Nicholas

 

 

"Thank you for letting me pick you up at your place."

Her gaze shifts from the back of the driver's head to my face. We're in the backseat of a sedan, part of the fleet from the car service I use on occasion. I'm apt at getting around the city via Uber or public transportation but tonight is special. I knew Sophia would wear something memorable; something that deserved a heated seat and a comfortable headrest.

She looks breathtaking. Her dress is a deep royal blue, her heels nude. She's left her hair down and the entire image is mesmerizing. If this dinner weren't as important to her as I know it is, I'd have taken her to her bedroom as soon as I arrived at her place.

"We can go back there after dinner." Her eyebrows wiggle. "I have something to show you."

I inch my hand up her thigh, pushing the fabric of her dress with it. "Do you keep it under here?"

Her gaze falls on my hand. "Do you want to touch me now?"

I want to fuck her now. I have a condom in the inner pocket of my suit jacket. All I need to do is tell the driver to circle the park while I pull Sophia onto my lap and fuck her sweet body until sweat dots her upper deep red lip. The only separation between the driver and us would be a thin plastic partition.

"I'd fuck you now if you'd agree to it."

She inches her ass on the seat. "Have you done that before? Have you screwed a woman in the back of a car like this?"

She was a fan, drunk on the attention I gave her at a book signing. It was an early summer evening in a car that was taking me to the airport in Dallas. I invited her along for the ride and fucked her while her face was pressed against the sticky fake leather of the seat. I never knew her name.

"Don't ask me that."

"I'll take that as a yes." She raises the corner of her mouth in a challenge. "Where else have you had sex?"

"Sophia." My tone is low. It's a warning. "We agreed that we wouldn’t discuss past lovers."

I wait for her to bring up the fact that I now know every detail about the life of one of her former boyfriends, Franco Abano.

"We're adults." She checks her watch. "We won't be at Gabriel's for at least ten minutes so let's talk about what we did and didn't like with our past lovers."

I don't want to. I can't imagine a scenario where discussing the intimate details of sex with another woman will end well. Sophia has a jealous streak whether she'll attest to it or not. It's what lured her down from the balcony at Veil East. She saw me talking to Penny. She envisioned the two of us fucking and she decided to put a stop to it. It's as simple as that.

"I won't discuss the women I've slept with, Sophia. That's all in my past."

She huffs. "You don't have to tell me their names or how you rate them. I'm asking what you liked doing with them."

Everything she can imagine and more. "Where is this coming from?"

Her eyes skim over the front of my pants before they level on my face. "You like having sex in places where you can get caught."

"Do I?" I bark out a laugh. "I'm an exhibitionist now?"

"You said you'd fuck me on the Ferry and just now you wanted to fuck me in this car. You have a condom in your pocket, don’t you?"

I won't lie to her. "I do."

"I've never done those things." She lowers her voice to a whisper. "I don't know if I ever could."

Restless, I move to touch her hand, but she pulls it back. "Sophia, don't assume anything about me."

"If you need a woman in your life who will fuck you in the middle of the day on the Brooklyn Bridge, I'm not her."

"I need you." I lean forward on the seat so I can look at her directly. "If I have a driving need to fuck in public it's because I crave you constantly. I want you every second of the day."

The only response I get is silence.

"For the record, anything I've ever done with a woman in my life isn't even a memory worth holding onto at this point. I want you. I want us to be together, alone when we make love." I push her hair behind her ear to get a better view of her profile. "I cherish you, Sophia. That condom is for later. You told me you hadn't allowed many people into your apartment, so I assumed you wouldn't have protection there."

"If we never have sex in a public place, you're all right with that?"

I am. The few times I've done it has been exciting but they've been nothing compared to being with her. "Completely."

Her shoulders ease back into the seat. "That's the last time we'll talk about the past."

It's not. At some point, we need to have a discussion about that fucked up asshole, Franco Abano. It's just not happening tonight.

 

***

 

Cruel irony is a part of life that no one can prepare for. As I walked into the foyer of Gabriel Foster's lavish penthouse, my mind was focused on one person. A man from Sophia's past. I was reading a text from Crew about Franco Abano when I heard a familiar voice from across the room.

My past was standing in the center of a large living area with a glass of wine in her hand and a tall, bearded man by her side. Her long red hair looked just as it did that day eight years ago when I ran past her at the top of the staircase of her home in search of her sister.

Lilly Parker, Briella's sibling, is here.

We haven't spoken since the joint funeral where she was forced to say goodbye to her sister, her two brothers and her mother. We never mentioned her father in our conversations but I knew that she mourned the loss of him too. It wasn't the loss of his life but the loss of the trust she had in him.

"Lilly," I whisper her name knowing she can't hear me. Sophia does.

"That's Briella's sister," she says it matter-of-factly as if the pain that bonds Lilly and I doesn't exist. It's the reason we've never sought each other out. I can't look at her and not see Briella in the contour of her jaw or the color of her eyes. She can't look at me and not see the promise of the future that her sister lost.

"Sophia." A petite, obviously pregnant woman approaches us. "This must be Nicholas."

My eyes dart to the other room and Lilly. She's still so engrossed in her conversation that she doesn't notice our presence.

Sophia reaches to hug the woman. "Isla, this is Nicholas Wolf."

Isla Foster's face immediately blushes red. "I'm your biggest fan. I know people say that to you every single day but they're all liars. I have read every book you've ever written at least nine times.""I'm flattered," I say as I look at her face. She's pretty, young, her eyes a shade of blue similar to Sophia's.

"I can get you a drink." She grabs my hand. "I bought the brand of scotch Deacon drinks in Burden's Proof. I thought it must be a shout-out to your favorite. "

It was a subtly placed sponsor ad meant to drum up business for a failing liquor company. That was the brainchild of Cheyenne. I have no idea if their sales increased. I doubt it since they haven't contacted us for a new deal. "That'll be fine."

Sophia shoots me a look. "Can you give us a minute, Isla? I have to ask Nicholas something."

Disappointment wages war with confusion on her face. "I'll be in the kitchen getting a scotch and a glass of red wine for you, Sophia."

When she's finally out of earshot, Sophia tugs on the lapels of my suit jacket, so I turn until my back is to Lilly. "We can leave, Nicholas. If you don't want to talk to her, we can go."

I've run from my past for eight years. I've avoided Lilly at social gatherings. On the anniversary of Briella's death, I've always stayed offline. There are too many articles, tributes and remembrances to the family who lost their lives that day.

Lilly's face is always in the midst of it all. The organ donation app she developed is dedicated to the family she lost. She's turned her tragedy into a triumph. She's helped thousands of people find an organ match. Beyond that, she's been instrumental in introducing organ recipients their donor families. Stories of those meetings have punctuated daytime television for the past two years.

I feel a faint tap on my shoulder and I know. I fucking know that I can't run now.

Sophia inches to the side so she can look behind me.  I won't let her bear the brunt of this for me. I have to face Lilly, so I do.

I turn on my heel and look right at her. Her eyes fill with tears. "Nick. It is you."

"Lilly." I hold out my arms praying she'll hug me.

She moves forward quickly, her arms circling me. "I thought I'd never see you again."