The sound of “Thunder” by Imagine Dragons blaring from my phone is what rouses me from sleep. I blindly fling my arm out, hitting the button on the side to shut it up and send the call to voice mail. Whoever is calling me this early in the morning can go straight to hell.

When Dan Reynolds’s voice immediately starts up again, I groan, rolling over and looking at the screen. The sight of Ella’s name causes me to jackknife out of bed.

There’s only one reason Ella would be calling me before eight a.m.

Something is wrong.

“Ells,” I say, my voice coming out in a panicked whisper. “What is it?”

I look back at Ian over my shoulder as I slide out of the bed, careful not to disturb him.

After I crashed on the couch yesterday, he finally woke me up around ten and carried me upstairs to the bedroom where I promptly passed the hell out again.

Ian seems to be resting peacefully, which is more than I can say for my sister. Her voice is a rush of words and emotions, worry and tears making it almost impossible to make out what she’s saying.

I close the door behind me, padding down the hallway and the stairs. Once I’m sure I’m out of Ian’s earshot, I speak, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, Ella. Calm down. Take a deep breath. I can’t understand a word coming out of your mouth. Calm down, count to ten, and tell me what’s wrong.”

I hear her suck in a rush of air and mentally count to ten right along with her.

When she finally speaks, her tears are still evident, though her tone is much less frantic, “Oh, Lexi. I’m so, so sorry. We’re going to figure this out. We’re not going to let this set you back. You hear me?”

I shake my head, still struggling to blink away the sleep in my eyes. I rub my thumb and forefinger over my brow and into the corners of my eyes. “Ells, it’s way too damn early for me to make sense of what you’re saying. Care to explain? Are the girls okay? Drew?”

Ella lets out a deep breath. “I take it, you haven’t seen the news.”

I collapse on the couch, huffing out my annoyance. Now that I know she and her family are fine, I’m a little irritated she woke me up. This couldn’t have waited until after ten?

“You know I haven’t. I’ve been sleeping, which is what normal, sane people do at seven thirty on a Sunday.”

“It’s all over the news, Lex. All over the internet. Everybody is talking about it.”

I roll my eyes, letting my head fall back against the back of the couch. “What is it, Ella? Stop beating around the damn bush and tell me already.”

“You. They’re talking about you.”

My blood runs cold.

“Wh-what do you mean?” I ask stupidly. I know what she means.

“Someone found out. Someone found out Ian Taggart was dating you. And it didn’t take long for them to go digging into your past.”

“I-I-I…” I stammer, trailing off, unsure of what to say.

“What they’re saying is terrible, Lexi. And one hundred percent not true. I don’t even know where they’re getting some of their statements from.”

I reach for Ian’s laptop, grateful he told me the password a few days ago when I needed to use it to order some curtains for my house. I type it in, pulling up the first news site I can think of.

And there it is.

The main headline alongside the mug shot that was snapped after I was released from the hospital and taken down to the station. My eyes are puffy, my mascara smeared, a dark, swollen gash stitched across my left cheek.

As soon as I click the link, I’m assaulted by images of me out at clubs. In the bar. Dancing with strangers. Images that could have only come from my friends—or at least, those people I thought were my friends.

There’s also an image of Ian and me outside his lake house. I remember the moment it must’ve been taken.

We were walking back from my place, and I nearly slipped on some ice. Ian swept me up into his arms, telling me I couldn’t be trusted not to fall and bust my ass in my cute, furry boots. I protested, of course, going limp in his arms in an effort to make myself harder to hold on to. I didn’t need to be carried like a damn toddler. No matter how good his arms felt wrapped around me.

But seeing the picture now, my arms hanging loosely and my head bobbing back on my neck, I look like I passed out. Whoever took the picture snapped it right when my eyes were closed, my mouth open in what’s surely me trying to berate Ian for thinking he could swoop in and save me whenever he felt like it. But, in still life, it looks much worse, head rolled back on my shoulders, as I’m being carried up the stairs. I look exactly like the headline suggests. Like a drunk.

I skim through the article, skipping over the parts about Ian’s rape charge and landing on the bits about my past.

Taggart’s recently been seen with Alexis Barnes, pictured right and below, in the small town of Maple Lake, Colorado. That would explain why he’s been flying under the radar the last few weeks. Barnes recently moved to the town after a stint in rehab and six months probation, following a car accident that nearly killed a woman and her then six-year-old daughter. Barnes was charged with a DUI and sentenced to rehab and community service, and the child lost her left leg.

“Lexi has always been a bit of a partier,” an anonymous source told us. “We’ve known each other for years, and she’s always been the one who takes things a step too far. She likes to drink. There were times when she was at the bar every night. Nothing anybody said to her did anything. She just didn’t care.”

“Lexi knew she was drunk that night,” said another source. “She knew she shouldn’t drive home. When we tried to take her keys, she laughed in our faces and told us to back off. She acted like we were daring her to drive home drunk.”

“That isn’t true!” I shout to nobody, rage flooding through me as I read these so-called statements from people who supposedly know me.

It’s not until Ella speaks that I even remember I’m on the phone with her. “None of it is true, sweetie. Stop reading it. It’ll only hurt you more. Whoever said those awful things deserves every bit of Karma that comes their way. And I’m going to personally find out who they are and ensure said Karma finds their sorry asses.”

My eyes continue to scan the words before me despite Ella’s urges to do otherwise. Certain phrases jump out at me, and each one is like a stab straight through my heart.

Tears flood my eyes, blurring the words on the screen until I’m unable to make them out. I slide the laptop off my lap and curl into myself, rounding my back so that my forehead is resting on my knees. As soon as my face is hidden, I crumple.

A loud sob breaks free from my chest, taking all the air in my lungs with it. I can’t breathe. I can’t think. I can’t do anything but try to stave off the pain coursing through my body.

It hurts. It hurts so goddamn bad.

I’m vacantly aware of Ella’s soothing voice in the background, but I can’t make out any of what she’s saying. I’m grateful for her though. Her soft tone and loving words are the only things preventing me from shattering completely.

When a large hand closes over my shoulder, I jump, choking on my tears and sputtering out a horrendous cough. I swing around, finding Ian standing behind the couch, worry etched into his every feature.

“Lexi?” His voice is tentative, scared. “What’s wrong?”

I sniff loudly and turn around, my eyes falling to the carpet in front of me. I don’t want to look at him. I don’t want to see him right now, not after I’ve ruined everything between us. But I also know I owe him an explanation. He deserves to know that I’ve destroyed him. And he deserves to hear it from me, no matter how much it will hurt to say the words.

“Ella, I’m going to have to call you back,” I say through my tears, my voice wobbly and cracking. “Ian just woke up.”

“Fuck,” she mutters under her breath. “Okay. But promise me you’ll call me back as soon as you’re done talking to him. I mean it, Lexi. If I don’t hear from you in the next hour, I’m coming over there.”

I can’t even muster the strength to squeeze out a soft laugh at her threat, like I usually do.

“Bye, Ella.”

I pull the phone from my ear, pressing the End button and setting it on the coffee table. Ian steps around the sofa, taking a seat next to me and grabbing my arms, turning me to face him.

“What is it, Lex? Is Ella okay? The twins?”

I nod, the tears rushing back to my eyes as I look at him. Taking in the handsome lines of his face, the golden honey brown of his eyes, the scruff along his jaw. My eyes pause on his lips—those soft, amazing lips that have become so acquainted with every part of me. I’m going to miss every single part of him. But I think I’ll miss those lips the most.

I open my mouth, and I begin to speak.