Chapter
22
Bobby
Five hours later at San Antonio International Airport…
If one more TSA Security Officer patted me down, I was going to start killing people. Just because a guy was a little nervous and jumpy, did not mean he was a terrorist carrying a bomb. At least, not a bomb of the physically exploding variety. I was, however, carrying an emotional bomb in the form of an expensive shiny rock attached to a little gold band. If this went badly, it could end up making me the equivalent to an emotional suicide bomber. Because, if she said no, I was going to be blown away to nothingness.
I was standing at the luggage carousel, looking for my bag with the picnic supplies in them, when I felt a presence stop next to me. Looking over, I instantly started to regret listening to my son about this part of the plan. Giving the irritated man a polite nod and a mumbled “Sheriff” as a greeting, I turned my attention back to the sight of luggage rotating round and around, in the hopes mine would show up very soon. The quicker I got my luggage, the quicker I got the hell out of this airport, which also meant I would be one step closer to being rid of the man next to me after he dropped me off at my destination. Would it be possible to ignore him for that long?
“You better not be dicking her over again, Baker.”
Well, I guess that was my answer to the ignoring question. Apparently not.
My luggage finally came into sight; I reached over, plucked the bag off the conveyer belt, and then turned to start walking towards the exit. The Sheriff stayed with me every step of the way. Why, oh, why, had my son thought having this douchebag give me a ride would be a good idea?
Maybe Seth had been lying to me all those weeks ago when I’d poured out my heart and soul to him on the phone and apologized for having hurt his mother and, by extension, him. Perhaps this was a form of punishment from him for what I’d done and said in the hospital before leaving Texas without so much as saying goodbye to him. If that was the case, my boy had a mean streak a mile wide.
Sheriff Jenkins and I managed to make it to his SUV without saying another word, but after he unlocked the vehicle and we climbed in, the gloves were off. It was time to nip this shit in the bud. “Let’s get something straight here, Jenkins. I fucked up. I understand you’re a good friend of Belle’s and, I also know you have feelings for her in more than a friendly capacity. The fact of the matter is, though, I don’t owe you an explanation. I owe her one. As well as an apology. However, in the name of starting over with a clean slate, I’ll at least give you this; I love that woman more than you will ever be able to even fathom. I have every intention of making things right between her and I. I’ve lost too much time with her as it is. I’m ready to do whatever it is I have to do to make her realize how sorry I really am and put the past behind us. That’s all you really need to know. I’ll make sure she sends you an invitation to our wedding, though.” I gave him a shark’s smile, practically daring him to say something else.
The muscle in his jaw tensed before he looked away from me and started the engine. I almost breathed out a sigh of relief. Not that I was seriously worried the Sheriff could cause trouble for me with Belle, but I didn’t need any more problems than I already had. Until I was face to face with Belle and she had agreed to hear me out, I was walking a fine line between nervously on edge and going totally postal. Between now and then, I was going to be praying for a miracle.
~~~
Annabelle
My kid was going to drive me nuts.
“Tell me again why we have to go to Victor Braunig Lake? It’s six o’clock, Seth. It’ll be dark soon and I’m already tired.”
“Because you need to get the hell out of the house, Mom.”
“Do I need to wash your mouth out with soap? You only dropped the occasional cuss word before, now that you’re talking to your father on a regular basis it seems like I’m having to tell you daily to watch your mouth.”
“You can’t blame Dad for my vocabulary. It’s half your fault too, and I thought you were happy I was talking to Dad so much?”
Hoo-boy. I’d stepped right into that minefield, hadn’t I? “I am happy about it, son. It’s good you have him in your life now. You can talk to him every day if you want, just please don’t talk to him about me. Not until I’m ready to talk to him myself.”
“I haven’t told him about the baby, Mom,” he murmured. After a brief span of silence he asked, “But you’re planning on telling him soon, right?”
I nodded. “Yeah. Waiting these past few weeks is long enough. I don’t want him to think I’m trying to hide this baby like I hid you from him. It’s a miracle this baby even made it through Mexico, so I’m hoping he’ll be happy about it.”
Shaking my head absentmindedly, my mind drifted back to the day, three weeks ago, when I’d found out I was pregnant. It was mid-afternoon and I was hunched over the toilet for the fifth day in a row, puking my guts out with Seth hovering behind me, holding my hair. He was complaining about he didn’t understand how I could possibly puke so much when I hadn’t been eating. The next thing I knew, he was on the phone with Charlie, asking him to come over, telling him that he was worried I had some kind of infection from my wounds because I was sick and throwing up everywhere.
I was still praying to the porcelain god when Charlie showed up out of his mind with worry. He’d promptly taken one look at me before stating, “Darlin’, you look like shit,” and then commenced cleaning me up with a cool rag before laying me back down on my bed. He shushed my protests when he lifted my shirt up to peel back the bandage there and check. When he didn’t find anything wrong there he checked the bandage down the front of my thigh. The staples had been removed and replaced with smaller stitches last week, but that wound was clean and infection free as well.
Not knowing what else to look for, Charlie asked what my symptoms were. I told him I was fine. I’d only been sick to my stomach for a few days and it was probably a stomach bug of some sort. By the look on his face, my friend didn’t seem convinced. Charlie studied me for a few minutes before he mentioned I looked as if I’d lost at least fifteen pounds and asked if I was depressed. I shook my head, then a pensive look crossed Charlie’s face, and his eyes seemed to grow weary. When he asked me next if I was pregnant, he paid no attention to Seth’s gasp, who was now hovering at the end of my bed and waiting for my answer.
At first I was too shocked to answer him. Then I denied the likelihood because, really, what were the chances of me not having a miscarriage after what I’d endured in Mexico? However, the longer I’d thought about it, the more memories from Seth’s pregnancy came back to me, and the more it made sense. One pregnancy test, bought later by Charlie, complete with two faint little blue lines, and I had my answer.
For the second time in my life, I was having Bobby Baker’s child. Only this time, I would do what I should have done the first time. I would let him know about the impending bundle of joy. Or at least, I was hoping with all my heart he considered this baby a joy. No matter what had gone wrong between the two of us, this baby should be loved unconditionally. While I was worried about his initial response, a part of me knew he would undoubtedly love any child of his own, even if he couldn’t forgive the child’s mother for her past wrongs.
Pulling myself back to the present, I took a quick glance at my son to see he was watching me intently. “I’ll call him tomorrow, honey. I promise. We’re pulling into the Lake’s entrance now. Where am I going?”
“Go park over by the far end where the picnic tables end, towards the dock.”
There wasn’t another vehicle in sight, the lake and the park around it looked completely empty. This could end up being a peaceful outing for my frazzled nerves. Pulling the truck over to where Seth had indicated and parking it, I turned to question him. “So, what are we going to do now?”
Rolling his eyes, he opened the truck door and hopped out. “Come on already, it’s a surprise.”
I got out of the truck and followed him as he started walking in the direction of the far end of the lake. The sun was starting to set, casting a gorgeous gradient of colors across the sky from orange to purple. The wind was blowing gently off the calm lake waters, making the leaves sway on the trees around us. My curiosity for my son’s adamant demands we come here today were finally dying down. I was starting to relax, assuming we were here to walk around in the fresh, crisp, autumn air, when I spotted a blanket laid out on the ground with a bag sitting on it.
Putting a hand out to grab Seth’s arm I stopped him. “Someone’s already over here. Let’s turn around and walk the other way so we don’t disturb them.”
“That blanket is for you, Mom.”
Shooting a confused look at him, I asked, “How could that be for me?”
That’s when he stepped out from behind one of the trees near the blanket. “Because our son helped me plan a surprise picnic for you.”
My heart dropped to somewhere around my toes and my lungs ceased to work. With the way he’d broken my heart two months ago, I should have turned around and walked away without a word. I knew, without a doubt, I couldn’t take another blow to my heart like that. Yet, I couldn’t seem to move my feet away, or take my eyes off him for that matter.
He looked a bit ragged with dark circles under his eyes and five o’clock scruff on his face. I couldn’t be sure since he was naturally a big, buff guy, but he might have lost a few pounds, too, because his face looked a tad leaner. Besides that, he still looked like the heart-stoppingly handsome man who invaded my dreams every night. He was wearing those jeans I loved so much, the ones that hugged his thighs a little bit and cupped his perfect ass, with a plain white t-shirt on top, and I damn near drooled at the sight of him. Of course, that he looked so good only reminded me that I did, in fact, look like utter shit.
Dropping my hand from Seth’s arm, I smoothed my now sweaty palms down the front of my thighs, and managed not to cringe when my hand pressed a little too hard into my left leg’s stitches. Bobby was slowly looking me over from top to toe and, the longer he looked, the more tense little lines seemed to appear around his mouth and eyes.
My stomach suddenly felt like it was doing cartwheels and I had to take a few deep breaths to try and stop the nausea that was trying to bubble up my throat. Why in the world did doctors call it morning sickness? They should have named it ‘All-damn-day’ sickness instead. Now was definitely not the time to toss cookies because of the growing peanut in my belly, either. Wouldn’t that be wildly romantic?
“What are you doing here, Bobby?” My voice cracked, revealing how nervous I was.
“What I should have done fifteen years ago.”
“Huh?” I asked, totally confused as to what he was saying.
“I’m here because I’ve finally come back to get my girl.”
Seth started backing up. “I’m going to go over by the picnic tables ‘til Charlie gets here to pick me up.”
Bobby held his hand up to stop him as he walked towards me. “Wait a minute, Son. You deserve to hear this, too.” Dropping to both of his knees on the ground right in front of me, he grabbed my hips when I went to take a step back from him, and held on tightly. “Please, give me a few minutes to hear what I’ve got to say.”
It was unnerving, considering my circumstances, how his face was right there, next to my belly, where his child lie, and he had no idea. It made me feel uncomfortable and more than just a little bit guilty about not having told him yet, but his eyes looked almost tortured as he pleaded with me, so I ignored my discomfort and nodded.
He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, baby. I was wrong and hypocritical. We both made mistakes, but you were good enough to forgive me of mine. I was an ass to not forgive you of yours. I’m tired of thinking, If I could only go back and change this… because I can’t. I can’t undo leaving you in Georgia, just like I can’t undo my pigheadedness here in Texas.” The breath seemed to hitch in his chest and I watched as his eyes grew watery before he blinked to clear the tears away. “What I can do is say, I’m sorry. I feel like we’ve overused that word these past few months, but it’s the truth. I am sorry. I also forgive you. I’m hoping you’re willing to forgive me again, too, because I meant everything else I said in your hospital room. I can’t live without you, Belle. If you’re not around, it feels like there’s no reason to wake up every day. You seem to be the reasoning and motivation for everything in my life and I want that back. Say you’ll give me another chance, love. Please?”
Tears were streaming down my face. My nose was running. I probably looked like a red-eyed, puffy-faced, hideous nincompoop. Yet, none of that mattered because all I could think was if this was real, it was like a dream come true. What scared me the most right now was that it might not actually be real, but in fact a dream. So I reached over and pinched myself hard in the fleshy part of my arm and yelped in pain right in front of Seth and Bobby.
Bobby quickly grabbed the hand I’d used to pinch myself and looked at me like I was certifiable; which, at the moment, I was feeling anyways.
“Babe, what did you do that for?”
Wiping my eyes and then the snot running from my nose away with my free hand, I laughed. “I had to make sure I wasn’t asleep and this wasn’t a dream. It seemed too good to be true.”
A slow smile spread across Bobby’s face as he tightened his grip on my hips and pulled me closer to him. My thighs were touching his chest now. His head tilted back to keep looking me in the eye. “This is not a dream, sweetheart. This is very real and I’m asking you for another chance at our long ago planned happily ever after. What do you say?”
I wanted that so badly. More than anything I’d ever wanted besides the children Bobby had given me. I had to come clean with him first before I could tell him yes, though. I refused to renew a relationship with him when I, once again, had a secret he needed to know about.
“I have to tell you something first, Bobby.”
His brows furrowed, lips turning down at the corners, clearly displeased to not be getting the answer he wanted yet. “It can’t wait?”
“Absolutely not. You have to know this before we go any further. I won’t have you mad at me for keeping secrets anymore, Bobby Baker.”
“What other secrets could you possibly have, Belle?”
God, here it was. The moment where it could all go wrong again. My teeth bit down into my bottom lip in fear and I took one last second to memorize his face in this moment in case it all went south. One last memory to save in case this finally pushed him too far away emotionally for anything to be saved. His fingers flexed into my flesh in impatience, and I knew I couldn’t wait any longer.
“Remember the night we played poker with Declan and Riley?”
His frown deepened. “Yeah, what about it?”
I took a big breath of courage. “Remember what happened between us that night?”
His irritation morphed into confusion. “One of the best nights of my life, babe. I’m not going to forget it anytime soon. What are you getting to here?”
Reaching down to grab one of his hands, I dragged it slowly up my body until it laid over my stomach. He looked from my face, down to our hands, and back up to my face again. Clearly not getting what I was trying to hint at here.
“I’m pregnant, Bobby.”
He looked dumbfounded now. The color slowly draining out of his face as the hand that had still been gripping my hip quickly snaked around my legs and hugged them tightly. In a shaky voice he said, “You’re telling me… when you were kidnapped, you were pregnant?”
Oh, no. Did he think I knew I was pregnant even then and hadn’t told him? There was no way I could have known then. I would have only been two weeks along. Terrified this was the beginning of the end, yet again, I whispered with a tear laden voice, “Yes, but I swear I didn’t know, Bobby. I swear! Apparently, the San Antonio hospital hadn’t caught the pregnancy because my HCG hormones were on the low side. I didn’t figure it out until three weeks ago.” Babbling now, “I know I should have told you sooner than now, but I needed some time before talking to you again. I was hurting so badly, both physically and emotionally, I couldn’t face you yet. That’s all. I swear—”
Bobby moved our hands and buried his face into my stomach. His shoulders started slightly shaking and it took me a little bit to realize he was crying. I laid a shaking hand on top of his head tentatively, waiting to see if he would jerk away from me in disgust or anger. When he didn’t, I slowly ran my fingers through his short, military cut hair, trying to soothe both of us with the comfort of it.
Suddenly, his head jerked back to look at me, thin streaks of wetness clearly running down his face, and he croaked, “I could have lost you both! And if I had, I would have never known of the gift you were giving me because I was too much of an asshole to be man enough to forgive and be forgiven in return. Christ, I’m so sorry, Belle. Please, tell me you’ll forgive me. I can’t believe I could have lost both of you.”
Framing his face with my hands, I felt my heart beat in double time as it practically exploded with hope and love over this man on his knees, begging me for the one thing I never thought I’d really have. A future together.
My throat was tight, choked up with overwhelming emotions. Still, I managed to push the words out I needed him to hear. “I love you, Bobby. Always have and always will. There’s nothing more I want in this life than you and our family.”
“Does this mean we’re moving to Virginia?” Jumping in surprise, I looked over to where Seth stood a few feet away. His hands tucked shyly in his pockets, as if he were embarrassed to be intruding, and a big smile plastered on his face. Looking back down to Bobby, I realized he looked almost as shell-shocked as I did. We’d both forgotten our son was standing here with us. Dag-gum. You definitely didn’t earn the parent of the year award by forgetting all about your kid. No matter how quiet they were.
“I’m moving you guys to Virginia. We’ll pick out a house with a big backyard to throw the pigskin in and buy it right away. You’ll have to help me paint a nursery, too.”
Seth nodded his head excitedly. “I can do that, Dad. No problem. I know you told me to stay and all, but can I go now? Charlie’s over in the parking lot waiting… and I figured you two would want some time to…” He waved his hand in the air to indicate both of us. “You know.” His cheeks blushed bright red. “Yeah, so can I go now?”
Bobby nodded back to him. “Go on so your mother and I can… you know.” He smiled at his son’s renewed blush and then we both watched Seth jog away to Charlie, who was indeed waiting in the parking lot. We watched as Charlie’s truck disappeared out of sight, and then we were left alone in the park by the lake.
Bobby got up off his knees and dragged me by the hand over to the blanket. “Sit down, babe. You should still be resting.” He pushed me gently to take a seat on the blanket and then sat down across from me, stretching his legs out on either side of me so that I was surrounded by him. “How have you been healing?”
“Pretty good. They took the staples out of my leg and replaced them with stitches. I’ll have my stitches for a couple of more weeks before they all come out.”
“What about the pregnancy? Have you seen a doctor yet?”
“I went to my OB/GYN a few days after taking the home pregnancy test to have it confirmed. She was amazed the baby had survived the trauma I’d endured in Mexico, but she says it looks healthy. I’m two and a half months along now.”
“It? When can we find out the baby’s gender? I don’t like the idea of calling it ‘it’.”
I smiled indulgently at him. This pregnancy would be a first for him since he’d missed Seth’s, and everything was new and exciting. “In about two months they should be able to tell us from an ultrasound.”
He leaned forward until our faces were only a few inches apart. “Do you want a boy again? Or a girl this time?”
“I want a healthy baby with ten fingers and ten toes. I don’t care what he or she is.”
“Me either, babe.”
I closed the distance between us and softly placed my lips on his. They were warm, familiar, and too good to be true. They felt like I’d come home. Bobby quickly took the kiss further, slipping his tongue inside my mouth to intertwine with mine, and I quickly got lost in the feel and taste of him. So beautiful. So masculine. And all mine.
When I thought things were about to get infinitely better, he pulled away, leaned back to snag the strap on his bag, and pulled it to his lap so he could start digging through it.
Confused at the abrupt change of plans, I asked him, “What are you doing?”
“Hold on one second. I’ve got something important to give you.” Digging out a folded piece of paper, he held it out to me and said, “It’s long past time for you to have this.”
Unfolding the paper, I noticed it was a bit dingy looking, as if whatever it was was old and had been handled a lot. Looking up at the top, it didn’t take long to realize I was right because it was dated fifteen years ago, about a week after Bobby had sent the letter breaking things off with me. My heart plummeted.
Looking back up to him in alarm, I said, “This better not be another break up letter, Bobby Baker. After everything you said to me, if you are handing me another breakup letter, I will do things to you that most others would consider anatomically impossible.”
With a gentle grab of my wrist to the hand that held his letter, he started rubbing slow circles on my skin with his thumb. “Just read it, Belle.”
With nothing else to do except take a giant leap of faith, I read it.
Dear Belle,
I’m sitting here, waiting to hear from my parents. Praying they found you and explained that I’m a moron for sending you that letter. I didn’t mean it. It was a temporary moment of insanity; just the fear that if I tied you to me too young, you would resent me for it down the road, but I can’t let you go, Belle. If you end up hating me later for us getting married so young, I’ll have to find a way to make you love me again.
Like I said, I’m sitting here, hoping they found you. My buddy here in boot camp told me I had to think positive. So I’ve decided, in the spirit of positive thinking, we should write our own vows when we get married. I’m proud that you’re going to be my wife and I want anyone and everyone at our wedding to know it. Here’s what I was thinking about saying for mine:
‘I’m just an ordinary man, but you make me feel like I’m the strongest man in the world. I’m not worthy of the gift of your love, but I promise to work each and every day to become worthy of it. Today, you do me the honor of becoming my wife. To putting on paper with pen and making it official for the world to see what I already know. You were made for me, as I was made for you. With that gift, I promise to always love and cherish you. To be the strength you need when you feel weak. To hold you in my arms and make you feel safe when you are scared. To catch you if you should fall. Be your shelter from any storm. Most importantly, though, I promise to be your faithful best friend and lover from here until eternity.’
I hope you like them. They may be short and simple, but they’re from my heart. Hopefully I’ll get to hear from you soon. A letter saying you forgive your dumb Army grunt. I miss you so bad it hurts, baby. Please forgive me. Can’t wait to see you and hold you in my arms again.
Forever Yours.
Love, Bobby
A small wet drop appeared on the paper from a tear that had fallen off my face and it smeared a portion of one of the sentences. This was instantly the best letter in the history of the world to me. It wasn’t poetry pretty like others might be. It wasn’t something epic like people read in tales of unrealistic love stories like Romeo and Juliet. No, this was Bobby’s heart manifested in short, boxy little slashes that formed words in a letter so beautiful I could read it and see the physical proof of his love and devotion to me. It was perfection.
I heard and felt him move in front of me. When I looked up from his letter to see what he was doing, the sight of what he was holding shocked me all over again. A black velvet box held open in his hand, where a diamond ring was barely visible in the last fading rays of the day.
“Marry me, Belle. You’re already my heart and soul; now be my wife.”
He didn’t wait for me to answer. He slipped the ring out of its box and onto my finger before bringing my left hand to his mouth and kissing the palm of it before placing it over his heart. “Yes?” he whispered.
With fresh tears sliding down my face, I reached up with my right hand and cupped his jaw. “Yes, Bobby.”
He released the breath I hadn’t realized he was holding. “Thank you, baby.”
“No, Ace, thank you.”
“What are you thanking me for?”
“For giving me my happily ever after.”