CHAPTER FIFTEEN

The first few days were the hardest. Those were the days and nights that every time Chloe let her guard down; her mind would want to travel back to that kiss. His lips had been as soft, and as sweet as she had believed they would be and twice as unforgettable. She had to fight off the urge to use the card he had given her and call him up. She wanted to see him again, but she didn’t. She wanted another kiss, more than that but she didn’t. The bottom line was she knew better. All she had to do was look past the fact that he had been a perfect gentleman and that he’d kept every one of his promises even the one to not show back up at the club and remember Jesse. On the third day after their dinner, she took out her journal and wrote:

June 8, 2011

Okay, I let myself have it…three days of agonizing over how badly I want him, three nights of dreaming about taking that sweet kiss to the next level…and now I’m finished. Today is the day that I remind myself how sweet Jesse’s kisses used to be. Today I remember the first day I saw him on campus…it was like an ethereal vision and I knew in my heart that he was the one. Today I remember our first fight and how he had left me feeling so small and insignificant as he went out with his friends and got drunk…and then I’ll remember how he had come home that night and pawed all over me and I had let him, calling it ‘making love’ in my heart, but knowing it was something dark and twisted inside my head.

Today I remember the first time he hit me and the first time he brought me flowers to say he was sorry. Jesse wasn’t a perfect gentleman…he was a perfect actor who gradually morphed into a thing that nightmares are made of. I am nowhere near ready to trust that isn’t who and what Derek is as well. I threw the card away…I’m not going to call him. I’ve worked too hard and come too far to risk it all for a pair of crystal blue eyes.

She put the journal away, slipped on her robe and went out to make the coffee. She was surprised to find Lexi up already until her “tax guy” suddenly came into view. He had the decency to at least be wearing pants and look embarrassed about being in her kitchen without a shirt on.

“Good morning,” Lexi almost sang out. Chloe couldn’t help but smile at her. She seemed almost giddy.

“Good morning,” she said to her roommate. Then she looked at the man who Lexi had introduced her to last week and said, “Good morning Brett.”

“Good morning, Chloe,” he said as she went over to pour her coffee. She heard him rise behind her and when she turned back around, he had left the room. She looked questioningly at Lexi, and her friend said, “He went to put on his shirt. Do you mind if he comes with us today?”

“To the playground?”

“Yeah, I told him this was our weekend to help, and he said he would love to lend a hand. We never have enough men to do the heavy lifting, and he has tools.”

“He can come,” Chloe laughed, “I’m not going to be responsible for turning down help. This playground has been closed down for almost a year. It’s a mess. Did you tell him that?”

Lexi shrugged, “He’ll be fine with it. Are you working tonight?”

“No, Roxi gave me this weekend off since I worked the last three. Are you?”

“Yeah, but I don’t have to go in until seven. I’m just covering for Callie for a few hours.”

Brett came back in then, dressed in a Hawaiian print shirt and a pair of jeans. He looked like a tax guy on vacation. Chloe excused herself and went to take her shower. She dressed in a pair of faded cut-off jean shorts and a pink t-shirt and tennis shoes. Today was her day of the month that she volunteered for Hannah’s hearts. She was looking forward to it more than usual. They would be working on cleaning up a playground on the west end of Providence that needed a lot of work and TLC. It would give her mind a much needed break from dwelling on Derek. She pulled her long brown hair back into a ponytail at the nape of her neck before slipping the blue contact lenses she had taken off to cover her own brown irises. She grabbed her back pack that she had filled with odds and ends for the project and went out to let Lexi and Brett know she was ready.

Brett insisted they ride in his pick-up to the park in case Liz…the lady in charge of the project needed anything hauled in or out. Chloe could tell that he was trying hard to impress Lexi, and it was working. That was okay though, he seemed like a nice guy, and after having to put up with creeps all week, Lexi deserved some time with one of those.

There were already quite a few volunteers there when they got to the park. Chloe went on ahead and found Liz.

“Hey,” she said, “Where do you want me to start?”

“Hi Chloe, thanks for coming. How about you help Donny and his brothers with trash detail for a while until we’re ready to start hanging up swings and painting. Is that okay?”

“Sure,” Chloe agreed.

Donny was a sixteen year old kid who had a huge crush on her. He was sweet though and always respectful, so Chloe didn’t mind. His brothers, on the other hand, were ten year old twins and if she suspected right they suffered from ADHD, or she should probably say that everyone on the west end suffered from their ADHD. They weren’t bad kids, they just had way too much energy, and it usually got them into trouble.

“Hi Donny,” she said as she walked up behind him. He was picking up trash next to the dirty little man-made pond, and his wild little brothers were chasing a goose behind him.

“Oh hey, Chloe,” the boy said with his face coloring instantly. “How are you?”

“I’m good. What about you?”

“Ah, I’m okay. Mom made me bring the boys today. She had to work.” Donny’s mother worked for an escort service. Chloe knew that because Liz told her. She wasn’t sure if Donny knew it or not.

“At least they have lots of room to run around,” she said with a smile. “You have an extra bag?”

“Yeah, here you go.” He handed her a bag and then said, “Here, I made these for us.”

He handed her a stick that had been sharpened to a point on the end. “That way we don’t have to touch some of the more questionable things. Even with gloves, it can be kind of gross.” Chloe put on her gloves and thanked him. She completely agreed.

They found a little bit of everything when they did these clean-ups and sometimes that thin rubber barrier didn’t seem like enough. She picked up her bag and with the chatter of the twins in her ears she began picking up trash. It never failed to amaze her how little respect people had for their own environment. She had been working for about a half an hour when she suddenly heard Donny say, “I’ll be damned, I wonder what that guy did.”

She looked in the direction that Donny was looking and couldn’t believe her eyes. It was Derek Stark, stepping out of a sleek, black SUV. He was wearing a white t-shirt that stretched nicely across his hard chest and biceps and a pair of blue jeans. He looked just like the rest of them, except for the shiny car and the fact that he was probably the most gorgeous thing the little old park had ever seen. She could actually feel her face go pale as the blood drained out of it. What the hell was he doing here?”

“You think he’s a rock star or something doing community service?”

“Um…I don’t think so,” she said. She held out her bag and said, “Hold this for me for a sec Donny, I’ll be right back.”