VEE

My memories follow me into my dreams, confusion wrecking my head. They're vague, disturbing, the magic causing me to fade in and out of awareness. I remember his mouth on mine. His taste. Scent.

How he looked like Ewan.

I turn in bed and cover my head with a pillow, anger at the violation seeping in. I wish Ewan hadn't killed the bastard; I'd rather have ended him myself. Like many girls, I've experienced sly groping from guys conveniently close on buses, along with unwarranted comments. Once before I had a guy kiss me without consent and I rewarded him with a knee to the balls. But this...

Helpless. I don't do helpless. The guys need to show me how I can defend myself against these people who want to prey on or kill me. If my power needs working on to reach full strength, I need to protect myself in the meantime. Give me daggers, holy water, or whatever else they use, and I’ve no qualms about using them anymore.

Before we left the room, Ewan explained there was nothing I could’ve done in the situation. The incubi and succubi acted in pairs, distracting the victim so the other could use magic to induce arousal and then sleep. Only once their victim slept could they take the energy they needed by sexual assault.

Ewan told me I was lucky, and I understand what he meant but couldn’t say. Lucky I wasn't raped. I shake away the thought. I don't want to run through the memories again. Can't.

The unspoken question hovered between us last night. Why did the incubus disguise himself as Ewan? I want to ask, but I know the answer. Of the two guys I spent time with last night, he's the one I fight my attraction to. I've no doubt if Heath or Joss had been present, it could easily be one of them.

But it wasn't, and now I can't look Ewan in the face.

* * *

The sun's barely risen when my sleepless night ends with a need to take in fresh air and nature to clear my mind. I step out the back door, heading for the path towards the open fields, and find Xander outside, alone, on his phone. He hastily finishes the call when he hears my feet crunch across the ground and tucks his phone away.

"You're up early for somebody who had a heavy night," he says. "How's the hangover?"

Still wound tight from the events last night, I snap back at him. "I wasn't drunk."

"Sure." His eyes glisten with amusement. Xander’s jacketless in the cool morning, a black shirt unbuttoned across a grey T-shirt, which stretches across the contours of his chest. His eyes are bright, curious even. "Where are you headed?"

"A walk," I say.

"Not far, I hope."

"Not sure."

"Want some company?"

I fold my arms across my chest. "Really?"

"Why so shocked?"

"I'm too tired for War games if that's your intention."

He grins. "No, I'm in a better mood today."

We trudge away from the house, across the field towards the woods bordering the property. My breath mists around my face, and the crisp air carries the damp earthy scent around. We don't speak, but the discomfort I expected isn't with us. I guess the desire to be around them all also applies to the guy I don't particularly like spending time with.

I wait for some snark or a reference to our encounter in the club before Ewan arrived. Was that moment between us a challenge? Or a warning? He stares ahead, hands in pockets and cheeks reddened by the cool. He's as beautiful as the other guys, but the tension around him rarely leaves. I’m confused because I secretly love the idea of meeting his challenge and seeing where things could lead.

I also like that Xander's the guy less inclined to wrap me in cotton wool; he could solve one problem. I halt. "Can I ask you something? My power, whatever it is, can you teach me how to use it?"

Xander scrunches his face up. "You already know. You've been doing it for years—detecting lies."

"Not that, the other thing. The light."

"Ah." Xander purses his lips. "I would, but, to be completely honest with you, I don't know what your true powers are, and I can't teach you anything."

My spirits sink into my shoes. I was sure this man knew secrets the others held back, that as War he'd know how to use our individual abilities.

"But you knew I'd... explode or whatever when we were at Portia's house."

"Yeah, we know you enhance our powers, but not how. I didn't know what would happen that day, just that you would amplify my power through connecting to me. I've no idea how Heath summons the energy to kill. Or how Ewan’s and Joss’s powers work."

"But you felt stronger with me?"

"Oh yeah, you definitely turned my strength up a notch or ten." He grins. "Maybe the light was the energy; something inside you ‘charging up’. Who the hell knows?"

"I bloody wish I did." I pause. "I felt stronger at that moment though; angrier."

"Huh. Maybe it's a two way thing and you take on some of our individual powers when we connect."

"That'd be awesome." I voice my thoughts. "All four powers. I'd wreck the world! Every last evil bastard."

Xander gives me a strange look. "You sound like you want to start with someone in particular."

"I need to learn how first."

"Yeah, not sure I can help you with that part. Sorry."

The only way to hide my frustration at his words is to walk away.

"I can teach you other things," he calls as I approach the nearby trees. "If you want."

"What things?" I turn.

"Self-defence."

"I know self-defence. I took classes."

"Against the supernatural?" he asks. "I doubt it. Their weak spots are different to humans, and from race to race."

We study each other for a moment. His attitude to me last night, the semi-proposition as we stood against the wall in the club, pissed me off, but he's the only guy not treating me with kid gloves.

"Unless they use magic," I mutter.

Xander steps forward and frowns down at me. "Did something happen? I sense something's not right; I did last night when we drove home."

I suck my lips together and wait for the "tell the truth" to pass. "Show me some self-defence moves, then."

Xander wrinkles his nose. "I dunno..."

"What? Why? Scared I'll beat you?" I retort.

"Seriously? No. I'm scared I'll hurt you."

"Try me." I beckon him with both hands. "Bring it on, Pony Boy." Portia's nickname for the boys amuses me, mostly because it clearly pissed them off. "But no knives."

In an instant, Xander lunges and seizes me, one arm around my neck. I claw at his arm but his grip tightens. I'm shocked by his sudden move and on the burn spreading through from where our bodies touch.

Again. This reaction to all four men is beyond a joke.

XANDER

Holy hell.

My body courses with an overwhelming energy, fuelled by her mocking implication she could match my combat skills. I fight down how this clouds my head because this is the reason I stay disconnected from Vee, mentally and physically. She’s the centre of us all, and something not yet understood places her inside our hearts and souls too. Seizing hold of Vee has the opposite effect to what I intended; she’s gained control of me by shattering the barrier I attempted to build.

Which means I focus on the task, literally, in hand to rebuild this. I push down the awareness of how soft the skin is on her arms, how her warmth fills me with heat, and forge on.

"An assailant would hold you tighter than this. Show me what you'd do."

"I'll hurt you," she says through gritted teeth and jabs an elbow upwards into my neck. I flinch as she collides with my windpipe.

"Good." I release her, and as she faces me, I’m distracted again. Why when I look into Vee’s eyes, do I see something my soul craves, a missing piece I can’t grasp? Mesmerised, I miss her next move, as she side steps and catches one leg around mine.

I stumble but regain my footing. What the fuck? I trap her long leg, between my thighs. Should I throw her to the ground? Win? "Nice try, Verity."

She drags her leg away and crosses her arms. "Thanks. What next?"

I run my tongue along my teeth. Fine. "Vamps, you go here." I indicate my neck with a slicing motion. "If you have a knife, hold it horizontally against their throat and push. Head gone, dead vamp."

She blinks. "You must carry bloody sharp knives."

"They're silver. Slices through the bastards like butter."

Did she just pale? "Okay."

"Explaining what to do is harder with demons because there're so many varieties. With most, it's a simple kill—to the heart, exactly the way you would with a human. Some are stronger, but holy water in the face slows them down."

A familiar confusion purses Vee’s lips. "If you have superpowers, why do you need knives?"

I give an amused snort. "Superpowers?"

"Powers that can kill, then."

"Hand to hand is quicker and easier sometimes. Draws less attention too."

I frown as laughter bubbles from Vee. "Knifing people or cutting their heads off draws less attention?"

"Demons. Not people. And yes. Look at it this way, using powers takes energy. If we use that energy up on lowlife, and harder enemies follow, we aren’t at our best to fight them. Okay?" I get Vee’s need to understand her new life, but her incessant questioning of what we’ve done for years annoys me.

"And now I’m here you have more energy."

"Precisely."

"Am I supposed to take a backpack of supplies with me everywhere?" she says, mouth twitching in amusement. "Ask them to stop their nefarious deeds while I select a weapon?"

"This isn't a joke," I growl.

"Sorry. Sarcasm is my superpower." For fuck’s sake. She catches my annoyance. "Xander, sorry, humour is my way of dealing with this headfuck, okay?"

I huff. "Yes, we carry most in our car and take what we anticipate we'll need when we confront them." I hold my jacket to one side, revealing a knife tucked into my coat. "And I anticipate always."

Vee studies the knife. "What about the fae?"

"We don't kill them. Though my brother needs reminding about that."

"But what if they're trying to kill me? Y'know, like that guy did."

I push a hand through my hair. "Just disarm them somehow. Ask them a lot of questions. Confuse them. Whatever. Usually they have demons do their dirty work. You'll be fine. If you believe your life is under threat, I'm sure your powers will trigger."

"But magic? How do I resist that?"

"Vee, we're not invincible. We're susceptible to magic."

Her face clouds and she shakes her hands out by her sides, loosening the muscles. "Right, so I beat the hell out of everything before they get as far as magic."

I curl my mouth in amusement. "I guess you could try, but that might become problematic if you accidentally 'beat the hell' out of a human. I think you'd probably need a bit more practice first, though. You're clearly not capable of one on one, since I beat you that easily."

Her mouth thins as she stares back, chest rising and falling rapidly. I turn my back and prepare to walk away.

"Not up to it?" Vee’s body hits my back as she runs at me and curls an arm around my neck. I stagger forwards due to the force, fighting to steady myself. Vee pushes her knees into the back of mine and my legs give way. This time I can’t stop myself falling as I land on my hands and knees. Autumn leaves crunch beneath my palms as they hit the hard ground and fury blackens my eyes.

Who the fuck does she think she’s messing with?

I stare downwards, head bowed, for a few seconds, listening to Vee’s breathing above me as I anticipate her next move. She doesn’t react. Is Vee worried about what she just did?

Silently, I stand and brush leaves from my knees, eyes remaining down as I watch Vee’s feet to see which way she moves.

She doesn’t.

Playing nice ends now, Verity. I charge at Vee, knocking her backwards. If this were one of the guys, I’d let him painfully hit the floor, but I manage to rein in enough of my temper to catch her weight before she lands. She lashes out at me, so I allow her to sink to the ground. Hair splayed above her head, Vee looks back in shock as I sit across her hips, pinning her to the damp earth.

My breath picks up, and I deny this is because my legs are either side and Vee’s body’s beneath me. I grip Vee’s wrists in one hand and hold her arms above her head. "I'm not a demon, Vee, I'm War and the chances you'll beat me? Zero."

Challenge remains in her expression, but with wariness added as her struggle against me stops. 

I hold my face closer. "What would you do in this position?"

Her hot breath touches my cool cheek. "To you? Or a demon?"

"Me."

"That's easy," she murmurs. "If I kissed you, there's no way you could hold me here. You'd lose the ability to think straight."

She moistens her lips. We're here again. I’m so close to giving in—to her and myself. Curious to see how she’ll react, I close the last few millimetres between our mouths until my lips touch the edge of hers.

Wrong move. The soft buzz from the briefest touch electrifies and I jerk back, before the attempt to show my superiority backfires totally. I can’t mock the other three guys when I’m as spellbound as them.

I’m right; this girl has more power over me than I’m prepared to give her.

Vee might be the one immobile beneath me, but we both know who has the power in this situation. 

The problem is nobody controls me. Ever.

I’ll fulfill my role around Vee, care for her as one of us, make sure she’s safe, but I refuse to yield to this power attempting to take charge of me.

I climb off Vee, and her eyes reflect my surprise. Because I moved or because our mouths touched? I step a few feet away and fold my hands beneath my arms. "I suggest you stand. I'm bored of this now."

She props herself up, hands behind on the ground, and blinks up at me. "Of course you are."

I rub my nose with the back of a hand. "Did I hurt you?"

"No." She knocks dirt from her hands and stands. "I'm fine. I told you I can look after myself." Then she winces and turns to look at her back.

"What’s wrong?" I ask and step forward.

"I think I grazed my back." She holds her shirt up at the back as I bend down to examine the area. A graze the size of my palm mars her pale skin along her lower back.

"You're bleeding."

She touches the spot and screws up her face. "Not much."

I drag a hand down my cheek. "Shit, sorry, Vee. How did that happen?"

"My clothes must’ve bunched up behind when I landed on my back. The grounds covered in stones. It’s only a graze, don’t worry."

"Yeah, but still..." I step closer and pick a stray leaf from her hair. "Sorry."

"Are you apologising to me, Xander?"

"I meant to teach you how not to get hurt, not hurt you. My job's to keep you safe."

"Really, it’s no big deal."

"Come inside, I’ll fix you up." I incline my head to the door. "We have a first aid kit, even Horsemen hurt themselves sometimes."

Is the shocked look on her face because I’m offering to tend to her grazes or because she’s still as affected by what just happened as my pounding heart is?

How much longer can I fool myself that I’m not as overwhelmed by Vee and unable to escape the effect in the way the other guys are?