Josie

My heart was in my throat. It was how I woke nearly every morning, with a sweaty, trembling body and my heart fighting its way out of my chest. Night terrors weren’t a blast. They were exhausting and terrifying. I had hoped over the last four years, since I was saved from David, the night terrors would eventually fade. They hadn’t.

What helped them stay, my guess, was because I was weak.

It was also the fact that my life was upside down once again.

“Josie, time to get your cute butt moving,” Simone yelled from the hall. She would be walking past so she could get to the bathroom first, which was why I started taking showers at night; she took too long in the bathroom, making us both late.

Even though I had just woken with fright filling my veins, I smiled.

I smiled because Simone could do that to a person. That smile may not reach my eyes, but it helped me get out of bed each morning. It also helped me continue on each day to reach the goals I wanted to.

Climbing out of bed, I donned a pair of jeans and a flannel shirt. It was big, but warm on the colder days in winter times. Packing my bag, my mind drifted to my family in Ballarat. I wondered what they were all doing. Would Zara already be up with her twins who were turning three in a couple of months? Would Julian and Mattie’s plans for their wedding be all organised?

My thoughts even glided to Deanna, or Hell Mouth as most called her. It was only just over a year ago she had her baby boy, Nicholas. Zara had emailed me a video recorded by Dodge. I’d lost count of the amount of times I’d watched it. Still, every time had me laughing and smiling and then wishing I was home.

“Are you recording?” Zara asked, smiling into the camera.

“Is the fuckin’ light flashing red, Wildcat?” Dodge growled.

“Yes.”

“Then it’s recording.”

“Awesome.” Zara smiled and started walking down a hall. “Hey, Josie, I wish you were here today. We miss you so much. However, seems you’re working hard studying, I thought I’d share this special day with you this way.” She stopped, faced the camera, and clapped with glee. “Guess what, Deanna is having her baby right now.” She turned and then rounded the corner. The camera adjusted to zoom in on Deanna standing at the bar, one hand supporting herself on the wooden top while her body bent forward as she breathed hard.

Her head turned toward the camera, her eyes widening. “What in the fuck are you doing?”

“I’ve got Dodge to film it for Josie,” Zara said.

“Are you fucking high?” Deanna bellowed and then all thoughts flew from her mind when a contraction started. She moaned in pain. Griz stepped up behind her to rub her back.

“We need to get to the hospital,” he growled.

“Shit, shit, shit,” Deanna chanted. Her head turned to a smiling Zara and glared. “How in the fuck did you do this twice? You’re fucking crazy to want to go through it again. Crazy, stupid w-w-woman. Jesus,” she screamed. Zara wasn’t crazy. She was the nicest person I knew and I was so proud to call her my sister. What she was doing for Julian and our brother, Mattie, was amazing. Willing to give them a gift of having their own child...My sister was wonderful.

“Car’s ready. Let’s roll,” I heard Talon’s voice coming from somewhere off camera.

“This is where I hand it over to you, boss. I ain’t coming to the hospital,” Dodge said from behind the camera as it filmed Griz helping Deanna walk toward the hall to the front door.

“You promised my woman to do it, you’re fuckin’ doin’ it,” Talon ordered.

“Fuck,” Dodge snapped.

“What in the fuck are you looking at?” Deanna yelled at someone off camera. Only then her hand whipped out taking hold of some material.

“Princess, let Dive go.”

“You all should be in pain if I am,” Deanna yelled to the room. “You all need to suffer.”

“Believe me, we are,” Dodge uttered. Deanna turned to him. “Shit,” he hissed.

“Deanna, we’re gettin’ to the motherfuckin’ hospital before you pop our kid out here on the floor. Now move.”

“It isn’t the cleanest place,” Zara offered.

Griz glared at Zara and with Talon’s help, they moved Deanna out of the compound and into the car. Dodge, with the camera, climbed into the back of Griz’s four-wheel drive while Talon hopped in behind the wheel. Zara climbed into the passenger seat leaving Deanna and Griz to the back seat. Dodge leaned over the back seat to film Deanna resting her head on Griz’s legs. He ran his hand through her hair. I was lucky enough to see her soft smile.

The camera jolted around as the car moved. With Talon driving, I knew he would be swerving through traffic.

“I’m going to hurt you for this,” Deanna groaned, looking up at her man. Her hand came up and gripped his tee.

“I look forward to it, princess.” Griz chuckled.

“Zara,” Deanna screamed. “Oh, fuck, I feel like I want to push.”

“Oh, God,” Zara gasped.

“What?” Griz yelled.

“It means she’s close.”

“Kitten, will we make it to the hospital?”

“I need to push,” Deanna screamed. “Grady, you fucker, oh, God, I don’t want our kid born in our car.”

“It’ll be okay.” He nodded down at her. “Wildcat?” he asked in a panicked voice, a voice I had never heard from him before.

With wide eyes, Zara ordered, “Talon, pull over. Call an ambulance.” Once he did, she climbed out of the car, must have run around to Deanna’s side, because the door was flung open. “I need to take your panties off,” Zara said, her hands sliding up under Deanna’s skirt.

“Hot damn, girl action,” Dodge foolishly said.

The camera was then dropped and all I heard were voices.

“Shut the fuck up,” Griz growled. “Get out, get out now before I kill you.”

“Zara,” Deanna screamed.

“She’s crowning, the baby’s coming,” Zara yelled. “Push, Dee, push.”

“Come on, princess, you can do this.”

“Of...fucking...course...I...can,” Deanna bellowed.

In the next second, a baby’s cry was heard and my heart melted.

The video ended in the hospital, capturing Deanna, the hardest woman I knew, smiling sweetly down at her baby boy, with Griz standing protectively over them.

“Jose, come on, girlfriend,” Simone yelled. I opened my door and walked down the hall to see her waiting at the front door.

“Sorry,” I said and picked up my backpack from the floor just as we heard a door behind us open. Parker, looking sleep deprived, walked out of his room in nothing but boxers. I heard Simone sigh in appreciation. I would have also, but I quickly bit my bottom lip. He staggered his way to the bathroom at the end of the hall without a hello or anything.

“Damn, that man is fine,” Simone whispered. I gave her a tight-lipped smile and a small nod before I opened our front door and walked out. She was right though. Parker was fine. His body seemed as though it were etched from stone: hard and beautiful.

However, he was a mystery and I wasn’t sure what his life was like or if I wanted to actually know anything about it.

# # # #

It happened early that morning. Simone and I had gone to our class. During it, there was only one of Cameron’s friends taunting me. Coughing out harsh names and poking me in the back with his pen. Simone turned and glared at the guy, but she didn’t see the jabs, thank goodness, or else she would have made a scene. When the bell rang, knowing Simone had a class at the opposite end of the building, I quickly said goodbye and bolted from my seat and room.

The frigid air swirled around me, causing me to shiver as I rushed along the pathway to the building that held my next class. I gripped my backpack tighter in my arms against my stomach, wishing I had brought a jacket with me.

Unfortunately, I didn’t make it far before I felt someone behind me. My already hasty pace picked up another notch. Something brushed my back.

Please no.

Just leave me alone.

However, no matter the amount of inner begging I did, I knew I was out of luck when next my hair was tugged back violently, causing my steps to falter and I cried out in pain.

After righting myself, I turned around to face my assailant, only to cringe when a hand was wound around my waist. I tried to step away, but it tightened.

“Come on, girl. I know you said no to Cameron, but you’d be willing for me, yeah?”

Dropping my bag, I raised my hands and pushed against Scott’s chest. Scott was nearly as bad as Cameron, which could explain why they were best friends.

“Leave me alone,” I said, raising my glare to meet his eyes and then I cursed my lips as they trembled.

He chuckled. “I can’t do that. I’ve always wanted what Cameron wants and I plan to get it this time.” Two guys behind him laughed. When had they arrived?

It was then my heart seized in my chest as soon as I heard a certain noise.

My already tense body froze solid.

My eyes widened.

Was it?

Could it be?

Family?

“What...?” Scott said.

Blinking rapidly, I looked around everywhere to find that noise as I pushed harder against Scott’s chest. He started saying something to me, but my ears and eyes weren’t for him...no, they were for the two Harleys riding through the campus car park and coming to a stop just at the edge of the lawn.

My struggle continued. Couldn’t Scott see my attention wasn’t on him? Couldn’t he and his friends sense the trouble they would be in, depending on who was on those two bikes?

Suddenly, Scott must have noticed others around us looking toward the new arrivals. Scott stood straight, and I saw out the corner of my eyes as he gestured to his friends to the two men hopping off their bikes. Scott’s arm fell from my waist. I sagged in relief and drew in a deep breath. Only Scott’s hand quickly and tightly gripped my wrist.

It seemed he wasn’t willing to let me go as we all watched the two Harley riders unclasp their helmets, remove their sunglasses and place both on their seats. When they turned back to face me, I gasped.

Home.

Family.

Love.

Safety.

My free, trembling hand came up to my mouth to cover it as Caden and Eli stalked their way toward us. They both looked amazing, but also very unhappy. Caden dug a baseball cap out of the back pocket of his jeans and placed it on his head backwards. He seemed somewhat calmer than Eli, who was rolling his head side to side, also clenching and unclenching his hands.

They stopped just a foot in front of us. Caden’s gruff voice barked out, “You wanna let go of her.” It wasn’t a question. Every syllable was a demand, but Scott wasn’t smart enough to know that.

“Nope. You want to fuck off and mind your own business?”

Caden’s eyes hardened. His gaze travelled to Scott’s hand around my wrist. Slowly, he pulled his glare back up to me, and his eyes softened.

“Caden,” I uttered, my gaze flicked to the fuming man next to him. “Eli,” I whispered. Eli’s eyes touched mine briefly only to move back to Scott’s quiet friends watching the whole scene apprehensively. Eli was in the zone. That wasn’t good.

My eyes went to Caden, only his focus was back on Scott. He sighed and then snorted. “You don’t know it, but you’ll soon get it. She is ours—”

Scott burst out laughing. He tugged on my wrist so I was looking at him. “So you don’t hold out for everyone? Knew you were a slut.”

“Pick,” Eli growled, using Caden’s biker name.

“Not yet, Billy,” Caden ordered. I’d always liked Eli’s biker name, Billy the Kid.

Caden took a step closer. “You really need to get it and fuckin’ soon. Josie Alexander is ours, as in, she is fuckin’ family, and she is Hawks. Do you understand that, dickhead?”

In frustration, Scott’s hand gripped harder. I flinched from the pain and Caden saw it. Before I knew it, Caden had his hand around Scott’s throat. My wrist was instantly free because Caden was pushing Scott backward, so far back he collided with the building, and shrubbery surrounded their legs.

Worry settled deep. Worry they would soon be in trouble because of me.

There was so much to take in. Gasps, squeals and screams sounded around me.

Eli punched one of Scott’s mates and then the other. He dodged the fists flying his way and landed a hit to one of the guys’ stomach, causing him to double over. Eli went straight for the other and in seconds, after two jabs, the guy was on the ground.

Tense silence filled the air and then...

“This is your last chance, fucker. You go near Josie again, your life will fuckin’ end. She is a part of Hawks Motorcycle Club. You want to fuckin’ continue givin’ her shit, then payback—major goddamn payback—where your life will be not worth living will come your way. Do. You. Get. Me?” Caden growled so close into Scott’s face.

My head swung to Eli when he hissed out, “Move again and I will stab the fuck outta you.” To prove his point, he took a switch blade out of the back of his jeans and flipped it open.

“Eyes to me, cockhead,” Caden snapped at Scott.

Doors near us were banged open. Three lecturers ran through them and toward our way.

“Caden, please,” I begged.

“Right. Last warning, you go near her, look at her, or touch her, your life is mine.” With that, he pulled back his fist and punched Scott in the stomach and then stepped back as Scott crumbled over with his arms folded around his middle.

“Hey,” a lecturer yelled.

Without a thought, I made a step to Eli, who was the closest, reaching out a hand to touch his arm. He saw me coming, but my courage blinked out and my hand fell to my side. “You both have to go. I don’t want you in trouble. Please.”

“Precious,” Caden said first, my eyes went to him to see him smile. “Don’t worry about us.”

“What is the meaning of this?” Lee Eden demanded. He was one of my lecturers, the class I was supposed to be attending.

“Nothin’ at all. We just popped in to see our friend, Josie,” Eli said. My eyes ran over his body to see the switch blade he had held was no longer in sight.

Eden raised his bushy brows. He looked to the other two members of staff, ones I didn’t know. One shrugged and the other shook his head.

“Scott? Anything to add?”

Scott, with a scowl upon his face, stood tall and shook his head. “Nothing.”

A lecturer scoffed. “We saw the assault with our own eyes. Do you want to press charges?”

My heart stopped.

Caden snorted. “What you saw was me helping Scott. He was choking. I thought a tap to the stomach would help bring up whatever was stuck.” With a sweeping hand, Caden gestured to Scott. “And would you look at that, he’s fine now.”

“Scott?” Eden pressed.

“All good.”

“Fine. If you have class, best you get going.” With one final glare, he turned with the other staff members and walked off.

“Your warning has been noted,” Scott started and then smiled. “But good luck on getting Cameron to listen.” A friend of his tugged on his arm. Scott looked over his shoulder at him and nodded. “Looks like we’ll get some entertainment over the next week or so,” he finished and then walked off with his friends following.

For the first time, my heart settled and I drew in a deep breath. Slowly, my eyes moved back to the two men in front of me. Through hooded eyes I studied them. Caden wore jeans, a tank top, with his biker cut over it, and a backward baseball cap. Eli was dressed similar, only he wore a tee but with no cut over it.

“Precious,” Caden uttered. My heart jumped when his arms went wide. I shuffled forward and slowly touched my hands to his waist, next my forehead went to his chest. Both men were taller than I was.

Breathing deeply, taking in what consumed my thoughts every day, I wrapped my arms around his waist. His own arms settled down at his sides. He knew, more than anyone, I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to be touched. Too much had just happened. My senses were already haywire.

“Baby,” he whispered into my hair and ran his chin on the top of my head. My breath hitched.

Caden was here.

Eli was here.

With a final intake of all that was Caden—leather and warming spices—I turned from his arms and directly into Eli’s, who was waiting for me. Eli, knowing me also, rested his arms at his sides as I took from him the comfort I needed. Only these two men could I touch freely and from the whispered voices around us, maybe my unwanted attention or touching hadn’t gone unnoticed like I thought it had, then again maybe they were just admiring my men. My home.

“Sweetheart,” Eli said with a smile in his voice. I rubbed my cheek against his chest in answer, because I wasn’t ready to move or talk. His lips touched the back of my neck. I stiffened for only a second, but breathing in Eli’s scent of his Prada Luna cologne helped my mind to know I wasn’t in danger. I was being taken care of.

Stepping away, I asked, “What are you both doing here?”

“Just visiting, precious, and I’m glad we did. Who was that wanker?”

Shrugging, I looked to the ground and said, “Just an annoying someone.”

“Sweetheart, you wanna tell us what’s goin’ on and who Cameron is?” Eli asked.

“Maybe we should go somewhere first?” Caden suggested.

Nodding, because so many eyes were still on us, I thought it would be wise to get away from uni to somewhere more private. Not that I was sure I was going to tell them everything that had been happening. If I did, Cameron may only live ‘til the morning. Not that it would be a loss, but I didn’t want Caden or Eli to be arrested for anything, especially an idiot like Cameron.

“We can go back to my place,” I said and grabbed my mobile from my back pocket. All thoughts of returning to class left my mind. “I just have to let Simone know where I’ll be.”

“Who’s she?” Eli asked.

A stab of jealously gutted me. I didn’t like Eli asking, but I had no right over him or Caden. I had pushed them both away because I couldn’t pick between either of them and that situation hadn’t changed.

Clearing my thick throat, I answered, “A friend I live with. She’s been...everything since I came here.”

“We must thank her.” Eli smiled.

And how will you do that? I found myself snapping.

Good God. I needed to control myself. I had never had the urge to snap at anyone, no matter the situation. However, I found myself wanting to do anything and everything so Eli and Caden didn’t...what? Sway to someone else?

What was wrong with me?

Was it because I had missed them so much?

Because they reminded me of home?

No, they are my home.

Both of them?

How could I think that?

“Precious, you look exhausted. Let’s get you home.” Upon my nod, Caden picked up my forgotten backpack from the ground and steered me toward his Harley. After loading my items in his side-saddle, he asked where I lived. Thankfully, it wasn’t far from school. Once I informed him, he straddled his seat and patted the space behind him. If it were anyone else, I wouldn’t have climbed on behind him. But being Caden, or even if it were Eli, they both knew what I was comfortable with. So, as soon as I was seated, I placed my arms at his waist when he fired up his beauty. Finally, a smile lit my face as we pulled out of the park and rode off. It had been too long, too long since I was on a bike, and too long since I felt safe, surrounded in warmth from the two most important men in my life.