Chapter Two
When Cassie opened her eyes the next morning, it almost felt like she was a new person as well as living in a new place. Sun streamed into her bedroom and she heard the birds singing just outside. Peace. How long had that been?
As she got dressed she contemplated the importance of where she was at right then. She wasn’t on the verge of taking the first step into her future. She’d taken it. And she was still moving ahead. For so long it had been about just surviving. It seemed monumentally scary to have her life be about living again.
Cassie decided to walk to Main Street, have breakfast and then deal with the car situation. Get to know the town a bit better.
While she was out she’d also look for a place with wi-fi so she could email Brian and check in. Or at the very least call him on a payphone. She hadn’t spoken with him since she left the hotel the morning before and she knew he’d be worried.
After she got some makeup on, she pulled her hair into a ponytail and made sure her shirt collar hid the scars at the back of her neck. It wasn’t until she’d locked the door that the heat hit her. Like a thick, wet blanket. If it was this bad now, she knew she needed to get out and finish her errands before noon.
The trees cast nice, cool shade as she began to walk. People out working in their yards actually waved hellos at her. And taking a deep breath, she waved back. She had to claim her life again.
Once on Main Street she crossed over to a little diner she’d seen the night before, The Sands. It was everything she’d imagined a small town diner to be when she walked inside. Crowded and full of people talking and laughing, waving to folks as they came and went. Steeling her nerves, Cassie slipped into a spot at the counter and grabbed a menu.
“Hiya, sug. You must be the pretty girl that Polly Chase ran into last night.”
Surprised, Cassie looked up into the face of a woman behind the counter. Big brown eyes sparked with good humor. Cassie couldn’t help but smile back.
“That’s me. I suppose this is my introduction to how fast news travels in a small town?”
The woman laughed and patted Cassie’s arm. “Now you’re catching on. I’m Ronnie Sands. I own this place.” She put a coffee cup in front of Cassie and filled it.
“I’m Cassie Gambol. Nice place you have here. I like it. Looks like I’m not the only one.” She ordered the pancake special and complimented Ronnie on the fresh juice.
Ronnie grinned. “Be right back with your pancakes. Welcome to Petal, Cassie.” Ronnie bustled off to help another customer.
“Well, you’re looking a mite better today.” Cassie turned to see Maggie Chase hop up into the chair next to her. “Although I don’t like those dark circles under your eyes. How are you feeling after last night?”
“I just need a few good meals and some rest. Thanks.” Cassie felt torn between the idea of actually making new friends and the vulnerability that created in her.
Damn it, she used to be so good at this. She had friends and a vibrant social life. She used to be a lot of things before Terry.
The woman who’d come in with Maggie leaned forward and smiled. “You must be the Cassie everyone is talking about. Hi, I’m Liv Davis. Nice to meet you.”
Ronnie came by, put a heaping plate of food in front of Cassie, took Maggie’s and Liv’s orders and hurried away.
Cassie waved back at Liv before digging into her breakfast. She’d forgotten what this kind of cooking tasted like. Terry had insisted on a cook to prepare low-fat meals based on his menu plans and when she wasn’t eating at home, she ate what she could grab at work. Hospital cafeterias weren’t known for their delicious meals.
“What brings you to Petal, Cassie?” Maggie asked.
Cassie knew the question would be asked again and all the way out from her brother’s she’d worked on the answer.
“I got tired of the big city. I wanted a change.” She shrugged. “One of my friends was here a few years ago, on his way through to Atlanta and he’s always gushed about it. So I checked it out on the internet and ended up talking to Chuck and rented the apartment.”
“I admire that. You just up and moved? Changed your life because you wanted to, that’s pretty amazing.” Maggie’s smile was genuine.
“Don’t. It’s not a big deal really. The city was killing me.” Or rather, someone in the city wanted to.
Maggie frowned a little before brightening again. “Well it’s most certainly admirable. What city did you come from?”
She and Brian decided it was good to keep close to the truth. Los Angeles was big enough that it shouldn’t ring any alarm bells. “LA.”
“And what are you going to do here? Do you have a job lined up?”
Well, she couldn’t be a surgeon anymore. Two of the fingers in her right hand had had the bones shattered so severely she’d never have the range of fine motor skills she’d need. Hell, she could barely hold a fork in her right hand for nearly half a year after she’d gotten out of the hospital. On top of that, she couldn’t practice under her new name without a whole lot of hassle and paperwork. Hassle and paperwork that would expose her. Futile rage swamped her for a moment. Terry had taken away her greatest love as well as her safety and nearly her life.
“No. I need to start looking.” She shoved it all away, not allowing him to own her fear or her anger. Her days of letting him control her were over.
“Well, what can you do? Any special talents? Maybe we can give you suggestions.” Maggie buttered her toast.
“Clerk, secretary, bookstore? Coffeeshop?” Cassie shrugged, trying not to resent Maggie’s apparent ease with herself and her surroundings.
“You know, I think Penny is looking for someone over at Paperbacks and More. You should pop in. She’s really nice, our age, I think it would probably be a really fun place to work. And wow—” Maggie leaned in close to Cassie “—where did you get those earrings? They’re gorgeous.”
Smiling, Cassie touched them. “Thank you. I made them.”
“You made those? Well they’re beautiful. You’re pretty talented, Cassie. Have you ever thought about selling them?”
“Funny you should mention that, I was thinking about it on the way here. Is there a craft market or flea market around here? I have a supply of things I’ve made that I’d love to sell on the odd weekend here and there.” At least she could still make jewelry with her hands.
“As a matter of fact, yes. There’s a Sunday Market. This is the first year for it but it seems to be doing pretty well. They close down Fourth Avenue, which is just a few blocks down. As it happens, our friend Dee is on the organizing committee. Here.” Maggie dug through her bag and pulled out a pen and paper. “This is her number. Give her a call and let me know because I’d love to buy some of your stuff.” Maggie grinned.
“Thank you, Maggie. I appreciate this.” Cassie paid for her breakfast, a little bit of hope in her belly along with the great food. “Ronnie, breakfast was excellent and the juice made me feel a lot better. I’ll be seeing you.”
“Wait, Cassie. Do you need a ride somewhere?” Maggie asked.
She’d had just about all the small talk she could take. Cassie just needed to be alone to think. “No, thanks. I noticed from the card that the mechanic is only a few blocks away. After I check in there I need to run errands. Nothing I can’t walk to and I need the exercise anyway. Thanks for the tip about your friend and the Market. Oh and do you know if there’s a place in town that has wireless internet access? My phone won’t be in until Monday and I haven’t even thought about internet service.”
“The Honey Bear. It’s a bakery at the other end of Main. We’d be happy to give you a lift.” Maggie’s friendly nature was earnest and unvarnished. Cassie had to admit to herself she liked that. There didn’t seem to be anything fake about her. The gorgeous best friend seemed nice too. But she wasn’t ready for hanging out with the girls just yet.
“Oh thanks, but I’d like to get to know the town a bit. I appreciate it.” Cassie backed away toward the door. “Have a great Saturday afternoon.”
And she was free again. Free to do whatever she wanted. The walk down Main Street was quite nice. There were a number of little businesses along the way. A few cafés and specialty shops dotted the sidewalk. The town seemed to be thriving.
The mechanic shop was busy but when she walked in one of the men stopped what he was doing and came over to help her. “You must be Cassie. I’d shake your hand but I don’t want to get you dirty. I’m Art.”
Okay, so it was odd but she was getting used to everyone knowing who she was. Definitely not something she experienced a lot back home. “Yep, I’m Cassie. Nice to meet you. Just came in to check on my car. How is it?”
“Well, that big old Caddy is a menace. She’s whacked your rear axle out of alignment and it’s cracked. I’ve called in an order for the parts but I won’t see them until Monday. The rest isn’t too bad. The body work shouldn’t take too very long and we can do the paint job here. But I wouldn’t count on having a vehicle for another week or so. Do you need a rental? We have two on site. Polly’s insurance will cover it.”
Cassie laughed. “Everyone in town seems to be familiar with her insurance and what it covers.”
“Well yes.” Art blushed. “She’s gotten into a few fender benders. But she really is a nice woman.”
“So I’m told. And yes, I’ll need a car if I won’t have one for at least another week.”
He completed the paperwork and she drove off half an hour later to the grocery store. But when she parked, she saw the small bookstore just a few doors down and decided to head over and check out the job lead.
“Miss Gambol.”
Shit. The giant hottie of a sheriff came walking toward her. Stalking, like something big and bad but graceful too.
“Sheriff.”
His eyes didn’t miss anything on their slow circuit of her body. She knew that he knew she was holding back. “Please, call me Shane. How are you doing today?”
She resisted the urge to shift from foot to foot. “I’m all right. Just a bit sore. But I’ve got a rental and Art is taking care of my car.” She shrugged. Cassie tried not to think about how his skin was so work-hard and firm and nicely sunkissed. She smelled him from where she stood. A bit of cologne, man and clean sweat.
Cassie doubted she looked as good. The heat made her skin feel clammy and her hair most likely hung like a limp rag. She chewed her lip, knowing the lipstick she’d applied first thing was gone. And then she smacked herself for even thinking it. No way. No more controlling men with power issues. And clearly this one had that in spades. He took up far more of the sidewalk than he physically occupied. His presence was overwhelming. And certainly he’d be hot in bed, but she was not going to find out. Oh no. Not her. She wouldn’t even think about how he’d look naked and laid out on her sheets waiting for her. Damn. Were vibrators legal in Georgia? Yeah, she’d need to look that up online.
He was talking and she blushed when she realized she’d lost half of what he’d said. “I’m sorry. I missed part of that.”
He smiled, with white predator’s teeth. Oh my. Okay, thinking about sex again! Stop it!
“I was saying that you should be on the lookout for a visit from my mother. She’s still upset over what happened last night and she wants to make it right. Which means she’ll hound you until you let her. I suggest you don’t try to resist. It’s pointless anyway. She might be small but she handles four very big sons with one hand tied behind her back.”
Suddenly he was so charming he totally disarmed her and she laughed. “I see. Like the Borg? Only with big hair and a bigger handbag?”
He cocked his head and grinned. “You got it. You settling in all right? Can I help you with anything? You shouldn’t move any of that furniture so soon after the accident. I’d be happy to help.” Her heart sped up as his gaze pulled her in. He was thinking something naughty wasn’t he? Or maybe she was projecting.
Wetting her lips nervously, she shrugged. “I’m sure I’ll be all right. Thanks.”
His long pause alarmed her until he blinked slowly and cleared his throat. “Uh, okay. Well, I have to go. It was nice seeing you again. You be sure to call me at the station or go and get Matt if you need anything, all right?”
“Thanks again.” Stepping back from his body made her feel a bit better. She could breathe without smelling his skin. It had to be the heat that made her feel so lightheaded.
With a wave she steered around him and headed into the bookstore, leaving him standing there, watching her.
Shane unfisted his hands as he took in her sway before she disappeared into Paperbacks and More. Nervous as a cat that one. Why? And where in hell did the persistent need to protect her come from? She was in his town carrying something she didn’t want him to know about with her. That made her a threat. But he didn’t see a threat when he looked at her.
He saw the shadow of fear in her eyes. He saw the lines of stress around her mouth. And what a mouth. That mouth of hers was made for kissing and other things he shouldn’t be thinking about doing with a woman like Cassie Gambol.
He’d done a quick check on her that morning when he’d gotten to work. Not much to be found and that made him nervous. No one got to be their age without something. No speeding tickets, no fingerprints on file, he didn’t find anything about her in any newspapers from Southern California either. It was like she just came into being a few weeks before. A woman built for a hell of a lot of naughty fantasies, made from smoke with fear in her eyes.
In his town. And if he had any say in it, he’d find out who the heck she was and what she carried so close to the vest.
* * *
Cool air hit her skin as Cassie walked into Paperbacks and More. Being away from Shane and out of the heat, she found she could finally breathe again. Wandering through the store, she noted the cozy seating areas in the different sections and a good variety of genres. It was bigger than she’d thought it would be. The kind of bookstore she’d have found herself in every payday back in college.
Finally, she sighted the counter and smiled at the woman standing behind it. “I’m looking for Penny.”
“You found her.” The woman, dressed smart in a lightweight summer skirt and blouse, looked Cassie up and down. “Hmm, you don’t look like an IRS agent and my personal relationship with the Lord is my business.”
Cassie laughed and put her hands up in surrender. “I’m Cassie Gambol and I’m not peddling anything. Well, that’s not entirely true. I’m looking for a job. I’m new here in Petal and Maggie Chase said you might be looking for someone.”
“You ever worked in a bookstore before?”
“Back when I was in high school and then later when I was in college.”
“Who’s your favorite author?”
“What a question. How can I just name one? That’s impossible.”
Penny grinned. “Well, I must say that’s a very good answer to start with. Okay, who are your five favorite authors?”
“Margaret Atwood, Isaac Asimov, Frank Herbert, Nora Roberts—and I’ll snag JD Robb while I’m at it since they’re the same person—and Barbara Kingsolver.”
Penny’s eyebrow rose. “Nice group there. Okay then, so of those authors—give me your favorite book by each.”
“Hmm, for Atwood it’s a tie between Handmaid’s Tale and Cat’s Eye. Asimov would be Foundation. Frank Herbert? Children of Dune. Nora—and you know that’s a hard one—but Born in Fire. JD Robb’s Naked in Death. I just love the beginning of Eve and Roarke. And Barbara Kingsolver’s Bean Trees.”
Penny Garwood knew people. She could do a resume check on the woman standing in front of her. Would do. She may trust her gut but she wasn’t a moron. Still, she knew it would be fine. Her gut told her that Cassie Gambol was a good woman and would be a darned good employee. And Penny always went with her intuition. It’d never proven her wrong. And there was no doubt that the men would be coming into the store in droves just to get a look at her.
“Okay. When can you start, Cassie Gambol?”
“Are you kidding me? Really? Just like that?”
Penny couldn’t remember the last time anyone had looked that overjoyed to be offered a job in a bookstore. The woman didn’t look hard up for money, but looks could be deceiving.
“I have a rule, I listen to my gut. My gut says to hire you so I will. We’ll start you on a trial basis. I’ll give you a week. If it works out, I’ll make you permanent. If it doesn’t, no harm done. Let’s start you part-time for now. We’re open from noon to five on Sundays. Why don’t you come on in tomorrow and we’ll set up your schedule?”
Cassie offered her hand and Penny took it. “Thank you so much. I’ll be here tomorrow at noon. You won’t be sorry for taking a chance on me.”
“Make it eleven-thirty. Come around the back. We’ll get your paperwork done first and I’ll give you a bit of a run-through before we open.”
“You got it. Thank you again.” Heart light and a smile on her face, Cassie headed out and back across the street to the grocery store.
It wasn’t that she needed the job. Brian had changed her trust to pay blind to an account that fed into Switzerland and then back to her new name. Her father would have been heartbroken to know what a mess her marriage to Terry had turned out to be. But the money he’d left her when he died enabled her to run. Enabled her to get into the program to change all her identification like her social security number and name. Gave her a chance at a new life.
But she wanted to work. Wanted to do something with her time. Yes, she grew up with money but she’d worked from a very early age and it felt uncomfortable to not have some kind of major activity in her life other than being afraid. Working at a bookstore and making her jewelry wasn’t the intricate and lifesaving vascular surgery she’d performed for the last four years, but it was something to help her take a step to move on with her life. And that’s what she meant to do.
Matt Chase unfolded himself from his place, lying in a hammock in the shade of the big oak tree in the yard, when she pulled up. He was a work of masculine art. They sure did grow them handsome down in Georgia.
“Hey there, Cassie. Need some help?”
He ambled over and it was impossible not to notice the long, tanned legs in the cutoff jeans and the flat, tight belly peeking from under the hem of his T-shirt.
Pulling out a few bags and balancing them she smiled, she knew it was just a bit thin at the edges. “Oh no, that’s okay. It’ll just take me two trips. Thank you, though.”
But as she began to walk up the steps, she heard him grab the remaining bags and follow her up. “Now it won’t take you another trip.” He breezed past her into the apartment and put the bags on her kitchen counter before leaning a hip against it and watching her.
“Thank you. It really wasn’t necessary.”
“I know. It wouldn’t have been neighborly if I’d been required to do it. I was just goofing off and taking a nap.”
He seemed nice enough, he truly did. But having him in her apartment with the door closed began to make her feel queasy. She didn’t know him. He could be anyone and scary often had a pretty face.
She took a step back and he noticed. Concern spread over his handsome face. “Cassie? You all right?”
“I...the heat, I need to cool down and rest.” She went to the door and opened it up, gripping the jamb tight. She wanted to gulp the air, try to breathe in the calm but it wasn’t working. “Thanks again for helping with my groceries, Matt. I appreciate it.” The shaking was coming, she could feel it and she clenched her teeth.
“Are you all right, Cassie? Did I do something wrong?” Matt stopped very close to her but didn’t touch her. Still, the fine tremors in her hands hit.
“Please. Just go. I’m not feeling well.”
“I...just bang on the wall please if you need me.” He backed out of the door and onto the landing. She slammed and locked it, sinking to the floor as her legs would no longer hold her up.
Her teeth began to chatter as the shakes came. Her breath exploded in sobs and she curled into a ball and closed her eyes, letting it wash over her. She knew it was useless to fight it once it got that far so she rode it out.
After a time, she sat up, her muscles still rubbery and slightly sore from the shaking and sobbing. Ordering herself to buck up, she stood up, bracing her weight on the door until she could stand on her own, and went to splash some water on her face.
Moving tentatively, she put her groceries away as her body and spirit regained control over itself. It was then that she remembered she hadn’t gotten in contact with Brian and she knew he’d be climbing the walls with worry by then.
She didn’t want to leave the house. She wanted to stay inside and hide. But she couldn’t. She wouldn’t. Instead, she grabbed her keys and her wallet, and headed out to the payphone she’d noticed earlier that day outside the grocery store.
But Shane Chase was waiting at the bottom of her stairs and she recoiled for a moment. Damn! He noticed that.
“Oh, Sheriff Chase. You surprised me.” She tried to be nonchalant and force herself to go down the stairs but she froze three quarters of the way down because he remained standing at the bottom of the landing, effectively blocking her way. Making her feel trapped.
“Shane. Please. And you want to tell me why the very sight of me scared you?” His voice had an edge she couldn’t quite place. “Matt said you had a panic attack earlier when he was at your place. Why don’t you tell me what’s going on? I can help you.”
Anger replaced the fear and she pushed her way past him and down the walk. “I’m on my way out, Shane.”
He moved his body to halt her progress and the fear was back at the edges of her anger. “What are you hiding?”
“Sheriff, you’re blocking my way. And anyway, what’s it to you? I haven’t done anything wrong unless panic attacks are illegal in Georgia.” Her voice shook a bit, mortifying her even more but thank goodness he stepped out of the way.
“I’m sorry I scared you. I don’t know why you’re afraid but I can’t help you if you won’t let me.” Hands held loosely at his side, he kept his voice calm and low and she felt like an animal all of a sudden. A cat spooked in a treetop. When had her life become so out of her control?
Oh how she wanted to tell him. To give it all to someone else and let them fix it for her. But that wasn’t possible. No one could protect her but herself. And the last thing she needed was another big, dominant man who thought he could run her life far more efficiently than she could.
“I’m fine. Now if you’ll excuse me.” She walked around him, got into the car and pulled away, leaving him standing there, watching her go.
Matt waited on his landing as Shane came up the stairs. “Something has spooked that woman big time.” Matt waved his brother inside and handed him a soda.
“I’d wager it was a man. Some asshole who beat her up a time or two. Maybe a daddy.” Shane took a sip and sat down on the couch. “Either that or she’s running from the law. I checked her out and she’s clean but it’s not like fake identification is a foreign concept to criminals.”
“I don’t think so, Shane. She doesn’t come off as the kind of woman who’s hiding something from others because of what she’s done.”
Shane nodded at his brother. His stomach clenched as he remembered the look on her face when she’d looked down the steps at him. No, that wasn’t the face of a woman hiding from a drug charge. That was the face of a woman who’d been hurt by someone and was afraid it would happen again. No woman had ever looked at him like that and it bothered him deeply that she would be afraid of him.
That nagging protective feeling was back. “I think you’re right. I think it’s an ex. She didn’t seem to have a problem being alone with Maggie or when she was with us all in her apartment. But men alone? You should have seen her reaction when she walked out and saw me on my way up the stairs to her place. She flinched. There’s something bad there and I aim to find out what it is.”
“I told you, she started shaking when I was at her apartment. I could hear her sobbing for breath after I left. I’m worried about her.”
“Are you now?” Shane’s eyes narrowed at his brother. “Leave that to me. It’s my job and she’s not going to tell us anything at this point. I just need to show her we’re the good guys and hopefully she’ll come to trust me...us, in time.”
Matt raised a brow. “Oh, so that’s how it is? You staking a claim?”
“I just want to help. I’m a cop, it’s what I do.” Shane paused and Matt made a rude noise.
“Puhleeze. Shane, I’ve known you my whole life. That look on your face says there’s a lot more than your cop-type duty on the line here.”
Shane started to argue but groaned instead, shaking his head. “Damn it, there’s something about her. You should have seen how pissed off she got out there. First she’s totally freaked and then I say something that makes her mad and she’s spitting and hissing. She’s...” Shane shrugged his shoulders. “But if you had your eye on her...oh hell, even if, unless you want to have some serious competition, you’d best back up and let me at her. That juxtaposition of timid ferocity gets to me. I can’t say I’ve ever been this intrigued before.”
Matt threw back his head and laughed. “Well, she’s a looker. And those big blue eyes are haunted. But I’m still stinging over my breakup with Liv. I don’t think I’m ready right now. But I do want to help Cassie. So I’ll keep an eye on her.”
“I’m sorry things didn’t work out between the two of you. I thought Liv was the one.”
“Yeah. Me too. But after nearly a year of dating, she wanted to move to the next level and I just wasn’t ready after all. I can’t blame her for moving on. I look at Kyle and Maggie and I know that if I’d truly loved Liv, I’d have asked her to move in or marry me long before a year passed.” Matt cocked his head. “Cassie may be able to get spitting mad at you but I don’t think she’s the plaything type. Don’t play with her. I don’t think she can handle it. And she deserves more.”
Shane’s lips tightened as he stood up and began to pace. “Hey, fuck you, okay? I don’t play with women, Matt. I’m just not serious about them. I’ve made mistakes, I grant you that. But I have no intentions of harming Cassie Gambol. She’s different. She moves me and I want to know more. A lot more.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I should be running for the door right now, looking to hook up with a woman who’ll make me forget those eyes. But she makes me want to stick around. I think I’m in trouble.”
* * *
Standing in the payphone she’d spied earlier that day in the grocery store parking lot, Cassie punched in the numbers and waited for Brian to pick up. The shaking had finally abated but the aftereffects of the attacks always left her feeling off balance.
“Hello?”
“Hey, B. I’m here safely.”
“I was ready to get on a plane and come looking for you. Why didn’t you call me last night? Is everything okay?”
“My phone won’t be hooked up until Monday. And I got into a small fender bender and my car is in the shop but yeah, everything is okay. I got a job.”
“Already? Great news. Doing what?”
She told him about the bookstore and the five favorite authors question. “She’s giving me a week’s trial and if she likes me, she’ll make me permanent. Who’d have thought I’d be so excited about something like this?”
“You’ve been through an awful lot. Of course something like this job is exciting. You’re claiming your life. Now, a fender bender? Did the new identification work?”
“I guess so. The sheriff hasn’t arrested me yet. And it was his mother who hit me. Rear-ended me at a red light. I’m all right but my car needs some TLC. My furniture arrived and there are people coming out of the woodwork to offer me help. It’s all very stereotypical Southern small town here. Lots of people calling me miss and ma’am and going out of their way to be nice. It’s odd. Disconcerting and yet, it feels nice.”
“Did you tell them?”
“Hell no. That’s my past. I mean, they offer to drive me places and move my furniture, that sort of thing. The sheriff has taken it into his head to try and save me. He’s like nine feet tall and four feet wide. I’m wagering he was the quarterback in high school. In any case, I’ll have to disabuse him of the notion that I need saving.”
Brian laughed. “Honey, you can let people in, you know. You haven’t done anything wrong. There’s nothing for you to be ashamed of and he won’t find you. Maybe telling the sheriff is a good thing, he can keep an eye on you.”
“You just said Terry won’t find me so why do I need an eye kept on me?” And she was ashamed. She knew she shouldn’t be but she was. She had graduated at the top of her class and yet she’d let a man in her life who’d estranged her from her family and had nearly killed her. He’d taken away one of her greatest passions when he used a hammer to shatter the bones in her fingers. How she let things get that far, and more than once, was still something she didn’t understand. And if she didn’t how could she expect others to?
“You going to see that doctor they recommended? The one in Shackleton?”
“Yes, she has evening hours and I have an appointment on Wednesday night. I suppose I’ll need to clear it with my job.”
“You promised you’d go. She’s a specialist with domestic violence survivors, Car—Cassie. Don’t break that promise.”
Closing her eyes, Cassie leaned her head against the cool glass of the enclosure. “I won’t. I promised and I’ll see it through. Even though I don’t need it.”
“No one can live through what you did without needing some help.”
“It was a year ago.”
“Yes and you spent months in the hospital. You were in a coma for three weeks. They weren’t even sure you’d be able to use your right arm again. And then the trial and the fuckups. You need someone who can help you process it all. You’ve just been existing for the last year. Hell for the last several years.”
“Fat lot of good the trial did when they found him guilty and he’s out there free.” Free and filled with violence and the need for revenge. She shivered against the ninety plus degree heat. Fear made her cold.
“I know, Cassie. I know. It’s wrong. But you’re alive and safe and damn it, you need to claim your life again and live. Get a boyfriend, go on dates, neck at the movies. If you like this town, buy yourself a house and settle there. When they catch him, I won’t have to hide when I come and see you. Or you can come back here.”
The mere idea of a life where she could have those things mocked her. Could she? Could she be normal and have friends and a boyfriend? A life where she didn’t weigh every word and action out of fear? It seemed like such a ridiculous fantasy, rage bubbled up within her. But she didn’t want to unleash it on her brother, who’d been her rock through everything. “I have to go. I need to get home and get some dinner. I’ll email you and call you with my new info once my phone gets hooked up on Monday. Thank you, Bri. I love you.”
“Good. Then you won’t be mad when the cell phone I just bought for you shows up at your place early next week. You need one and it drives me nuts that you don’t have one.”
Cassie sighed. “Fine. Thank you. You’re pretty peachy keen as big brothers go.”
“I should have done more. I should have seen it. I’m sorry.”
“Stop. Damn it, stop! Hell, I lived it and I didn’t see it. Not all the time. Not until it was too late. But it’s over. And I’m alive and you’re alive and we’re okay.”
“I love you. Take care of yourself. You’d better call me on Monday when you get that phone working.”
“I promise.”
Before she got in her car, she went into the store and bought a gallon of chocolate chip ice cream.