Sleeping with Monsters by Hutchins, Amelia (3)

Chapter 23

My eyelids cracked open as debilitating pain erupted in my entire body as consciousness slowly came back. I groaned as the pain ripped through me. My face ached to the point that I almost gave in to the icy claws that fought to pull back to unconsciousness. I peeked around as best as I could, considering my head felt as if it was weighted down.

I’d been brought to a cottage, one that was covered in a fine layer of dust. There was a picture of an older couple displayed on the wall above a crackling fire that burned in the hearth. Candles fed the room light while the sound of something hitting something else pulled my attention to the dark corner of the room.

I blinked painfully as I inspected cards being flicked into a pail. The man’s features were obstructed as the shadows in the room continued, even though he knew I was waking. I felt my body for anything broken or missing, and breathed a sigh of relief when I noted I wasn’t chained to the bed or missing anything.

The wreck replayed in my head. The few seconds it had taken for the car to lose control and flip end over end jolted me fully to awareness. The shadowy figures that had fought right outside the doors became clearer now that I wasn’t in shock from the pain. Demons had attacked me, throwing those weird energy bolts at me. Lucian had been there. I’d watched him as the smell of gas had made me nauseous. There’d been more demons present than I could count and he and his men had moved them away from the car, away from the gas that spilled onto the highway and away from me.

Someone had grabbed me, pulling me from the wreckage as the gas continued to spread into the roadway. Moments, that’s how long it took for it all to happen. The male had saved me from the wreckage, cradling me delicately as he backed away from those fighting in front of the car—and then it happened. Another blue burst of light hit the car and it exploded as the world shifted, and then darkness claimed me. I’d succumbed to the lure of blissful sleep.

I tried to force my limbs to work, to move enough to sit up in bed to face whoever it was that lingered in the shadows of the room, watching me.

“Lenny, stop it before you hurt yourself,” Joshua’s voice filled the room, and a sob exploded from my swollen lips.

“I died,” I mumbled. “This is heaven.” I blinked backed tears as he moved closer, his blue gaze holding mine as he shook his head. I started to smile but it hurt too much, and then I winced as I realized that there was pain in heaven.

“You didn’t die,” he announced softly, ruining my delusion. “You almost died, but I got you out of there.”

“Demons,” I whispered, unable to say much through the pain.

“Yeah, demons,” he nodded slowly, sitting on the bed I lay upon, and looked down at me. “You look like shit.”

I snorted and then groaned from the subtle movement. He shook his tawny head and produced a coin from his pocket, moving it between his fingers with skilled precision. I stared at it sadly as it made its way through his fingers as if he was performing a magic trick.

“That bad?” I asked thickly.

“Worse, don’t think the fucking airbag in the car worked,” he admitted. “I used magic to heal the worst of it, but not even magic would undo it all. Your boyfriend was late getting to you,” he growled as he turned towards me. “If I hadn’t been tracking that pack of demons, you’d be dead right now.”

My heart wrenched as I put it together at who this was: Benjamin. Joshua was dead, and his twin was here, saving my ass instead. It was just salt to the injury at this point. Spokane hadn’t been infested with demons as our town was, but then in the larger cities, it would be harder to notice the chaos too. It seemed as if only our world, here in the quiet oasis of the Colville Forest, was the epicenter for everything going wrong.

“Benjamin,” I murmured as a tear slid down my cheek.

“There it is, that utter disappointment when you remember I’m not Joshua,” he said without cynicism and only a hint of disappointment. “I’ve never intended to hurt you, Lenny girl. Maybe someday you’ll love me as you did him, yeah? Maybe if I save your ass enough,” he scoffed as he stood up.

“Why did you save me?” I asked, unsure if he’d done it because we were related, or if he had a more sinister reason for it.

“I couldn’t get close to you until now,” he explained with a shrug of his wide shoulders. “Lucian made damn sure of that. You know he’s not what you think he is, right? Tell me you’re smart enough to figure that out.”

“I know that,” I mumbled as my eyelids grew heavy. “How long have I been here?” I inquired offhandedly.

“Two days, you’ve been out of it for two days.”

“He’ll find us,” I mumbled as I closed my eyes.

“Why, because he marked you?” he asked. “I placed wards to prevent that from happening. No one knows where you are, little Lenny. This is my father’s cabin; it’s heavily warded and hidden in the mountains. I had to take measures to be sure we were alone.”

“Why?” I whimpered as I adjusted in the bed, sending pain rocketing through my body.

Benjamin stood, moving the pillow to help me get comfortable. He leaned over and kissed my forehead with a feather soft kiss before he pulled back. “Because there are things you have to know, and things you’ll have to do if you want to save the people you love. There’s more happening than you can see or even begin to understand, Lenny. No one is safe from it, not anymore. Right now, you need to sleep and heal, because you’ll need your strength for what I need to tell you.”

I didn’t fight him, mostly because I couldn’t. He was right; I had to heal because the pain was intense, and it overwhelmed my need for anything else right now.

When I awoke the next time, it was to sun beating in from the open windows. Music played outside, and it took a few moments to acclimate and remind myself where I was and who I was with. I slowly sat up and brought my legs over the edge of the bed. I stood, checking my balance as I righted myself and stretched, then moaned as my arms protested.

I limped into the tiny bathroom and stared at my battered face in the mirror. Even after days, it was purple and blue, with ugly red bruises covering most of it. I touched my cheek, where the ugliest bruise had formed with some crude form of stitches he’d used where the skin had torn. Benjamin was right; I looked like hell.

I eased my needs and used my finger with some toothpaste I found before heading out of the bathroom. I followed the sound of music outside and found Benjamin leaning over the engine of a sports car, something Joshua used to do a lot before we’d lost him. I leaned against the door and observed as he tightened things, then checked the oil and whatnot before turning to look at me.

We didn’t say anything, just stared at each other until the silence got awkward and I stepped closer. I leaned over the engine as he slowly began to check things again. I didn’t know what he intended to tell me, or why he’d assumed Lucian had prevented him from getting to me, but he had a lot of explaining to do.

“I guess I should start with the day you lost your memories?” he asked, tossing an oil rag aside as he gazed at me.

“Probably,” I replied.

“You guys were being attacked, but there wasn’t shit I could do about it,” he said softly as he pulled a coin from his pocket and began moving it through his fingers. “I watched them being locked into the abbey, but there were too many demons to try and intervene. It wasn’t until you were brought there that I planned to try to get you out, but he wouldn’t leave you more than a few minutes and the other creatures surrounded you once the Fae had used his magic to get you to sleep. I heard you screaming and everything inside of me screamed with you, and then you just stopped. I tried to get away from them, but he sent them to find me. Lucian wanted to know what I was doing there. He held me for a few days, questioning me until he decided I wasn’t worth the effort before releasing me in the middle of the mountains in Montana.

“Took a while to get back here, but when I did, I knew why. They were saying it had been an explosion. I knew different. Then I watched you, noticed you weren’t yourself at all. I couldn’t get close to you, and then I knew why. They’d made you think you were Kendra, and I knew she was where Lucifer took her to. He knew I’d tell you the truth. Guess that’s why he left me in the mountains, to buy himself time.”

“I figured out that much on my own,” I stated as I wiped my hands off onto my bloody jeans. I examined my ripped up clothing and then my arms, which were bruised.

“Yeah, I didn’t have anything here that would fit you.” He shrugged. “Pretty sure that would have been hard to explain as well.”

“It’s fine,” I said as he moved towards the house. Moving was painful, but after seeing my face, I knew why. I limped back inside, following his stiff back until he pulled out a chair at the small round table. “Your dad lived here?” I asked.

I’d never met their dad, and hadn’t heard much about him other than that my mother had once loved him. I’d always assumed we had the same one until my mother had told us otherwise, which I was sure he’d explain soon enough.

“We all have the same father, Magdalena,” he grumbled. “Your father is Drake as well, she just couldn’t tell you or the others. Why do you think this cabin is so close to your house? Your father, the one they said was yours, isn’t,” he explained gently, watching me as I absorbed the news. “They were in love, up until he split, anyway. I found his journals when I found this place again. I discovered things, tons of things I wish to hell I didn’t know. Things that will change everything you ever thought was true or right. What I tell you won’t be easy to believe, but I will prove it to you,” he said as he pushed his fingers through his hair. “All of it.”

A shiver rushed down my spine, knowing that he wasn’t lying. I swallowed slowly and nodded. “Tell me.”

Chapter 24

I told Benjamin to drop me off a mile or so away from the abbey so he didn’t have to deal with the coven, but also because everything he’d told me was rushing through my mind. He’d had proof of everything he had told me, and it made sense. Everything that had been happening, and everything we knew was still to come…it all fell into place.

That meant my entire life had been a lie, and everyone I loved had lied to me. The things we’d been taught were all wrong, and the consequences, well, everyone would suffer for them. I stepped over branches, hating that every move I made ached. The pain had lessened, but everything I did hurt. Walking probably hadn’t been one of my more genius ideas, but had Benjamin come with me, he’d have been an unwilling guest to the abbey.

I cleared the thick brush and stood on the edge of the woods, watching as Lucian and his men argued with the coven. He didn’t look happy, but neither did my grandmother. Bags were being handed to his men, which were then loaded into waiting busses.

I surveyed the abbey, noting the black char marks that had created cracks in the walls. The doors were hanging from the hinges. I slowly moved forward as women and children were moved from the abbey into the waiting busses.

My heart leapt to my throat as I took in my mother’s face, as battered and bruised as my own. I rushed forward, hearing my name muttered or whispered as I approached those who continually handed off items.

“Lena,” my mother uttered, dropping the bags she held as she rushed to me. “Oh, Lena, you’re alive,” she cried as she wrapped her arms around me and a sob exploded from her. She held me as if she feared I would disappear. I cried out in pain but she ignored it, holding me tightly.

“What happened here?” I asked, but she said nothing as giant sobs rocked her body as she held me even tighter.

“The abbey was attacked last night. The runes and wards failed,” Grandma said as she placed a hand on my shoulder. “Are you okay?” she murmured worriedly, taking in the battered bruises from the wreck.

“It looks worse than it is,” I lied. “How did they get through the runes and wards?” I demanded.

“We don’t know, but they did. We lost a child; he was taken in the attack and we were unable to follow them. A few witches were killed as well in the initial onslaught. We wanted to follow them to bring the child back. We couldn’t chance leaving the abbey unguarded, though, or sending people to chase the demons.”

“So no one went after them at all?” I questioned, but even as I asked it, I knew. It had been bedlam, they’d been under attack, and more lives would have been placed in jeopardy if they had. “Nevermind, it doesn’t matter right now,” I amended as I stared off into the crowd of people who were lining up to get on the busses. Kendra stood at the back of the line, watching me with curiosity.

She didn’t rush over, happy that I was alive. Instead, she looked guarded, unhappy I’d turned up at all. “You’re sure no one removed the runes?” I asked, eying her suspiciously and then cursing myself for doing it.

“Lucifer was with them,” my grandmother admitted. “He couldn’t pass through them, and yet his demons did so with ease.”

I turned to look at her but paused as an angry obsidian gaze met mine. He’d said nothing, and yet I’d felt his gaze scorching my skin the entire time. No matter how hard I tried to ignore it, I couldn’t.

“What did he demand?” I asked carefully.

“You; he said nothing about Kendra, only that he’d never stop until he got you,” she murmured for my ears alone, and yet I knew Lucian heard her. “We can no longer take chances, Lena. Lucian has offered to house us in his club until we can find other arrangements. The abbey cannot withstand another attack, not while it’s failing from within. The damage is too much for us to handle with our limited resources.”

“Failing from within?” I asked softly.

What the hell had happened in the little time I’d been away?

“The heat is no longer working, and without having prepared for winter, there’s no wood to feed the smaller fireplaces. The boiler went down two nights ago without warning and it needs parts we cannot easily find. Winter is so close that we cannot chance it.”

“We can collect wood,” I argued. “There are trees everywhere that have been down long enough that they are dried and easily brought in to burn.”

“There’s no time, and sending people out to collect it is dangerous and unneeded,” she scoffed. “Lucian has enough room to hold us, as well as the other witches who were already heading to the abbey. We will be safer with him and his people.”

“We don’t know whose side they are on!” I growled angrily, uncaring that he listened as I challenged his loyalty.

“I’m on whichever side Lucifer isn’t,” he said smoothly. “It’s already been settled while you were gone. Tell me, Lena, where were you while the abbey was being attacked?”

“Surviving,” I snapped as I turned to face him. His gaze slid over my body, slowly lifting back up to my battered and bruised face. “Is the abbey cleared?” I asked over my shoulder, where my grandmother observed our argument in silence.

“It is, you should pack,” she suggested as a sadness I couldn’t fathom or deserved crossed her features. “Is anything broken? The car had little left of it when Lucian had it brought to us. We feared the worst had happened.”

“No, I’m fine,” I said as Lucian’s jaw ticked at the mention of the word. “I have to grab my things.”

“Lena, take Lucian with you. The rooms have yet to be cleared, but everything was moved to the front of the abbey, minus your belongings, by Lucian’s men. We didn’t know if you had been taken or if you hadn’t…”

“Died,” I said it for her. “I almost did.” I laughed soundlessly. I ignored Lucian as I entered the abbey, taking in the damage that had been done. The inside looked like a war zone, with black burn marks everywhere. My guess would be it was the same energy like bombs that had hit the car, sending it flipping out of control.

I continued deep into the abbey until my arm was grabbed and I was pushed up against the wall. Onyx eyes stared down at me as I glared up.

“Where the fuck have you been?” he demanded.

“That is none of your business anymore, now is it?” I snorted as I examined the tick in his jaw hammer wildly.

“It is when I scoured Hell to find you,” he warned.

“And why would you do that?” I asked, hating that his touch sent my heart beating wildly against my chest as my stomach did little somersaults.

“You fucking disappeared, and both Spyder and I felt no connection to you. That doesn’t happen, so fucking elaborate on where the fuck you were hiding and who you were with, now,” he growled.

“I don’t have to answer to you,” I said as I pushed him away from me. I didn’t leave the wall; it was supporting my weight and I felt weakened with having walked as far as I had already.

“You don’t want to push me right now, Lena,” he cautioned. “I have your entire coven on its way to my club and I only offered them protection, nothing else. You want them to starve; you keep your fucking secrets.”

“You wouldn’t do that,” I uttered hesitantly. He would. He held all the cards and he knew it.

“Try me, Lena,” he presaged as he stepped closer, forcing me to lift my head to keep eye contact. “I’ve told you before: I’m not a nice guy. I get what I want, and right now that’s answers to where the fuck you were and who you were with. If that means leaving those busses full of your coven here, I’ll do it in a heartbeat.”

“You’re an asshole,” I grinded out between clenched teeth.

“That’s not the answer I asked for,” he seethed as he lowered his mouth to my ear, inhaling my scent as his hands boxed me in. “Someone hid you from me, and I want to know who it was and how they blocked us from locating you.”

“Jealous much?” I asked softly as his lips hovered inches from mine.

“I don’t get jealous,” he laughed coldly. “I get evil, so tell me what I want to know or go tell your coven to get the fuck off my busses.”

I stared at him, unsure what to tell him. The truth put Benjamin on his radar, but the other left us exposed and without a way to protect ourselves. The abbey was in tatters, unable to be defended against an attack from Lucian if he showed up again.

“Benjamin; he pulled me from the car before it blew up,” I whispered as his angry glare narrowed at the discovery. “He mended my wounds until I woke up. I don’t know how he blocked you, or why he did. If he hadn’t pulled me out, I’d be dead.”

“And what did he have to tell you, sweet Lena?” he muttered.

“Nothing I already didn’t know about you,” I growled thickly. “He warned me that you were dangerous, that you’d break me into tiny fucking pieces, but he’s a little late to stop that from happening.”

“Get your things,” he said, pulling away from me as I was left shivering without his heat. “You shouldn’t have left the abbey, but you seem incapable of listening to advice.”

“It’s not advice when it comes in the form of a demand,” I muttered as I swayed on my feet, pushing from the wall.

“You’re not healed,” he growled as he pulled me against his side. “Which room is yours?” he asked, already walking towards it.

“You already know which is mine,” I grated out as I rolled my eyes. He knew which one I’d slept in, either by scent or however he knew everything he did. There seemed to be little he didn’t know or wasn’t aware of anymore.

Once we were inside my room I collected my things as Luna, the little traitor, jumped into Lucian’s arms and immediately began purring. I pulled out my bags and filled them with the things I needed before grabbing for the picture of my family we’d taken before Joshua had gone off to war.

With my clothing packed, I opened the drawer and pulled out the small message that had been wrapped and hidden in Luna’s collar. I pushed it into my bag and paused looking down, eying my bloodied and torn clothing, then sighed.

“I need to change,” I said sternly, hoping he’d take the hint and leave.

“So change,” he smirked roguishly.

“I don’t suppose if I asked you to turn around, you would?” I asked.

He grinned and I frowned deeper as I turned around, giving him my back as I pulled out a pair of joggers and a tank top. I carefully pulled my hair into a loose ponytail and set the clothes beside me before I started to peel off the pants. I winced and groaned as I slid them down, ignoring the gasp as Lucian took in the rest of my bruises. I didn’t turn around as I felt him closing the distance between us.

“Bloody fucking hell, Lena, you’re lucky to be alive,” he growled angrily.

“I’m fine, Blackstone,” I repeated. I slipped the panties down and reached for the new ones, only to feel his mouth as it kissed my hip where the worst of the bruises were. I stiffened as I tried to ignore the urge to cave and allow him to continue. “Stop,” I warned, looking at him as his gaze held mine from where his mouth was inches away from my pussy. He didn’t force the issue. Instead, his angry stare took in the other bruises as I lifted my shirt and gave up trying to hide myself from him. Propriety and Lucian didn’t even belong in the same sentence.

He stood up, staring at the bruises covering my naked chest as I slowly pulled on a top. I knew I was fucked up; I felt it even though Benjamin had done his best to heal the inside of my body. The outside was only getting worse. The bruises were a mix of reds and blues, and I looked as if I’d been thrown around for fun by a giant.

“They won’t get to you inside my club,” he murmured as he pulled me close to him, uncaring that I didn’t want his pity or attention. His arms cradled me like I was made of glass as he placed a soft kiss against my temple. “If you don’t stop taking chances with your life, I will chain you to a fucking bed and keep you there until this ends, or he is dead.”

“I’m not yours to protect, and isn’t that why we’re here in the first place?” I asked, stepping back from his embrace. “Because you fucked me,” I laughed coldly. “Maybe we should stop doing that, since it ends up getting me hurt in the long run.”

“Get your stuff, we’re leaving now,” he growled.

“I have to grab some things from the library,” I stated firmly as his lips quirked into a seductive smile.

“It’s being brought with us, along with a few other things your grandmother requested. If you’re good, I may let you read some of it.”

“You think you have me right where you want me, don’t you?” I mumbled.

“And where is that?”

“At your mercy,” I murmured as I stepped closer to him.

“Oh, Lena, I don’t have any fucking mercy.”

Chapter 25

We stood in line waiting for rooms as Lucian stood mere feet away from me, issuing orders. They were removing items from rooms as each person who waited in line was sent to them. I knew what kinky shit they were removing from those rooms. However, no one else seemed to have a clue what the holdup was. Every once in a while, my gaze would drift to Lucian, who wore a pair of faded, ripped up jeans and a regular T-shirt, something you didn’t often see him dressed in. It was a welcome change from the suits he wore.

“Your face is seriously killing me,” Kat announced as she slid back into line, handing me a bottle of water. “I think it’s gotten worse since we got here.”

“Thanks, I had no idea,” I deadpanned as I forced my gaze away from the muscles rippling beneath Lucian’s shirt and eyed her with a look of utter disgust. “I wouldn’t have guessed it unless you had pointed it out so delicately.”

“I’m not going to lie to you, you seriously look like you bounced your face off the floor,” she replied flatly. “The guys coming in are all looking at you and it’s not because you’re hot. More because you look like roadkill,” Kat rambled as she did a double take of a group of guys who were passing us.

I’d noticed a ton of witches flowing into the club since we’d arrived. Lucian apparently had a much longer reach than my grandma, because the ones she’d reached out to had shown up less than twenty minutes after we had, and there hadn’t been many of them.

I still had to confront them about what I’d discovered. But between the pain and my wounds coming back as if the accident had just happened moment’s ago, I’d decided to wait. I wasn’t up to it, not with my insides twisting from red hot pain that was making it difficult to remain standing in this never-ending line, let alone dealing with a difficult confrontation.

I leaned over to see how many more people were in front of us and started to fall, only to have a stranger catch me.

“Wow, sweetheart,” he murmured as he took in my face with a wince. “You okay?” he asked smoothly. He had dirty blond hair, vivid green eyes, and a smirk that bespoke of sin.

“I’m good,” I muttered in embarrassment.

“This is Lena,” Kat piped up as she helped me back up against the wall for much-needed support. “Normally she’s not such a klutz, but gravity is kicking her ass today. I’m Kat, and you would be?” she asked as she extended her hand and grinned like an idiot.

“Falcon, Falcon Sutton,” he announced as he accepted her outstretched hand and placed a kiss against the back of it. “I look forward to seeing you ladies around.”

“As do we,” she giggled, and I rolled my eyes as his green ones lingered on me longer than I liked.

I would have watched him walk away, but turning my head hurt more than it would have been worth. I did, however, find Lucian glaring at me as he took in my battered face. I dropped my head back against the wall, closing my eyelids as I tried to ignore the burning pain growing inside of me.

“I think he noticed your face,” Kat mumbled in warning.

“Who?” I wondered out loud, but didn’t have long to wait to figure it out.

One minute I was against the wall, ignoring the world, and the next I was being dragged from the line. I opened my eyes, a shocked cry exploding from my lips as the subtle movement sent pain spiraling through my entire body.

“Stop,” I cried out, noting he did as I asked. Everyone stared at us, and tears rolled down my cheek as the pain became overwhelming. Whatever Benjamin had been trying to do to heal me had failed. I was steadily getting worse with every tick of the minute hand that went by. Lucian’s midnight irises ate away at mine and then slowly lifted above my head to where the line of witches watched us.

“You’re coming with me; either walk or I will carry you. Choose, Lena,” he demanded softly. “You’re getting worse; whatever your brother attempted to use to heal you is failing, and I don’t give a shit if you want my help, you’re getting it. So start walking or I’ll put you over my shoulder and carry you.”

“Lead the way,” I mumbled as I slowly stepped closer to him, wincing as pain enveloped me. I followed him until we reached a hallway without witnesses and then leaned against the wall, unable to go any further. It had taken everything I had in me not to fall on my face as we’d left the club’s main room. “Blackstone,” I called out when he’d continued walking without a sign of stopping.

He spun around and eyed my weak ass as I started to slide down the wall, unable to even hold myself against it.

“Bloody hell,” he growled as he hefted me up into his arms, cradling my body against his chest as we moved through the hallway. “You should have said something.”

“I’m not your problem,” I stated, hating that I had to be carried, but unable to stop myself from inhaling his masculine scent greedily as my nose touched his neck. My eyelashes fluttered as I gave in to the security he made me feel. I wasn’t afraid of him, I was afraid to be alone with him. Something about this man made me need him, want him.

I craved his touch and scent. As if my soul was attached to his by an invisible thread, and we’d been tied together. No matter how much I ignored it, fate kept shoving us together in one way or another.

“Is that what you think? I told you from the start, little witch,” he purred smoothly, “you’re mine, and I don’t care what you say about it. It doesn’t matter if I am fucking you, I claimed you. It can’t and will not be undone, not even by you. You’re mine to protect, and you’re safe here. Let those walls down, Lena, and let me inside to help you.”

“Those walls? I put them there to protect me from being hurt,” I laughed soundlessly as I opened my heavy eyelids to find him watching my response. “I let them down with you last time and you fucked me, so don’t expect me to make that mistake again. What you did shouldn’t have happened. Not after I let you in and trusted you, only for you to wreck me at the first chance you got. I’m not some stupid girl who falls for the same mistake twice, Lucian,” I whispered as I tried to keep my eyes open.

“You’re not stupid, but you’re already craving what I can give you. You’re pissed, so be pissed at me. I couldn’t care less if you like me, Lena, as long as you know that you’re mine. You were mine from the moment I saw you outside your house staring at it like you were lost in memories. The moment our lips touched, you were a goner whether you wanted to be or not. You want to know why Lucifer wants you. Because you are the first woman I’ve laid claim to in centuries. So fucking hate me if it makes you feel better, but know this: if you touch another man, he dies. I won’t fuck around when it comes to you. I did what I did to protect you. I couldn’t lose you, and if that ends with you hating me, fine. At least I know I did what I could to save you. I’m not the guy who gives a shit if fucked up things happen to people, but I cared if it happened to you.”

He kicked a door and I cried out as it sent a wave of fresh pain running through me. His words shook me, and yet I couldn’t ignore what I now knew. He’d taken my tattoos, my memories of us. He’d made me think I was going insane, and worse, he’d fucked me beneath the moon and I remembered everything. I’d kidnapped him, and he’d allowed me to and for a moment, he’d let me come back to him only to push me away again. The things he’d said and done had all come back with a vengeance that had torn me apart inside, leaving me more broken than anything he could have done to me.

The man turned me inside out and watched me fade away as he’d maintained his selfish choices. He’d come here with a goal, one that I didn’t fit into, or maybe I did and neither of us had known it.

I hesitated as he sat me down inside his bedroom. My vision moved to the bed, the very one he’d claimed me in as his men had watched us. It took effort to tear them away from it and to stare at him as he moved to the other side of it, punching a code into the wall.

He stepped back as the wide doors swung open, revealing a secondary room which had been hidden behind the paneling. I wondered how many more secrets this club of his held. Many, would be my guess; he was full of secrets.

“Get your ass in here,” he growled when I continued to sit on the bed, hesitating on whether I should ask to go back to the line, or follow his lead. Lucian had healed me before, a few times. Whatever Benjamin had done was coming undone quickly, and that scared me. I had no idea how bad my injuries from the wreck had been when he’d taken me.

I moved, albeit slowly as I followed him into the room. There was a huge tub in the room. One big enough to fit a few people if they wanted to sit closely which, considering where I was, may or may not have happened a time or two.

“Have you…” I started to ask the question and paused. What, Lena? Ask if he’s fucked other women in it. Hey, Lucian, have you happened to have had an orgy in your tub? You know, just checking and stuff? Brilliant.

“Used it with other women?” he snickered as he turned those midnight orbs of seduction in my direction. “Jealous of them?”

“Envious,” I shot back, and then faltered. Maybe I’d sustained brain damage in the accident.

He laughed huskily and shook his head. “Take your clothes off and get in,” he murmured as he turned his back on me and started withdrawing items from drawers. I didn’t strip as instructed. Instead, I observed him as he worked, staring at his reflection in the mirror. The moment his eyes lifted to mine, I twirled around with a guilty flush that crept up to my ears.

I started to undo my joggers and then stood upright, grasping on to the wall as my head swam with dizziness. I felt Lucian’s hands touching me as he gently pulled on my shirt, allowing me to lean back against him for support as he removed it. His fingers slid over my hips, pushing the panties down until they were around my ankles. I didn’t face him, knowing I’d be entirely too close to him if I did. Once he’d helped remove my clothing, I continued to face away from him as his heat comforted my battered skin.

After a few moments, I stepped away from him, touching the cool wall with my forehead as I felt him putting distance between us. The sound of the water being turned on soothed the ache I felt at needing him to touch me. This man, this dark ethereal creature undid me. He unraveled me until I was laid bare to his midnight gaze. He hadn’t just broken down my walls; he’d taken a wrecking ball to them and obliterated them without me even realizing he’d done it.

I swung my head in his direction, hesitating to move as he did his best to ignore me. I waited until the water had reached halfway before I walked around it and slipped into the watery depths. I sighed deeply as it soothed the aches of the outside wounds. I didn’t bother with modesty; he’d already seen me naked more times than I could count. I slid my legs flat and rested my head against the smooth edge of the tub.

I stared at Lucian’s back as he lit candles and placed them around the room until it looked as if it was being set for seduction. Once he’d finished lighting them, he dropped what looked like bath bombs into the water and silently went back to the counter. They fuzzed, sending a multitude of tiny bubbles exploding into the heated tub. The moment it spread across my skin, it numbed it.

“What is in them?” I asked, letting my fingers move through the bubbles.

“Salts from Switzerland, rosemary, peppermint, and my blood,” he announced as he spun around and tossed some flower petals in.

“Your blood?” I asked, coming out of the water a little as I stared at the fizzing balls. The petals changed the color of the water as I watched. He pulled off his shirt, which drew my attention to him as he slowly tossed it aside and knelt beside the tub facing me. His smoldering stare ate up the sight of my naked form and then held mine in open challenge, as if I’d try to expel myself from the tub.

“You’ve had other parts of me inside of you, and yet you recoil from the idea of my blood upon your skin? Need I remind you that when I claimed you, you drank it?” he whispered thickly as he whispered something in another language that caused the candles to leap higher, sending more light into the room.

“Lucian,” I murmured as my body responded, not caring that it was covered in angry bruises or that my insides were bruised as well.

“Don’t worry, Lena. Not even I am asshole enough to force this when you’re injured and covered in bruises I didn’t put there. These should help you heal rather quickly, though.”

“What do they do?” I whispered, ignoring his hooded gaze as his fingers trailed through the pink-hued water that I sat in.

“The water will heal the outside,” he replied carefully, his stare moved from my body to gaze at me. “I’m sorry, Lena,” he murmured.

“For what?” I asked, unsure I wanted his apology when I was exposed as I was.

“For this,” he said, moving faster than I could respond. I was pushed beneath the water without warning. My response was to scream, opening my mouth as I inhaled water into my lungs. My hands grabbed for his arms, scratching him as I struggled to get out from the watery grave he intended to put me in. When that failed, I grasped for the side of the tub, coming up to gasp as water secreted from my mouth as I coughed and sputtered, only for him to climb in atop me and push me back under.

My lungs were on fire, filling with water. He straddled me, holding me under as I stared at him in horror. I’d trusted him and he was going to murder me with my entire coven just out of reach to help me. My arms grew heavy, and my mind started to shut down when he pulled me out. I grasped for him, wrapping my arms around him as I sputtered and expelled water from my stomach, heaving it out as my body trembled from shock.

“You’re okay,” he mumbled as he pushed the hair away from my face. I glared at him, pushing him away from me and then shoving him into the water as I held him down. He smiled back up at me through the murky depths as if it wasn’t even bothering him. He stayed there, gazing up at me as no bubbles escaped from between his lips.

“What the ever-loving fuck,” I uttered as I dipped my head to the water and, before I knew my intentions, I’d placed my lips flush against his and kissed him. He came up, wrapping his arms around me as he deepened the kiss and encircled me with his arms, holding me close against his naked chest.

My hands slowly slid up his back and buried into his hair, threading through it as I held him to me. We were unnatural to want this…this crazy thing that was happening between us. He was the storm out on the ocean, dangerous and deadly, and I was the idiot in the boat who danced upon those deadly waves, sailing the treacherous sea in chase of the adrenaline rush only he could give me.

He lifted us up and my senses came rushing back as our lips parted. He allowed me to slide from his body until my feet touched the smooth surface of the tub. He pushed me down and I didn’t argue, didn’t complain as he followed me back into the tub still wearing his pants. He reached for a bottle of shampoo and turned me until my back was against his chest.

“How’s the pain?” he asked gutturally.

“It’s…gone,” I murmured as I struggled to ignore the appendage I felt in his jeans. “You got in the bath in jeans?”

“You want me to remove them?” he asked, and I shook my head. “Didn’t think so,” he laughed softly.

“You healed me,” I pointed out.

“Yes,” he responded carefully. “Don’t ask it,” he started when my lips parted to do just that. “You’re not ready for that, and I am barely holding back the urge to tear you from this tub and bend you over that counter. Now, shut up and let me wash your hair, little witch.”

He washed it with strong fingers, massaging my scalp as I rested against him as he’d instructed. It was too intimate. The setting was everything a girl could dream up. Candlelight flickered in the dark bathroom and I gazed up, wondering when the lights had gone out or how I’d missed it when they did. Roses mixed with other types of flower petals as they danced on the water’s surface around my knees. His hands were magic as he washed my hair with something that smelled divine. I actually let loose a moan as he continued to massage it, sending pleasure racing from my head to my toes.

“Did you have to push me beneath the water?” I muttered as I rested my head against him as I peered up into his onyx depths.

“Would you have allowed it otherwise?” he asked deeply, his deep baritone voice rumbling against my skin. I shook my head, giving him my answer as I watched him lower his lips and place a gentle kiss against them. I swallowed as tears swam in my vision. I could handle anger. I could handle the hate that burned through me. I couldn’t handle this. Not this nice shit, this gentleness from him, not when I wanted to remain angry at him. I lifted my head, moving my mouth away from him as he pulled down another bottle. “Magic is touchy when you use blood. My blood heals; you’re no longer bruised or bleeding inside. Unlike Benjamin’s clumsy attempt to heal you with white magic, I used the magic of my blood. You’ll be fully recovered in the morning, but until then, you’ll sleep with me.”

“That’s not happening,” I argued as he finished washing my hair and I faced him.

“It wasn’t a question,” he growled. “Blood magic has a price, Lena, one that I won’t allow you to pay, so you will sleep in my bed,” he purred silkily. “You will be the first woman to ever sleep in it without getting fucked, so shut up, get dressed or don’t. That one is up to you but I warn you, sweet girl, I’m hanging by a fucking thread and it’s about to snap without being able to take what I want. Lucifer is still out there, and he’s made it known he wants you. Every fucking demon is itching to get to you to fall into favor with him. So no, you’re not sleeping alone tonight or any other fucking night, not even claimed.

“He’s lost his fucking mind in his need for revenge, and I promised you that I would protect you. I don’t break my fucking promises. I won’t force you to be with me, but I didn’t go through months of hell keeping my distance to lose you now. I’ve had Luna and your things brought to my room, so get changed. Seeing you naked is driving me bugfuck crazy and I’m a sinner, and you’re no fucking saint. Us naked, beautiful girl? We’re explosive, and I crave you like a drug addict on a fucking bender in need of a fix. Go get dressed, now.”

I stood up, ignoring him as his hungry gaze trailed down my body, following the rivulets of water. I stepped from the tub, eyeing the mirror as I took in the lack of bruises, leaving behind only the crude stitches.

“I’ll remove them when you’re dressed and my cock stops aching,” he hissed from the tub, where he remained seated. “Clothes, Lena.” I grabbed a towel as I darted to the bedroom.

Inside the room, I dressed in a gown and crawled beneath the covers, waiting for Lucian. Luna jumped onto the bed, scaring me as she fried my already frayed nerves. I petted her thick, midnight coat and tried to ignore Lucian as he sauntered into the room with only a thick white towel wrapped around his narrow hips. He moved to the cupboard and withdrew a pair of sweats. I observed quietly as he tossed the towel aside and then faced me.

He clucked his tongue and Luna jumped up, mewling as she slunk her traitorous ass over to the edge of the bed before jumping into his waiting arms. He cradled her as he moved to the closet once more, withdrawing a huge velvet bed and setting it in the chair that sat at the end of the bed. She jumped into it, lying down as she started grooming her paws. He deftly moved around the room, putting out water and the expensive as shit cat food.

“Goodnight, Luna,” he purred as she watched him move to the bed.

“Thank you,” I whispered hoarsely.

“For what?”

“For taking care of her,” I replied. “When I found her she’d been abandoned. She was scared of her own shadow and covered in fleas. I nursed her back to life, and she’s been with me since. You’ve spoiled her rotten, though, and I’m not sure she’ll want to go with me now.” I laughed as Luna mewled in agreement.

“Do you have any idea how hard it was keeping her from her mother? Anytime you walked in she went crazy. No amount of expensive cat food will replace you in her life. You’re her mother, and I don’t think you realize that you were never alone. The coven watched you; they protected you even when you didn’t know they were. No witch is ever alone in this world. You’re all bonded until death, and sometimes not even death can break that bond.”

I watched as he pulled the blankets apart before sliding beneath them. His body rippled with masculine power, muscles moved with sinewy perfection as he reached for me. I didn’t fight him, instead letting him pull me close as he whispered words that turned off the lights. In the darkness, I prayed to Hecate.

I prayed for the strength to do what was needed when the time came. I prayed that he wasn’t what Benjamin said he was, because if he was, I’d fallen in love with a monster from the depths of Hell.

Chapter 26

The next few days were a blur of activity as more covens showed up, everything moving faster than I could keep up with. Some had come from as far as New Mexico to find protection with our coven. Each was known to us, which at least made it easier to accept them into the fold.

I’d steered clear of most of them, ignoring Lucian as well until bedtime. The latter wasn’t as easy since anytime he entered a room, my stomach did a summersault, and my heart sped up a little faster even without seeing him.

Tonight I was hunting my mother and grandmother down for a conversation I could no longer wait to have with them. Our family had secrets, the kind of secrets that left everything upside down and inside out.

Moving through the club’s main room, I slowed my pace as I watched Kendra approach Lucian. Her hand touched his shoulder and she giggled as she pulled it back, tucking her hair behind her ear as she spoke to him. I stood there, dumbfounded as she laughed at something he said and then pointed to a booth close to them. Lucian nodded and together they walked to it then slid into the seat on the same side.

Kendra smiled, leaning her shoulder entirely too close to Lucian as she lifted her lips to his ear, whispering into it. I felt my anger rising as if I had a right to be angry over her getting that close to him, but I didn’t. Hadn’t I pushed him away? My question was: If she’d been battered by Lucifer using Lucian’s image, wouldn’t she be hesitant or uncomfortable speaking to him? Instead, she looked like she was flirting, and he didn’t look immune to it, either. She was flirting with him with my face! Of course he wouldn’t be immune to it, she was me. He could easily go with her and just toss me aside because we were literally the same make and model.

I was so absorbed in observing them that I hadn’t heard Spyder come up beside me. He pushed me into the corner and laughed throatily as I gasped in shock.

“Jealous, kitty?” he inquired softly as his thumb captured my chin, lifting my gaze from Lucian and Kendra to meet his instead. I pursed my lips together and began to feed him the riot act when he shook his head. “She isn’t you,” he purred huskily. “He wants your fire, you burn red hot. She’s ice-fucking-cold and boring. Don’t do that jealousy bullshit. You’re better than that. Now run along before more people see you glaring daggers at your twin image.”

“I’m not jealous,” I lied. I totally was. The pain in my heart ached, and my stomach twirled with a new emotion I hadn’t felt in a very long time. Not since my ex had fucked Cassidy on my own bed.

“Liar, it’s written in your eyes and the stiffness of your spine. You’re pissed,” he argued.

“She was taken by Lucifer, and he was projecting Lucian’s image, yet she’s okay with whispering into his ear as her hand strokes his?”

Spyder paused as his stare turned to look at Lucian and Kendra. Exactly! She seemed cozy with him, and she shouldn’t. Not after what she’d endured. Hell, she barely spoke to me more than to order me about. Lately she’d asked me to take her places, places that we had no business being at. Shit, I’d barely managed to call Benjamin and warn him that she’d suggested we go investigate a cottage close to our house where an enemy may have hidden before the demons had been released.

She’d changed, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t connect with her. I’d tried to use the mental link—shit, I’d screamed at her through it for hours last night as I lay awake next to Lucian. Nothing, radio silence on her end. Not even the sight of Lucian’s bare chest distracted me as my mind replayed everything she’d been up to since she’d returned.

“Has she been different since she returned?” he asked, forcing my mind to focus on him. I wouldn’t betray her, not when whatever was going on with her was my fault.

“No, just forget it. I have to find my grandmother,” I replied as I moved away from him.

“Does she have a devil’s trap on her, Magdalena?” he asked as he grabbed my arm, preventing my escape.

“We all do, even Luna has one,” I admitted.

“You tattooed our Luna?” he asked, and I zeroed my gaze on him. Our Luna?

“According to what Alden told my mother, not even animals are immune to being possessed,” I retorted. “Furthermore, she’s mine and it’s my responsibility to protect her.”

“Calm your tits, kitty. Your grandmother is holding her court in the dungeon, with the other elders. I did supply whips and chains so if anyone steps out of line, I’m sure Sarah can handle them easily.”

I smirked as the mental image played through my mind. “That’s just wrong on so many levels that I’m not even sure where to start, Spyder,” I laughed.

“There it is,” he said as he reached up and pushed a stray piece of hair behind my ear. “They should be done soon, and if he doesn’t see through her shit, it will be his own fault, and then you and I? We’ll play cat and mouse a bit,” he laughed as he teased but the heat in his eyes said a totally different story.

I looked away from him to where Lucian had been watching us together. The look in his angry glare told me he wasn’t happy about it, so I did the only thing I could to let him know I didn’t care. I stood on my tiptoes, kissing Spyder on the lips before I moved away, leaving him with a dumbfounded look and Lucian with a clear message.

I’d made it to the end of the bar area before Lucian appeared in front of me, and I tilted my head a bit, knowing he hadn’t gotten here by walking.

“What the fuck was that?” he demanded.

“You tell me,” I demanded back, crossing my arms as I glared up at him.

“You fucking kissed him,” he growled.

“I gave him a peck on the lips,” I replied easily, as if Spyder’s lips hadn’t affected me any.

“You want to explain why the fuck you did it?” he asked icily, his jaw ticking wildly.

“You want to tell me what my sister whispered into your ear?” I countered angrily.

He smiled and grabbed my arm, pulling me into the hallway that led out of sight. Lucian pushed me against the wall and kissed me, hard. When he pulled away, he growled long and hard as he stared down at me.

“You can keep acting like you don’t want me, but you need me,” he whispered hoarsely.

“No, Lucian. The difference is I never needed you. I wanted you, and there’s a huge difference between the two. I wanted you with every fiber of my being and you fucking broke me, like I was some sort of promise you decided not to keep. Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? I feel worthless, like I wasn’t worth the chance you’d have taken to trust me to follow your lead. And now, now you’re all cozy as a stripper and a dollar bill with my sister. And you get mad when I kiss someone else you forced to claim me? Why are we here right now? Whose choices led us here? Because it sure as shit wasn’t mine. Mine would have been by your side, unwaveringly following you into the depths of Hell if you’d asked. So guess what, if I kiss someone else? You deal with it, because I didn’t push you away, you fucking threw me away like your unwanted trash.”

“I would never throw you away, Lena. I saved your foolhardy life, and right now you’re making it very hard not to slam you against that wall and prove it to you. You think I want Kendra? I assure you, you couldn’t be further from the truth. She’s even colder than she was before, and my feelings for you didn’t change one fucking iota when you thought you were her. Staying away from you was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do, and trust me, I’ve done a lot of hard things in my lifetime, but none of them affected me as you have. So throw your fucking fit and get the fuck over it, because you and me? We’re far from done. You want me and I want you, and that’s all that should fucking matter right now. People outside are dying and you’re too pissed off to see past your anger to grab what is right in front of you,” he seethed as he boxed me against the wall. “There’s not another woman that roams this world or any other who I want more than you.”

I swallowed as I closed my eyes against the angry tears. “Then why didn’t you let me choose? Why did you take away pieces of me?” I uttered painfully.

“Because you would have run right to Lucifer in your pain to get her back, and I couldn’t allow that. You think we weren’t being watched? You think he didn’t have fucking minions up here watching me? I made them keep you away from me until I was sure the glamour we’d cloaked you in had worked on the demons. Once I knew, I made them send you to me every fucking chance I got, every fucking excuse to see you I took. Life isn’t fucking black and white, Magdalena, wake the fuck up and get past it. Be pissed, but get the fuck over it.”

“You think it’s that easy?” I demanded angrily. “You erased my brother, and then you went even further and you erased my tattoos, which meant something to me. They were proof I’d survived something, and you obliterated it from my past like it was written in fucking sharpie. I was falling for you and then you played God in my world; you didn’t trust me and that hurts the most. You made me into something I’m not, and now you expect me to just go back to the girl I was before. Why? Because your world didn’t change? Mine has been shaken from its foundation and left in a pile of fucking rubble to rebuild alone. You burned my world down, and in the same breath, you didn’t let the flames touch me, but in the end, you were the flames that burned me the most. You protected me and let someone I love take the fall. She’ll never be the same, and neither will I.”

Footsteps sounded down the hall and Lucian took a step away from me as we watched my grandmother and mother converge on our location. I turned my head from them, wiping away the tears before I walked in their direction.

“I need to speak to you, both of you. Now,” I announced.

“Is everything all right?” my mother questioned.

“We need to talk about Drake,” I growled.

My mother’s blue eyes grew rounded as she moved hers between me and my grandmother. She knew that I knew she’d lied to me from birth. My grandmother asked Lucian for a room and he directed us to one, which I entered silently. Once the door had closed, I rounded on my mother and stared at her shaken pallor.

“You need to explain why you would withhold it from the coven and us,” I snapped.

“Drake was a born dark witch,” my grandmother answered for her sternly. “It was forbidden by the coven. We weren’t aware of it when they first got together; he was awakened by the ancestors, or so we had assumed. He used dark magic to make a deal with a witch; in exchange, he was given a mate of pure blood. He got Fiona. We were unaware of what he was, or what he’d done at the time. They conceived the boys on that very night. They fell in love, Lena. You and I both know the heart doesn’t care what is wrong or right. It goes after what it wants no matter what the brain says otherwise.

“We didn’t know what had happened until it was too late, and even then, they were in love. When Benjamin turned dark, it was too late to drive the darkness out of him. Drake took him to the cottage for a while, hid him from the others. I myself took them food and supplies. Months later, I watched Joshua as your mother snuck up to see him, to tell him it was time to go away from here, as the others had begun to notice his presence, or lack of. Your mother became pregnant that very night as they said their goodbyes. That was why, on summer solstice every year, we took you girls to the seer in the woods. You were both protected from the darkness. So, when Drake and Benjamin disappeared, we vowed to find her another mate immediately and claim he sired you and Kendra.”

“You could have told us,” I whispered through the thickening in my throat. “What if we’d changed? What if we’d formed a darkness inside of us and had to hide it to remain here?” I asked.

“Then we’d have handled you as well,” my grandmother answered coldly. “No witch can be born of darkness without being evil. It’s written from the beginning of the tales of witches, Lena. Those born to darkness will destroy us all. They cannot fight the evil within their veins and souls for more than a few years, but as children it’s worse. They are the truest form of evil, and why the humans have tales of evil witches from the dawn of man. Understand this: Benjamin should have been drowned to purify and release his soul, yet we didn’t have the strength to do it. So we let him live, and not a day has gone by that we have not wondered what kind of monster we allowed to live. He is of our bloodline, which means he is very powerful, and with his father driving him, there’s no telling what he has done.”

“You think he unleashed the demons on us?” I asked in disbelief.

“Who else would have done this?” my mother finally asked.

“Benjamin is mortal,” I announced. “Mortals do not hold enough power or magic to unleash Hell on earth. He didn’t do this. He is darkness, but he is not what you think. He pulled me from the wreckage and did his best to keep me alive. He allowed me to leave without any argument.”

“But not before he filled you with discord. He told you who your father was, and he probably told you a million other lies. Of course he let you go, Lena. He made sure you were questioning things before he did so, didn’t he?”

“What he said to me made sense,” I replied. He’d shown me proof, which one of those things had already been proven to be correct.

“He isn’t what you think, granddaughter,” my grandmother whispered. “He’s tried to turn you against us, do not let him win this fight. He showed up right before the gates opened and allowed a few more demons out, and now again as the gates have failed. That is a truth as well. Now, tomorrow we will hold a dance for the new witches and ours to become united in a cause worth fighting for. You will be in attendance, and you will cease leaving this place, do you understand?”

“But I—”

“Enough!” she shouted and glared at me. “I’ve been patient with you, Lena. It ends here. You are not to leave here anymore. You will stop forcing Kendra to join you and taking her from the safety of this place in her condition. It’s not safe for either of you out there.”

“I didn’t want to leave, she did!” I snapped, and both regarded at me as if I was losing it.

“Kendra reported less than an hour ago that you forced her to leave here three times. I was also told that you were just witnessed in the club glaring at her as Lucian showed her attention and then we find you and him together, arguing. If you continue, you will be confined to the room you are staying in.”

“Yes ma’am,” I said, spinning on my heel as I exited the room. That bitch set me up! Maybe she didn’t have a devil’s trap on her body, because this shit? This shit was low, and no matter what had happened, I didn’t deserve it from her.

I made my way through the heavily crowded club, full of witches. Once I’d taken a seat at the bar, Spyder pulled up the stool next to me and glared at me. He rapped his knuckles on the bar and I smirked as I gave him my attention.

“You want to explain what the fuck that was?” he demanded as the bartender approached. I shook my head as I gave Vlad a small smile.

“Get me drunk,” I said as Vlad gave me a lopsided smile.

“Now why would a pretty girl like you want to get drunk?” he asked, pushing his long black hair away from his face as he watched me.

“Because I just kissed Spyder, got berated by the High Priestess, and because some people have lost their integrity,” I muttered as I stared him down in open challenge. “So get me a drink, please. Something strong,” I frowned as I turned back to Spyder, deepening the frown. He had a black eye, which wasn’t healing as fast as his other injuries had before. “Someone hit you?” I asked, wondering if I was misjudging it, or if the shadows were playing games on me.

“I ran into a fist,” he said before he swung his glare to Vlad. “Jack Daniels, on the rocks,” he grumbled as he turned to face the crowd. There was no music playing, which seemed off. Every time I’d been in here the music had been bumping.

I dismissed him, observing Vlad as he poured two fingers of Jack into the glasses and then pushed them in our direction. I took the cup and tipped it up, swallowing it in one gulp before I set it back down and pushed it back.

“More,” I said, ignoring the two sets of eyes that stared at me.

After the fourth, I slowed down and turned, taking in the witches who mingled or flirted. There were so many of them that I didn’t even know who was who anymore, or which coven they were from. My head swayed as I tipped the glass and swallowed deeply.

“You’re not going to drink it away, kitty,” Spyder said as he surveyed me with hooded eyes. “That pain of betrayal, it’s not going anywhere.”

“I wasn’t betrayed,” I stated, watching him as his lips tipped up, forming an alluring smile. “I never said anything about being betrayed.” What the fuck, did the walls have ears?

“You didn’t have to,” he laughed as Vlad nodded.

“Girl drinks like that, she’s either hiding something or she’s hurting. Sometimes, it’s both,” Vlad tossed in.

“What if the girl just wants to get drunk?” I pointed out defensively.

“Girls don’t get drunk without other girls,” Vlad countered.

“Then there are things like clothes coming off, hooting and hollering, and the fun starts. You’re not doing any of those things, and you’re drinking with me,” Spyder retorted as his forehead creased as he struggled not to laugh at the disgruntled look I gave him. “Go to bed, kitty. Before I end up with another black eye,” he warned.

“Fine,” I grumbled as I pulled out a few dollars and started counting change.

“I got this,” Spyder announced as he pushed the money back into my pocket and gave me a gentle push in the direction of the sleeping quarters.

“He shouldn’t have hit you,” I said.

“It was fucking worth it.”

“If you say so,” I muttered as I started to walk away from him.

“I say so.”

Chapter 27

I strode down the hallway, oblivious to everyone and anything happening around me as anger simmered to the front of my mind. I hadn’t wanted to leave the club or the security it offered, which was absolute. Lucian was a sure bet against Lucifer, and yet Kendra kept throwing it in my face that I owed her for what she’d endured for me.

The worst part was, I’d thought we had been making progress on fixing what we’d broken, but we hadn’t. The first chance she’d gotten, she’d thrown me under the bus. Kendra had forced me to go and then turned it around and made it look as if I had been the one pushing it. On top of that, she’d made a move on Lucian, which I knew I shouldn’t care about, but I did.

Watching them together had made me feel eviscerated, sickened to the point that I wanted to physically hurt her, my own flesh and blood. It shouldn’t ever be like that, and yet the red hot rage as her fingers traced Lucian’s hand had made my magic unfurl from deep inside of me. As if it wanted release to do harm, which white magic never did.

I slammed into something solid and stammered as I righted myself, holding onto what I had hit. Emerald green eyes watched me as I lifted mine to see what I’d run into.

“Whoa there, little lady,” he said with a soft laugh as he held me up. “Not that I mind being ran into by something like you, but you might want to pay attention when you’re walking,” he joked and I stepped back, away from him. His touch felt oily, as if he was tainted.

“Sorry,” I mumbled as I tried to sidestep him, only for him to block my way as I did so. “Problem?” I asked as I gave him a curious look.

“Weren’t you beat up the other day?” he asked as he slowly slid his gaze down my face to my breasts which were pushed up by the top I wore. “Damn, girl. You’re beautiful.”

“What was your name?” I asked as his smile faltered.

“Falcon,” he announced as he held out his hand. I accepted it, shaking it as I felt a spark ignite the moment we touched. It was nothing like the one when Lucian touched me; no desire unfurled or unraveled inside of me. It was something else, as if I knew him and yet I couldn’t place him anywhere before the day we’d all come to Club Chaos for sanctuary. “And you’re Magdalena Fitzgerald, in the flesh. You’ve caused quite the stir of chatter with your power in the community. One of the strongest witches in the bloodlines to date, or so some are saying.”

“Is that what they’re saying?” I asked, wondering why this guy’s vibes were giving me the creeps and hitting all of my alarm bells.

“And that you’re single and unmated,” he replied smoothly as he grinned impishly. “Tomorrow I hear we will have a mixer and your grandmother had made it known that she’d like you to be considered as a mate to those of us who hold power, real power,” he continued pointedly. “I plan to place my hand in that pool for a night with you, or longer.”

“She is telling people that?” I quizzed as I tilted my head.

“Seems she doesn’t much care for the one who you fucked, and would prefer you pick from your own species,” he replied with a hint of something in his tone.

“Species? I thought we were all human here,” I returned.

“Are we?” he countered as he bowed and walked away, leaving me to puzzle over his cryptic words.

Great; so my grandmother, who had begged Lucian to bring us here, was trying to hook me up with some magical dick. Kendra was carrying Lucifer’s child, and it was widely known. I was the last Fitzgerald available to carry on the line at the moment, until Kendra birthed whatever she was carrying.

My feet moved as I considered how to get out of my grandma’s scheme, which she hadn’t bothered to inform me of, when someone stepped out from around the next corner and blew something into my eyes. I coughed as my face burned with liquid fire.

Pain erupted as whatever it was continued to burn as my legs gave out and I hit the floor on all fours. I looked up, seeing Kendra with a male as they watched me. I tried to ask her what the hell was going on, but nothing came out other than a stifled sob.

I rolled to my side as pain burned through me, enveloping my mind until I felt it, a darkness rising inside of me. It fought to save me from whatever was happening to me. Voices began shattering from inside my head, and popping erupted in my ears as if I was rapidly rising in altitude. The voices grew louder, clearer, and then, as the darkness rescinded, so too did they. I lay there on the floor until the whispered voices became further and further away from me.

I pushed off of the ground, touching my face as I sat on my knees in the middle of the hall floor, blinking as my vision swam with the fading silhouettes of my attackers. I used the wall for support as I held myself up, leaning against it as I wiped at the filmy sand that they’d used on me. My hands came away clean and I swung my face towards the laughter that sounded from the end of the hallway.

“Kill them before they kill you,” a small voice whispered, and I looked around, peering down the hallway in both directions.

“She is safe from you,” a female’s voice ran out, echoing inside my head. I clapped my hands over my ears as my eyelids closed.

“We protect her!” another shouted, and I doubled over.

“Who will protect it from me? You cannot save them both,” a small voice whispered, and nausea swirled inside my stomach as they chanted.

“Stop!” I screamed and then listened as everything grew silent inside my head. Fucking hell, the grimoires I’d managed to hold silent were now active in my head? How? I’d bound them to be silent, to be unable to communicate, which was why I’d ignored Synthia’s warning. I wiped at my nose as something ran from it, drippling over my lip.

I stared at my hand as red flowed from my nose onto it. It flowed steadily, and with effort I managed to push from the wall and head in the direction of my room. My hands dropped as I swayed precariously on my feet, slowing as the wall gave way to another hallway. I stumbled, collapsing onto the floor, and began crawling.

When the wall was back, I grabbed on to it and made my way back to my feet before I heard footsteps approaching. I paused, unsure if I should bolt or if I even could. I turned towards the wall, resting my head against it. Slowly, I crumpled and hit the floor hard.

“Kitty, what the fuck?” Spyder’s deep baritone voice filled my ears, forcing me to clap my hands over my ears as his voice echoed inside my head, piercingly loud. I managed to rise again and leaned against the wall. I started to fall backwards, unable to hold myself upright, and felt his hands catching me before I could make it back to the floor. He hefted me up against his chest as he started walking. His hand moved and then he spoke. “We got a fucking problem, meet me in your room, now,” he ordered and then pushed his phone back into his pocket.

It took him seconds to reach the room I’d been stumbling so hard to reach. I was placed gently onto the bed, and he loomed above me. His blue gaze stared down into mine with a look of horror as he turned from me as the door opened.

“What the hell was so bloody important… Lena?” Lucian’s words trailed off as he took in the blood gushing from my nose continually. “What happened?” he demanded of Spyder, who shrugged and stepped back.

“I found her in the hall by following a trail of blood,” he said softly. “That’s a lot of fucking blood, and it isn’t stopping, Lucian.”

“A spell?” Lucian mused as I tried to move my head to look at him, only I couldn’t. My strength was waning, and even though I was on the bed, everything was spinning. “Get Vlad in here, now,” he demanded as he knelt beside me. “Hold on, Lena, I’ll fix this.”

Chapter 28

I awoke to someone touching my face. My eyelids felt weighted but I managed to pry them open. I stared up at a young man, who peered down at me with curiosity. I could feel that my nose had been packed, and Vlad sat beside me, an IV hooked into his arm as he stared at me, smirking.

“You had us worried, pretty girl,” Vlad explained.

“Why is there an IV attached from your arm to mine?” I mumbled through the cotton in my mouth. I sounded like shit. My nose had been packed with gauze, and everything sounded off. I brought my free hand up to my ear, finding it packed as well.

“You were bleeding from your nose, ears, and eyes when Spyder found you in the hallway,” Vlad murmured as his hand intertwined with mine, holding it still. I started to sit up only for the man who had loomed over me to push me back down.

“You’re not well,” he stated firmly. “We have yet to figure out what caused this to happen to you.”

“This is Eliran, a friend of mine, Lena. He’s skilled in healing and one of the most treasured healers of Faery. He saved you, let him do his job.”

“Faery?” I muttered at the man working around me. Unlike the others, he didn’t have the rings around his irises and he looked exhausted. According to legends, the Fae never aged and yet he looked exhausted, older than the others I’d encountered, including the ones I’d met here.

“Aye, from Faery,” he supplied as he grabbed my wrist and took my pulse. “She’s stable, but until we know what caused her to bleed so much, she should remain in bed.”

The door opened and we all turned to watch as Lucian, Spyder, Ryder, Synthia, and a ton of others poured through it. I swallowed as Synthia’s electric blue gaze searched mine. I’d discovered she could change them at will; either that, or they were triggered by her moods. I still hadn’t figured her out, or what she was yet.

“She’s awake and recovered?” Lucian asked Eliran and I snorted. “Lena, what the fuck happened?” he demanded as his body swung in my direction, changing course. He dismissed Eliran before he could even answer the question.

“I don’t remember,” I lied. “I was walking and then everything just went haywire.” I wasn’t throwing Kendra under the bus; I no longer trusted her, but until I knew why she’d done it, I would keep that tidbit to myself.

“You were leaking blood from every orifice on your face when Spyder found you. If he hadn’t discovered you when he had you’d be dead right now,” Lucian snapped angrily, as if he could force me to tell him what happened. “This happened inside my club, where I vowed you would be safe, Lena.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that I can’t remember anything happening,” I growled as I fought against Eliran to get up. After a few moments of struggling, Lucian traded him places and pulled me up carefully, allowing Vlad to adjust the flow of the blood he was so graciously donating.

I settled into Lucian’s body as I stared at where the thick blood disappeared into my vein. Eliran moved to his supplies, drawing my attention back to him and the silent room who watched as he brought a chest over to Vlad and set it down beside him. He withdrew the needle from his arm, softly placing a pad of gauze on his arm before he did the same to mine.

“Apply pressure for a few moments,” he ordered firmly as he slowly backed away and placed his hands behind his back, as he began to explain what he’d found. “As far as I can tell, she’s fine other than the loss of blood. She has no other symptoms that I can find, or any telltale signs of it being a spell. Whatever happened, it hadn’t been meant to kill her; harm her, yes. Murder, there’s no proof of; more to the point, it could have been a spell she did herself that went awry. My worry is, without knowing what caused it, or which spell was used, we cannot prevent it from reoccurring.”

“You think I did this to myself?” I asked, releasing the gauze as I pulled the others from my nose and ears. The room whirled with sounds the moment I did. I swallowed bile as it struck me on all fronts. The mixtures of smells were obnoxious, overwhelming as I brought my hand up to cover my nose. I could see a thousand times better; everything was brighter, more vivid and the Fae were even more beautiful. “What did you do to me?” I demanded softly as I turned to look at Vlad accusingly, and noted his silver eyes twirled in an intricate pattern that I’d never noticed before today. His skin was flawless, his hair a rich blackish-blue that caught the light and reflected both colors gorgeously.

“I’m a vampire, Lena. You received my blood,” he pointed out slowly as to not overwhelm me. “It heals faster than magic could have, and it will rebuild the cells you lost. You will, however, experience things how I do for a little while. My blood should be out of your system within a day or two as it recirculates and you build your own cells and replenish your normal blood volume.”

“You smell everyone like this? How do you manage it?” I asked.

“Ahh, there’s benefits to that one. Such as smelling a woman who is aroused,” he chuckled.

“Enough,” Lucian rumbled, and I slipped my hand into his, loving how it fit and hating it at the same time. “You don’t remember anything?” he asked sharply.

“I remember people walking down the hallway, and then someone said something but I didn’t catch what was being said. A few moments later pain exploded inside of me and I woke up on the floor, bleeding from my nose, with Spyder picking me up.”

“You didn’t see who it was who walked by you?” Spyder asked from the shadows and the entire room looked at him. I would never get used to him blending into the shadows, which seemed to caress him as a lover would. “You were screaming for them to shut up the entire time I carried you into the room. You were shouting even when you were unconscious, screaming for them to stop. No one was inside the room with us, and yet you held your ears and continued to beg them to stop screaming.”

“I don’t remember that,” I answered honestly.

“Are the grimoires inside of you speaking yet?” Synthia interjected into the conversation softly. “It’s been weeks, Lena. You should be dead by now, by all recounts of history. The only witch to last more than a few hours that we could find was a dark witch, one who had little to no information reported in our history.”

“You wouldn’t find a history of a dark witch in any records,” I admitted, knowing I was spilling information I should be guarding. “It’s forbidden to even speak of them once they have died, for fear they will return from the grave. Dark witches were never documented; their entire line was sometimes erased to hide the shame from a coven’s past doings. Dark witches are stronger, live longer, and are unnatural. It’s for that reason the covens forbid them to be a piece of any history to any coven. Your coven is different, but witches who allow the darkness inside of them and those born to it are different creatures. One is evil from birth, the other is by choice. In the end, no trace of them is to remain in our history. Like a blemish, you remove it.”

“And you, Lena, which one are you?” Synthia surprised me by asking.

“I use white magic; black witches are unable to cast such a thing,” I pointed out as Lucian’s arms tightened around me. “If I was a dark witch casting white magic, you would know. Everyone would know.”

“And why is that?” she asked.

“We would know,” Lucian agreed. “She would turn dark; thick lines of black poison would run through her veins, and her eyes would turn completely black with the darkness. It would consume her soul and devour any control she held. We would all know if Lena turned to the darkness, because she’d be unable to control it, even with how powerful she is. When a witch turns dark, it’s near impossible to hide it from anyone.”

“Then let’s pray she doesn’t succumb to the grimoires, because at least three of those names who once owned them traced back to tainted bloodlines. Everyone leaves a trail, Lena. No matter how hard you work to erase someone from history, there’s always something left behind.”

I stared at Synthia and struggled to swallow past the lump in my throat. “If I turn evil because of them, put me down,” I whispered, watching her flinch from my request. “I can’t be allowed to hurt the people I love. If I can control it, fine. If I can’t, you have to end it. Don’t make Lucian or Spyder do it. Promise me it; you’re trained to kill creatures. If I become evil, it means that I am no longer alive in this body. I will fight until my last breath to remain in control, but if I lose it, it means it eradicated me. No one should ever have to live with that. Lucian doesn’t deserve to have to endure it. My family won’t be able to, so I’m asking you to do it.”

“You are aware that they are not as they pretend to be,” she smirked as she sat on the bed and grabbed my hand. “Are you aware of what I am?” she asked carefully.

“Definitely not human and not Fae,” I answered softly. “Your eyes change color, and you’re married to him,” I pointed out with a nod of my head. “He’s the Horde King, eyes the color of freshly spun gold thread with the solar system captured in their ember depths. His wings are as soft as gossamer, and yet wield death with their aim, he is final death for mortal and Fae alike. I have heard the tales about him. But you, you are something else entirely. My gut says Goddess, and yet you wear the glamour of the Fae upon your face, which is curious. The others are easy. The last time you came, you left out what you’d become. You only said what you were.”

“You are very observant, that is a good thing. It bothers me, though, that you failed to see who did harm to you. Because it makes me think you’re protecting someone who tried to hurt you. If they tried to harm or kill you, are they really worth protecting? Unless it was blood? Your sister, perhaps,” she thought out loud as she stared at me for any telltale sign I was lying.

“Kendra wouldn’t do this to me,” I uttered.

“We are discussing the same sister who abandoned you when you snuck into the Guild nearly a week ago, right?” she asked, a saucy smirk filling her full lips.

“She is blood, but she’s also my twin. If it had been her, I would know it. We are connected, and unlike your coven, ours is united through more than just a vow. We are one; when one falls, we pick them up. When one strays, we bring them home.”

“And yet they left you in Portland,” Spyder pointed out with a hiss, and I frowned. I couldn’t argue that. But then I’d left on my own and I’d made sure they couldn’t follow me.

“She needs to rest. They will expect her to attend the soiree tomorrow,” Lucian growled as he pulled me closer as if he thought to protect me. “I would like to extend my thanks and ask that you stay close for the next few days as we discover who it was who tried to harm her. There are over a thousand witches inside this club at the moment. After tomorrow, a few selected will turn to darkness to protect their covens. As you are aware, it can turn deadly rather quickly and I have given my word that we will protect the white witches during the process. I would owe you a favor at your time of choosing,” he said carefully. I somehow knew him saying it was larger than he made it sound, as if owing anyone a favor bothered him greatly.

“We will stay, for the witches, of course. You will not owe us for it, Lucian, she will,” Synthia said, and Ryder, who had been observing us, snorted. “For the witches, and the ones we could not save of the Guild, I will do what I can to help your coven, Lena. You will owe me something in return, and I will vow that the Fae will protect your family and coven from any harm as the others turn to the darkness.”

I swallowed hard and nodded. “I accept.”

Chapter 29

I remained in my room for the rest of the night and long into the morning hours, refusing to see anyone except Spyder and Lucian. Both had stayed close to my side throughout that time. The voices had dulled to a whisper, but no matter how much I tried to ignore them, they never stopped speaking. I couldn’t make out their muted words, but if I tried to listen to them, they would go silent. It was as if they knew or felt that I was eavesdropping on their conversations going on inside my head.

Sitting on the edge of the tub, I placed my fingers into the water, testing it. I slowly dropped rose petals and bath salts Lucian had brought into the water. I listened as slow music played in the bedroom; knowing it was driving Spyder a little crazy brought a smile to my lips. Lucian was on witch duty, probably being driven insane by my grandmother and mother.

Letting the silk robe drop from my shoulders and pool at my feet, I stepped in. It took effort to shut out the world, along with the voices. Sometimes it sounded like static and other times it became constant chattering that made no sense. The spell I’d tried hadn’t worked, and I was out of options.

The more pages I flipped through, the less confident I became of which spells had once belonged to the dark witches or white witches. Had I accidently already cast a dark spell? It was possible, and what Synthia said could happen. I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to control what happened inside of me. I’d absorbed entire grimoires, and now I was faced with the cost of doing my actions.

I knew what was coming tomorrow, knew that I’d pushed for it, and maybe I’d been wrong to do it. Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned it, or lobbied for it. I was newly awakened and yet I’d run my mouth in affairs I shouldn’t have. What if my secrets came to light? What if the entire reason I’d fled the coven was revealed, or all my effort to hide it was undone? What if everything went wrong and it was all for nothing? Once you fully embraced the darkness, it couldn’t be undone. Death was the only release, which I knew more than anyone else. I’d battled it and won, and I’d paid for it. I’d won, but only because I’d found a way to lock it inside of me.

I sank fully beneath the water, staring up at the ceiling as I weighed the consequences of my actions. The voices got louder, as if they felt my uncertainty and fears. The voices that said the bad things inside my head, were they the dark witches? Was that what my friends and the others would become? I closed my eyes as I released air, slowly letting the fire in my lungs ignite until I rocketed out of the water, gasping for air.

Spyder stared at me as I gasped at him from where he stood against the wall, enshrouded in the darkest corner of the room. “Ah, kitty, that’s never the answer,” he murmured as he stepped forward.

“I wasn’t committing suicide, jerk,” I growled as I covered myself the best I could. “I worry about tomorrow. I pushed for this, Spyder. What if I was wrong?” I asked, and he smirked.

“Dark witches aren’t evil right away, and we’ll put them down if they step out of line tomorrow,” he assured me with a shrug, as if he didn’t even consider their lives worth anything. “Don’t you glare at me like that; I don’t want them to die either…Well, most of them, some are cocky little fucks who could probably use a little downtime. But if it’s between you and them, they’re fucked, kitty cat. Utterly fucking fucked.” He knelt down beside the tub and splashed me with a charming smile.

“I like you too, Spyder.”

“Finish up, and get dressed.” He shook his head as he rose from beside the tub. “We have a party to crash.”

Twenty minutes later, I stared at my reflection and the dress I’d decided to wear. One I’d conjured with magic, which flattered my slim frame. The maxi dress was a silky, almost sheer material that draped from each shoulder in a wide V-neck that exposed most of my chest and barely covered my breasts as it dipped dramatically just above my navel. The sides were similarly exposed under my arms. The only thing that kept the fabric from shifting like a wardrobe malfunction was a slender band of black fabric that supported my breasts and kept the sides and chest pieces from slipping.

My hair was loose, cascading down my back, as Lucian preferred it. I had minimal make-up on, preferring to look natural instead of made-up or fake. I’d never used much of it anyway. A little mascara, lip gloss, and cheek blush and I thought I looked good enough to face the world. Kendra would take hours in the bathroom for school, but I was the opposite. I missed her, the old one who used to smile from her eyes when our gazes locked across the room at some boring coven function.

I tossed the brush onto the counter and slipped into the small heels I’d made and headed into the bedroom. The moment I entered it, I heard Spyder’s sudden intake of breath and peeked up at him curiously. He stood motionless, his gaze roaming over the exposed skin before they closed and he took a big step backwards, as if he didn’t trust himself with me.

“The Gods are fucking fickle bastards,” he growled. “Five minutes; that’s the time between when he entered that party after you arrived and when I did. It was supposed to be me, but no, I had other obligations.”

“What are you talking about?” I asked as I lifted the skirt and stepped closer to him.

He exhaled and shook his head.

“It doesn’t matter,” he laughed silently as his chest shook but no sound escaped. “Let’s go crash the party, kitty,” he said as he extended his elbow. “You do know you’re probably going to get half the kids out there murdered tonight, right?”

“That’s not going to happen,” I laughed softly.

“You’re beautiful. So fucking beautiful it hurts to look at you tonight,” he mumbled as he rubbed his free hand down his face and stared straight ahead.

“Thank you, Spyder. You’re pretty fucking hot too,” I laughed as we entered the main hallway, picking up some burly-looking Fae, including the sapphire eyed one who had scared the crap out of me at the Guild. He smirked as he took in the dress.

“Poor fucker,” Zahruk mused before he pulled knives from their holsters on his legs and slipped them into his sleeves. I swallowed as a nervous flicker started to take hold of me. I could see the weapons he carried, the multitude of them, and yet he was protecting me against Kendra. I didn’t know why she’d done it, or if she knew what would happen when she did, but I knew I could no longer trust her and that broke me more than Lucian ever had.

As we got closer to the club’s main room, I could hear the noise level becoming unbearable mixing with the noise my head. Vlad’s blood kicked one hell of a punch that hadn’t released me yet, and everything was heightened; my senses, my reflexes, my body’s responses, everything.

The moment we reached the club’s main room, everything seemed to stop. The noisy chatter died down to a minimum as I entered the room, pausing on the edge of it. The assembly turned, staring at me as I stepped from the hallway, followed by the guards who flanked my sides.

My gaze searched the endless sea of faces until I found him. Lucian stood in the middle of the sea of people, staring up at me as I gazed back with a need so raw and red hot that it terrified me. I stood there, somehow managing not to fidget as his gaze swept down my scantily clad body. I found strength and courage in the heat that filled his endless depths.

I wasn’t the girl who wore such dresses, not the type that exposed this much skin. I was modest, never needing to show myself off as something I wasn’t, but I’d wanted to be special tonight. I was on display, but there was only one man who I wanted to catch. I’d chosen everything carefully, dressing for seduction.

Lucian was dressed in a dashing suit, one that was a mixture of midnight and dark blues to match his alluring eyes. His hair was pulled back, and he still managed to look every inch the predator he was. No amount of expensive suits hid what he was, or ever could. Falcon stepped in front of him, blocking my view.

I tore my eyes it from where Falcon stood, searching the other faces until I found Alden gazing at my mother from across the crowded room with a longing that tightened my chest. Dexter stood mere inches away from him, vying for Kat’s attention as men offered for her hand in the next dance. No one had the balls to go for what they really wanted. They wasted time pining away instead of going for it.

Didn’t they know how short life was? How precarious it could be, or that in an instant, it could be lost? They ignored what they wanted most, hiding or burying their feelings to protect their heart from getting rejected or hurt. I bit my lip as tears filled my vision as I considered what I had done. I’d pushed Lucian away and he was the one thing that stood beside me.

Yes, what he’d done was wrong, but his intentions had been pure. He’d fought to protect me, and even so, I’d lashed out. And while I had a right to be hurt, did I really want to waste any more time without him? The crowd began to chatter again, and men moved towards me with purpose in their gait.

I stood on the stairs that led into the room and, before the first man could offer his hand to dance, I began moving. The urgency inside of me grew as I started through them, turning sideways to pass as they tried to vie for my attention or talk to me.

Falcon growled when I passed him by, his words of tradition ringing in my head, and I smirked as I headed straight for the one man who held my soul. Fuck tradition; fuck the coven’s laws tonight. Life was too short. I knew what I wanted and I intended to take it; nothing else mattered right now. I pushed past anyone who tried to bar my way to the one man I wanted, the one who stole my heart like a thief in the night. He waited in place, not moving as I made the choice on my own, deciding my own path.

I rushed into his arms and kissed him with everything I had. I didn’t care who watched us, or if I was disobeying what the coven had laid down for me to follow. The guards had followed me right to him, circling around us as I threaded my fingers through his hair, claiming him in the only way I could. I knew without having to look around us that every eye in the club was on us. It didn’t matter; the moment our lips touched, everything else faded away into the background.

There might be no tomorrow for us, just right now. My grandmother’s message she’d given them to hand to me was long forgotten, and even if the coven kicked me out, I knew he’d be there to catch me when or if I fell. I didn’t need another lover, didn’t care to take one. There was this man, and he alone held the key to my heart.

His arms slipped around my back, lifting me closer as our bodies crushed together. Our mouths moved in a dance as old as time as each of us fought to get closer to the other. His hands slid up my back, capturing my face between their warmth as he pulled away and stared into my gaze.

“What are you doing, little witch?” he murmured as his lips touched mine again as if he couldn’t get enough of them.

“I’m yours,” I whispered as his smile broadened and he pulled me close again, claiming my mouth in a toe-curling kiss. He invaded me, the smell of sandalwood and masculinity unraveling my last shred of dignity as I moaned loudly against his lips. I didn’t care who heard it.

The club had started moving around us, dancing as they pretended not to watch us in our brazen embrace as we threw propriety to the wind and basked in each other’s presence. He was my perfect. Lucian Blackstone was my own fucked up version of perfection that I craved more than I did the need to breathe. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t mortal, or that we were so different, or more to the point, that we were all wrong, because together, he was my right.

“Magdalena,” he warned as he pulled back and peered down at me. “You were always mine,” he murmured before he started moving me around to the music that played in the background. Ed Sheeran’s Perfect filled the room and Lucian surprised me as he moved us gracefully. We glided around the floor, the men slowly moving around us as we danced to the heady notes of the song. He danced perfectly, as if he’d practiced it a million times. He ignored my clumsy movements and controlled them, which made it appear as though I didn’t have two left feet.

“You could have acted surprised,” I mouthed off as my brain registered what he’d said.

“Why would I do that?” he countered as his fingers threaded through mine when we stopped dancing and stood in the middle of the dance floor with couples all around us. “I knew you would come around, you needed time. I gave it to you because I know you’re one of the most stubborn women on the planet.”

“You’re a conceited ass,” I laughed as I smirked up at him. He shook his head and pulled me with him away from the dance floor. “Hey,” I said, pulling back against his hold on my hand as he tried to leave the dance. “Coven rules state we cannot leave until at least the fifth song.”

“Fuck coven laws tonight, Lena. I’m seconds away from ripping off that dress and claiming you right in the middle of this dance floor so every asshole in here stops eye-fucking you.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” I challenged. My eyes grew wide as he turned around and grabbed the strap that sat on my shoulder. “Don’t you dare, Lucian!” I warned with a giggle.

“I’ve been patient with you, but it has reached its end, little witch,” he warned as he pulled me with him, as we entered the empty hallway.

The moment we were out of view of the others, he pushed me against the wall, trapping me between his hands as he placed his face inches away from mine. His lips touched my neck and I groaned as desire tore through me. My body clenched in response to his hungry mouth as he sucked against the rapid pulse that hammered wildly for his touch. “You’re so fucking beautiful, but tonight, tonight you shine from within with a confidence that surprises me. I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want you right now,” he admitted between kisses.

“We need a room,” I uttered, breathless from his kisses. He lifted me until I was forced to wrap my legs around his waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pushing my fingers through his silky hair as I held his mouth against mine.

He ground his cock against my wetness, uncaring that this position showed my bare thighs or maybe even more to the men who coughed or made remarks as we struggled to get closer to one another.

“We’re not going to make it,” he growled as he started us down the hallway, not bothering to set me on my feet.

“Lucian,” I warned and grinned against his mouth as he kicked the door to the bedroom open. “You undo me,” I moaned as he slammed the door in the men’s faces, much to their disappointment.

Chapter 30

The moment the door was closed, flames leapt from the candles that filled the room and bathed it in a soft glow. The music started up as I slid down his body slowly, not missing the ardor that filled him as his hands slowly slid down my exposed sides. Theory of a Deadman’s cover of Wicked Games started up as he turned me around, cupping my breasts as his lips kissed the back of my neck until my legs grew weak.

He slowly walked me towards the bed, never stopping until we reached it. I expected to be tossed onto it. Instead, he pulled his mouth away from my neck and untied the bow at the back of the dress. His hands came up, warm against my arm as he pushed one shoulder off, kissing it softly with his hungry mouth, only to repeat it with the other. He worked it as if he was opening a treasured gift.

The dress pooled around my feet, and I kicked it to the side as he slowly kissed his way down my spine. The panties I wore were ruffled, which pulled a growl of approval from deep in his chest as he pushed them down.

Once he’d bared me to his greedy gaze, he slowly trailed his fingers up my thighs and side until he stood at his full height. He grabbed my hair, fisting it as he turned me around and then lowered his forehead against mine. He swallowed hard as he searched my face, and whatever he found there made him growl with approval. His lips touched mine and I moaned, leaning forward, only to feel him pull against my hair. He tugged my head back, using my hair for leverage as his lips met mine and his tongue sought entrance. His other hand touched my sex, parting it with his skilled fingers as it slid through the slick readiness he’d created. He rumbled from deep in his chest as his mouth consumed any coherent thought I had. It wasn’t just a kiss, it was more.

He backed up, staring down at my naked body as he slowly began to remove his shirt. I was lost in the sight of him stripping so much that I didn’t even realize the song was slowly repeating over and over—and I didn’t necessarily care, either. He’d picked it; for some reason this beautiful creature had chosen this song to make love to me with.

Once his chest was bared, I lowered my mouth, licking along the lines of each tattoo, unable to stop myself as I lowered myself to the bed, sitting on it as he allowed my moment of weakness. His hands tangled in my hair as he allowed me to continue, his breathy sigh encouraging me as I struggled against his slacks, needing them off as much as I needed him inside my body.

“What the fuck am I going to do with you?” he murmured as I freed his cock and slowly licked down the long length of him until I felt him tense against my seduction. I kissed the thick tip, slowly enveloping him in my mouth until I felt him pushing against my throat. His hold on my hair tightened as I swallowed until my throat relaxed, allowing even more in. When I started to withdraw, he pushed me down, following me as his mouth found mine, claiming it hungrily until breathing no longer mattered. His fingers parted my sex, slipping through the wet folds as he tested the waters of my desire.

My knees dropped, giving him further access to my pussy. His mouth left mine devoid of his heat and I cried out. He nipped at my breasts, slowly licking around the areola before his teeth scraped over the heated peaks. His middle finger entered me and I arched against it for more, his mouth devouring my skin as his finger worked magic on my pussy. I exploded without warning and he laughed against my nipple as his gaze lifted and he bit down gently, nipping my flesh.

Lucian pulled me up until I wrapped my legs around him, poised above his thick cock as he slowly used my hips to push me down onto it. I cried out as he stretched me until my body trembled and adjusted to his fullness.

His arms wrapped around me, forcing me to work against his cock as I rose and lowered my body, his lips once again finding mine. His hands rose, grasping my face on either side and capturing it, kissing me as if it was the first and last kiss he would have. The orgasm built inside of me until it was a storm, threatening to release. The moment it did, I screamed his name like he was my savior, as if he was my God. My hands lifted to thread through his hair, holding him still as my mouth continued to battle against his. With his growl and my moan, the music was drowned out against the fervor in the room, a fever burning that neither of us could control.

“Greedy little witch,” he murmured.

He pushed me down, following me onto the bed as he started to pick up the pace, taking what he needed. My hands continued to hold his mouth against mine. His slim hips moved slowly, as if he was savoring every thrust. He broke the kiss, staring down into my face with a look that both confused and undid me. He ate my soul, and never had I felt more loved than I did right now, more cherished than I did as he gazed down at me.

I watched as he lifted his body, supporting his weight on his arms as he started to move faster. My legs wrapped around his waist, giving him more depth as he watched me through obsidian eyes that tore apart my defenses and battered my already fractured walls. I didn’t know how to react to this, the slow love that he was showering me with. I could react to hard, brutal sex, but this…this was new to me. This gentleness from him terrified me.

He continued until I cried out with the impending orgasm that lingered just on the precipice of the cliff—and then everything changed. His body slammed against mine and he rolled me, forcing me to rock my hips as I straddled him. His hands grasped my breasts, pulling against the nipples as I clenched around him, my body tightening hard against him as the orgasm ripped me apart. The moment it began to ebb, he rolled us and pushed my legs further apart as he slammed against my body with brutal intensity. It refused to stop; orgasm after orgasm shuddered through me until my body refused to stop shaking with the force as each one grew stronger. His hand lifted, pushing against my throat. I braced for my air to be stolen, but it never came. His thumb pushed into my mouth and I bit down, sucking greedily against it as he continued to ride my body hard.

When he withdrew his thumb, he captured my chin in his palm, cradling my face against his mouth as he lowered it. His body shuddered and I felt him emptying inside of me. He moaned, unable to stop it from finding purchase as he swore and trembled against me.

He lay beside me in the bed, lifting my leg, which he held over his hip as he entered me again. He didn’t stop. Hours passed, and every time we came apart, he held me until his cock pushed back into my body.

When we couldn’t physically take any more, he held me. We talked and I laughed, something we’d never done before. It was unusual, but I wasn’t going to question it. This was a side of Lucian not many got to see, and it was the first time I was seeing him beyond the cold exterior he showed to others.

“I’ve never been slow with anyone,” he disclosed, and I blinked as I turned and looked at him in disbelief.

“Never?” I questioned.

“I’ve never cared to,” he admitted. “I fuck hard. I don’t think when I fuck; it’s just something I do.”

“What changed?” I asked, fishing for the reason. I knew why I’d wanted him. Everything inside of me had cried out of love for him, and he held my heart in his palm whether he wanted it or not. I’d vowed to never love again, and yet with him, I’d fought it and failed.

“I don’t know,” he murmured. “Something about you tonight made me need this,” he said thoughtfully. I swallowed hard at the tension I heard in his voice, the way he stiffened as if he had just discovered something he didn’t want to, or liked.

I exhaled and settled against his arms for warmth. We’d talked for hours between bouts of crazy sex and endless passion, but now something was wedging us apart.

“Maybe you fell in love with me,” I joked and felt him tense even more against me.

“Go to bed, Lena.”

“I love you,” I whispered as my eyelids grew heavy, as if he’d used something to force me to sleep, but I fought against it. “I always have.”

“Bloody hell,” he growled as he pushed his legs into his pants and paced beside the bed. “You shouldn’t have said that! Fuck!” His fist hit the wall, sending plaster crashing to the hardwood floor. I swallowed as a tear slipped from my eye. I’d fallen in love with this brutal man, and he’d rejected it.

Chapter 31

We stood outside the club with the wind howling as the storm clouds moved in. It was as if the world sensed the coming darkness we were about to release upon it. Lucian and his men, along with the Fae, patrolled the club’s impressive parking lot where we had set up the altar, along with the blood of the animals they’d sacrificed. They’d done everything as the books had instructed, and yet I felt something was off, wrong.

Something inside of me was screaming to get out as each new preparation was secured and made. I watched with detachment as the morning replayed through my mind. Lucian had been gone long before I’d awoken, if he’d even slept in the bed at all. His things had been moved, and the more I thought about it, the angrier I became.

He’d gone from red hot to ice-cold before I even knew what to think or could figure out what I’d done to deserve it. I watched him from beneath my lashes, noting he acted as if I didn’t even exist anymore. Was it because I’d told him that I loved him and he’d never wanted it? Or was it because I was no longer a challenge? I swallowed as Kat and Dexter approached.

“Whoa,” Kat announced as she took in the angry look. “You’d think you would be smiling this morning, after that little display last night.”

“Yeah, everyone is talking about how you went and threw caution to the wind and fucked him, again,” Dexter muttered as he stared at Kat. “Couldn’t even care less or see what was right there in front of you,” he grouched.

“Just tell her, Dexter,” I growled back. “She isn’t a fucking empath; what the fuck is with men? You don’t tell us and expect us to just know what is wrong. Well guess what, she doesn’t even have a fucking clue you like her, and the worst part is she loves you! She always has and yet you say nothing,” I snapped, and then blanched as they stared at me as if I was losing it.

I hated that I had ousted him, but then he wouldn’t have ever told her he’s liked her since first grade. He was shy with her, while he was a total flirt with everyone else. I swung my gaze back to Lucian, only to catch him speaking to a girl who was touching him entirely too much.

“What the fuck, Lena?” Dexter demanded, and I frowned as I took in his pinched features.

“She didn’t know,” I explained. “You expect her to guess, and she’s Kat, Dex. She doesn’t take the hints, and you know it. So why beat around the bush? We could all die tomorrow and you’d die without telling her how you feel, so stop wasting time, and for God’s sake, just do it!”

“Lena,” Kat said as she put her hand on my shoulder, but I shrugged her off. “What happened—and you like me?” she said to Dexter who nodded as his gaze lowered to the ground shyly.

“I told Lucian I loved him,” I replied, and she clapped her hand over her mouth.

“That’s great, so why aren’t we happy?”

“Because he left the bed cussing and then moved his things out of the room,” I confessed truthfully.

“That rat bastard,” she seethed, glaring at his back across the parking lot. “I say we fuck him up, or cast a spell on him.”

“It’s fine,” I said as I chewed my lip as my grandmother cleared her throat pointedly. “We can’t cast on him, he’s not mortal, but thanks for that,” I laughed soundlessly.

“Once the stone changes colors, if it does, you will then move into the circle of protection,” she explained as I stared down at the overly large pentagram that held several in the middle of it. “There you will embrace the darkness, Hecate have mercy on your soul. If you cannot fight it off, you will be handled. We cannot allow those who turn evil to leave the boundaries of the protection barrier. Does everyone understand?” she asked, and we nodded, even though I hadn’t been listening to most of what she had said.

“Lena, what if we end up being chosen?” Kat asked as her gaze strayed to Dexter, who hadn’t said much since I’d blurted his feelings for her.

“If you’re chosen, stay in the group that is good. You will fight the darkness as it grows inside of you. Think of those you love, everything you could lose if you let it take hold and gain control of you.”

“What happens if the majority turns evil?” Dexter countered, finally speaking up. “What the fuck do we do then?”

“I don’t know,” I answered as we started to migrate to the line to pull a rock from the pile. Only those under twenty-five were choosing stones. Plus, any who were pregnant wouldn’t be allowed to, which meant Kendra was out of the process altogether. I looked down at my white sweat suit that said Some Like it Witchy across the bust line and ass of the outfit in bright pink writing.

Once we’d selected our stones, we moved to the rather large group, which awaited the spell to be cast. Torches and piles of wood were ignited around the protection lines, and jasmine and sandalwood were placed with basil and other dried herbs for protection. Crystals were placed sporadically through the area to ensure the safety of those who remained white, and yet something kept itching against my brain, as if it was trying to warn me.

The moment everything was set up, chanting began and, one by one, we stepped forward, holding the rock in one palm as we slid a blade through the palm of our hand, leaving a shallow cut in it before we used the other hand to place the stone into the blood.

I watched from the back of the group as each witch moved up with the stone held in their closed palm. The first few passed and went back to the coven that stood off to the side, watching in sadness as one by one, their children and bloodline moved closer to their fate. Within an hour, we had fourteen dark witches, and most of the others remained the same, untouched by the taint that could either destroy them, or save us.

It wasn’t until Kat stepped up to reveal her stone that my stomach sank as my grandmother’s face twisted in sadness. I swallowed a cry of denial as she twisted her neck to look back at me, a look of sheer panic in her beautiful gaze.

Next, Dexter moved up, mere feet away from me, he too was chosen. His shoulders didn’t shrink as Kat’s had. Instead, he moved to her in the pentagram and hugged her tightly. The next few were a mixture of white and dark, and then I stepped up to my grandmother. Her vision sparkled with unshed tears as I held out my hand, palm up. The look of relief that washed over her sent a pang of guilt rushing through me.

She exhaled and motioned for the group who waited to see if any of the chosen failed to the darkness. I stared at Kat and Dexter, who embraced each other, and my stomach churned with unease. Falcon looked excited, and I wondered if he hadn’t already known his fate. His cronies remained close to his side.

Every one of the men who had remained close at his side had been chosen. An unsettling feeling filled the air, but as I watched Falcon, I noted he anticipated something. My heart slowed as I watched him, noting the thin black pupils that seemed to pulse, as if they wanted to grow.

My mind flashed back to the first few days in Portland, to the clubs that I’d been wild inside of. It was as if memories were slowly coming back, and then something I’d hidden came rushing back. I knew his look; I knew it because I’d felt it before.

I stepped backwards slowly, turning to move to the back of the group. I withdrew the knife from my pocket, slowly cutting open the tip of each finger as I expelled the tiny shard of crystal I’d sewn into them to hold it at bay. I whispered the spell to heal my skin but nothing happened. We were warded against magic, I realized as I stared down at the symbols scribbled on the concrete. I stared at the blood oozing from my fingertips and frowned. I slipped the knife into its sheath and moved back to the front of the group as I pushed my hands into my pockets, concealing the blood.

Kat and Dexter stood with two other witches as the larger group stood on the other side. There were witches from the coven all around them outside the barrier, placing the final pieces to ignite the spell that would force the darkness which had chosen them to come out. My stomach swirled with unease as Falcon smirked at me, and then his eyes blurred, turning black as he tilted his head.

He was already dark. I closed my eyes, remembering the way his skin felt oily, as if he was tainted. I started forward but I was too late. The magical cage ignited, sending a buzzing noise through the air around us.

“He’s already dark,” I uttered as I looked through the crowd for my mother. I pushed through the coven members, struggling to find her. Once I did, I grabbed her arm and watched as Kendra smirked beside her. “They came to us dark,” I announced, horrified that my friends were inside that magical cage with them. They’d slaughter the others before they ever had a chance to fully embrace their own darkness.

“What are you talking about, Lena?” she demanded. I looked past her to Kendra and watched as her face contorted.

“Lena, save me!” echoed through my head so loudly that it almost took me to my knees. “You have to save me!”

Something changed in her eyes; they turned darker as her face moved, looking to those who started shouting from the cage. I swallowed and shook my head.

“Kendra?”

“Lena, save me.” She sounded weak, almost faint this time she spoke. As if she’d used everything she had to get the first words out. I blinked repeatedly as I covered my ears as the endless chatter erupted inside my head.

“Magdalena!” my mother shouted, grabbing my hands as a scream ripped from the cage. I turned, hating the noise level that rose around me. Sabrina was in front of Kat and Dexter, and she was on the ground, writhing in pain. I looked at Falcon, who was moving his fingers as he stared at her. He was casting…dark magic.

“They were already dark. They didn’t turn dark,” I mouthed in horror as I pulled away from her.

I stepped forward as blood exploded from Sabrina’s nose and mouth. She screamed as Falcon grinned coldly; those behind him joined him as he started to laugh as Sabrina’s body jerked, and she screamed louder with pain tearing her apart, literally.

“Stop them!” I screamed and watched as my grandmother turned, staring at me as her complexion turned pale. Her eyes were large, rounded in the horror of watching what was unfolding. “Stop them!” They had to stop this. Kat and Dexter were inside with Falcon, the same monster who had helped Kendra blow the dust into my face.

“No one can get into them, it’s sealed, Lena,” my mother murmured.

I moved forward as the Fae closed in, expecting the dark witches to escape the cage if my grandmother opened it. I knew she wouldn’t. She would be potentially placing the coven in mortal danger if they escaped. Kat and Dexter would die once they’d finished murdering Sabrina. They’d come here to kill us, all of us. They hadn’t wanted protection, they’d wanted to take the power the white witches held, the same as the demons we feared. One would use our bodies; the other could steal our power. Both were evil.

Dark witches could siphon white magic as their own, adding it to their power. That’s why everyone feared Benjamin, but where he’d helped us, these fuckers had strolled right in—and we’d allowed it. I brought the knife from my pocket when everyone else screamed in fear as Sabrina began bending in weird positions as they broke every bone in her body from the inside.

I slit my tongue open, spitting out the last crystal my body held to keep the darkness I’d conquered at bay. I moved with purpose, watching as everyone stepped away from me. Power erupted from me, sending a wave of it crashing through the crowd as lightning exploded, hitting trees just mere feet away from where Falcon stood. His gaze searched the crowd until they landed on me. He smiled coldly, unafraid of me. He should be afraid. I’d fought the darkness and already won. I’d suppressed it until now, keeping it locked inside and hidden with crystals made directly from the original leylines.

Someone moved to stop me and I disappeared from where I’d stood, popping up in front of Kat and Dexter. Their cage held darkness in, not out. I spun around, staring at my friends as they came up from where they’d been huddling together on the ground, awaiting death.

“Lena, you’re…dark,” Kat whimpered as she stared at me, confused.

“I am not dark, not entirely,” I uttered, spinning back around as I felt power rushing towards me. I lifted my hand, easily preventing his magic from touching me or my friends. “Stay behind me,” I ordered as I let the darkness inside of me unravel. I’d been terrified of it, of the vile things it had whispered to me. I’d wanted to murder everyone and anything when it had first shown up right after Joshua’s funeral. I’d left without a word after that, unable to control it and terrified of what would happen if I couldn’t.

The other witches started adding to Falcon’s power as he stepped back into their protection. I reacted, moving forward without a thought other than the fact that Kat and Dexter’s lives were within my ability to protect them. Coven law stated that we protected our own, no matter the cost. The problem was that I liked the darkness. It offered freedom; the magic it released was raw, powerful, and there was no limit to what you could do.

But it came with a price. One I hadn’t wanted to pay. Until now.

The first witch stepped into my path, intending to take me down, and I smiled as the blackness inside of me erupted without warning. I reached for his arms, grabbing both as he threw the first punches, which would also be his last. Falcon’s magic continued to assault me but it didn’t touch me. I’d built a wall between him and us. It was a strong magical barrier that refused to allow him to touch my friends with his tainted magic.

My hands captured the man’s arms and I ripped them from their sockets. He wailed and I smiled coldly, using the magic inside of me to finish him. Blood exploded as his body was ripped apart. He dropped and the next one moved to take his place. I kicked him in the nuts, using an uppercut to catch him off guard before I dropped, swinging my leg out to send his out from beneath him. I didn’t murder him; I wouldn’t allow the magic to do as it wished. I pulled it back and shoved it into the dark recess of my mind as I stood up and stared at Falcon.

My hair floated with the power pulsing through me. I had an endless supply of magic at my fingertips.

“If it isn’t a fucking Fitzgerald,” Falcon laughed coldly. “Wasn’t expecting that,” he sneered as his men got closer to him, as if they could save him. I’d been burying my magic for so long that it had built up a dangerous supply. It was why I hadn’t been able to release the leyline. I’d hidden it so deep that I’d blocked myself from knowing it was there; unless someone I loved had their life on the line, it would have remained locked inside, hidden from even me. I’d erased my own memories of it, leaving only a few crumbs to lead me back, should I ever need to use it. Not even Lucian’s blood magic had found it. Kat and Dexter being placed in danger had made the crystals in my fingertips burn, my trigger to unlock the memories.

They moved as a group, and I smirked as I shouted a spell to make them all float in the air, helpless, unable to cast. They screamed as their bodies became paralyzed in midair. I walked below their floating bodies until I was toe to toe with Falcon.

“You are not welcome here,” I growled. “Leave now and I will release those who came with you, but you are not to return here. Your kind is unwelcomed.”

“You think you can do a spell and beat me? You’re nothing,” he laughed coldly as he moved to strike me. I grabbed through his chest without a thought, withdrawing his still-beating heart as I held it up to my eyes, which I knew were black from the sudden release of raw, dark power I’d called upon. Blood dripped from my wrist and arm and I stared at his useless heart, covered in thick black lines. He’d been dark longer than I had. I dropped it as he fell to the ground. My head tilted and I swung my head to where I felt a heavy stare boring into my head.

Lucian stared at me and I felt nothing; cold and lifeless as he had made me feel when he’d proceeded to remove his things from the room without a word. He’d used magic to make me sleep through it, but like this, I could remember everything. His midnight gaze flinched as he took in my profile. I knew what I looked like: evil incarnate. Blackness swallowed the irises and whites of my eyes, thick veins of dark magic pulsed beneath my skin, and my hair floated like the men I stood beneath. Gone was his little wilted flower who needed to be loved, and in her place was a coldness that didn’t want his warmth.

“Put it away, Lena, he’s gone.”

I stared at him, unwavering as I decided the fates of those who literally hung in the balance. I could hear my mother crying as Alden comforted her with empty words. Synthia inched closer to me, ready to follow through with the promise I’d made her vow to keep. Kat and Dexter begged me to bury it wherever I’d hidden it before, and I ignored them all as I stared into eyes the color of the flames that burned in Hell as he ordered me to come back.

“Kill him,” a voice whispered, and I smiled as I considered it.

“It cannot win if you are stronger,” a softer voice whispered, and I blinked. “Do as he says, he’s trying to help you.”

“She doesn’t need him. He’ll kill them all if she doesn’t stop him. We all know that lesson too well. He is death; he will take her soul and curse it, as he has done with all of ours.”

“She is in love with him.”

“And that worked out so well for us, didn’t it?”

They were arguing again inside my head. I shoved them all away, the voices, the magic, the power that flowed through me. Grunts sounded as bodies hit the ground and I craned my neck as I watched them get up with horrified looks as they got as far away from me as possible. I slowly moved to see what had become of Falcon and blanched as his severed heart lay beside his head, directly in front of his open eyes. The other body lay in pieces, two to be exact, still where I’d ripped it apart. I knew why those who had welcomed the darkness kept it; it numbed the pain of what you had done in its sickening embrace.

“Magdalena,” my grandmother fretted. I turned sapphire blue eyes on her and watched as she exhaled deeply, releasing the fear she’d held. I dismissed her as I moved away from Lucian and Synthia, towards Kat and Dexter and the others from my coven who had awaited certain death at the hands of the dark witches we’d allowed to get close to them.

Their darkness called to mine and I smiled, holding my arms out as they rushed into them. They were my people. I’d given up my secret to save them, and I wouldn’t change it. I was born bad, with a sickness that not many could contain, but it didn’t change that I was good, too. Had I known who my father was, I could have handled it before it had driven me from town.

I was born into darkness, but so, too, was Benjamin. Unlike him, the moment it had surfaced, I’d been old enough to hide it from others, even the High Priestess. I’d stayed away from them until I knew I wasn’t a risk or danger to my coven, but I’d needed my powers awakened. I laughed as I considered what it entailed. I’d awakened to my powers on Lucian’s cock, because I hadn’t needed to be blessed by anyone; darkness doesn’t need the light. The light needed the darkness so it could see the stars and the beauty that the night held secret.

“Magdalena, not a word,” my grandmother urged as I released Kat and Dexter to be freed from the circle.

“I know the rules,” I said. I spun on my heel, facing the witches that Falcon had brought with him, the dark witches of my own coven at my back. “You can stay and fight the demons with me, or you can run and I will hunt you down and kill you. That choice is yours, only you can make it. Your leader is dead, and he was of weak bloodlines, but I am not. I am Magdalena Fitzgerald, dark witch of the Haven Crest coven, and my coven is ours to protect. Vow you will not harm them and I will allow you to live.”

“Falcon promised us power, we’re not from strong bloodlines,” one announced.

“You don’t need to be from strong bloodlines if you are dark witches. You just have to be smart enough to survive. Power comes with time, but the white witches of this coven will keep theirs. No harm is to become of them; vow it, or die.”

“You will kill us anyways,” another shouted. The others agreed.

“It is possible, but I will make you a promise that I won’t do it today. If you decide to leave, you will leave this town and never come back. If you stay, you will promise to protect the coven and in exchange, you will have food and shelter, and you won’t have to face or worry about demons as you sleep. Decide.”

I waited, not knowing if they would choose to follow me, or if the coven would even allow it. However, we’d only gained a handful of witches who could protect the coven and we needed them all.

“You won’t kill us if we remain with you?” one of the younger boys asked. He couldn’t have been any older than sixteen. He trembled and I frowned.

“I do not relish the kills, but if the need arises to protect my coven, I will not hesitate. Our laws state that we protect our own, and if that need arises,” I moved my eyes to hold my grandmother’s, “then we will do whatever it takes to protect them, no matter the cost to ourselves.”

They huddled together and we waited; once they’d decided, I exhaled and nodded. I hadn’t wanted to release the magic again. Each time I used it, it became harder and harder to push it away. It was why I’d placed the shards into my skin and tongue, blocking every point on my body that could release magic. Then I’d erased my own memories, which was probably why, when Lucian had erased it again, it had taken so long for them to come back.

I turned and faced my grandmother, bending down until I was on my knees, the others following my lead. I lifted my gaze to hold hers.

“I am yours, you are mine. I give this vow through the blood of mine. You are mine to protect, and I am yours to control. The coven shall accept us, one and all, for this darkness inside should not fight the light. In your darkest hour of need, we will arise, to fight with you by our side. I am given to you in this time of need, do you accept me as yours, to use as you need?” I waited, praying she would accept us.

“I accept, granddaughter mine. Rise darkness, and come to the light, for we have need of you at this time.”

I rose and frowned.

“What?” she asked softly.

“That was corny as shit,” I laughed nervously.

She laughed and the crowd released its breath, joining in. We’d survived the darkness, and as I searched the crowd for my mother, I paused. Tears streamed down her cheeks as Kendra glowered beside her. Her gaze remained locked on Falcon’s remains. I swallowed down the suspicions for tonight and almost jumped out of my skin as my grandmother touched my arm.

“You were not supposed to intervene,” she announced. “I am glad you disobeyed this time, but it could have turned out differently for you, granddaughter.”

“I vowed to protect the coven at all costs when I agreed to allow the ancestors to awaken my powers. We all did; I made a choice. It’s one I will have to live with.”

“You didn’t make a choice here; you revealed that dark witches can be saved. You used crystals to keep it hidden, to contain it. You have done the unthinkable, but you have also given the coven hope on this day, in our darkest hour.”

Chapter 32

Life seemed to be placed on pause as everyone scrambled for what would happen next. Days had passed since we’d embraced the darkness, and while only one person hadn’t been able to endure or contain it, the rest of us seemed to be managing it rather well. Unless you counted going insane from being locked up in Club Chaos, but that had changed yesterday. We were now patrolling our town, slowly removing the demons who lingered. It was a learning curve we were adapting to rather quickly.

We’d only encountered a few, but one pack had been at least three generations of a family who’d been turned into vile creatures, which attacked us. The blessing of dark magic was the numbness it offered, the blind rage that allowed you to kill without feeling it. That too faded with the power as it subsided. We’d buried the Grangers beside the road in shallow graves, unable to give them more as we made our way deeper into the woods.

I knew the others felt it as deeply as I had. The loss of the family, as if they’d been human. They had been inhabited, and to those of us who knew them, it felt wrong to end their lives. I slowed as the cabin came into view through the woods. My grandmother had requested we check in on the seer, but from this vantage point on the hill, the cabin looked rundown. The runes were outdated, unkempt, and broken. It looked all wrong, and even though my gut told me to leave, I couldn’t.

“She’s probably dead,” Kat pointed out as her hair blew in the wind howling through the valley. I hated to admit it, but she was probably right.

“We still have to be sure,” I mused as I continued to survey the decrepit cabin. Parts of the roof were missing, along with the windows that now littered the ground in glittering shards of glass. The door was cracked open, and no sound flowed from within. I frowned as I turned and nodded to the others as we started forward. “I want five of you outside on each side of the cabin. Every entry point gets two guards. If you see anything out of the ordinary, turn dark. My gut says there’s something wrong with this place.”

“It’s all fucking wrong,” Dexter agreed as he shivered and slipped his fingers through Kat’s before letting them drop. I smirked, knowing they’d shacked up finally. Of course, they were trying to keep it hidden, all things considered.

I stopped at the door, and let the magic from within slither over my skin. Dark magic slinked and crawled in, warming over the uppermost layers of my skin. I gazed inside the darkened cabin and then at the yellowed, discolored grass that held the rune stones. Bending over, I picked up one and touched the red substance used to draw the enhanced protection spell.

“It’s not for protection,” I announced. The others followed my lead, picking up the stones and examining them as I toed the salt line that should have been whole, but was broken. “They kept something inside, not anyone from getting inside,” I mused as I dropped the stone and pushed the door open.

I could make out a corpse placed atop a table. Chains held limbs in place, as if they hadn’t wanted her to escape. I swallowed past the lump in my throat as I stepped over the threshold and into the falling down cabin.

Light from outside flooded the room, exposing the skeletal remains that sat in the middle of the room. She’d been dead for a while, according to the yellowing of the bones and the thick layer of dust that covered her. I knew the coven had stopped visiting her a long time ago, soon after they’d brought me here to her.

“That’s disturbing,” Kat’s voice trailed off as she followed me in.

Around the body were dried flowers, enchanted chains, and thin silver lines that went from the body to the wall, where hooks held them in place. The air inside the cabin was stale, as if even with the broken windows no fresh air could get inside. The ropes held charms on them, which were musical as the gentle breeze jingled them. The wind touched them, and yet the air in the cabin was stagnant. I closed my eyes as I mentally flipped the pages inside my head until I found what I was looking for.

“She’s spelled, and those charms are as well. Don’t touch them or anything else in here,” I warned as I walked around the cabin, opening the only other door inside it. The entire house had one closet? I looked around, noting the old cooking stove that sat off in the corner. I walked to the window, peering out and frowning as I saw the old moon-shaped door of an outhouse. “This house is old, really old,” I mumbled as I went back to the closet and pulled out the leather-bound journals.

I set them down beside the corpse and opened the first one. “Meet Brenna MacTavish, first wife of Drake Vanderbilt. It says here she was waiting for him to return to her.” I swallowed hard. “Ninety-three years ago, Brenna had been shunned by her coven for catching the eye of a dark witch, who poisoned her mind with tales of the coming of Lucifer,” I exhaled as I stared down at the corpse. “The charms are used to control the dead,” I explained. “The chords are controlled by someone who could be anywhere using them with magic. Which means everything she’s ever told the coven was a lie. She was never here. Her last entry states she waited for Drake for days before she lost their child, and then feared she would die of starvation before he returned. Their horses perished in a storm, and she had no way to leave here.”

“Isn’t she the one who told your mother you were pure of soul?” Kat asked, and I nodded slowly.

“Also the same one who said Benjamin was dark and forced my mother to send him to Drake, Drake Vanderbilt. My father,” I snorted.

“That can’t be good.”

“No, it means that someone has been feeding the coven information from God-knows-where for a very long time. All he had to do was call on her soul, which is trapped here in this cabin. To anyone else, she’d appear alive and well, taking the form of whomever he projected to them. The coven came for a seer, a renowned one who was old. That’s exactly what they saw when they arrived here. To activate her, the runes outside the cabin would alert whoever controlled her to the presence of others. They’d use a pattern with the chords to wake her. The charms on her body match to those on the chords, much like those we use to awaken the ancestors for the ceremonies. Only, these ones are controlled with ancient magic, dark magic that controls the soul of the dead it is attached to.”

“But why would anyone want to control someone like this? Even for dark magic, this is fucking morbid. And why her?”

“Because she decided who was dark and light from the coven, and also who is thrown out when they are unable to be controlled. When I was a child, they brought me here to her. She told them I was pure of soul, and that Benjamin was dark and tainted, and couldn’t be saved. She told my mother if Joshua was to live, Benjamin had to die. Whoever is controlling her had Benjamin removed from the coven,” I growled as anger pulsed through me. Someone had fucked with my family; they’d used this poor soul to dispel my brother before he was old enough to defend himself.

“That’s not good,” Dexter announced as he entered, running into the silver chord before we could warn him. His arm reached up and his hand jingled several charms. The air inside the cabin intensified, growing thick with darkness.

All eyes moved to the corpse as a cackling sound erupted and an arm lifted, then slowly lowered as it went still once more. It hadn’t been enough to reanimate her, but it would have alerted whoever controlled her to our presence. I shuffled off my bag and slipped the journals inside before pulling it back up over my shoulders. I looked down at the corpse as her face turned towards me slowly.

I could see her soul and I winced as the evil of an unknown presence shuddered through me.

“You’re free, Brenna MacTavish,” I muttered before I started ripping the flowers from the table. “Help me free her soul,” I demanded, and Kat and Dexter jolted into action. I removed the flowers, and the chains, and then I stepped back as dust erupted into the air and her soul escaped. I exhaled and then jumped as a hand touched my shoulder.

I spun around, gasping as the ghostly figure of a young woman stood beside me. Her hair was jet-black, and she had upturned eyes that told me she had once been part Native American, and utterly beautiful.

“Lucifer comes,” she hissed before she began to evaporate. “Thank you, Magdalena. Now run, child,” she whimpered as she turned her head, revealing half of it had been caved in.

“Go, Brenna.” I said firmly as I nodded. “Find peace.”

“Your father…” she tried to explain, but her head lifted and she turned her broken head to the side before a horrified scream tore through her and she vanished.

“My father is an evil bastard,” I snorted after she’d vanished. If I was right, Drake was an evil bastard who had lured Brenna to her death with promises of his undying love. He was a dark witch, which was why I’d felt it the moment tragedy had struck. It was the reason I’d fled from the coven, protecting them from me while learning to live with the pain of my loss, but I’d resorted to pretty drastic measures to beat it. Judging by the journal entries, my father had broken more than coven laws; he’d broken the laws of humanity and was somehow immortal.

I withdrew the thin slender blades Zahruk had given to me, along with the smaller daggers Synthia had donated to our weaponry once she’d seen the lacking supplies we had. I pushed the smaller knives into the thin slits in the sheaths of my waistband and retrieved the swords from the table as I stepped towards the door.

“Stay together. No one says anything unless I say otherwise. He wants me, so if it comes to it, you guys run one way, I’ll go the other,” I grumbled as we emerged from the cabin.

“How does he even know we are here?” Kat demanded.

“My guess? He is the one controlling Brenna, or was. She’s free from him now, which I’m sure he isn’t going to be happy with.” I frowned and then shouted for the others. “Everyone to the front, now, we got company coming.”

“If it was him controlling her and meddling with the coven…”

The air grew thick around us, cutting Kat’s words off as she stalled as the temperature dropped around us. Demons materializing, power pulsed around us, and then Lucifer was there, standing mere feet away from me.

I let the darkness out, ignoring the others as they followed my lead. His piercing blue gaze slowly slid over my face before his lips lifted with a seductive grin. I stepped forward without fear, without hesitation. He wanted me to cower, to fear him, and I wasn’t giving him what he wanted.

“Lena, Lena, Lena,” he repeated my name as his finger came up to trace slowly down my cheek. “So beautiful,” he murmured as he let his hand drop.

“If you came to rip me to pieces, get it over with,” I challenged. “But if you think he will care, I assure you, he won’t. You could rip my heart out and send it to him and he’d probably eat it.”

“Is that what you think? That I am here to hurt you? I have much planned for you, sweet Magdalena, and it includes you being alive for it. When I start to use you against him, you’ll know it,” he laughed. He pulled me closer and placed his mouth against my ear. “Have you told him you carry his child yet?” His lips tugged at my earlobe as a shiver raced down my spine.

“I’m not pregnant,” I whimpered as desire pulsed through me. “Turn that shit off, asshole.”

“Turn what off? Your desire for me? It has little to do with me,” he smirked impishly as he pulled away. “I can control a lot of things, Witch, but your reaction to me isn’t one of them. Darkness does call to darkness… Maybe yours craves a real taste of it for once. You’re toeing the line,” he pointed out as he watched me. “You have no idea what you’re up against, do you? You’re just part of our game, a piece that has yet to be played. We started this game eons ago, he and I. He took away what I wanted most, and now, now I will show him what it feels like. You, you have your part to play in this, but I don’t benefit from your death. No, I need you alive for my plan to see its end.”

“Then call off your demons,” I stated coldly. My body trembled with fear, real fear as his words replayed in my mind. I could feel the fear oozing off those behind me, feeding the monster’s ego as he smirked at my pretend bravado. Even with the darkness running through my veins, I feared this creature. He was the Prince of Hell, and he wanted to use me in some sick, twisted game. There was also what he’d said, which I couldn’t say if he was right or wrong, or just fucking with me. “They seem hell-bent on bringing me with you, and if that isn’t your intention, why the show of force?” I asked with my chin lifted and my shoulders squared. I wouldn’t allow him to see how much he’d shaken me.

“He isn’t fucking you anymore, is he?” he laughed. “Do you need to fuck, Lena? I can pretend to be him if you want me to. I can make you think I am him again; would you like that?” he purred silkily as he pulled me against his chest and inhaled sharply. “You smell like you want to fuck me.”

“I’m not much for playing pretend,” I whispered as I licked my lips and lifted my gaze to lock with his. “In fact, I don’t much care for games at all. They’re too childish for me. I also think you both should grow the fuck up, because the only people who end up hurt are those of us who have nothing to do with it. I’m not part of it, he doesn’t want me, and you only want me because he does. That makes a girl feel really shitty, ya know?”

His hand snaked through my hair and he tipped my head back as his mouth crushed against mine. I pushed against his chest to no avail, knowing no matter how much power I used, it wouldn’t move him. His hands wrapped around me and I groaned as I bit into his lip. He growled and smiled against my mouth. The coppery taste of blood filled my mouth as he pulled back and his stare went to something over my head.

Power erupted, shaking the cabin; the sound of wood collapsing met my ears as light exploded around us. I was yanked back and thrown to the ground hard enough that the wind left my lungs in a sudden whoosh. Pain erupted as I looked up to find Lucian’s midnight eyes glowering down at me from where I had stood, facing Lucifer. Lucian scowled at me with a murderous glint in his depths before he turned around and his hand shot out, capturing Lucifer’s throat.

I struggled to get to my feet, only to have strong hands lift me and hold me. I careened my neck and found Spyder smirking down at me. “Bad, kitty,” he growled angrily. “You didn’t think we’d feel it? Playing around with the devil is a very dangerous game.”

“Feel what?”

“You lip-locking that nasty little fuck,” he hissed.

“Should I have drawn a sword against him instead? How long do you think I would have lived if I had?” I demanded.

“You should have panicked so we felt it faster,” he growled as his arms wrapped around me and we turned back to watch as Lucifer gurgled against Lucian’s hold on his neck. I felt his power unfurling, the world vibrating with it. I felt the darkness enveloping us, and it wasn’t coming from me this time. Spyder’s lips touched my ear and he laughed against it, adding to the vibration running through us.

Metal clashed against metal and I looked around, noting the Fae were battling the demons Lucifer had brought with him. The Horde King zigzagged faster than my gaze could follow, but everywhere he left, bodies remained. Synthia stood in the middle of them, examining her nails as she waited for them to finish. Once the last demon had fallen, he materialized beside her and pulled her close, kissing her hard. As if the battle had turned him on. I blushed, lowering my stare away from their intimate moment.

The darkness inside of me simmered and then released as I let it go to allow my mind to come back. Lucifer made a strangled noise and Lucian snorted.

“She’s mine,” he snarled, and Lucifer laughed.

“She says otherwise,” he coughed out. “You’re not even fucking her anymore, why? I’d have that spread and be so buried in her welcoming warmth that you wouldn’t find me for weeks. Not man enough to keep her in bed that long?” he sneered.

Lucian released him and his armor materialized. Souls writhed and slithered as he stepped closer to Lucifer, only to have huge wings explode from Lucifer’s back as his own armor covered his body, black armor. Lucian slammed into his face with a fist as the other hand produced a sword from thin air and moved to swing it to remove his head, but Lucifer vanished.

I sagged against Spyder in relief until Lucian turned on his heels and started towards me. I tried to back up, only to have Spyder blocking my retreat. The sword vanished and Lucian’s hand wrapped around my wrist, pulling me with him into the cabin. He slammed the door behind us and wrapped his hand around my throat. He trembled as he caressed it, not bothering to apply pressure. My hair rose from the power pulsing from him, and the air in the room filled with the raw current he exuded.

“What the fuck were you doing?” he snarled.

“I was doing as the coven asked me to and checking on the seer,” I growled back.

His armor faded away and his angry stare ate into mine as he searched my face. “And you had to fucking kiss him to do as the coven bid you to do?”

“Or fight him, yes. It wasn’t like I wanted to kiss him; I even bit him to get him to stop,” I shrugged. “Not your problem now, is it? He kills me, and you no longer have to worry about the bond. That would probably be a relief, wouldn’t it?” I laughed stiffly. “You made it very clear that you don’t want me, so I listened to the message, Lucian.”

“You think I don’t fucking care what happens to you?” he demanded coldly.

“I think you shouldn’t,” I smiled impishly as I exhaled and pushed his hand away. “I think we should steer clear of each other. Just like you’ve been doing for the last few days,” I murmured. “I don’t think we work together, and while it was fun, it wasn’t healthy for either of us.”

“You don’t get to throw your life away, and you sure as fuck don’t get to run to Lucifer to get back at me, little girl,” he growled.

“I didn’t run to anyone, and I don’t need him to get back at you. I spilled my fucking heart out to you and you threw it away as if it wasn’t worth your fucking time. What happened, Lucian? I submitted and wasn’t a challenge to you anymore? Or was it because I had the balls to admit what I felt for you? You know what? I don’t even care anymore. I was here, patrolling as the coven asked me to, he showed up, and I used what I had to stall him to save my people. I appeased his fucking ego to survive.

“You think I have anything to get back at you for? I couldn’t care what you think of me, not anymore. I know this might be hard to understand, but my world doesn’t revolve around you. My sun doesn’t set behind your fucking bed, and it sure as hell doesn’t rise in your eyes. You walked away from me, and I’m okay with your choice. You and he both need to leave me out of your fucking games. I’m done being used by both of you. Find someone else to destroy; there’s nothing left of me you can hurt anymore,” I whispered as I pushed past him and exited the cabin. “Fall in,” I demanded as I ignored the stares of pity as everyone watched us start back to the club.

“Lena,” Spyder growled as he moved to join us as we started out of the clearing.

I made it almost to the tree line before Lucian materialized in front of me from thin air. I slammed against his chest and growled as the darkness escaped in my anger. My black gaze lifted to his and power pulsed through me.

“You’re done for today,” he whispered as he watched me with something akin to disappointment in his stare. “He’s still out there.”

“You’re not the one calling the shots anymore, not in my world,” I warned. “If you think that, because you house the covens in your club, you hold any power over me, you’re wrong. I can turn my humanity off, I can shut it down and I won’t feel anything for you or them. So let me go, Lucian. You made it clear where you stood when you walked out the other morning. I’m smart enough to take it as it is and walk away, so let me.”

“Put the darkness away before you end up hurting yourself,” he warned. “You’re not scaring anyone here like you do the others.”

“No, I wouldn’t. Your heart is as black as your soul. It’s as black as mine has become, and you really have to stop thinking I do anything for you. This, this is for me so I’m numb. I don’t feel you anymore. Like this, you can’t hurt me.”

His gaze searched my face and his hand left my flesh. “Is that why you chose to go dark?” he murmured.

“You think I’d do this for you?”

“Why else?” he muttered as he stepped closer, inches away from me. I felt his heat; his earthy masculine scent filled my senses, and I swallowed against the groan that lodged in my throat from needing to touch him.

“Because someone I loved was in danger and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to protect those I love,” I stated, hating that unshed tears shone in my gaze as I stared him down.

“And what if you had to push them away to save them, Lena? Would you do it to protect them?” he murmured as his hand lifted and his finger trailed slowly down my cheek. “Even if it was the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do?”

“Yes,” I replied at his cryptic meaning. I scanned his face before I stepped away from him, turning on my heels to leave him and his fucking riddles. “Let’s go,” I said as I felt the others closing rank around my back and we ignored the others who watched as we left the clearing to slink back into the woods as we made our way home, to Club Chaos. Not that they left us alone. Instead, they trailed after us to ensure we made it back.

I walked into the club and searched out my grandmother and mother. Once I’d found them I pulled them aside.

“I need your help,” I uttered as my heart hammered wildly against my chest.

“What’s wrong?” my grandmother asked as she placed her hand on my shoulder.

“I need you to run a test on me,” I whispered so low I wasn’t sure they’d hear it.

“What sort of test, Lena?” my mother queried, her voice just as soft.

“A pregnancy test,” I answered as unshed tears threatened to fall.

Chapter 33

We had found a room that allowed the privacy needed to run the magical pregnancy test. I paced the floor as I waited for them to finish with their part. I couldn’t have a child now, not after I’d turned dark. Dark children were banned, as Benjamin had been. If I was pregnant, I’d have to leave to have the child. I’d be alone raising a child of God-knew-what species. I had no idea what Lucian really was, and that only added to the stress of what could happen, or what would happen.

“Magdalena, calm down,” my mother instructed softly as I growled as the idea of being knocked upped forced the dark magic to the surface. I turned on my heel, staring at her and watched as she shrunk back away from me.

“I’m sorry,” I said as I struggled to keep it at bay.

“It takes time to get used to…seeing you as such,” she mumbled as she stepped closer to her mother. “You said Lucifer told you this was true? That you were carrying Lucian’s child?” she asked.

“He whispered it into my ear, yes,” I admitted as I watched my grandmother pour the ink into the sand inside the stone bowl used to determine pregnancy. Once she’d finished, I stepped up to it and held my hand out for the small delicate dagger that was used to pierce skin for the blood of the woman being tested.

“Lena, if you’re pregnant…” My grandmother’s words trailed off.

“I’ll be shunned,” I answered. “My child will be removed from the line, and any trace of him will be removed. I know the laws,” I muttered.

“No, not with the changes we’ve made. It was considered that some of the chosen could have conceived before they’d turned. We ruled that those who have will not be removed, nor their child. However, there will be no record of the birth. With Lucian being the father, though, with us not knowing what he is, there is danger in it. The unknowns are always the hardest to foresee playing out.”

“There’s the seer,” my mother said from where she’d begun to pace behind me.

“The seer was dead. She’s been dead a very long time. Long before you were even born, mother. Her name was Brenna MacTavish, born in the 1800s. Her husband’s name was Drake, Drake Vanderbilt. He left her to die alone in that cabin with her unborn child. She left journals. When we found her remains, it had chords tied from the wall to her corpse. Each one contained a magical charm. Someone else controlled her, but when we touched the chords, Lucifer showed up.”

“Drake Vanderbilt?” my mother gasped as she moved to the couch and sat down. “It would have to be one of his ancestors.”

“Unless he is immortal,” I replied, frowning as my mother covered her mouth with her hands. “You wouldn’t have known otherwise. It’s not easy to know what someone is, trust me,” I said, comforting her since I was in the same boat.

“I took you to that seer, Lena. I took Benjamin to her, what if he wasn’t bad? What if I gave him to that monster and he wasn’t bad?”

“Benjamin is dark,” I confirmed. “I don’t pretend to know why they wanted him sent away, but I do know he is dark. They wanted us to think she was real, that she was there to help the coven this entire time. I released her soul; her only warning was about Drake, but she vanished as Lucifer showed up and couldn’t tell me anything. I brought her journals back with me for the coven to look through. Maybe there is something inside them that will ease your guilt.”

“And you, you’re dark too!” she accused as she stood up and backed towards the door. I didn’t argue it or point out that I hadn’t fully accepted the darkness inside of me. The crystals had slowed it down, forcing it to remain dormant inside of me. I’d fought it hard when I’d first left Metaline Falls. I’d discovered information via the web and tried several things before I’d placed the crystals of purity into my flesh at every point that cast magic. “You could be with them, filling us full of lies, Lena. How can we trust you when you did this?” Her hands indicated all of me, as if all of me had turned against her.

“Fiona, calm down right now. She’s bound her life to ours in protection. She’s your daughter!”

“Is she? Because lately I don’t even recognize her anymore,” she cried as she left the room, slamming the door behind her.

“She didn’t mean that,” my grandmother mumbled as she stared at me with regret.

“Yes, she does,” I laughed soundlessly. “I hardly recognize myself anymore, either. I used to have it together. I knew what I wanted, and now everything is falling apart. Kendra is distant, and she refuses to speak to me now at all. Mother is right, I’ve changed.”

“We all have,” she huffed as she slipped her hand through mine. “Evolution does that to us; we adapt to what this world throws at us. The Fitzgeralds have withstood the test of time, but now we have one who carries the devil’s bastard, and another who is standing tall as she learns her fate. The women of this family have always held to the laws, but those laws often change because the world is always evolving. Now, let’s get this over with so I can go calm your mother.”

I held out my hand as it trembled. The knife sliced through my palm and I held my hand over the stoneware and made a fist, squeezing it into the dish. My heart leapt to my throat as we waited for the lines to move. The blood turned black, slowly combining with the ink inside the dish. It separated into a web, splitting and twisting until two vines moved, and I held my breath. The potion hardened, turning to a sand like substance, and the thick black blood branched off, and then stopped as the other continued to move.

“No,” I cried as tears formed in my eyes, running down my cheeks. “No, it’s wrong. It has to be, do it again!” I demanded breathlessly as my throat constricted and my stomach flipped as I stared down at the time sand, which refused to move.

“Dear Gods,” Grandmother whispered as a tear rolled down her cheek. Pain gripped my heart, as if someone had a fist tightening around it. She lifted the dish and shook it, and once more, the line refused to move. “No, oh, please, no,” she said as she set it down and tried to touch me.

I jerked my hand away from her as I lifted the dish and smashed it upon the floor. “No, no, that’s not fair! Not after everything I’ve been through.”

“We can help you, there has to be a way,” she whispered through mumbled words as she tried to hide her fears.

“No one else is to know, do you understand me?” I demanded.

“Lena, he’s the father. He may know how to help us.”

“He can’t know, ever. It is my right to withhold it; it’s my right, Grandmother. No one is to know; it doesn’t leave this room. Nothing that was revealed is to leave this room.”

“I can’t stop it alone,” she whispered as she wiped at the tears.

“No one can stop it, you know that. Fate can’t be changed, only altered, but in the end, it comes and you damn well know it. This stays between us. No one can change it, there’s no reason for them to even know. You know as well as I do that if the sands say it is going to happen, it will.”

I moved to the door, blindly leaving the room as tears fell. I rushed through the hallway, ignoring Spyder, who paused as I passed him. I didn’t want to see anyone. How could the Gods be so cruel? How could I be carrying Lucian’s child after I’d made a choice to save people I cared about? He’d said numerous times that he couldn’t have children, and yet here I was, pregnant with his child.

Once in the main room, I pushed through the crowd, ignoring my mother as she called my name over the music. I didn’t stop until I was inside the bedroom with the door closed. I slid down it until my ass touched the ground and my head leaned back, resting against the door. I hugged my knees as tears fell unchecked until my body trembled as I screamed with frustration.

I wasn’t an idiot. No child born of darkness would be accepted by the coven, no matter how much my family tried to make it otherwise. It would be no better than being born with leprosy.

Why me?

What sort of fucked up shit had I ever done to deserve this?

I pushed off the floor and headed to the bathroom, tearing my clothes off as I stared in the mirror at my stomach. I didn’t look pregnant, but then I’d missed my period twice now, which of course I’d blamed on stress. My hands slid over it, closing my eyes as I imagined what a child of his would look like. Would it have its father’s eyes, or mine? What would it be other than half of me? I glared at my reflection, knowing it was my fault. I’d been careless. I’d been so hyped on his fucking addictive kiss that I’d thrown caution to the wind once he’d said he couldn’t have children.

Turning on the water, I pulled out rose petals and dried lilacs before tossing them into the water. I sat on the edge of the tub, dipping my fingers through the water as the flowers swirled and I became lost in my thoughts.

Could I willingly bring a child into a world like this? What if everything Benjamin had said came to pass, or was true? With the world as it was, with the gates to the worlds opening, could I bring a defenseless being into this mess? Lucian would protect it, wouldn’t he? I mean, he’d have to, right? I stood up and slowly stepped into the tub.

I was pregnant. I was having his baby. We’d created life together, and he’d never know it. He didn’t need to, not with all of the cards falling into place, not with everything Benjamin had said would happen, happening. The sand was never wrong, ever.

I slid beneath the water, letting it fill my lungs until it burned. I stared up at the ceiling, watching the petals as they floated into my line of sight and out of it. Emotions ebbed and flowed like the ocean, crushing down on me until I sat up, sputtering as I coughed up the water.

The pregnancy was the least of my worries according to the sands, and I didn’t dare to think of it. Not now, not ever. The coven came first, it always had. I’d been immature when I’d returned to town, but sometime during coming home, and everything that happened. I wanted to be a mother. I wanted to hold my child in my arms, to feel its heart beating against mine.

I wanted to create life.

Fate was fickle at best, but this…this was a nightmare that I knew I wouldn’t awaken from. The coven needed refuge. The Guild wasn’t ready to house them yet, and even though Synthia had offered to take some, we all knew they couldn’t accommodate the masses. It needed the witches, we needed the shelter from the storm that was brewing as the gates of the other worlds began to open, letting even worse creatures into this one.

If we were going to stand a chance at winning, we had to combine forces, which meant they would need to start moving witches to it as it was finished. They didn’t have the numbers to fight yet, but we did. Together, maybe we could make a difference. This world needed us, even if we hid in the shadows. We kept the balance of magic alive through the bloodlines; we meant something.

It didn’t matter what fate was throwing at me, I’d find my own way around it. My grandmother had to remain unbiased; she had to think of the greater good. Humans were dying by the handful every minute that ticked by.

I rinsed off and wrapped a towel around me before strolling into the bedroom with puffy eyelids. I felt his power filling the room and peered into the shadows, watching as Lucian stepped forward.

“You want to explain what is going on?” he purred as his gaze slowly slid down my body.

“I don’t know what you mean,” I countered as I moved to my bags, which I’d packed once he’d left the room. His eyes didn’t miss a beat; he zeroed in on them and a dark brow lifted.

“Going somewhere?” he asked.

“Preferably to a room that doesn’t carry your scent,” I answered as I withdrew a pair of joggers and a tank top. “You shouldn’t have to give up your room, and I’m sure there’s somewhere else I can be moved to.”

“You’re not going anywhere. I like you in my room, Lena,” he said in a hoarse tone before he rolled his shoulders and spoke again. “What’s upset you?” he asked as he moved closer.

“And why would you think I’m upset?” I returned, irritated that it was written on my face from the red puffy eyes to the fat lip that I’d bitten so hard that it bled.

“You don’t cry in crowded rooms. You hold it in. You just ran through the entire club crying, Lena. So what has you so upset?” he asked softly.

“I’m fine,” I stated as I moved into the bathroom, dismissing him as coldly as he’d been dissing me. I didn’t see him for days, and now he seemed to be everywhere again.

I slipped on my panties and stared at the mirror as I imagined growing round with his babe inside of me. I shoved the image away, burying it as I finished dressing for bed. I pulled the tank top on and dried my hair, exiting the bathroom to find him sitting in the chair with his elbows resting on his knees as he stared me down.

“Do you need something?” I asked.

“I’m not leaving until you tell me what the fuck is going on with you,” he growled low and pointedly.

“I can’t add to my bloodline now,” I lied.

“Kendra is carrying on your line,” he said softly.

“Kendra is carrying Lucifer’s child,” I countered coldly, accusation tainting my tone. “You think they’ll give it our name?”

“Lucifer was an angel at one time, now he’s fallen. It doesn’t mean his child will be evil, Lena. It’s only a child.”

“And what about you, Lucian? Do want children?”

“No, never,” he snapped angrily. “I told you, I cannot have them, and therefore have never wished for one.”

“You should go, I’m tired,” I replied evenly, somehow managing not to break down into tears.

“Would it matter if I did?” he asked.

“No, not for me,” I stated slowly as I watched him stand and shove his hands into his pockets. “What we had is broken, so if you are thinking to fix it…”

“I didn’t come here to fix it,” he growled.

“What did I do wrong?” I asked offhandedly.

“Does it fucking matter?” he snapped. His gaze lingered on me and I lowered mine as I chewed my lip.

“No,” I replied before I continued. “If you knew someone you loved was going to die, and you could stop it, would you?”

“Yes.”

“What if it cost you everything? What if the price was more than you could pay?”

“There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to protect someone I love, even if that price was to walk away and pretend I didn’t care, Lena. Sometimes you have to die a little to save or protect those you care for, even at the cost of yourself.”

“Did you ever care for me, or was I just something you wanted to play with?” I asked softly as I lifted tear-filled eyes to his.

“Go to bed. You look exhausted, Lena,” he ordered, and I watched him stroll to the door and pause there, as if he’d planned to say something else. He stared at me for a long moment before he pulled the door closed behind him.