CHAPTER ELEVEN
WILLOW PUSHED OPEN the front door to Bridgette’s cottage-style home later that afternoon and inhaled the scent of home-cooked meals, mommy hugs, and little-boy smiles. The hardwood floors were spotless, the carpets freshly vacuumed. Balloons were tied to each banister, and a colorful birthday banner hung across the foyer. Bridgette was everything Willow wasn’t, from her lithe figure and always perfectly brushed blond hair of various shades to her careful and methodical tendencies. She would make sure Louie’s birthday party—as she did his life—was perfectly orchestrated to ensure his happiness and his safety.
“Hello?” Willow called out. “Bridge? Where’s the birthday boy?”
“Upstairs, Auntie Willow!” Louie hollered. “We’re getting ready for my party!”
She carried Louie’s Spider-Man cake over to the stairs. Her body was still humming with memories of all the sexy things she and Zane had done earlier while the cake was baking. “Tell Mommy I’ll put the cake in the kitchen.”
Louie bolted toward his bedroom, and Bridgette’s voice sailed down the stairs. “Mommy’s right here.”
Her sister appeared at the top of the stairs, looking cute in a pair of white capris and a peach tank top. Her strained smile cut straight through Willow.
“Where’s your new fiancé?”
“He should be here soon. He had to pick something up. Do you have time to talk?” She inhaled a lungful of guilt. “I’m really sorry I didn’t call last night, but it was a hard night.”
Louie collided with Bridgette’s legs in full Spider-Man garb. “My Spider-Man cake!”
Bridgette took his hand, slowing his little legs down as he descended the stairs. A pang of sadness nipped at Willow. She remembered what Bridgette had been like before she’d lost the love of her life. She could have been the poster child for rebellious, wild risk takers. At nineteen she’d gone against their parents’ wishes and quit college to run away and get married to a drummer. Six months later she was pregnant, and almost a year after that one tragic car accident forever changed her and Louie’s lives. The old Bridgette would have let Louie sprint down the stairs or slide down the banister. Willow adored Bridgette, but she missed the part of her that she had buried alongside her husband.
Willow crouched for Louie to see the cake. She could only see his eyes through the Spider-Man mask, but they were as wide as hard-boiled eggs.
“Wow! Can I have a piece?”
“When Mommy says it’s time.”
“What do you say?” Bridgette reminded him with a gentle hand on his shoulder.
“Thank you, Auntie Willow!”
Willow pointed to her cheek. “How about some sugar, sweetie pop?”
He gave her a loud, smacking kiss and took off running toward the playroom. Louie was the epitome of a rainbow-layered birthday cake, full of sweet happiness inside and out.
“Now that’s more like it.” Willow rose to her feet. “Kitchen?”
Bridgette followed her in.
Willow glanced out the glass doors to the yard, which was decked out with all things Spider-Man, from the tablecloth to the piñata hanging from the big oak tree. Helium balloons were tied to the backs of all the chairs around a long table.
“Want a drink?” Bridgette asked.
“Only if it’s a stiff one.” She set the cake on the counter.
Bridgette arched a finely manicured brow. “Trouble in paradise?”
“It’s not like that.” Willow leaned on the counter, eyeing the cake. Zane had helped her frost it, and she couldn’t remember the last time she’d laughed so much. Can you imagine if we really had the ability to create webs like Spider-Man? I could tangle you up and never let you go. His tease had led to more sexy talk about being tied up, which had led to messy, frosting-covered kisses—and that was after they’d already made love on every possible surface.
“From the look on your face, I’d guess you meant something else by a hard night.”
Willow laughed and felt her cheeks heat up.
“Ah, now we’re getting somewhere. But Zane Walker?” Bridgette whispered his name. “I’m still getting over the shock of him being your first.”
“I told you three years ago.” She’d spilled her secret after too much wine, when Zane had texted twice to razz her about the Jets losing, since he was a Giants fan, followed by, Come see me. I’ll show you how a real baller plays.
“It was very traumatic for me,” Bridgette teased. “I mean, he used to spend the night at our house all the time. Don’t you remember lying in the hallway spying on him and Ben when we were like seven and eight? After you told me, I started to imagine all sorts of crazy things about you two and wondering if I missed hundreds of secret make-out sessions.”
“I assure you, you did not.” Much to her chagrin, of course. She’d fantasized about exactly that time and time again when she was a teenager.
“Not even when you were tutoring him in math?”
“Not even then.”
Bridgette wrinkled her brow, eyeing Willow’s ring. “So you go away to cater an event and come back engaged.” She pulled Willow’s hand closer, inspecting the ring. “That’s gorgeous.”
“It’s gaudy and awful,” she corrected her.
“Well, it’s not you, but I think it’s stunning. How could I not have noticed you’ve been seeing him? Why would you keep that from me?”
“Can you keep a secret?” Willow worried over breaking her promise to Zane, but while it was hard to lie to her family, it was impossible to lie to Bridgette.
“What do you think? No one else knows he popped your cherry,” she teased.
“The engagement isn’t real, but he wants it to be.”
“Holy shit,” Bridgette whispered. “You’re lying to Mom and Dad? Why?” She opened a cabinet and dug around, withdrawing a bottle of wine.
Willow reached for wineglasses.
“Mugs,” Bridgette said. “Covert operation with the little one around.”
Two mugs of wine later, Willow had told her the whole sordid story. “And now I’m in this state of limbo. And you can’t tell anyone this is fake.”
“This is a lot to process.” Bridgette twirled a lock of hair around her finger, a nervous habit she’d had for as long as Willow could remember. “You never knew you were his first?”
Willow shook her head. “I told you how he was that night. He was so in control. Mr. Calm, Cool, and Collected. I never would have guessed that he’d never done it before. And when we were together last night? One epic orgasm after another, like my body has been saving it all up for him. No one—absolutely no one—has ever made me feel like I do when we’re together. And it’s more than just the sex, you know? I can be myself with Zane. Good, bad, whatever. And the way he looks at me . . .” She shivered and held her arm up for Bridgette to see. “Goose bumps, Bridge. Goose bumps just from thinking about him.”
“That’s how it was for me and Jerry. And just for the record, I don’t want to hear about epic orgasms. I’m happy for you, but my girl hasn’t been touched since Jerry died, and she’s a little jealous.”
They both laughed. “I’m sorry. But . . . oh my God. I can’t lie. It’s magical. We’re combustible. Just like it was all those years ago, only different. Better. Because now we’re adults, and . . .” She paused, still unable to believe what she was about to say was the truth and not a silly fantasy. “This feels real, and he wants it to be. But I’m scared shitless of getting hurt again.”
“You were young, and you made up all those stupid rules.”
“I told you about the rules?” She must have had way too much wine that night, because she didn’t recall sharing those details with her sister.
“Let’s see. No feelings, no talking about it after the fact, no looking at each other differently, no blackmailing, and he was to let you walk home alone. For the record,” Bridgette said, “I’m still impressed that you did that and no one found out. But I can’t help wondering. Do you ever wish you hadn’t set up those rules?”
Willow shook her head. “I can’t think about it. I drove myself crazy thinking about it for way too many months afterward.”
“And now it’s come full circle,” Bridgette said. “You two have kept in touch like you’re best friends or lovers. And you have sexual history, which begs the question . . . if you’re not still in love with each other, why would you have kept each other in the loop of your lives for all this time?”
Willow looked up at the ceiling and groaned. “That’s why I’m so confused.” She leaned forward, and her sister met her halfway, like they used to do as little girls sharing secrets. “I don’t think I ever stopped loving him,” she whispered. “But the whole reason we’re doing this charade is because of who he is. How can I be in love with a guy who sleeps around?”
A haunted look came over Bridgette’s face, and Willow wanted to evaporate into thin air. Jerry had been madly in love with Bridgette, but he’d been a snake in the grass before they’d started dating.
The front door swung open, and their parents walked in carrying two big presents. Louie bolted out of the playroom as if he had a grandparent-homing device. “Grandma! Grandpa! Auntie Willow made me a Spider-Man cake!”
Their father lifted him into his arms. “Spider-Man doesn’t seem to have a mouth. He can’t eat cake.”
Louie tugged off his mask. “I have a mouth, Grandpa! It’s just a mask.”
Bridgette covered Willow’s hand with hers and spoke quietly. “All I can tell you is that I knew Jerry was right for me from the very first time we met. It didn’t matter that he was in a band and everyone knew what kind of guy he was. Nothing would have kept me from marrying him, because I knew we were right, regardless of what happened before we met. Musicians and actors aren’t that far apart where their endgames are concerned. Jerry used to say, ‘A player will play while he’s searching for his soul mate, and then they’re all in.’ Remember how I compared myself to all of his female fans at first? It was hard. Like, really excruciatingly hard when he was on the road, but one look in his eyes and I was toast.”
“What is it about their eyes? I’m the same way with Zane. He does this thing . . .” She lowered her chin and looked at Bridgette through her lashes.
Bridgette laughed. “I hope he does it better than that. You look a little insane.”
“You always make me feel better. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth right away, but everything happened so fast.” She moved closer so there was no chance of anyone else hearing and said, “You cannot tell anyone that the engagement is fake.”
“I never would.” Bridgette hugged her. “I think there’s a lot more to this. He could have just asked an actress to play the part, but he went to all that trouble to get you to do it. That says something.”
“Yeah, that I’m an easy mark.” Even as she said it, she knew it wasn’t true. She’d compared every man to Zane for so long, and now she had the only man she’d ever wanted. But she was terrified of handing over her heart, afraid to believe what would make her the happiest woman in the world could really be coming true.
“Since when are you a pessimist? You’re the chosen one. That’s how I see it.”
Their mother breezed into the kitchen and kissed the top of each of their heads. “Are you girls going to chat all day? The rest of the kids are going to be here in ten minutes.”
“Come on.” Bridgette pushed to her feet.
“Where’s that man of yours?” their father asked on his way out to the yard.
“He’ll be here soon.” Willow glanced at her phone. It had been hours since Zane had left to pick up the rental car. She wondered where he’d gotten held up.
More than an hour later, ten little boys and girls were taking turns swinging a bat at the Spider-Man piñata, and Willow was chowing down on her second piece of cake.
“It’s pretty bad when your fiancé stands you up.” Piper stood beside Willow, stealing pieces of Willow’s cake off her plate. “But it’s even worse when he stands you up at your nephew’s birthday party.”
“Thanks for pointing that out,” Willow snarled. It wasn’t like she hadn’t already run through the gamut of possible reasons why Zane was late. She chose to ignore the worst of them—a pretty fan catching his attention—and went with what was clearly less likely but more palatable: he’d gotten locked in a gas station bathroom and had no way out.
“Well, he is Zane,” Piper said.
“Yes. My fiancé,” Willow reminded her, feeling oddly proprietary of him. “So please tread carefully, okay, sis? This is an emotional time for all of us.”
“Mm-hm. I’m sure he just got caught up with fans or something.”
Let’s hope not. “I know you don’t trust him.”
Piper tucked her stick-straight shoulder-length blond hair behind her ear and crossed her lithe arms. “It’s not that I don’t trust him, per se. It’s just always bothered me that he used to lead you on. I worried you’d hook up with him and get your heart broken. I’m so glad you weren’t that stupid.”
Willow watched Louie swing at the piñata, hoping Piper couldn’t read the truth in her eyes. “What are you talking about? He never led me on.”
“Oh, come on. Don’t try to pretend you weren’t completely in love with him when you were a kid. He was always right there when you were baking, and asking you for help with math? He was two grades ahead of you. That was sort of ridiculous, don’t you think?”
She decided to ignore the first accusation, because how many lies could one woman be expected to maintain in one day? “He was a kid who loved cookies. And I kicked ass in math.” Could he have been flirting with her back then and not really lame in precalc? She didn’t have a clear enough head to figure that out at the moment, and the truth was, she had been a tall, gangly girl with big boobs and an uncanny ability to work with numbers, while Zane could have had his pick of the most popular, beautiful girls. “But let’s say that was true and he really did flirt with me. Shouldn’t you be happy for us now?”
“Maybe,” Piper said cheerily. Then her expression turned serious. “If I hadn’t seen pictures of him with no less than three women in the last two months.”
“That was all part of our plan to cover things up.” Willow hoped she sounded casual, but she was pretty sure she sounded like she was lying.
“Then you’re a better woman than me, because I’d never put up with that shit.” She snagged another bite of Willow’s cake.
“I was doing the same thing!” Willow whispered harshly. “You know I went out with Billy Crusher six or eight weeks ago and Xavier Frank last month. We explained this yesterday.”
“That’s true. I had forgotten about that. I just don’t want you to get hurt, because if he hurts you, then I’d have to kill him. And then I’d go to jail, and look at me. I’m tough as nails out here, but in the pen? The whole scene isn’t pretty.”
Willow laughed and set her plate on the table. “You’re a big pain in the ass for such a tiny person, but thank you for watching out for me.”
“You’re my little sister. I’ll always have your back. Are you sure everything’s okay? He’s really late, and Sweetwater isn’t big enough for him to get lost.”
“Spider-Man!” Louie sprinted toward the side yard with nine screaming friends on his heels.
Talia sidled up to Willow and Piper as they headed for the side yard. Butterflies took flight in Willow’s stomach as a tall, broad Spider-Man came into focus and lifted Louie into his arms. She would know that athletic build anywhere.
Ben’s laughter sailed across the yard from where he and their father were heading toward the mayhem.
“Mom! It’s Spider-Man!” Louie yelled to Bridgette, who was looking at Willow with an approving smile.
“Oh my God,” Piper said with awe. “I’ve never seen Louie so happy.”
“The only one missing from this party is your man, Willow,” Talia pointed out.
“Not anymore,” Willow said more to herself than to her sisters.
Spider-Man looked over the kids’ heads, locking eyes with Willow. He lifted his shoulders in that simple, honest shrug that was so very Zane it made her warm all over.
“I concede,” Piper said. “He might have just won me over.”
“Me too,” Willow whispered. His voice sailed through her mind. Then stop pushing me away and let me show you the man I can be. The man I will be for you.
She was done pushing. So very done.
“WHAT YOU DID for Louie was amazing,” Bridgette said to Zane as she hugged him goodbye after the party. “He’ll remember this day forever.”
“He’s a great little guy.” Zane reached for Willow’s hand, glad to see things between her and Bridgette seemed to be okay. “If you have time while I’m in town, why don’t we all get together? We can do something kid friendly.”
The smile Willow flashed made him want to suggest it again and again.
“Or we can have Mom and Dad watch Louie and we can do something adultish,” Bridgette suggested.
“I’ll call you, Bridge.” Willow hugged her, and Zane heard indiscernible whispers pass between them.
They both came away smiling, which he took as a good sign, and Willow reached for his hand again.
“Thank you for being so good to Louie,” she said as they walked down the driveway toward their cars. “I’ve never seen him so happy.”
“I’m sorry about being so late. I thought I could get a costume at Walmart in the next town over, but they only had kids’ sizes. I had to call a buddy from the city, and he met me halfway.”
“You had someone drive halfway from New York City? You must have really good friends.”
“Why does that surprise you?” He nudged her shoulder with his. “You know I’m a good guy.”
“Yeah. I do.”
“So you’ll stop all the nonsense and give me a chance?”
“Haven’t I already shown you that?” When they reached her car, she hooked her finger into the waist of his jeans and pulled him closer. “On the counter in my bakery kitchen? On the prep table? In my office?”
His body had been humming all afternoon from their sexy tryst. “Maybe you should refresh my memory.” He backed her up, trapping her against the car.
“Do I have a choice?” she teased.
“Always.”
She shook her head with a sweet smile on her lips. “Not when it comes to you I don’t. I never have.”
His mouth came down gently over hers in a kiss so warm and wonderful he never wanted it to end.
“Let’s go by Ben’s and get your stuff,” she said between kisses.
“It’s in my car.”
“Geez. You could at least pretend like it was my choice.”
He laughed as she climbed into her car. “Babe, I know you better than you know yourself. How many times do I have to say that before you realize it’s true?”
Her smile faded, and she ran her finger along the edge of the steering wheel, avoiding his eyes. “I told Bridgette.”
“I know you did.”
Her eyes flicked to his. “How . . . ?”
He cocked a brow.
“Right.” She smiled again. “You know me.”
“I told Ben.”
“You said you might.” She reached up and grabbed his shirt, tugging him down to eye level. “I’m scared, Z. You need to know that. Like, scared-to-death scared.”
“I know that, too, sweetheart, and I’m going to do everything I can to make sure you know you can trust me.” He gave her a chaste kiss. “We’re playing by my rules, remember? Let go of all the bullshit, and one day you’ll wake up and realize I’ve been the frosting on your cupcake all along.”
She laughed. “You’re such a weirdo.”
“What does that say about you? You’re engaged to a weirdo.” He glanced up at Bridgette’s house. “I used to think the houses here were nondescript, but they’re really cute as hell.”
“You were in such a rush to get out of Sweetwater and on to bigger, better things, you snubbed your nose at a lot of things.”
“I never snubbed my nose at you.” He leaned in for another kiss.
She sighed. “Hashtag truth.”
“Now who’s the weirdo?”
“Definitely you. Think we can watch one of those movies on your playlist tonight?”
He closed her car door and leaned in the window, taking another kiss. “We can try.” He winked and walked toward his rental car.
“What does that mean?” she called after him.
He glanced over his shoulder. The passion between them transcended words. We’re so right together. What the hell took me so long to figure it out?