After three days of pretty much avoiding Beckett at home by leaving notes that I wasn’t feeling well and had gone to bed early, then getting out of the apartment before he gets up, I’ve decided to take Madison’s advice. I can’t go on like this and I have to know.

I’m going to talk to his sister.

I go to my bedroom to get my coat when I hear him talking on the phone through the vent. The only reason he’d be up this early is to talk with someone in the UK due to the time difference since by the time he gets home it’s the middle of the night across the pond.

I know, I know. I have to get past this. I was fine until the court hearing and then everything came flooding back.

I know I shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but I stop and sit on the edge of my bed and lean toward the vent.

We get along wonderfully. She’s terrific. Incredibly generous. A beautiful soul. It’s just...

It’s just... what? Finish your thought, Beckett! Is there something about me you don’t like? Dammit, I wish I could hear the other half of the conversation.

Yes, I have it. Charlotte gave it to me. Still, sometimes I feel like I wish someone would make the choice for me.

The conversation ends as whoever he’s talking with apparently has to get back to work. I get up, quickly grab my coat and head out the door.

More unanswered questions, but great to know he thinks so highly of me.

But is it because I’m exactly like his wife?

And what the hell did Charlotte give him?

***

ABOUT THE ONLY OPPORTUNITY I have to talk privately with Charlotte is on Saturday afternoon, so I’ve invited her to go Christmas shopping. After a couple of hours at the mall we’re both tired and stop at the food court for some drinks. (As usual, all the men come to a screeching halt as Charlotte passes.)

We sit at a corner table with our steaming cups of hot chocolate. “Thanks for inviting me, A.J. I really needed a break from the store.”

“I figured as much. You guys have been working yourselves to death over there.”

“True, though having your brother around makes it very enjoyable.” She flashes a big smile.

“I’ve never seen Tony like this. He’s really smitten with you.”

“The feeling is mutual. He’s a wonderful man and treats me so well.”

“I’d kick his ass if he didn’t.”

She laughs a bit. “You’re so spunky, A.J. I can see why my brother is so fond of you.”

“The feeling is mutual there as well.” I take a sip of my drink. “Charlotte, I’ve been wanting to ask you something about Beckett, and I’ll understand if you don’t want to talk about it.”

“What did you want to know?”

“I was wondering if you could tell me about his wife since he never talks about her.”

Her face drops a bit as she looks down for a moment. “Yes, I do try to avoid that topic as it stirs things up for my brother. As I’m sure you’ve noticed he’s been a bit... off... since the court hearing. I thought he had completely moved on but apparently not. However, I don’t mind telling you about Adrienne.”

“So, what was she like?”

“Sweet person. Very old-fashioned values. Deeply religious. She was quiet until she got to know you, but still a bit shy. I liked her a great deal. Everyone liked her.”

“Was she from the UK?”

“No, Beckett met here. Native New Yorker. Italian girl, like yourself. Incredible cook. Smart. They were a very good match and I knew they’d be married forever. He was, of course, devastated when he lost her. It was nearly a year before I saw him smile again.”

“Charlotte... I, uh... when I was in Beckett’s apartment I spotted their wedding album, and... I saw her picture.”

She slowly nods. “Oh.”

“So you can probably guess what I’ve been thinking.”

“I don’t have to guess. I’d be wondering the same thing. The incredible resemblance you have to her. You want to know if that’s the reason my brother likes you.”

“Yeah.”

“It’s not, A.J. The day after he met you at that fundraiser he told me he’d seen a woman who looked exactly like Adrienne. That you seemed like a nice person and he was interested. I saw the excitement in his eyes and was worried he was trying to find the exact replacement for his wife. So I told him to tread carefully and to judge you on your personality, not your appearance. Of course, once you two went out a few times and he got to know you, he realized you were nothing like Adrienne.”

“How so?”

“Oh, A.J., you’re complete opposites. She was quiet. You’re outgoing with a bold life force. She was demure, you’re spunky. Adrienne wanted to simply stay at home, raise children and be an old fashioned homemaker. You have your own business and are very independent. Her idea of a Saturday night date was staying home and watching television or playing cards. You like to go places and have fun. About the only thing you two have in common is that she loved cats. While your striking resemblance to her was the reason for Beckett’s original attraction, he quickly realized you were very different.”

“And yet he was still interested.”

“Why wouldn’t he be? You’ve got a great personality and a huge heart. One of the most generous people I’ve ever met. I guess that’s the other thing you have in common with Adrienne. Both beautiful souls.”

I feel my eyes welling up a bit. “I, uh... I’m sorry for—”

“It’s only natural you’d want to know about his past. But please, if you’re thinking he looks at you as a copy of Adrienne, you couldn’t be more wrong.” She reaches across the table and taps my chest. “He fell for you, for what’s in here. If he wasn’t attracted to your soul, your appearance wouldn’t matter one bit.”