Prologue

***8 years ago***

Sitting up on the bed, Olivia didn’t know whether to feel annoyed or vindicated as Travis pulled his pants on, his movements jerky and his expression proclaiming him to be both huffy and indignant.

“You’re such a hypocrite,” she said, her voice sharp with displeasure. “You want to put your whole dick in my ass, but one finger in yours, you cum like a rocket, and instead of thanking me for the incredible orgasm, you’re pouting like a five year old.”

“I’m not… I can’t… I’m straight, Olivia!”

She looked down at her tits and pussy, which she hadn’t bothered to cover up since being naked in front of her boyfriend (very possibly her now ex-boyfriend) wasn’t exactly anything new. “Well, I haven’t grown a penis, so now I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“You can’t just put your finger in my ass and expect me to like it!”

“But you did like it,” she said, exasperated. The truth was, she had too until he’d totally freaked out about it. The noises he’d made, the way he’d shuddered and cried out in ecstasy, the sense of power it had given her to make him lose control the way he had… she’d loved it.

Travis’ face turned beet red, his surfer-blonde hair flopping in his eyes as he shook his head in disbelief.

“We’re not doing it again. Ever.”

Groaning, Olivia finally got up and started gathering up her clothing too. T-shirt, jean shorts, bra, undies. She ignored Travis’ unhappy muttering as she got dressed, taking a hairband out of her pocket to pull her long red hair back into a no-nonsense ponytail. Fully dressed, she finally turned back to her boyfriend of close to a year, pursing her lips as she studied his mutinous expression and defensive posture.

He was a good looking guy. She liked his long blonde hair and broad shoulders, the muscles he’d acquired from playing football for the university, and the easy smile he usually had. She liked that he was always happy to let her do her own thing. If she didn’t feel like going to a party, he sometimes went by himself or sometimes they’d do something else together, but he never tried to push her on anything that wasn’t really important to him. He didn’t mind her independent nature, he followed the rules of her apartment when he was there, and he liked her forthright and blunt personality. At least, he normally did. 

Unfortunately, all of that wasn’t enough. 

The sex was mostly boring. Unsatisfying. While he was happy to have her ride him, the effort he put in the rest of the time felt minimal and he always took it as a personal insult when she tried to bluntly tell him what she liked or didn’t like. Then he’d brought up anal sex and, while she hadn’t been excited about it, she’d agreed as long as he let her finger his ass first. It seemed like a fair trade to her.

Olivia sighed. “Travis… I don’t think this is working out.”

His blue eyes bulged almost comically. “Are you breaking up with me?”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Can you honestly say you’re happy with how our relationship has been going recently?”

“I can’t believe this,” he said, sounding totally flummoxed as he started pacing back and forth, completely ignoring her question. Which was also very annoying. “You put your finger in my ass, and now you’re breaking up with me.”

Hands on her hips, Olivia did her best to rein in her growing impatience with his immaturity. Yeah, she was a little sad to be ending things, but not as sad as she probably should be considering how long they’d been together. Another sign that it was definitely time to end the relationship, as far as she was concerned.

“Would you prefer to break up with me instead?” she asked, sarcastically.

“Yes!”

Ugh. Whatever.

“Fine, you broke up with me,” she said, sighing and closing her eyes so she didn’t have to look at him. She didn’t mean to be cold, but really? He was acting like a child. Sometimes she found his immaturity and willingness to be led endearing, but other times it was just a trial. Like right now. “I think you should probably go now.”

Travis stared at her like she was a circus act. “You know what your problem is, Olivia? You’re a control freak! You can’t be happy unless you’re controlling everything and everyone around you! You’re like a dominatrix, except not as much fun!”

Then he flounced out.

Okay, he didn’t actually flounce, but he might as well have.

Olivia glanced at her clock. Well, looked like her day was totally free now.

She found herself wandering over to her computer. Less than a minute later she was typing “Dominatrix” into the search engine.

If they were having more fun than she’d been having with Travis (and pretty much all her other ex-boyfriends), she might as well check out what it really meant to be one. Couldn’t hurt, right?

******

***5 Years Ago***

Luke recoiled in astonishment.

“She said what?”

Mercy cringed, her expression sympathetic. “Look, I wouldn’t have told you, but you insisted you wanted to know the real reason. Obviously I don’t know, it’s just what she said.”

He had. At least, he thought he had wanted to know, until Mercy—his ex-girlfriend Samantha’s best friend—had actually told him. When he’d run into her at the grocery store, he hadn’t been able to help asking why Samantha had broken up with him the previous month. The real reason. It wasn’t that he was heartbroken exactly, not anymore, but he’d thought they’d been moving towards something serious after five months together and instead she’d started drawing away and then dumped him. Mercy had always been bluntly honest, a trait he’d liked about her, and he’d practically begged her to tell him the truth until she’d given in. He’d just wanted to know what he’d done wrong so he could fix it in the future.

But how was he supposed to fix being boring in bed? Their sex life had started to wane, but it hadn’t been bad. At least, he hadn’t thought so. They had sex. She orgasmed. Unless she was faking it? Self-doubt surged. His shoulders hunched.

“Well it’s not like she was exciting either,” he grumbled defensively. Dammit, he’d tried to please Samantha in bed. Even if she hadn’t always been very helpful about communicating whether or not she liked what he was doing. He shoved his hands in his pockets, feeling vulnerable and… well, just not good. “I would ask her what she liked or if she wanted me to do anything different and she always just said it was fine. And it was fine for me too, but not exciting.”

Still looking sympathetic, Mercy patted him on the shoulder. “I think you two were just looking for different things in… in that area. Or, maybe the problem is you were both looking for the same thing. Sam’s not always great at communicating, I know, but one of the things she wanted was for you to stop asking and just do.”

Luke wanted to throw his hands up in the air in exasperation. “So I was just supposed to read her mind?”

“No, but… look, have you ever heard of kink? Look up kinky books on your e-reader and read some of those, and I think you’ll figure it out. You’re a good looking guy Luke, and you’re pretty awesome. You two just didn’t jive in the bedroom; it happens.”

Part of him didn’t want to follow Mercy’s advice about checking out kinky books, because he was still annoyed Samantha couldn’t have just told him what she wanted or what she found so boring about sex with him, but after about a week he couldn’t help himself. If it would stop the constant thoughts and self-doubt running around his head, what could it hurt?

After about a week he finally gave in and went searching for ‘kinky books.’ There were plenty available for free. Not that he couldn’t afford to buy a few books, but he was still feeling pretty resentful and the idea of purchasing books to explain exactly how he’d been lacking in the bedroom only made him more so.

He didn’t have much time for reading, but it didn’t take too long to figure out what Mercy had been talking about. Samantha had wanted some guy to boss her around, maybe spank her or even tie her up. She’d hinted at wanting him to take charge a few times and he’d tried to oblige, because he’d wanted to please her, but he hadn’t found those sessions particularly hot or fun for him. He definitely hadn’t ever spanked her or tied her up, and he’d only taken charge when she’d made it clear that was what she’d wanted. While he didn’t hate all of the ideas, it sounded exhausting being the one constantly in charge. He was in charge all day at work, keeping track of all sorts of minutiae. His favorite times were when he could set down all the work of running a construction business and just do the actual construction. When he had sex, he didn’t want to be constantly in charge. He just wanted to have sex. Maybe have someone else tell him what to do.

So Mercy was right. If Samantha wanted to hand over control in the bedroom to someone else, then he and his ex would like the same thing. Unfortunately, in this case, wanting the same thing made them incompatible. Sighing, Luke had put down the e-reader. There were women in the some books who took charge, which sounded hot, but he hadn’t the slightest idea of how to find one.

He liked a bossy woman, which was why Samantha had appealed to him, but apparently even the bossy ones didn’t want to be bossy in the bedroom. Which, made sense to him, but then how was he supposed to find one who did? 

Since he had a big contract coming up, one which could really set him up to move into a more expensive market downtown, Luke pushed all of his personal life problems aside. He’d just focus on work for now and figure the rest out later.