Present
“WAKE UP, DIABLA roja,” a deep voice rumbles as it parts its way through the fog clouding my mind.
I blink away the confusion and take in the eyes before me. Dark brown. Piercing. Calculating. Esteban.
“Morning.”
He’s not smiling, though. And while that’s not uncommon for Esteban, I sense something is wrong.
“We need to discuss a few things,” he bites out. When I stare at him with a frown for a second too long, his palm cracks across my thigh. “¡Levantate!”
My flesh stings, but I jolt into action. The last thing I want is Esteban angry with me. I don’t want to see that fury flickering in his eyes, like the night he took my mother and I from her house after I witnessed the death of my father. That night he was furious and roaring about revenge and what was owed to him.
He stole me.
And my mother.
Our families were joined by business, and I’d always hoped they’d be by matrimony one day as well.
But nothing went as planned. Everything was destroyed.
“Whatever it is that’s going on in your head, I want it gone,” Esteban snaps as he snags my wrist in his brutal grip.
My heart rate skitters in my chest, and I clumsily follow after him. He’s fully dressed in a pair of slacks and a white button-down shirt that fits his muscled body like a glove. I, on the other hand, am dressed exactly how he likes me. Which is not dressed at all.
“Sit,” he commands and points to the floor in front of a chair in the small living room.
I nod and fall to my knees. My head starts to throb much like it always does these days. I’m sure it’s because I always feel so hungry. Maybe today he’ll feed me more than just a sandwich. He takes a seat in the chair and gently grabs my throat to pull me between his thighs. I look up at him with wide eyes as my palms caress his knees through his slacks.
“What did I do wrong?” My voice is but a whisper, but I know he hears me. Esteban never misses a thing. Not when it comes to me. That’s one thing I can say about him. I’m his entire focus. I’ve never been anyone’s entire focus before.
His hard gaze softens as he leans forward. A large palm strokes the side of my head, and I lean against it. My eyes flutter closed as I relish his gentle touch.
“Look at me,” he murmurs, his fingers twisting into my hair.
I pop my eyes back open and fixate on his mouth. Just thinking about where his mouth was last night sends a ripple of need coursing through me. He may not drug me like he did my mother, but I’m completely addicted to him. It’s his touch I need. His dark eyes roaming over my body. The deep rumble of his voice quaking down to my very soul.
I’ve never felt so consumed before. Not even by Oscar.
My heart rate quickens at the thought of his name. Thinking about Ozzy confuses me. Several days ago, Esteban spoke to him over the phone. He said he’d be coming out to meet with us. I wonder if all connection with Oscar has been severed. If I’ll ever feel about him the way I seem to feel about Esteban. My mind can’t comprehend turning off all of these feelings for Esteban in the blink of an eye and switching back on how I felt for Oscar. Everything is hazy and all messed up. If I could just get rid of this headache, maybe I could think clearly.
A sharp slap to my face stuns me, and I clutch my stinging flesh. The throb in my head intensifies. I dart my eyes up to Esteban’s which are blazing with fury.
“We spent so many months teaching you how to behave. Who you belong to. And for what? For you to forget it the moment I take you out of your metal prison? Do we need to go back and start over?” he hisses, the brutal grip on my hair tightening.
I start to shake my head but I can’t move it. Swallowing, I force out my words. “N-No. I’m just tired, I think. Hungry.” While it’s technically a lie about where my thoughts have been, I am tired and hungry. Ever since leaving the container, I can’t help but feel starved all the time. Esteban brings me my meals. Esteban feeds me. But it never feels like enough. And everything seems foggy—as if Esteban is the lighthouse beaconing for me. Everything around me feels like a blur.
“You can eat later,” he hisses. “We need to talk about tonight.”
I try not to fixate on the way his nostrils flare with anger. Sometimes they flare when his face is between my thighs as he inhales me. Sometimes they flare when he grabs me by the throat and pins me to the bed.
Focus, Vee.
“You belong to me,” he bites out, and his grip in my hair loosens. He goes back to petting the side of my head, like I’m his dog. “Whatever childhood fantasies you had of growing up to marry my little brother are over. At one time, our families would have supported that. Now that it’s just the three of us left, everything will play out differently.”
My gaze falls to his lips. I wonder if he’s eaten anything today.
“Do you understand, Roja?”
Upon hearing the pet name he coined for me, my mind flashes to several days ago when I was his prisoner, trapped in a metal container he’d kept me in for months. When he’d left to try and steal Brie, so I’d have a friend. It ended up nearly getting him killed in the process. As a result, my mother died from heroin withdrawals, and I was on the brink of starvation. But he came back. He came back and plucked me from that nightmare. This safe house in San Diego feels like a dream in comparison.
“Roja!” he snaps, jerking me from my thoughts.
I nod rapidly and slide my palms higher along his thighs. Anything to coax him out of this tense mood he’s in. “I’m yours.”
His features relax, and I feel proud that I’ve pleased him. Maybe he’ll fix me a giant sandwich with extra turkey and—
“He must not find out about…” he trails off and scratches his jaw as if to search for the correct word. “He must not find out about how you and I came to be a couple.”
I may not be drugged up on heroin like my mother, but Esteban is definitely running through my veins. I don’t understand how he burrowed his way under my skin. Months ago, I hated him. Now, my skin tingles at the mention of the word couple.
Deep down inside, a part of me screams. It’s a silent scream, but I feel it in my bones.
He stole you. He raped you. He killed your mother. Fuck Esteban.
But since he’s bubbling in my veins like the hot liquid drug that makes strong people weak, thoughts of him silence the part of me that screams in protest.
Esteban saved you from the metal box.
Esteban saved you from the stench of your mother’s rotting corpse.
Esteban brought you to this home to feed and care for you.
“I love when you look at me that way, Roja,” he murmurs, lust thick in his voice. “I want to see those adoring eyes on me while you worship my cock.”
A smile touches my lips as my fingers skate along the hard outline of his erection in his slacks to his belt. He usually feeds me after sex, but especially if I blow him. Eager to not only please him but also to eat, I yank at the leather and work frantically to free his dick. I’m overwhelmed with the need to please him. The past few days have been heaven with him trapping me beneath him while he fucks me wildly. After all those months in the metal box, this life with him is manageable. I’m safe and cared for under his watch. Today, though, he’s regarded me differently, and I hate it. I want the look of desire back in his eyes. The pure, unfiltered look of possession. And I want a damn sandwich.
His cock is hot in my hand the second I grip my fingers around it. My mouth waters to lick his tip and show him how good I can be for him. He lets out a slight hiss of air when my thumb runs along the side of his shaft, which is all I need to dive in. I slide my parted lips over the head of his length and let my tongue taste the underside of him. A grunt rumbles from him as he takes handfuls of my hair on each side of my head. His grip isn’t harsh, like it sometimes can be. It’s just firm enough to guide me the way he likes.
I work him up and down with my fist while dancing circles with my tongue. His girth is wide enough to make my jaw ache, but not bad enough that I can’t push him deep into my throat. The moment I relax my muscles and swallow him, he lets out a string of curse words in Spanish. I smile against his cock but don’t slow my movements. I’m about to pop off of him for a moment to catch my breath, but his grip on my hair stops me. His hips thrust up as he shoves my face against him. His sudden deep intrusion causes me to gag. Drool runs out of my mouth and along his cock while I wriggle to get away.
“That’s it,” he hisses. “Take every inch.”
Tears from not being able to breathe stream down my cheeks. I dig my fingernails into his thighs to let him know I can’t take any more. This only seems to turn him on more because with a long grunt and an extra brutal thrust of his hips, he comes down the back of my throat.
I gag and gag but thankfully don’t throw up—not that there’s anything in my belly to expel, anyway. Finally, when I feel as though I might black out, he releases me. I jerk off his cock and gasp for air. Snot runs from my nose and down over my lips.
His face is impassive as he sets to putting his cock back inside his boxers and slacks. I stare at his features while they’re distracted.
He will always be like this. Remember what he did to your best friend?
I silence my inner screamer with a flash of inner rage. My best friend abandoned me. Married into the family I was supposed to marry into, dragging grown men on their knees behind her in her wake. Oscar had been drawn to her. Duvan had fallen for her. And Esteban had fucked her.
Thoughts go to my father…
Daddy was obsessed with her and now he’s gone.
While Brie was off living the good life, I’d been stolen by the man who hurt her. I was starved and beaten and fucked right out of my sanity. I was forced to listen to my mother die in a metal cage. All because Brie made smart men stupid. All because Brie was too selfish to come for me.
If the situation were reversed, I would have gone for her.
Tears don’t fall, though. Instead, anger bubbles in my chest. This is my world now. Esteban may not be perfect, but at least he wants me. Unlike Oscar. Unlike Brie. Unlike anyone else.
“You’re to do exactly as I say,” Esteban growls as he tugs me into his lap.
My eyes find his and I straddle his muscular thighs. I can’t help but touch him with greedy fingers. I’m sure I look a mess with my drool and snot and watery eyes, but he looks at me as though I’m perfect.
“Of course,” I tell him with a smile. “Can you feed me now?”
He smirks before pulling me against him. “Oh, Roja,” he says with a chuckle. “I just fed you.” His fingertips stroke me until I’m dozing off. I inhale his scent and it reminds me of the first time I smelled him up close. It helps the pain in my belly disappear.
“Ozzy?” I question as I peek inside another door. My parents and I just arrived at the Rojas’s for the summer. I’m dying to find him and hope he notices I’m wearing makeup. Daddy made me wait until I turned fourteen to start wearing it. Well, I’m fourteen now, so Oscar will have to notice me.
I adjust my push-up bra and wander along the hallway until I get a whiff of weed. My nose scrunches at the smell, but I follow it in hopes it’ll lead to Ozzy. When I push through the door, I enter a darkened room. Dark curtains cover the window, and the only light comes from a black light on the wall.
“Oscar?”
A female giggles, and I jerk my head over to see a woman straddling Duvan’s lap. She’s blowing smoke into his mouth. My gaze lingers on them. Duvan is several years older than Ozzy and I. Where my best friend is lanky and boyish, Duvan is all man. He’s in college now and has muscles.
I’m still staring at them when Duvan seems to notice me. “Vienna. Did you lose your way from your mommy?”
The dark-haired woman in his lap jerks her head to glare at me and then laughs upon seeing me. Her boobs are giant and bounce with her giggles. I suddenly feel like a kid in comparison. I mean…I am only fourteen but most days I feel grown up. Not today, though. Today I’m staring at her chest, wishing for humongous breasts like hers.
“I was looking for Oscar,” I tell him, dragging my gaze from the woman’s chest.
Duvan smirks and accepts more smoke from the woman who’s no longer interested in me. His hands lazily roam her butt while I stare in wonder. Maybe one day, Oscar will touch me like that. I’ll have boobs, and he’ll want to squeeze them with his hands.
“I should go,” I murmur and start to back out.
“You should stay.” The deep voice behind me causes me to jump.
Esteban.
He’s the scary brother.
When I turn around, he’s staring at me like I’m a little mouse with its leg caught in a trap. Like he’s a big cat with sharp teeth and he wants to shred my flesh straight from my body. I shiver but attempt to calm myself. Esteban won’t do anything to me—not with Daddy downstairs. My dad would kill him.
“Sit, Roja,” Esteban commands, his eyes unnaturally white and evil looking in the black light. “Hang out with the adults for awhile.”
When I don’t move, he grabs my elbow and ushers me into Duvan’s room and over to the sofa. I’m forced to sit. Esteban sits down beside me and stretches out his long legs. He’s a giant compared to Ozzy. When I look at Esteban, I see someone who’s no longer the young teen from my youth. He’s this grown man—a man who’s done terrible things, based on what Oscar has told me. I don’t like him one bit.
“You smoke?” he questions as he leans across me to access the side table.
His masculine scent envelops me, and I shiver.
“I haven’t tried it, no.”
Duvan is too busy playing with his girlfriend to notice that his brother is attempting to get me high. My daddy will be so angry if he finds out I’ve been up here with these men.
“Nice bra,” Esteban says with a wolfish grin.
I snap my gaze down and gape in horror. My tight light-orange T-shirt is practically transparent in the weird lighting. The white push up bra underneath glows!
“Oh my God,” I shriek and cross my arms over my chest.
He laughs at me as he lights a joint. I watch the way his stubbly cheeks suck in as he inhales. The way his full lips part and the smoke billows from his mouth. Then, he smirks and hands it to me.
“Your turn.”
When I don’t reach for it, he shrugs. “Didn’t take you for a pussy, niñita. Guess I was wrong.”
Fire flashes inside me, and I snap the joint out of his hand. I bring it to my lips and attempt to mimic his actions. As soon as the strange smoke fills my lungs, I start coughing. Esteban’s booming laughter upsets me as I choke. When I can finally breathe normally again, I glare at him.
“Rude.”
He shrugs and slings an arm over my shoulders, hugging me to him. “Tell me something I don’t know.”
I relax against his hold and attempt to remain calm. I’ve been following these boys around alongside Oscar for as long as I can remember. The fact that they’re finally letting me hang out with them makes me happy—even if they are having fun at my expense.
“I used to think this house was a castle,” I tell him. My body is starting to feel loose. Free even. “Your dad is the beast of the castle.” I start to giggle, imaging Mr. Rojas big and furry like Beast from my favorite childhood movie.
Esteban chuckles as he takes another hit of the joint. His fingers are dragging up and down along my arm, making me feel tingly. “What am I then, princess?”
Moans start coming from the other side of the room, and I drift my gaze over to where Duvan has his hand under the woman’s skirt. She rocks against him as if she’s enjoying it. It makes me wonder exactly what he’s doing under there.
I look up at Esteban. His eyes have turned nearly black and he looks completely chill. Nice even. I start to giggle again, which makes him grin. “You’re the snake in the garden.”
“Like from the Bible?” He smirks, and it reminds me of Oscar.
Where is that boy, anyway?
“Yep. And I’m not a princess, I’m the—”
“Angel?”
I snort and shake my head. “No, the queen.”
His brows scrunch together. “Queen, huh?”
“Queen of everything.”
“Is that right, Roja?”
“And I’m going to rule the world one day.”
He inspects me with a narrowed gaze and passes me the joint. This time, I don’t choke. It sucks that Oscar isn’t around. It’d be even more fun with him here.
“I’m sleepy.”
“Sleep then.”
I drag my eyelids open but they feel heavy. I’m not sure why I’m so out of it. My thoughts linger in the past. I can almost smell the weed. Curling against Esteban, I close my eyes again. That day when I’d smoked pot with him, I’d woken up on the couch alone. When I sat up to try and figure out where I was, I realized that although I was fully dressed, my bra was gone.
“You took my bra off that day while I slept, didn’t you?” I question softly.
He chuckles, and it reminds me so much of that day. “I wanted it. And I take what I want.”