Chapter 15

Calypso

Moments later, I was headed to a place no one had expected me to go, lest of all myself.

I’d not visited with my sisters in, oh, hm...years, really. Like a couple hundred thousand, give or take. We weren’t really that tight. Like we were close, I guess, but we weren’t tiiiiiight, there were no Christmas cards exchanged or birthday presents doled out. But we really couldn’t live without each other either. It was a family thing. What can I say?

Wrinkling my nose, I headed to Fiera’s hearth first, mainly because as my polar opposite, she was unpleasant for me to be around for too long.

Screwing my eyes shut, I willed myself to the realm of Fire. I knew the moment I’d arrived, because I began to sizzle. I had a limitless amount of water at my disposal to keep me from harm as I walked down the brimstone pathway flickering with hottest flame. Shielding myself tight, I admired my sister’s decorative skills.

For as far as the eye could see, this land and everything that lived in it burned, a perpetual flame that would never be extinguished. The mountains burned. Fire oaks with their beautiful fiery leaves snapped and crackled. Fireflies with burst of flame emitting from their tiny rears flitted happily here and there.

Tiny fire imps, nasty little devils with teeth as sharp as Bruce’s, bounded between trees, staring at me with wide-eyed wonder. They were dressed as wee woodcutters, with breeches that came to their knobby knees and shirts stained a permanent black. Their hair was not actually hair at all but blue flame that writhed and danced like charmed cobras around their withered frames.

I waved merrily to a boy, no older than eight, nine thousand years at the most, who came closest to me.

“Where is Fiera?” I called out.

He licked his lips. “Ye look tasty, ye do.”

Grinning, I knelt and held out my hand. “Would you like a wee nibble, little devil?”

As he hopped toward me, I could feel the eyes of those hiding still gazing on me with wonder, fear, and even a dollop of hungry jealousy.

The imp moved strangely, dragging his knuckles across the ground with each hop, reminding me oddly of a guttering candle flame. When he neared, I saw that his face had the youthful appearance of a cherubim, but his brows were nothing but soot and ash. His lips were wormy little lines and his eyes an unusual color of purple.

How adorable he was.

Cooing to him, I gave him one of my fingers. “You may nibble, but do not bite, or I shall cut your head off your neck.”

“Yessum.” He bobbed his head enthusiastically and then, opening his razor-sharp mouth, suckled gently on the tip of my pinky.

The touch of his tongue was fire through my bones, and I had to admit to liking the burn. Water was a delicacy in these parts and much savored. He drank his fill of me, so that his belly was nicely distended by the time he’d finished.

Then, chortling happily, he grasped my hand and beamed. I’d made a friend.

“I’ll take ye to me queen,” he chirped. I was about to ask him to unhand me, because the steam curling between our palms was making me feel wilty, but he was so ridiculously adorable that I that decided just this once I’d deal.

Pea Brain, as I’d soon learned he was called, blathered on and on relentlessly about how pretty I was and how fine I’d tasted, and would I come back tomorrow and feed him again?

To which I smiled but shook my head no. “If I feed you again, I would have to feed the rest of you miscreants, and I’d be here an eternity, Pea Brain. I am here but for a moment, and then I should have to leave.”

I soon spied a thatched hut off in the distance. The entire thing was burning, of course.

There was a beautiful little garden out in front that looked like vegetables and fruits. I recognized a few of them: fire snap peas and charred tomatoes on the vine.

My stomach grumbled; I’d forgotten to eat this morning. I wondered if I could beg some food of my sister.

And then I spied said sister. She was as lovely as ever. Her figure was trim and toned, and she wore a buttery gown that fell past her ankles and that sparked with the light of a thousand flames.

Like the imp’s, her hair was also made of fire, but this fire was green, a mystical flame that curled down her back becomingly. Her skin gleamed like burnished opal.

“Thalassa?” Fiera asked with a soft frown marring her polished skin. “To what do I owe this honor?”

Pea Brain dropped my hand then and then, dropping prostrate before his queen, chanted, “I am not worthy. I am not worthy, my flaming enchantress of beauty.”

Fiera cast him a benevolent smile. “You may go now, Pea.”

Scampering to his feet, he bounded off like a tiny kangaroo.

When I had her full attention again, I said, “I wish you to rain down fire on Olympus, love.”

“Oh, do you?” She smiled. “And what have those fools done this time?”

The last time Fiera had done aught against them had been during the great Titan war. For reasons beyond me, she’d sympathized with the stupid brutes. They’d lost, of course, but to the best of my knowledge, she’d not bothered with the Olympians since.

“They wish to harm my sex slave.”

It took her a moment to grasp what I’d said, and when she did, her opalescent eyes widened. “Thalassa, are you virgin no more?”

Giggling, I cried, “Nope!”

She clutched at her chest. “And how was it? I thought you did not desire a man’s touch.”

Rolling my eyes as though in ecstasy, I sighed. “Ye gods, it is glorious. His cock is a magnificent thing, and I wish to ride it for an eternity, but now the bastards threaten to torture him for a millennium at least, and I am not ready to release him. He is mine.”

Perplexed wonder crossed her face. I knew my confession amazed and confused her. If I’d been her, I was sure I’d feel much the same way. There’d never been a man worthy of us.

Until now. Hades was quite worthy of me.

“I will do as you say, Thalassa. I will aid you in this, but first I desire a boon from you.”

I’d come prepared, knowing I’d be asked. Nothing was ever granted without a cost.

“Yes? What do you wish?”

Her eyes narrowed into shrewd slits. “I too wish to know the wonders of a man. Help me to find one, and I am at your disposal.”

I thinned my lips. “You do understand, my darling, that not all men are created equal? What you ask is a tall order. And because I have nothing but the utmost respect for you, I would see you have nothing but the best. And sadly, I have taken the best.”

Mine. Mine. Mine.

She shrugged. “Second best is fine by me. I find I am curious about your male and wish to know one of my own. At least to taste one.”

“Hm.” I eyed her. Lovely as she was, she had one fatal flaw. “It could take some time, love. There are few in this world that could handle your heat.”

She crossed her arms and tapped her foot. “A man for a boon. That is my wish.”

“Done.” I snapped my fingers. Surely there was someone out there who wouldn’t die under her touch. And if a few lost their lives in the search, well, they clearly weren’t worthy, right?

I smiled. “Now, about those tomatoes.” I pointed and fanned my lashes. “Pretty please.”

~*~

Thirty minutes later I shoveled the last tomato into my mouth, swallowed, and zipped myself on over to Tiera’s place. For being Earth, it would have been natural to expect to see lush grass and plant life everywhere, but there was nothing but rocks.

The place was flat, barren, and utterly bland.

There were no cute little imps to nibble on my fingers. There were no rock bunnies or Chihuahuas scampering up to come greet me.

To be honest, Tiera was as dull as the place she called home.

Wrinkling my nose, I followed the dusty trail to her house, which was nothing but a circular tower of gray stones that’d been leeched of most of its color by the sun.

“Tiera,” I called when I neared her steps. An “unwelcome” mat was placed on the doorstep.

It was literally unwelcoming. The words, to be more precise, said, “Leave now, or I’ll eat you.”

My sister was such a darling.

Tiera came out, scowling, a moment later. Her skin was pale gray, the type of color that came from rarely leaving the den she called a house. Skulking in shadow did that to a person.

She was dressed in drab colors from head to toe, and the only real color to her was her hair, a rich nutty brown she had twisted back into a tight bun that sharply revealed the harsh, straight planes of her angular face.

Tiera wasn’t hideous. None of us were. But she’d never been one who cared about her appearance, either.

“What the hell do you want, Thalassa?” she snapped without preamble.

“I just wanted to say hi.” I waved.

Of all my sisters, she’d be the toughest to convince. But I had a pearl up my sleeve, a little bauble she’d always wanted but I’d never quite been able to part with before.

Tiera had one weakness—precious stones. And the rarer they were, the more green with envy she became. There was one stone in particular she’d never be able to reach, as it only grew beneath my waters, and there was only one of them in existence. Oh yes, she’d play ball with me.

“No you don’t, you selfish beast. You hate me and I hate you, so just tell me what you’re here for and let’s get this over with.”

I huffed. “Well, fine, if you’re going to be that way about it. I want you to create an earthquake through all of Olympus. Just level it to the very ground.”

“No.” She thinned her lips and turned to go.

“Don’t you even want to know why?” I asked, racing around her so she was forced to look at me.

“Not really. Go away.”

She waved her hand at me.

Gods, Tiera really needed to work on her people skills. But I was determined to save my Death Boy, and one cranky wench wouldn’t stop me.

“Well, then, what if I told you I’d give you the Seren Stone for your pledge?”

She stopped, not saying anything but cocking her head.

Oh, I had the wench right where I wanted her. She smacked her lips.

The avarice was strong in her.

“Mmhmm.” I shook my head, bobbing my delicate octopus braid as I did so. “All yours, and the only string is, you do my bidding when I call. I mean, really, you can’t ask for a more perfect trade, now, can you?”

Her already thin lips puckered. “You’ve never been willing to part with that. Why now?”

“Because it’s important to me?” I shrugged. She’d not wanted to know my reasons earlier, so tough kazungas, lady, I was keeping Hades my secret.

Her jaw clenched. “If you’re lying to me—”

“Oh, sister.” I gripped her shoulders and shook her gently. “Do you honestly think me capable—”

I stopped, remembering the Heretical Wars of 1002. Okay, so maybe she had a point.

I held up my hands. “On my honor as the Water. No tricks, no games. All I want from you is to rock their world, but only if I say so. Right now, I mostly mean to use you as a threat, but if they push me, you do it. So whaddaya say, Sis, deal or no deal?”

“What if you don’t need me to level them—do I still get it?”

Dammit, she would ask that. Grumbling inwardly, I swallowed thickly and nodded reluctantly. “Of, of course, Tiera.”

“You trick me, and I’ll bury you.”

She could try, the cold-hearted-evil-manipulative-taking-my-Seren-Stone-even-if-she-didn’t-do-anything shrew! But I wasn’t here to start World War III.

“You have my word.” We shook on it, sealing the deal. A powerful rush of energy imploded from between our palms, rocking the land beneath our feet and shifting the stones.

Figuring now was as good a time as any to make my escape before I was accidentally on purpose flattened in a rock slide, I vamoosed on over to the final sister.

This was the one I’d held off till the end because of who she was currently hiding. I had a couple things to say to young Persephone that I didn’t want my boy toy knowing.

Aria’s home was as welcoming as Tiera’s was not. There wasn’t land, but the skies were a glorious sunny blue, and angelic sylphs winged through the skies, their songs reminding me of Gregorian chants.

The clouds were so fluffy and white, and it was instantly notable to me that Zeus depended mightily on the abilities of this sister. A gentle breeze carted the clean scent of spring on it. Flowers of first bloom, my beloved sea roses among them, saturated my lungs.

For all her flaws, Persephone could make beautiful treasures. Following the trail of her scent, I arrived in moments to my sister’s castle in the sky. It wasn’t built of stone or coral or any other type of common building material but rather of cumulonimbus clouds that sparkled like diamonds.

Aria, already knowing I’d arrived, daintily appeared on the drawbridge, silvery white hair and gown billowing behind her in a graceful arc.

“Sister.” She smiled. “I’d halfway expected your arrival to come much sooner than now.”

“Oh?” I lifted my brow.

Her smile was secretive. “I am guarding Persephone’s body, after all, and the gossip in Olympus is that you’ve fallen rather half mad for my beloved Under Lord.”

I would be jealous of her turn of phrase, but everyone knew Aria to be in love with another. She’d never admitted out and out just who that other was, but I had an idea. Though since my sister never offered up the name, I honored her wishes by keeping silent on the matter entirely.

“I suppose I have.” I brushed my fingers across the sudden rainbow that arched beside me. “And now I suppose you know why I am here.”

“I have my suspicions.” Her grin was spun of pure delight. “But first, you may go visit with the captive, as I’m certain that is whom you greatly wish to see.”

Stepping to the side, she gracefully swept a hand out so that I might walk past. Nodding my thanks, I followed the glittering staircase downward into the deepest parts of the cloud to where no light penetrated and only darkness ruled.

Down here, the gentle breezes were more like raging zephyrs slamming like fists against my body. But I was strong enough to bear it. Head held high, I continued my downward trek until I’d reached the deepest and darkest threshold and stared at the lone figure suspended before me.

Persephone had her eyes closed as though in sleep. Her rich brown skin glowed like freshly turned earth; it was that glow that allowed me to see her at all. I knew if her eyes were open, I’d see their enviable color, a very stunning shade of amethyst.

She had hair the color of ebony and a facial structure that’d once made Zeus weep to gaze upon it. There was no fault with Persephone’s looks; she was spring eternal. Even down here in this pit of darkness, her flowers bloomed, covering her from head to toe in a gown of blood-red rose petals. Baby’s breath threaded through her hair in winding loops.

I had never been prone to fits of jealousy; I was perfect. But I must admit to suffering a tiny pang of heart at the sight of her. Persephone was my antithesis in most every way. She’d had Hades almost since the dawn of man, and yet she’d spurned his devotion.

“Why?” I asked her, but of course, she did not answer. I continued talking. Even suspended in sleep as she was, I knew she heard me. In some recess of her mind, she was aware of my presence.

Lifting a brow, I shook my head. “He would have given you the world, and you denied him. I think I should never understand you, Sephone. I should hate you. I imagine most any goddess would. You had his complete attention and devotion nearly all your life, but no more.”

I shrugged. “He truly is mine. In every way. And I do not say this to mock or tease you. It is simply fact. Should you ever wish to seek an audience with him, I would not deny you. And should you do aught to try and take him from me, well, you’re welcome to try, my beauty, for I am secure in the knowledge that no other will ever turn his head again.”

I’d not really known what I’d come down here to say to her, but the words pouring from my mouth made absolute sense to my heart. I could almost imagine Nimue clapping proudly behind me. I smiled.

“I will leave you with one final pearl of wisdom: the very spring and root of honesty and virtue lie in good education. That is what this is, little flower. Embrace who you were truly meant to be, stop giving into the petty and vain selfishness inherent in our kind, and grow up. Take this time to think and mature. You lost something great, and you will never get it back. Mourn the loss of him now, and when the time comes for your release, smile, for the hour of your rebirth is at hand.”

With a farewell wave, I mentally patted myself on the back for a job well done.

Aria met me once I’d crested the top landing.

“You were far kinder than I’d have been.” She lifted a pencil-thin brow.

“I don’t know. I do not exactly care for the woman, but looking at her now, she looked so young. And it dawned on me that in many ways, she mostly is. Spring is birth. Persephone is like a young seedling, and I do hope she will grow up someday, but Hades did right by bringing her to you.”

“Ah, the wisdom of the eternal waters.” She brushed a thumb across my cheek. “And you should know that Hades did not bring her to me. Cerberus did, dragging her in one set of jaws. Very carefully, mind you. Even though the chit had cut off one of his heads, not a tooth punctured her body. No doubt Hades’ doing.”

“He is such a thoughtful brute that way.” I nodded, and she laughed.

“What need you of me, sister?”

“I simply need the threat of you, my dear. And what can I give you in return?”

“An invitation to the wedding.”

I hugged her. If there was a wedding, it wouldn’t be for a few years yet—at least fifty or sixty years from now. I wanted to make sure that once the honeymoon phase ended, we were still a perfect match. But I answered, “Done and done.”

~*~

I shook my groove thang when I entered Themis’s cave of wonders. I really did like her taste in music. Today there was a cheery pop beat blasting through her home.

Dressed in Spandex workout gear, Themis twirled on the balls of her feet, a sweaty, sloppy mess but laughing effervescently. Clapping her hands, she stopped the music, and her eyes sparkled.

“Praise be. I thought you’d never come.”

I raised a brow. Not like she’d called me back. I crossed my arms.

“Oh stop, pouting, Calypso. You could see my dilemma with your own two eyes. The man is as guilty as sin, and yet how could I honestly condemn him for that? I was in a pickle, and you know it.”

Not the way I saw it. Anyone with two eyes could figure out that he’d done what he’d done for a reason and that goddess or no, Persephone had needed a good spanking.

“Bah.” She swatted a hand. “Justice is blind and all that. Everyone tells me that I am to judge with the facts and with not my heart, but I find that organ growing softer with each passing day. I weighed Persephone’s sins, and they are many. I’ve no wish to release her from Aria’s keeping for the time being.”

But if she didn’t release Hades and prove he’d not killed the beast, then Zeus would still try to punish him. All knew there was no love lost between the brothers. Right or wrong, none of that mattered to Zeus. He wanted absolute authority, and Hades had always been a vexing thorn in his flesh.

She nodded. “Exactly right.”

But why not just reveal that Persephone lived, at the bare minimum?

“I tell them that, and they would scour the earth and all its hidden realms to find her. They would never stop, and Hades would still be tormented. And so my quandary remains. Hades is guilty, but my scales weigh him innocent. So what do I do?”

I had spoken with my sisters, and I’d come prepared in case she planned to fight me. But I could see now that there was still a way to use our combined forces to do my will.

Themis touched the tip of her nose. “And so our thoughts finally align. You know, you really are quite fascinating to speak with. Don’t be such a stranger, Calypso.”

I waved. She wasn’t quite so bad herself. “Yup. Till next time, bat.”

~*~

My final stop brought me right to Zeus’s throne room. I really hadn’t been in the mood to spar with each and every a-hole. I’d hoped by seeking a private audience Zeus, I could settle terms with him, one adult to another.

He glowered at me, he was naked, and there was a woman (again, not Hera) sucking on him loudly. There was another woman behind him shoving something into something. I wasn’t quite sure what, but I suspected there might be a carrot involved.

“What in the HELL do you want?” he thundered.

“Oh Zeus, Zeus, darling, why must we always fight so? I come not to shake the hornet’s nest today. I merely come on a peacekeeping mission.”

Broad nostrils flared. I could never see what women found so irresistible about him. Had to be magic. He was blinding them to his true form.

Actually, his true form was a complete mystery to most. Paintings had depicted him as a tree, once even as a swan, and as a man on many occasions, but I knew what he really looked like. I’d seen him born, after all.

But I’d vowed never to think on it again. And so I wouldn’t.

The women, like the good little sycophants they were, continued to service him, their perky little breasts bobbing up and down, up and down, as they squealed and exclaimed loudly as though pleasuring him were the best thing evah.

Honestly, I adored Death Boy, but I’d had to rub one out this morning. Pleasuring another was great, but getting pleasured was even better. But, none of my business.

“Peacekeeping.” He snorted as though he did not believe me. “Enlighten me, then, Calypso.”

“Toss out this ridiculous charge against Hades. Let him return to his realm and do what he does best: take care of his dead.”

When Zeus tossed his head back and laughed, bolts of lightning danced through his hall, filling it with the stench of ozone.

What a show-off.

“I think not.” He knuckled fat tears from his eyes.

I crossed my arms, remembering that I was here for peace. Peace. Peaccccce, ohhhhhmmmm, I mentally chanted. “What would you do with the Underworld, then? Hades can handle it now, but add torture to the equation and you’re looking at a big, fat, rotting mess. I hardly think you’d want that.”

His face contorted, and I knew what was coming. I’d seen that look on Dead Boy’s face a time or twenty. Curling my lip, I turned my back. I had no desire to see Zeus ejaculate rainbows, or whatever the hell he did.

Once I no longer felt the shudders roll through the floor, I peeked over my shoulder. The women were back to bobbing again, although this time they’d swapped places.

Ew.

“I’ve already chosen his replacement.”

Oh, how very convenient. That prick didn’t care if Persephone was dead or missing. His only concern was dethroning Hades. Because only Hades could actually make a power play for Zeus’s throne. Well, so could Psycho, but he was Zeus’s bitch in all things. But how could Zeus not realize by now that Hades had no desire to dethrone his brother?

Rubbing the bridge of my nose, I tried one last time to reason. “He’s got no plans to boot you to the docks, Zeus. Your title is secure.”

He lifted a brow, and at first I thought he was about to squirt out more rainbows, but I was wrong. “The gods are loyal to me. None of them would take his side, so my throne is already secure.”

“Oh, you fat bastard.” I stomped my foot. “I tried, but you’ve pushed me to it!” So angry I could spit nails, I exploded from this pathetic form into a geyser of water and glared at him. My words reverberated with the depths of my raw power. “Do as I say, or I shall see Olympus destroyed. You have three days, and then you are all gone. So I say. So it is decreed.”

A tsunami eighty stories high rolled through the confines of his chambers, sweeping the disgusting creatures away from me. Zeus was sputtering, slamming thunderbolts at my side, but I swatted them away.

“You are nothing, nothing to me, you fool! Today I rain fire. Tomorrow earth. And the day after that, I shall scatter you to the seas, a fate you shall never recover from. Send Hermes to me when you change your mind.”

Then, giving him one final, mighty shove, I returned to my home, to my sex slave.

All things considered, I thought I’d handled that affair rather well.

“Two points for Calypso. I think I deserve a gold star today.”