Jason is leaning against the garage. I still don’t have a good read on him, but I feel like making amends these days, so I dismount and say, “I owe you a thank you.”

He comes over and shakes my hand. “You don’t.”

“My mom hasn’t said much, but I know you played a bigger part in her survival than either of you will let on.”

“She’s good at respecting privacy.” He looks at the bike and kicks the front tire. “Nice bike.”

“Does Sara Jane know you’re here?”

“We already said our goodbye.”

“Ah. How’d she take it? She’s not one to handle goodbyes well.” A shrug and a glance in another direction tells me what I need to know. “There’s something about her, something that makes you want to stay.”

“No point in hanging around any longer.”

“She’ll miss you.”

“You’ll comfort her, and she’ll forget about me.”

“What exactly happened in that mountain town?”

“You’re threatened over ancient history, King, when you don’t have to be. She’s loyal to a fault.”

King. Maybe I’ll let him keep calling me that. “I know.”

“Then why are you asking me about a time that doesn’t matter?”

I lean both hands on the leather seat and drop my head. “I came close to losing her.”

“Not to me.” When I look back up at him, he smiles. “She may have been two hundred miles away, but you were always on her mind.”

“If I could change one thing, it would be the day she came back. Even if it meant her not coming back to me.”

He nods, seeming to agree. “Emotionally, she was already home with you. She just hadn’t left yet. You can’t change fate, but you guys changed your destiny. Congrats on the big day.” He walks to my old motorcycle and says, “I’m taking this bike. You don’t need it anymore, right?”

“No. I think I’ll stick with this one for a while.”

“Take care of Sara Jane and Madeline, and tell Neely goodbye from me.” Jason moves the kickstand up and walks my black bike out of the garage.

“You can stay for the reception and tell them yourself if you want.”

“I think it’s best if I go.” The bike roars to life and he slips a helmet on. “A little word of advice. Don’t ever forget what you’ve got.”

“What’s that?”

“A reason to stay.”

“I won’t. Not ever.”

Adding dark sunglasses, he gives me a two-finger salute and takes off down the drive.

My new bike’s nice, but not as nice as my wife. Ten minutes is too long to be away from her side, so I return to the terrace. Toasts are made and I take over the music, wanting a chance to dance with my Firefly.

As twilight becomes night, “Heal” by Tom Odell starts playing just as I take her hand and guide her to the middle of the dance floor. We sway, but soon our arms are wrapped around each other—the music, like our guests, beyond our universe of two.

When one song ends, we stay for two more. It doesn’t matter that they’re fast and pop. We stay, slow-dancing the night away.

Until we’re starved. We make small plates, and I look up to find an unlikely trio together—Langley, Brown, and Cruise sharing some laughs. The murder on the West End was pinned on Garvey Penner as a break-in looking to rob the place, so he could buy more drugs for April. I’m not sure how that story was thrown into the mix, but it stuck, and the police stopped snooping around.

The attack on Sara Jane and Chad was a tangled web that Quincy helped navigate, and Brown and Langley were eager to close. After all, their two suspects were dead. Somehow they found Nastas’s cell phone and were satisfied with that evidence. Case closed.

Since he shot April, Brown went through his own hearing. It was determined to be in the defense of Sara Jane. His badge isn’t in view tonight, but neither is that asshole act he used to put on for me. We’ve come to a silent agreement. I lie low and don’t cause trouble. He lets us be, and right now we’re happy. I join them and am handed a cold beer by my best friend.

I keep an eye on my girl. Shelly drags her out to dance. It’s good to see them enjoying their time together. Laughing. Joking. Dancing like their friendship never imploded.

“How does it feel?”

Cruise elbows me, bringing me back to the conversation in front of me. “What?”

He nods toward Langley, who says, “I asked how does it feel to have your mother back?”

I look at him. “Great. It’s a mirac—” My sentence cut off abruptly, and I give him a second look. Scraping a finger along my brow, I ask, “How’d you get that scar?”

Langley touches a scar just below his eyebrow. “This old thing? Danger of the job. No big deal.”

I glance at Cruise, and he’s staring at him too. Langley’s height matches the man in the black cap I saw when leaving the building with my mom. I take a long pull on my beer then nod, trying not to let on that we know. But I have to say something. He’s the reason my best friend lives today. He’s the reason I’m alive. “Thanks for all you’ve done for my family and me, when you didn’t have to.”

“It’s my job,” he replies nonchalantly.

“I think we both know you’ve gone out of your way to help, so thank you. I would not be here today if you considered me just another troubled kid to deal with.”

He shifts uncomfortably under the compliment. “The bad guys got what they deserved.”

Brown interjects, “Justice. It’s always served.”

“Keep it up, fellas.”

A song begins, and I move around the terrace to find my mom. I love that I can turn around and see her again. “Will you dance with me?”

“It would be my pleasure.”

As we dance slowly, I see the woman behind the person I only saw as my mom before. She smiles and says, “Sara Jane is wonderful. I’ve enjoyed my time with her this last month.”

“Do you remember the night I thought I killed that firefly and cried?”

“I remember the night you thought it had flown away, but when you opened your eyes—”

“You told me if I set her free, she’d come back, and she did,” I whisper.

“Because the two of you were always meant to be.”

“Magic.”

“Magic.”

“Can I ask you about Neely?”

“She might be a better person to ask.”

Nodding, I reply, “Maybe, but I’d like to hear your side. Did she always know you were alive?”

“No. Like everyone else, I couldn’t tell her until I knew I could trust her not to tell anyone, even you.” She rubs my cheek. “I’m sorry about that.”

“I understand why you did it, but I don’t know why I couldn’t be a part of it.”

“Son, sometimes decisions are made that you may not fully understand but are made to protect you.”

I’ve made those with Sara Jane. I hated keeping her in the dark, but it was to protect her. Now I know it’s better if she knows. “He loved you.”

“He loved money more than me, more than his own blood. He loved power. He wasn’t meant to die. He resorted to something none of us would have chosen for him. I firmly believe he took that route because he knew he had no other outs. With all the dirty deals he had made, he would have ended up in jail eventually. He doesn’t matter now. Our goal was to secure your future, and that’s been done.”

“You really don’t want any of the money?”

“Now that I’m alive again, I have access to my own funds. Just promise that no matter how much money you have or make, you don’t lose sight of the woman over there, who can’t seem to take her eyes off you. Love her with all your heart, Alexander.”

“That’s an easy promise to make. After all, you both taught me how.” I lean down and kiss my mom on the cheek.

I pass Sara Jane’s parents slow-dancing with champagne in their hands and smiles on their faces. I nod to her dad, and he sends an approving one back. Neely and Sara Jane are chatting quietly off to the side. When I approach, Sara Jane’s hand reaches for mine. I take it, happy to have the contact. I listen as she tells Neely, “You once told me some people only shine when they’re free. I thought you meant me, but you meant Alexander.”

She nods. “You freed him from the curse he was wearing like a noose around his neck.”

“It came in the form of a coat of arms,” I add.

She squeezes my hand. “You’ve been freed.”

Neely smiles. “Blood and a last name don’t dictate the person you’re meant to be.” She reaches out and touches my cheek. “You’re so much like your mother.” There’s no need to explain which mother. Thank God I only have the one who wants the best for me. “You’re unwavering and clever, and when you love, you love big. Congratulations on the nuptials.”

I hug her. “Thank you for always being here for Sara Jane and me.”

Sara Jane adds, “Thank you.”

Smiling, Neely jokes with her, “I’ll handle things around here. You have your hands full with this one, so just enjoy being a newlywed.”

Weddings seem to bring out the sentimental in me. I lean over and hug her. “Thank you, Neely. For all you have done for me, but mostly for continuing to believe in me even when I stopped believing in myself.”

“I’d do anything for you and Sara Jane. I hope you know that.”

“I do.” Wrapping my arm around Sara Jane’s shoulders, I reply, “And we’d do the same for you.”

“Before I forget, thanks for the pay raise.”

“More than deserved.”

This time it’s Sara Jane that excuses us. “It’s been an amazing day, but I’m ready to leave for our honeymoon.”

Now that’s a plan I can get onboard with.

* * *

As the private jet’s engines roar to life, I reach over and take Sara Jane’s hand. “You ready?”

“You’ve already given me the ride of my life, Alexander Kingwood. I can’t wait to see what you have planned next.”

“Buckle up, baby. This journey’s just beginning.”