Chapter Twenty-One
The cottage was down a narrow little road and surrounded by fields on one side and a small wood on the other. Perfect for shifters who wanted privacy and room to run. Odin went to check out the perimeter while Jay helped Byron unload some of the bags. He couldn’t quite understand the feeling of sadness within him but there another feeling too and just thinking about it made him feel guilty. When the woman, the stranger, had opened the door, he’d been relieved that he hadn’t known her.
The more he thought about it, the worse he felt. He was supposed to be doing this for Noah. If Ben and Adam were going to find him, they’d need answers. To get those answers, Jay needed to find the people who’d given him up. There was no way around it. This was why they’d come all the way out here. This was what he’d promised to do.
Byron was exploring the kitchen and pulling food from bags.
“You must be hungry,” he said, smiling over at Jay. Jay wasn’t. There was a heavy ball in the pit of his stomach that he couldn’t escape. When he didn’t smile back, Byron put down the food he was carrying and came over.
“What’s wrong?”
Jay shrugged. “I’m not hungry.”
“You haven’t eaten in hours, except that ice-cream.”
A tear slipped down his cheek and he turned away, trying to hide his face from the Alpha.
“Jay?”
A second tear escaped, then another.
“Oh, Jay.” Byron’s arms encircled him, turning him so they were face to face and not letting go.
“I didn’t want it to be them at the house. And it wasn’t. And I was glad.”
Byron pulled him closer, shushing him gently.
“I’m a bad person for wanting that. Because now we can’t find Noah and it’s all my fault.”
He sobbed against Byron’s shirt, the material becoming damp from his tears.
“Wishing something doesn’t make you a bad person. It was never going to be them, Jay. It wouldn’t have mattered if you’d wanted it to be them with all your heart, it was never going to be.”
Jay couldn’t stop the tears, sobbing noisily as Byron held him. All the emotions battered at him like the winds of a storm and he was so tired of trying to fend them off.
“That’s it, Jay. Just let it all out. You can’t bottle it up forever,” Byron was saying, stroking a hand across his head.
“Come on, let’s go lie down.”
He didn’t let go of Byron as the Alpha guided them from the kitchen and into a bedroom. Within seconds they were lying on a soft bed, his head pillowed on Byron’s chest, feeling it rise and fall with each slow breath. The tears still came, though slower now, with little choked breaths and sighs that he couldn’t hold back.
When he woke sometime later, the curtains had been drawn, throwing the room into a gloomy darkness. Byron lay beside him, his eyes closed. It was still daytime, he could see the sun peeking in through a crack where the curtains met. The weight of guilt and sadness that had dogged him had eased. It wasn’t gone, but it was small enough for Jay to hold in his hand and not big like before, where the weight of it pressed down on him.
Byron seemed peaceful, his breath coming in long, slow draws. One arm was curled under his head, pulling up his shirt and exposing the tanned skin of his stomach. It was too much to resist and Jay slid his hand along the smooth skin, feeling the taut muscle beneath his touch. He bent down, bringing his mouth close to Byron’s skin before pressing his lips against it, slow and soft and with no teeth. He knew firsthand, having done it to Byron once before, that the Alpha didn’t like being bitten, especially not when he slept. Kisses though. Byron liked those. Inching the Alpha’s shirt up higher, he enjoyed the newly revealed skin, letting his hand play across it before tasting it with his mouth, with his tongue. He pushed Byron’s shirt up even higher, revealing one pale pink nipple. He’d never tasted that before. He inched closer, watching Byron for any signs of awakening, before blowing gently on the skin. Byron twitched at that, but didn’t wake. So Jay leaned in, closing his lips around it, licking before sucking gently.
Byron moaned under his breath, one hand coming up to drag his fingers through Jay’s hair. Jay sucked harder and Byron’s moan became a gasp as he opened his eyes, drinking in the sight of Jay against him.
“No teeth,” he said teasingly, letting his fingers scratch gently across Jay’s scalp. Jay retaliated by sucking harder, pulling a cry from Byron’s lips, made louder when Jay’s hand found the other nipple still hidden beneath Byron’s shirt and rolled it gently between his fingers.
Byron’s groin was pressed against his stomach and Jay could feel he was growing hard. He didn’t stop what he was doing, too eager for the distraction. Byron’s hands found his hips, and he wasn’t sure what to expect as the Alpha encouraged him up away from his body. But the Alpha slipped his hands beneath the waistband of Jay’s boxers and inched them down, before pushing his own boxers down. Then he settled Jay back down against him, their groins pressed together.
Jay let go of Byron’s nipple with wet pop, and dived for the other, encapsulating it between his lips as his other hand played with the first. The effect was just as dramatic, Byron arching against him and pushing their cocks together. The friction was delicious and Jay mimicked him, rolling his hips so they pressed together only harder. The press of Byron’s hard cock against him was almost too much. He’d have cried out if his mouth hadn’t been busy. Byron’s hands were busy too, one rubbing back and forth across Jay’s ass, the other slipping between them, a teasing touch across his balls as they rutted against each other.
Byron’s hand on his ass slipped between his cheeks to rub up and down along the crease there. The sensation had him thrusting harder against Byron, seeking more. More friction, more touch, more exploration. The wandering hand found a little spot behind Jay’s balls and rubbed back and forth against it. Jay’s mouth stilled, and he shuddered, lifting his head to meet Byron’s eyes. Byron was lifting his hips up and down as his finger found its mark and a white-hot burst of pleasure flooded Jay who managed an ‘oh’ of surprise as Byron tensed against him.
His arms were around Jay a moment later, settling the Omega against his chest. Their stomachs were a mix of sticky come and sweat but Jay didn’t care, his eyes on Byron, his body coming down from the high it had reached.
“Is that… was that…” He couldn’t get the right words out. “Was that good?”
Byron chuckled, stroking a sticky hand across Jay’s flushed cheek. “You’re going to be the death of me. And what a wonderful, glorious death that will be.”
Jay frowned a little but Byron’s hand was there, soothing the lines from his forehead. “It’s a good thing, Jay. It means I’ve never felt so good as I did just then, with you.”
“It was like all the good touches, all at once,” Jay mumbled, letting his head rest against Byron’s chest again.
“Yes, exactly like that,” Byron murmured.
Odin had food laid out in the kitchen when they finally emerged, freshly showered. He took a long look at both of them, but didn’t say a word, hiding a smile behind his coffee cup. The three of them sat down at the table and ate, tucking in to meat and salad. It reminded Jay of the first night he’d spent with Byron, where the Alpha had patiently named all the food on the table and hadn’t minded when Jay had got tomato juice on everything. Jay had known then that he had met someone different, but it wasn’t until later that he realized it was more than that.
He’d warmed to Byron because he was kind. But when other shifters had come to hurt him, Jay had protected him. Because Byron was his to protect just as much as the Alpha protected him. And now he felt even closer to Byron. They’d shared something.
When Byron caught Jay staring, he smiled broadly at him. Jay smiled back. Odin grumbled something under his breath about lovebirds. Jay glanced out the window but he couldn’t see any birds. He innocently said so to Odin who raised his eyebrows. “I was talking about you two.”
“But we’re not birds, we’re wolves.”
“It’s a figure of speech, Jay,” Byron said patiently. “Lovebirds are two people who are very obviously in love because of how they act around each other.”
“Hell of a time and place to pick,” Odin said.
“It’s an emotional time, Odin. It’s a good thing if Jay can draw comfort from me, if we can take comfort in each other.”
“I didn’t mean that,” Odin said. “I just think it might be a bit more than the situation and the emotions.”
“More than…” Byron repeated, glancing over at Jay before turning back to Odin. “You think…”
“Might be. I’m not exactly an expert in this. But neither are you.”
“What is it? What’s wrong?” Jay asked, feeling that sense of unease growing in the pit of his stomach again.
Byron was quick to reassure him, slipping an arm across his shoulders. “Nothing is wrong, Jay. Odin is wondering if perhaps you might go into heat shortly.”
“Heat? Now?”
“Hopefully not right now. We certainly knew it would come, eventually. It might be that it’s soon. It might simply be that it is the emotions of retracing your past that are just accelerating things that would occur naturally.”
“Then, it’s not bad?” Jay needed to check. He wasn’t sure because people didn’t always say what they really meant.
“It’s not a bad thing,” Byron reassured, leaning close enough that they could hug. “It’s a good thing. And, if this afternoon was anything to go by, we’re going to have a lot of fun.”
Odin choked on a mouthful of coffee but Jay couldn’t keep the smile from his face. This was what he’d wanted for a long time. Byron to be his and not just in words.