Lulu

Hunter wrapped his large warm hand around mine, leading me down the hall to his apartment.

Something big was going to happen tonight, something besides me trying to blow Pierce’s brains out. The night I’d woken and found Hunter on the couch with Josh, his arms protectively around his little body, I’d felt the shift . . . deep inside me. And I knew I couldn’t fight it anymore. So I jumped off a cliff, praying like hell I landed on my feet and not my ass.

I wanted Hunter more than anything, and I refused to let Pierce take him from me, not again. And that’s what could happen if I didn’t give us a chance. That bastard would win. I owed it not only to myself but also to Hunter and Josh to try and make our little family work. I didn’t know what the future held for us, how we would make it work, or if I could give him all he needed, but I needed to try—I wanted to try.

Starting tonight.

We reached the door and I pulled him to a stop before he could open it. He turned to me wordlessly, brows lifted in question. I didn’t say anything. Instead, I went up onto my tiptoes, pulling him down at the same time and kissed him, deep and slow, giving him everything I had.

When we finally broke apart and he looked down at me, heat in his pale gaze. “What was that for?”

My belly fluttered and I shrugged, pressing closer to that tall, solid strength. “I just . . . I needed you.”

His eyes flared and the heat in them got a whole lot hotter. “Yeah?” He tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “That all you need?”

I shook my head, even while nerves fluttered to life. The two times we’d slept together since he kidnapped me didn’t count, that hadn’t been Hunter. He’d been angry and hurt, the situation volatile and confusing.

Tonight was different.

And for some crazy reason, taking that big step back to him, back to us, I was afraid, nervous I’d disappoint him. We’d both waited so long for this. We were finally back together, and I wanted it to be perfect.

For once Hunter didn’t question me, or ask me if I was sure, if I was all right. He trusted me to know what I wanted, what I needed. I clung tighter to his big, callused hand as he opened the door and led me inside.

Josh had fallen asleep while Ruby was looking after him, so now he was having a sleepover. A quick call from Hunter, and Zeke had agreed to stay with them as well.

We were all alone.

I bit my lip, nerves fluttering madly in my belly, along with excitement. I hadn’t decided which was winning out at that moment and it was throwing me off balance. I wanted this so bad I shook—to get back what we’d once had, what we’d lost, but I was terrified it wouldn’t be the same between us. So much had changed.

I just didn’t want to screw this up.

He carried on down the hall, towing me along behind. “I have something to show you.”

His voice sounded different, low, but there was also a hesitation I’d never heard from him before. He led me to the spare room where Josh had been sleeping and pushed the door open, flicking on the light.

I sucked in a breath, stunned. “Oh my God. How did you do all this?”

“Ruby and Zeke. Ruby picked out the blankets and curtains and shit like that a few days ago. I’d planned to take you out so she could set up. After the way things went down tonight, I wasn’t sure this was the right time, but it’s done now. So . . . yeah.”

I stepped farther into the room and spun in a slow circle to take it all in. The double bed was gone, replaced with a twin. It had bright green sheets, and the duvet was bright blue with green, red, and yellow cars all over it. The curtains matched. There was also a shelf on the wall with a stack of books, and the mat on the floor was one of those ones that doubled as a car track. A toy box sat in the corner of the room filled with beautiful new toys.

Shit.

Tears welled up and spilled over. I turned to Hunter. “Who got the toys and books?”

He took in my expression and frowned. “I did, but if you don’t like them, we can get whatever you want . . .”

“Don’t like them?”

“Yeah . . . I . . .”

That’s all he got out because I ran toward him and launched into his arms. He caught me like I knew he would, arms coming around me tight. I wrapped my legs around his waist and clung to him. “I love it. I love all of it.” I pulled back and scattered kisses along his jaw and chin. “Thank you, thank you for doing this for him.” I was rambling. Hot tears were running down my face.

“Fuck, Lulu.” One of his hands went to my ass, the other cupped my jaw. “No more tears, babe. Even happy ones. I don’t want to see you cry anymore. I just want to see that beautiful fucking smile. All I want is to make you happy. Give you and Josh the life you should have been having these last few years, with me.”

I felt a fresh wave of tears gathering, but gave him what he wanted, offering up a watery smile. “Th-thank you.”

He shook his head. “You don’t need to thank me. Looking after you and Josh is my job, my privilege, you understand?” He gave me a squeeze. “I don’t expect a thank you for taking care of my family.”

I started crying all over again. I buried my face against his throat—and bawled.

“Shit,” he rasped and we started moving again.

My eyes were squeezed shut, but I knew where I was as soon as we hit the mattress. Hunter’s body covered mine. God, he smelled good, amazing. Leather and musk and dark spices. His hands went to the sides of my face, into my hair. I forced my eyes open, so I could look at him. He was staring down at me, gaze moving over my face. He brushed my tears away gently, and I couldn’t look away from him. The strong lines of his hard, stubbled jaw, that crooked nose his father had broken when he was just a kid—that sensual mouth.

“I moved your things in here,” he said. “I want you with me from now on.”

“I want that, too.” There was no point denying it or fighting it. This is where I wanted to be. I kept telling myself I was going to leave, that I could walk away, but I was full of shit. I couldn’t. Maybe that made me weak, but there was no other option for me than here with him. Anything else was unacceptable. He wouldn’t let his job, the danger it involved, touch us. He wouldn’t. I had to believe that.

All he’d done for me, for Josh—he hadn’t said it, but he didn’t need to. He loved me—us. He’d shown me in every way possible. He didn’t need to say the words out loud.

His mouth quirked up on one side. “You done crying?”

“I think so.”

“You’re not sure?”

“It depends.”

His smile got a little bigger. “On what?”

“Whether or not you do any more sweet things.” I ran my hand over his muscled back, then down farther and under the soft fabric to his smooth heated skin. “I’m not a crier, but I swear I haven’t cried this much since . . .” I let the rest of the sentence trail off when a memory flashed through my head, of exactly when I cried this much. It wasn’t a good one.

His jaw went hard.

I slid my fingers over his whiskers. “Don’t.”

His eyes were locked on mine, hot and intense, scary intense. “I already said it, but I’ll say it again because I know you’re not letting yourself believe this yet. You, me, Josh, we’re a family.”

“Hunter . . .”

“Which means, I’m Josh’s dad.”

“Hunter . . .” I needed him to stop, or I would start bawling all over again.

“It also means you’re my woman, and I’m your man.”

“Please . . .”

“And I want you naked, in my bed, under me every night, those new fucking sexy curves you got now, pressed against my side. I wanna wake up beside you every morning. Eat breakfast with you every day. Watch movies with you on the couch, then make you come and hold you when you fall asleep after. Then, Lulu, I wanna wake up in the morning and start all over again.”

I sucked a breath in through my nose.

“Are you getting it?”

Yeah, I was starting to get it. My heart was pounding. My throat had a lump in it I had no hope of swallowing, and I felt a fresh batch of tears stinging my eyes. But I held them back with the sheer power of my will.

I also had serious heat building between my legs.

“Lulu?”

“Y-yes,” I forced out past the lump.

“That also means, when we’re alone like this and we’re talking, you don’t censor what you say to me. You don’t keep shit locked inside. You want this family as much as me?”

There was only one answer to that question. But I didn’t know if I could give him everything he wanted from me, if I could let the ugly inside, out. Still, I said, “Yes.”

Relief moved through his hard features, then warmth. “Good.” Then the warmth turned to all-out molten heat. He ran his nose along my jaw. “Now kiss me.”

I tilted my head back and his mouth came down on mine, soft at first, lazy strokes of his lips and tongue. His hands were still at the sides of my face, thumbs moving over my cheeks, along my jaw. His mouth followed, trailing kisses across my neck to my ear.

“I love the way you taste,” he rasped. “So fucking good, Lulu.”

He lifted his hips slightly, moved a hand down my side to my thigh, and untangled our legs, spreading mine so I cradled his hips. He sank back down, and I felt the hard length of his erection hot between my legs through the layers of denim. He took my mouth again as he ground his hips against me. I moaned into his mouth, rocking into it.

His tongue slid past my lips, delving deep, until all I could think about was him. All I could smell and taste was Hunter. His hand was on my ass and my heart pounded as he moved it to the front, tugging on the button then sliding down the zipper.

I was nervous and extremely turned on; afraid I’d let him down and desperate to have him inside me, all at the same time.

He broke the kiss and lifted his head. “Babe, I can feel your heart pounding.” He was breathing heavily, the bulge in his jeans huge. “You want me to slow down?”

“No.” I shook my head. “Don’t stop.”

He watched me carefully as he gripped the sides of my jeans and slid them down my legs. Pulling off my Converse and socks, he flung them aside, and then dragged my jeans off. I let out a shuddery breath when he stared down at me, squirmed when he ran a finger along my slit through the bright blue lace underwear I wore.

“I like these. Shit, they’re so sexy.” He slid his hands from my knees to my inner thighs. “I’m gonna taste you now. I need my mouth on you again. Didn’t get enough in the bathroom that day. Been rubbing off thinking about your beautiful pussy, all slick and pink after I made you come with my tongue.”

A pulse started up, deep and achy between my thighs. He gripped the sides of my panties and slid them down my legs, dropping them on the floor then spread my legs wide. I started to tremble.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Lulu.” That’s all he said before he leaned in, kissing the inside of my thigh. He licked and sucked the sensitive skin, then his mouth opened over me and he sucked on my overheated flesh.

I cried out, hand going to the back of his head, fingers fisting his hair. He dragged his tongue through my slick folds, big delicious licks that had my back arching off the mattress.

“Sweetest fucking pussy,” he growled against me.

Then he got serious. Using his thumbs, he spread me open and got busy with his tongue. One of those wicked thumbs moved, coming into play, massaging my clit. My senses went into overload, fingers tightening in his hair, hips thrusting up against his mouth. He held me still with his wide shoulders and forearms, something I barely registered, so focused on the pleasure he was building between my legs.

My orgasm came hard and fast, hitting me with little warning. I tried to close my legs, thrashing and moaning through it. Hunter kept me open with his shoulders, exposed, so all I could do was take it. Take it while he licked and sucked me, growling the whole time.

The hungry sounds he made just turned me on more.

His mouth moved to my inner thigh, and he kissed me there before lifting up. His eyes were hot and a little wild when he stared down at me. Reaching back, he pulled his shirt off, exposing his ripped chest and abs, his biceps flexing as he dragged the shirt across his mouth and flung it aside. He leaned back in and his hands went to the bottom of my shirt. He shoved it up and off, followed by my bra.

Under his intense scrutiny, my hands came up to cover my breasts. My body had changed a lot during our time apart. Even though he’d seen me naked before tonight, and had seemed to like the way I looked now, I was self-conscious. For once, I didn’t have my grief or fear to hide behind. I felt exposed in a way I hadn’t for a long time.

The heat in his eyes changed, now edged with something else, something that said he wasn’t happy. “Why are you covering yourself?”

“I . . .” Shit. I glanced away.

His hand moved to my jaw and he made me look at him. “Tell me.”

“Hunter . . .”

“Now, Lulu.”

“I . . .”

“Now.”

“I have stretch marks,” I blurted.

He frowned. “What?”

“My body, it’s not the same. I have stretch marks from carrying Josh, from breastfeeding.”

“And?” he said in a low voice.

“Well . . . I . . .”

His jaw was clenching again. “You think I give a fuck about stretch marks?”

“Um . . . well . . .”

“That there is one part of you that I don’t find fucking sexy? I’ve had a constant hard-on since I saw you again. Your new curves . . . fuck, I’ve had blue balls for the last couple of weeks, woman. I couldn’t give a fuck about stretch marks.”

“Oh.” That’s all I had. The man had a habit of saying things that left me speechless.

He pulled my hands away, and looked down at me as he slid his palm up to my breast, massaging my stiff nipple, fingers tightening, making me gasp. “Don’t ever be ashamed of your body.” He traced one of the marks with the tip of his finger. “You got these marks feeding our son, growing him inside you. Fuck, Lulu.” His voice turned, deep, fierce. “Don’t ever be ashamed of that. Especially with me.”

Then he was kissing me, and all that fierceness was poured into it. I wrapped my arms around his back, fingers digging into the muscle, into his smooth inked skin. The kiss went wild, out of control, and those big hands moved over my naked body in a way that shut down any doubts about the way he saw me.

One minute he was on me, the next he was off the bed, toeing off his boots and socks. His hands dropped to the button of his jeans. I watched him pop it open and slide down the zipper. He shoved the jeans and his boxer briefs to the floor, and his cock sprang free. I didn’t have much chance to take him all in, because he was back over me before I could suck in a breath. His thighs shoved in between mine, and he thrust his hips, dragging that beautiful dick through the center of me. The broad underside of his cock rubbed relentlessly over my sensitive clit.

“Gonna fuck you now,” he rasped into my ear.

I wanted him so bad I couldn’t think straight.

“You on the pill?”

“Yes.”

I barely got the word out of my mouth before he tilted his hips back and pushed inside me in one smooth stroke. I arched back in surprise, which forced him deeper as I moaned helplessly.

He hissed. “Jesus, so fucking good.”

Then he started moving, hard cock sliding in and out of my body, hitting me deep every time he thrust home. I kept my arms tight around him as he pounded into me, his deep grunts ringing in my ears, his body covering me, surrounding me. I felt another orgasm building even as panic started to slither unwanted through my veins.

I squeezed my eyes closed, trying to block it out, trying to go somewhere else as memories assaulted me. I hated myself for it, for feeling this way. This was Hunter, the love of my life, and I was on the verge of freaking out completely.

I was so deep in myself, it took me a second to realize he’d stopped moving.

“Lulu?” He cupped my jaw. “Look at me.”

I inwardly cringed when I blinked my eyes open.

“Shit.”

He started to move away, but I hung on, squeezed tighter. “Don’t. Please don’t stop.”

He cursed again, not angry with me, but with himself. It was written all over his face. “You’re not ready for this. I pushed too hard, too fast. Fuck, I’m sorry, baby.”

“No . . . No.” I dug my fingers into his skin. “Please, I want this, you have no idea how much.” I pressed my forehead against his chest. “Please. Don’t let him take this from us as well.”

Hunter stilled, lifting up so he could see my face. “You sure?”

“Yes.” And I was. I’d never been surer about anything in my life.

His arms tightened around me and he flipped us so he was on his back, me draped over his body. “Then ride me.” His hands came up to cover my breasts, thumbs brushing my nipples, making me shiver. God, so good.

I rose, gripped his cock, and came down on it, taking all of him deep. My head dropped back, a moan escaping.

“Look at me, babe. Don’t take your eyes off me.” One hand stayed on my breast, the other going between my legs. He pressed his thumb down on my clit, rubbing it in little circles.

I undulated my hips against his, taking him even deeper. “Don’t stop,” I panted as I rose up, keeping my eyes locked on his when I slid back down.

“That’s it, sweetheart. Fuck me. Give it to me.”

His words sent me up in flames and I started moving faster, harder. Hunter let go of my breast and gripped my hip, pulling me down hard as he thrust up, meeting me half way, slamming our bodies together.

He talked to me the whole time, making me stay focused on him, his voice all I could hear as he encouraged me, praised me, made me feel like the sexiest, most beautiful woman in the world with the rasped, sweet, and dirty things he said.

My panted breaths turned to gasping sobs as my orgasm built, my movements becoming erratic.

“Let me feel it, sweetheart. Let me feel that pussy clamp around my cock.”

Holy shit.

Hunter seemed to swell bigger inside me, his body straining, every muscle hard and ripped to perfection, skin slick with sweat.

“Oh God,” I moaned. Then I was coming. My vision blurred, blood pounding through my skull, exquisite pleasure radiating out from between my legs, making me shake as I screamed Hunter’s name.

I fell forward, burying my face against his throat as the aftershocks moved though me. One of his hands slid up behind my neck, the other low on my back. He held me there, thrusting up, hard. Once. Twice. Then he groaned low and long into my hair. I felt his cock pulse inside me, jets of come filling me, setting off some crazy good tingles. I couldn’t help it, I ground down against him, and then I was coming again.

Hunter tightened his hold around me as I whimpered through it, doing more of that delicious growling.

I’d barely caught my breath when I was flipped to my back. Hunter leaned over the side of the bed, coming back with his T-shirt. He used it between my legs, cleaning me off and then threw it into the hamper. When he was done, he pulled my back into his front, arms tight around me, and, cupping my breast, buried his face in my hair.

He kissed the back of my neck.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered.

He tensed. “What for?”

“For freaking out on you.”

He lifted up on his elbow and rolled me to my back. “I should’ve known you’d have triggers. We’re gonna need to talk about those, yeah?”

“Yeah,” I whispered.

“And if you feel it happening again, you tell me. You don’t like what I’m doing, I’ll stop.” He brushed my hair back from my face. “All right?”

“Yes.”

“You don’t like being pinned down?”

I shook my head. “I kind of knew, but wasn’t sure . . . until tonight.” I turned away. “Since the last time . . . it happened. Besides you, I’ve only been with one other guy . . . a one-off. It was ugly and quick, in a bathroom stall at a club. In the dark, I tried to convince myself it was you. But it wasn’t, and I freaked, scared the guy half to death. I guess I just wanted to lose myself for a while. I just ended up hating myself more.”

“Fuck, Lulu.” His voice was strained as he slid his fingers along my jaw, making me look at him again. “We’ll work through it, baby, together, okay?”

“Okay.”

He lay down and tucked me back into his front. Despite the conversation, I felt relaxed, sated.

I settled back into Hunter’s warmth, threaded my fingers with his, and closed my eyes.

I dreamed of Hunter making pancakes with Josh.