My dragon kept pushing at me, insisting that Alina was out there. That we had to go and bring her back. That it was the way things were meant to be.

I wished more than ever that I hadn’t gone with Pierce to kidnap Alina. It was difficult enough living without her. Knowing where she lived and how easy it would be for me to take her away turned my desire for her into an obsession. And the dragon wouldn’t shut up about it, no matter how I tossed and turned and struggled to get some sleep.

It was pointless to try. I had been battling insomnia ever since she left. For five nights, I’d struggled to get more than a few hours total. My mood was suffering as a result, along with my concentration. And my patience. It was at an all-time low.

I opened up my eyes and rolled onto my back, staring up at the ceiling. The only light in the room came from the touchscreen by the door, and even that was dim due to the time of night. There was nothing to see up there—not that there would be with the lights on, either—but that didn’t stop me from staring.

I saw her, or else I told myself I did. Her beautiful face. Smiling at me. It was good that she was smiling—normally, when I saw her in my mind’s eye she was looking at me with reproach. Hoping I would at least tell her I wanted her to stay.

Why hadn’t I at least told her I wanted it that way? It might have given her a little comfort, anyway. Instead, I sent her away without saying a word about what was in my soul. Because I was too much of a man for anything like that, and way too much of a dragon.

I sat up with a growl and swung my legs over the side of the bed. No sense in lying around for hours with nothing to show for it. I took a quick shower and slid into a pair of sweats before leaving the room. It was barely four in the morning, according to the display by the door. I could at least count on a little peace and quiet.

Or so I thought. There was noise coming from the game room—faint, but present. I guessed that meant it wasn’t one of the guys, since they couldn’t be quiet if their lives depended on it. That would leave only one other possibility. I hesitated. Did I want the reminder of Alina? Then again, it wasn’t like I could avoid Jasmine forever.

I entered the game room and found her sitting on the couch, legs drawn up under her, wrapped in a blanket. She was watching an old black-and-white movie. I recognized one of the actresses onscreen. Bette Davis. She was blind, or had just gone blind, and her friend was weeping in her arms. Jasmine sniffled, shoulders moving up and down as she cried right along with the girl on the screen.

She jumped when I cleared my throat. “You caught me,” she offered with a shaky, embarrassed smile. “Sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry for. I’m interrupting you. I’m the one who should apologize.”

But I wouldn’t, because the caves were my home and would always be my home. She was the visitor. I wondered how long it would take before I could think of her as living here for good.

She wiped her eyes with a sigh. “I don’t know why I do this to myself. Watching these movies when I know they’ll make me cry. I guess I was just looking for an excuse to get a little weepy.”

“I don’t think you need an excuse.” I sat in one of the club chairs which sat to the right of the couch.

“That’s true. I wish I knew how long it’ll take until I get used to her not being with me,” she whispered. “I sound like such a baby.”

“You don’t.”

“It’s funny. We could go days and days without seeing each other. She would be working in her room, or treating anyone who fell ill or hurt themselves. I would be sitting in on meetings, fighting with my uncle over clan business. We had our own distinct paths. It wasn’t like we were attached at the hip. And I was fine with that, you know? Eventually, we’d find each other again, and we’d catch up on what we’d missed. Why does not seeing her in five days bother me so much now?”

“You know why. Because there’s a finality to it.”

“Yes,” she whispered, staring up at the screen again but not really seeing it. “I know we’re not going to run into each other at breakfast in the banquet room. We won’t cross paths in the halls. It’s over.”

“I’m sorry you’re going through this.” And I was. It was no fault of mine or anyone else, but I was still sorry for her.

“I’m sorry for you,” she whispered, not looking at me.

“Excuse me?”

“I know you didn’t want her to go.”

“She had to go.”

“But you didn’t want her to.” She sneaked a glance at me. “I know you didn’t.”

“I… I knew it would hurt you…”

“Smoke. You don’t have to pretend. It’s all right to admit what’s happening inside. Don’t you know that?”

“It’s irrelevant,” I replied as my dragon roared to life.

The thought of opening up to a stranger was tantamount to torture. I didn’t even open up to my family. Why would I share my thoughts with her?

She shrugged, and was kind enough not to press the issue or even smile knowingly. “Fine. That’s all right. You don’t have to. Just know that if you ever want to, I’m here. I mean…” She jerked her head in the direction of the door. “I doubt any of the others are good listeners. Even Pierce.”

I chuckled. “That’s a diplomatic way of putting it.”

“I know you guys don’t exactly sit around, sharing your feelings, either.”

“That’s also true. It’s not how we’re built.”

“I get it. But it’s how I’m built. And I’m a good listener. So, as I said…” She got up, pulling the blanket tight around her, and picked up the tissue box.

It looked to be full of crumpled, tear-soaked tissues. How long had she been sitting there alone? Of course, it was Pierce’s night on duty. She would’ve had nobody to talk to if I hadn’t come out.

“Hey,” I offered as she was leaving. “If you ever need to talk and Pierce’s not around, you can find me. I’m not such a bad listener, myself.”

Her smile was warm, grateful. “Thank you.”

I took her place on the couch when I was alone and flipped through the hundreds of available channels. It amazed me that Jasmine found anything to watch in the middle of all the garbage that passed for television.

I remembered when it first came out, how thrilled we all were to have a little entertainment right there in our home. Granted, it took a little time to figure out how to get reception when the set was in the middle of a cave, but we’d experimented and improvised. It wasn’t like there was anything better to do when we didn’t have guard duty.

The one thing Cash and Miles told me about driving Alina home when I pressed them for details was how she’d guessed about the treasure.

I sure as hell had never told her about it, and Pierce swore he hadn’t told Jasmine exactly why we lived under the mountain.

How had she guessed? Because she was so damn smart, that was how. And smart enough to not mention what she’d guessed until she was already well on her way home. I had to give her credit for that. It would seem funny to an outsider, the way we guarded a treasure we had never seen and could never use even if we wanted to. Sometimes it even seemed funny to me.

I stopped myself right there, before I could go any further. That was the dragon doing my thinking for me, trying to sow discord so he could get what he wanted.

We cannot go out for her, and that’s final.

I was sure he would torture me to the end of my days, which made me wonder how much longer I would live. It wasn’t a life I was looking forward to if living meant spending night after sleepless night thinking about what I had lost.

I didn’t lose her, because I never had her to begin with.