Cheri woke with a start when she heard someone rushing around in her house. “Wh-what? Thomas?” she whispered, dazed and confused as she felt the empty spot in the bed next to her. “What’s going on?” she scolded as she flipped on the lights, blinding them both. “You scared the heck outta me. Are you late for work or something?”
Thomas adeptly avoided eye contact and held his tongue, neither of which were like him at all.
Cheri trembled inside, with that same familiar fear she knew all too well, that quake that overtook her when she realized her lover was hiding something. “Thomas, what’s going on?” she demanded.
“Let me get dressed, and then I’ll explain,” he answered.
Cheri couldn’t help but sulk away; his serious tone told her everything she needed to know, that she was not going to want to hear what he had to say.
Thomas pulled a chair up to the bed, and the thought that he didn’t even want to sit next to her almost made her want to cry. He was shirtless, and his bronze, perfectly cut chest looked amazing against the blue of his jeans, which made his distance all the harder to bear.
“This was a mistake,” he blurted, then raked his fingers through his long hair as if trying to gather his thoughts.
“Oh shit,” she said, almost ready to throw up, as that was the last thing she expected to hear. She touched the back of her hand to her forehead, as if she was going to swoon and pass out like one of those frail Southern belles in an old movie.
“No,” he said, grabbing her firmly, “don’t misunderstand me.” He paused again to collect himself, clearly struggling to find the right words. “You and I are both fragile, Cheri, and we need to take things very, very slowly. I know I need to show you more than just tell you that I regret what I did. Take it from someone who knows. You might feel pretty good right now after we…did that and after you’ve gone cold turkey, but you’re about to experience ups and downs like you cannot imagine. Detox is no joke, and after all the drinking you’ve done it might even be good for you to visit a doctor for a checkup.”
Cheri was overwhelmed with emotion. She had just woken up, yet she felt exhausted, completely drained from her night of passion and from all the mental and emotional Olympics she’d been through over the past twenty-four hours. As much as it hurt, she knew that what he said made a lot of sense, but she certainly didn’t want to accept it.
“Do you understand what I’m saying?” he asked, stroking her arm lovingly, with a very light touch.
“Yes, and I’m glad to know you don’t plan to ditch me again,” she said, offering him a sheepish half-smile.
“I won’t ditch you, baby, but for now you need a friend more than a lover,” he wisely surmised.
Cheri turned her head, not wanting to cry in front of him in spite of all the tears she’d already cried before he walked back in her life.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, not quite sure why she seemed so upset.
“It’s just hard to hear you’re not my man. It was hard to know you weren’t my man when—”
Thomas turned her chin with his index finger and wiped away a tear with his thumb. “I will always be your man, for as long as you’ll have me, but we definitely have to start over, at the beginning. We both have things to work on,” he said.
She laughed softly.
“What’s so funny?” he asked, sounding a little vulnerable.
“Well, we both know you’re really the fuck-up in this relationship,” she said affectionately, “yet you always end up being the wiser one.”
He pressed his lips to her forehead and cupped her face. Their chemistry surged through her as he lingered, restoring and grounding her as only he could.
“Are you going to stay for breakfast?” she asked finally, hoping it didn’t sound too desperate or needy. She knew she wanted him to be her man, knew she needed him like crazy, but she was also keenly aware that he was right. We have to work on trust, she told herself, but surely we can work on some more of those buttery scrambled eggs first.
“I should stop by the house before I go in to work,” he said. “Maybe you can come over tonight, and we can go over your books.”
“I was thinking I should reach out to my boss and let her know what’s been going on with me,” she said. “There could be a chance they’ll take me back.”
“You can try,” he said, “but…”
“But what, Thomas?” she asked, arching a brow.
“You can’t undo it. Sit on it for a day. If it’s really a good idea, it still will be tomorrow. Maybe this is a chance for a fresh start for you, to consider what it is you want from a job,” he suggested.
“I just want an income that’ll help me replace some of the life savings I kind of blew…er, uh, drank through,” she admitted sadly. “I think if I come clean about my drinking problem, they’ll—”
He put a finger to her lips and, even though she knew he was just gently interrupting her, the effect went straight to her core. Any touch from him was such a turn-on, no matter how somber or sleepy she felt. She nearly melted when he said in that baritone voice of his, the one that felt as sweet and enticing as hot fudge on an ice cream sundae, “Just put it on the back burner to simmer a while.”
“But I…” she said, then began sobbing again.
Thomas shook his head. “I should’ve stepped in sooner,” he remarked, looking down at the floor. “If I had, maybe you wouldn’t be without a job.”
“Nope,” she said abruptly. “It wasn’t all your fault. I turned to the bottle to solve my problems. Let’s call a truce, a clean slate, and let’s try not to regret the past.”
When he lifted his head and looked at her, he was smiling. “See? I’m not the only wise one here. I definitely like that rule,” he said, “but what I was trying to say is that because you’ve turned over a new leaf… Well, they might not see it that way. Besides, did you even like your old job? Seems to me you couldn’t wait to be free from it.”
“It’s what I know how to do,” she said.
“Well, what would happen if you dared to dream? I’m thinking this might be a blessing in disguise,” he said. “Do a little soul-searching. Map out what you want out of life if you could have it.” He kissed her on the forehead. “See ya later,” he said. “I’ll take a rain-check on breakfast.”