Thanksgiving ended up being far more awkward than Gabe expected. Tristan didn’t ask him to uninvite Shane and Noel, but he actively avoided them the entire two hours the pair spent in the house. Gabe had never seen Tristan’s inner Angry Bitch until now, and he kind of felt sorry for Noel. Noel was visibly miserable over Tristan ignoring him for the last five days.

Gabe didn’t interfere, though, and neither did Shane. This was for Tristan and Noel to work out.

After everyone ate and their guests left, Gabe and Tristan spent the rest of the day in the den, watching Christmas movies with Bear and Dad. All of the early, black and white classics, a lot of which Tristan had never seen. Exposing him to the cozy charm of White Christmas was a lot of fun and smoothed out the feathers that Noel had ruffled by showing up.

Gabe’s biggest surprise came the next morning when Bear knocked on his door and said he had a visitor downstairs. He left Tristan sleeping in bed, threw on some clothes and padded down to the living room, incredibly curious who was bothering him at eight o’clock in the morning.

Debbie was sitting on the sofa, her hands folded in her lap. She was dressed, her hair smooth, and he swore she was wearing makeup. She smiled brightly when she saw him.

“I know it’s a day late, but happy Thanksgiving, Gabriel,” she said.

“Uh, yeah, you too.”

Bear hovered near the arch that led into the kitchen, and Gabe appreciated the backup.

“I came over to ask you something,” she said.

“Okay.”

“Will you drive me to Baybrook House?”

Gabe nearly fell over as the weight of the request smacked him in the gut. She wanted to go to rehab. She wanted him to drive her there so he knew she’d go through with it. He couldn’t process anything in that moment, so he settled on staring. Waiting for the shock to wear off and let him react.

“I’ve hated these two weeks, you cutting me out,” Debbie said. “I know I’ve screwed up beyond the point of forgiveness, but I love you so much. I want to do this. I want to give you a chance to love me again.”

His heart twisted. “I do love you, Mom. That’s why I did what I did and said what I said.”

Her eyes glittered with tears. “So you’ll do it? Take me to New Jersey?”

“Of course. Yes.” His eyes stung and he blinked hard. “When?”

“As soon as you have time. I’ve been sober for the last eight days. It wasn’t easy, believe me, but I stopped drinking. I took some stuff to a pawn shop like you said. I even vacuumed the entire house yesterday.”

He laughed at that, because he couldn’t remember the last time she’d used the vacuum. “I am so proud of you. You have no idea.”

She stood, still grinning. “You don’t know how much I needed to hear you say that. I’m doing this for me, but it’s for you too. I’d rather be a part of your life than hold onto old grudges.” She glanced at Bear. “I’m sorry, Bernard. So sorry for how I’ve treated you both.”

Bear nodded.

“We’ll go today,” Gabe said. He wasn’t giving her a chance to change her mind.

“Don’t you work at noon?” Bear asked.

“I’ll call in sick. I haven’t called in a sick day since I started there.”

“Don’t put yourself out for me,” Debbie said.

“He’s been putting himself out for you for years,” Bear snapped.

Debbie flinched. “I never asked him to.”

“But you never thanked him for it, did you?”

Gabe hated hearing Bear turn his temper onto Debbie, but he also knew better than to get in the middle when his parents went to war.

“I know I was wrong,” Debbie said. She seemed stuck between contrite and annoyed—two things that never ended well with her. “I’m a terrible mother, okay? Is that what you want me to say?”

“No, it’s not. I want you to apologize to our boy for how you treated him. He’s worked his ass off taking care of you. He might as well have set the money on fire for all the good it’s done him.”

“I’m sorry—”

“Stop apologizing to me, woman! Apologize to your son.”

“Do not order me around. You lost that right when you screwed another man behind my back.”

Gabe retreated slowly, intent on the stairs. He didn’t want to witness this. Good news was slowly disintegrating into reruns of old drama, and he was tired of it.

“Right, let’s make sure we turn this into another episode of Poor Debbie,” Bear said. “This is supposed to be about Gabriel, not you.”

“It is about him.”

“Then act like it.”

Gabe’s back hit the banister. A warm hand came down on his shoulder. He looked up, expecting Dad. Tristan blinked down at him, worry all over his face. God, he didn’t want Tristan to hear this. Tristan didn’t need any more ugly in his life.

Debbie crossed her arms as she turned to face Gabe. She froze, her attention past him. On Tristan. Her demeanor changed instantly, from furiously rigid to openly welcoming.

“Who’s this?” she asked.

Bear appeared in Gabe’s line of sight while still keeping his distance from Debbie. He frowned, clearly unhappy that Tristan had witnessed their family dysfunction.

“My boyfriend Tristan,” Gabe replied.

“Hello,” Tristan said weakly. His hand squeezed Gabe’s shoulder.

“Hi,” she replied. “I’m Debbie Harper, Gabriel’s mother.”

No fucking shit.

No one said anything, and the awkwardness level of the entire situation rose several notches.

“Anyway, I stopped by to give Gabriel some good news,” Debbie said. “So I guess I’ll leave.”

“Pack whatever clothes you want to take with you,” Gabe said. “I’ll be by before lunch to pick you up.”

“Okay. I love you.”

“Yeah.”

Her departure settled the tension around Gabe, and he sagged against the banister.

Tristan came down and cupped his cheek with one hand. “Are you okay?”

“I’m not sure. I think so.” He pressed into Tristan’s touch. “She’s agreed to go to rehab, and she asked me to drive her there.”

“Really?” Tristan yanked him right into a tight hug. “That’s great news! Oh my God.” He pulled back. “Wait, are you okay with driving her?”

“Yeah, I am. Honestly, it’s the only way I trust that she’ll get there.”

“I don’t blame you.”

“Be careful with her,” Bear said. His tone was flat, his expression hard to decipher. “Don’t let her manipulate you.”

“I won’t,” Gabe replied. “But I need to see this through.”

“I know you do. You’re a good kid.”

Bear wandered off.

“I guess I should take a shower and get ready to go,” Tristan said.

Gabe hated it every single time Tristan had to leave. “I would have had to work today, anyway. Paulo will be pissed at me for calling out on Black Friday, but this is more important.” The trip to the rehab facility would take about five hours round trip, and he’d come home mentally exhausted. The idea of coming home to Tristan held so much appeal the words were out before he could think. “You can stay here while I’m gone. Watch TV or read or something.”

Tristan tilted his head, considering the offer. “Do you think your dads will mind?”

“No. They both really like you.”

“Then I’ll stay. I like your room. It’s familiar. It’s everything I remember so clearly before the acc—the bashing.”

Gabe grinned. “Then stay. Eat. Hang out.”

“Awesome. And now I know I can be here when you get home. I doubt this is going to be a fun road trip.”

“No, it won’t. But I hope it’s worth it in the long run.”

“So do I.”

* * *

Gabe left on his errand after a quick breakfast of scrambled eggs and bacon. Tristan savored every morsel of the homemade food. The meals at Benfield were decent enough, but it was cooked in mass quantities. Something about watching three eggs being whisked at a time just made them taste better.

Tristan made himself comfortable in Gabe’s room and started channel surfing. His habit of jumping from one thing to next had always driven his roommates nuts. Especially Chris. He was “pick a channel and watch it”, while Tristan flipped to the next program once a commercial started.

He hated commercials.

They even had commercials for programs online, which didn’t seem quite fair but whatever.

A home renovation show with hot twin brother hosts caught his attention until the first commercial break. He hopped over to a game show, and then a sitcom he didn’t recognize. Rinse, repeat. Another change landed him on a program with a blond cop in uniform who made him instantly think of Noel.

His heart ached with how much he missed Noel. He also burned with anger over the secret Noel had kept from him. He couldn’t avoid Noel forever. Their friendship meant too much to him to ruin it over this. But he was making a point, damn it.

I’m also being kind of childish.

Problem was he didn’t have a cell phone. He needed to get one now that he was spending more time away from Benfield. Even a cheap pay-by-the-month phone, so he didn’t feel so disconnected when he was alone.

He checked the front cover of his latest notebook—something he still carried and took notes in, although less frequently. He was able to recall so much without help, but some habits would be hard to break. The notebook was a touchstone of sorts. And Noel’s cell number was written in it.

Tristan took the notebook downstairs. Bear was watching TV in the den, his feet up on a big ottoman.

“Bear?”

He immediately muted the sound. “What’s up, kiddo?”

“I was wondering if I could use the phone. I need to call someone.”

“Sure. Room to the left of Gabe’s is our office. There’s a landline in there.”

“Thank you.”

“Sure thing. You gonna make amends with your friend?”

“Yes.” Something about Debbie’s visit had inspired Tristan to forgive. “It’s time. I don’t want to keep punishing him.”

“Good boy.”

The unexpected praise warmed something inside of Tristan. Knowing a parent was proud of him for something as simple as ending an argument meant the world to him. It was something his own parents would never give him, and he was okay with that. He’d been accepted into Gabe’s family without hesitation.

The door next to Gabe’s was shut, and he felt weird opening it, even with permission. The office wasn’t quite what he expected. Two recliners with lap trays for computers. A bookcase full of all kinds of books. Mostly queer books, from nonfiction to fiction. And the walls. Painted a pale blue, they were covered in framed photographs of men in various stages of dress. All of them were artsy, none pornographic.

“I could work in an office like this,” he said to the beauties all around him.

The phone was shaped like a pair of red lips, and it made Tristan laugh out loud. He shut the door, sat on one of the recliners and dialed Noel’s number.

On the fifth ring, he’d resigned himself to voice mail. It was an unknown number, after all. Then, “Officer Noel Carlson.”

The sound of his voice made Tristan’s heart skip. “Hey.”

“Tristan? Hey, how are you?” His relieved, eager tone reinforced the decision to call.

“I’m good. I’m sorry I was such a jerk at Thanksgiving.”

“Don’t apologize. I know you’re mad at me, and I do not blame you. Not even a little bit. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you about the power of attorney.”

“You don’t have to explain why you didn’t before the trial started working, but after?”

Noel was silent for a long while. “Same reason as always, I guess. I wanted to protect you. I knew finding out that your parents wanted out would hurt you.”

“Yeah, well, finding out from Shane hurt even more. He assumed I knew.”

“I know. It wasn’t his fault, and he was justifiably pissed at me for a few days. I put both of you in that position, and I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to protect me anymore, Noel. Not from anything, but especially important stuff. We’ve never kept secrets from each other, and I hate that you kept this from me.”

“I know. All I can say is I’m sorry.”

Tristan harrumphed. “That’s not all you can say.”

Another pause. “I’ll never lie to you again?”

“Bingo. Now once more with feeling.”

“I swear I’ll never lie to you about your life, or keep life-altering secrets from you. Hand to God.”

“That’s better. Okay. I forgive you.”

Noel let out an audible sigh. “Thank you. I’ve missed you.”

“Me too.”

“So why’d you finally decide to forgive me?”

“Gabe’s mother.”

“Huh?”

Tristan briefly explained the situation without giving away too many details. It wasn’t really his family drama to share, after all. “Gabe’s wanted this for so long, and his mother was brave enough to try. I realized some things are more important than grudges.”

“I’m glad. For us and for Gabe. I mean it.”

“Thanks.”

“So if he’s driving to New Jersey, where are you? I don’t know the number you’re calling from.”

“I’m at his dads’ house. He offered to let me stay for the day, instead of dumping me back at Benfield. How could I turn that down? They have way better cable here.”

Noel’s laughter rumbled over the line. “Sounds like you’re settling in.”

“I kind of am. His dads are awesome, especially Bear. I’d ask Bear to adopt me if I wasn’t fucking his son.”

This time Noel sputtered. “Jesus, don’t do that when I’m drinking.”

“Ha! And I wasn’t even trying for a spit take. What are you drinking?”

“Iced tea. Coffee hasn’t finished brewing yet.”

Friday midmorning. Noel was off on Thursday nights, but he usually slept in when preparing for going back to work Friday night. “I woke you up.”

“It’s fine. I’ll take a nap later before I go in. I’d rather do this than sleep.”

“Good answer.”

“So do I have your permission to visit on Sunday like usual?”

“Of course you do, dummy. And can you do me a favor? Tell Shane thanks for taking care of me Saturday when I freaked out.”

“He told me about that.” Tristan could hear the cringe in Noel’s words. “I’ll pass along the message.”

“Cool.” Shane and Saturday brought back a sliver of their conversation. “So how come you and Shane haven’t watched one of his scenes together?”

“I—what? Really, Tristan?”

“It’s a legit question. Me and Gabe watched one of his together, and it was totally hot.”

“Okay, two things to end this particular conversation. One, I’m not you. Two, Shane is not Gabe.”

Noel code for “drop the subject, I don’t want to talk about it”.

“Duh and duh,” Tristan replied, “but I get the point.”

“If you’re watching his scenes together, it must really not bother you that he still does porn.”

“It really doesn’t. I mean, I know he doesn’t want to do it forever. And if his mom can get clean and start supporting herself again, maybe he can quit if he wants. Plus, it’s not like he won’t still get residuals from his old stuff.”

“This is true.”

“Doesn’t Shane get those?”

“No. He was always paid upfront.”

“He needed the money because his brother was sick.” A month ago, Tristan wouldn’t have remembered that. He wasn’t sure when was the last time he’d been told. Knowing it and recalling it was enough.

“Right.”

“Then I guess it makes sense you and Shane kind of ignore it. So do you guys watch other porn?”

“Your obsession with our sex life is disturbing,” Noel said with laughter in his tone. “I’ve missed it.”

“I know, right?”

“So you want to hear about a call we responded to the other night that involved a turkey on someone’s roof?”

“Definitely.” Tristan relaxed into the recliner, more than ready for one of Noel’s fun work stories, delighted to have his best friend back.

* * *

The drive to New Jersey wasn’t as painful as Gabe expected it to be. He and Debbie spoke very little. They listened to the radio, occasionally commenting on the countryside. She fidgeted a lot, which didn’t surprise him. This was a huge step for her. If she left rehab before the four weeks were over, she was done. She wasn’t coming back into the house.

Shit’s finally real and she knows it.

His phone’s GPS got them there with no fuss. A white gate protected a long, winding driveway that led to a huge white building in the middle of a well-tended field. Splotches of trees and frozen flowerbeds were coated with a thin dusting of snow. He followed signs to Inpatient Drop-Off under a carport. Big glass doors hid whatever was inside.

Debbie stared out the windshield with wide eyes. “How can you afford a place like this?”

No way was he telling her about Chet’s generosity. She’d probably blame herself for Gabe accepting charity, or something. “It’s taken care of. Don’t worry about it.”

“Gabriel—”

“I mean it. All you need to think about is getting better.”

Gabe double-parked and shut off the engine.

“You’re coming in?” Debbie asked.

“Yes. We’re both seeing this through.”

He got her suitcase from the trunk. She hesitated before taking that first step toward the front doors. He followed, knowing how hard this was, and so grateful to see her going on her own steam. She straightened her shoulders right before the doors slid open on a track.

The foyer had white stone floors, blue walls and a simple wooden admittance desk in the center. No chairs, no magazines. Nothing to suggest people were kept waiting. A petite brunette behind the desk smiled brightly at them.

“Welcome,” she said. “My name is Alice. Have you come to begin your journey with us today?”

“Um, yes,” Debbie replied. “My name’s Deborah Harper. You’re expecting me.”

Alice typed something into a computer. “Yes, we are. Your room is ready for you, Ms. Harper. I need to fill out some paperwork, and then we’ll get you settled.”

“Okay.”

Gabe waited through the paperwork, which Debbie completed with amazing calm.

To him, Alice said, “I’m sorry, but after this point, Ms. Harper won’t be allowed visitors for the first fourteen days of our program.”

“I know,” Gabe said. He’d practically memorized the pamphlet before giving it to his mother. He turned to Debbie, whose eyes were wet. “You can do this, Mom. I know you can.”

“You believing in me is everything, Gabriel,” Debbie said.

She didn’t try to hug him, and he was glad. He couldn’t remember the last time they’d shared a genuine hug, and he didn’t want their first to be here. He waited until a pair of double doors swung shut behind Debbie and Alice, and then he left.

The drive home was a blur of conflicting emotions, and finding Tristan napping on his bed was the very best thing to come home to. Gabe kicked off his shoes and curled up behind Tristan, pulling him close. Tristan snuffled, then settled.

For the first time in a long time, Gabe truly believed everything was going to be all right.