Chapter

Nate lay in bed that night thinking of just how it went. His mind jumped back and forth between horrible and glorious. At first—Well, at first, she had been flirting, hadn’t she? And she agreed to eat with him. He didn’t see how that could be anything but a good sign. But of course, she had eaten and left quickly. And he told her about Sarah. That made it sound like he wasn’t totally interested in her. Why couldn’t he have watched his words better?

Then he reminded himself for the millionth time that he was not supposed to be getting anywhere with her. That she was a victim in an open case. He hoped that would right itself soon, but for now he had told Leslie that he wouldn’t be trying anything. It would just be easier if he didn’t see her everywhere.

Eventually, he fell into a fitful sleep. He had been hoping for a nice long rest before the double shift he pulled on Fridays, but that didn’t seem to be what was bound to happen. Instead, he dreamed of them.

It was Sarah he saw first. She was sitting on a wall, swinging her legs back and forth. The wall was about five feet high, and he thought it was there to separate a property line. Sarah sat there, whistling like she often did when bored or distracted. She had gorgeous black hair pulled back tight and wore white that shone against her dark skin.

He didn’t see anyone push her, but he saw Sarah fall. She landed hard, and he didn’t realize he was standing on concrete until he heard her bones hit the ground. The crunch was solid and tumbling. He knew if he looked he’d see blood, so he looked away. That’s when he saw Dove. She ran up to where Sarah was lying on the ground. He looked away again, and woke up.

His alarm was blaring. He hit the snooze while trying to turn it off, and considered just going back to sleep until it went off again, but he knew that wouldn’t leave him enough time to get ready. He got up and got dressed. If he skipped breakfast he could sleep more, but that would leave him hungry well before lunch.

He drove to the precinct in a daze. The dream didn’t mean anything to him, not really, and besides, he didn’t believe in dream interpretation anyway. He had been thinking about them a lot, so he dreamed about them. That was clear enough.

“Someone looks dead tired,” Jessica said when he walked inside. “And you haven’t even started the double shift yet.”

“I just need to wake up a bit,” he answered, and saw her walk to the coffee pot. He only drank coffee when he needed it, and Jessica always seemed able to tell when he needed it. She came back with the coffee—black, how he liked it—and put it in his hand.

“Ready for rounds?” she asked. “We’re going to drop by your girlfriend’s first, just to make sure she’s safe.”

Nate saw Leslie’s head snap over, and he frowned. “Stop calling her that. We’re on a case she’s a part of. You know I’d never date someone who was a part of a case.”

“Whatever you say,” she answered. They went and got in the car. “What’s got your knickers in a twist?” she asked as they walked out to the car.

“Leslie had a talk with me about not being involved with anyone we’re on a case with.”

“Oh man, I wouldn’t have said anything if I knew the fuzz were on your back,” she said with a grin. He thought, despite the pseudo-sarcasm, she was being serious. He appreciated that about her. She truly didn’t want him getting into any trouble.

“Can I ask you a question?” he asked.

“I hope it’s about romance,” she said. “As you know, I’m the queen of romance.”

“It is.”

“Then fire away.”

“How do you know if you really like someone or you’re just on a rebound?” he asked. He hadn’t gotten up this morning expecting to ask that question, but it seemed important now that he had said it aloud. He supposed ever since he had told Dove he was trying someone new to get over Sarah, he wondered if that’s all she was. It didn’t seem like that was the case—it seemed like he really liked her—but he didn’t know how to be sure. Was the feeling of butterflies enough to be certain? Didn’t people generally feel butterflies about a lot of people? He just didn’t know if those butterflies would stay.

“Dove’s not a rebound,” she said.

“How do you know?”

“Because I see the face you make whenever I bring her up. That’s not the face someone makes about a rebound.”

“It’s all in the face?” he asked.

“And in your defensiveness, and protectiveness, and general air.”

“Right. You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Thanks,” he said. That made him feel better. Perhaps even comfortable enough to see Dove. He pulled in to the motel, and got out. “I’m assuming we’re going inside?”

“Just in case. She’s room number 22.”

Nate walked up to the room and knocked at the door. Dove opened it, wearing the same clothes she had the day before.

“Hey. We’re just here to check up with you, make sure everything’s okay.”

“Everything’s fine,” she answered.

Nate hated that word. Fine. Everything was fine. Everyone was fine. It meant nothing. It was a placeholder word for when people didn’t want to explain their emotions.

“Well, we may check up on you again. Just want to make sure nothing happened. If anything does happen, don’t hesitate to call. You have the entire department on board now.”

“Thank you,” she said. Nate felt some distance. This didn’t seem like the woman he had ate dinner with the night before. He had a feeling it had something to do with saying he was still caught on Sarah.

“Well, see you later, then …” He hung around the door, but Jessica turned and walked away, and after a moment he followed her.

“What did you do?” she said. “I thought she liked you, now that you believed her.”

“I may have insinuated that she was a rebound,” he answered.

She laughed. “What a mistake that clearly was. No girl wants to hear she’s a rebound, Nate.”

“I didn’t mean to say it; it just kind of happened. What do I do?”

“Nothing till the case is over, remember?”

“I think she needs to go get some clothes and stuff. Maybe I should offer to take her. She’d be safer with a cop there.”

“No, you’re not offering to do anything with her. That’s not how this works. For now, you’re keeping your distance, doing everything exactly by the books. Don’t forget Leslie. When the case is over, then you go to her bringing flowers. Flowers cover a multitude of sins. Understood?”

“Even calling her a rebound?”

“Did you use the actual word?”

“No! I’m not a total idiot.”

“Then I think there’s just a chance this might work.”