CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Luke shouldered his backpack and walked out of his last class of the day, shivering in the early February wind. It had been unusually warm that winter, so he hadn’t ever bothered pulling out his heavy coat. Now he was regretting that.
Stuart, a guy he had a few classes with, waved to him. “You want to study together tomorrow afternoon?”
Luke thought through his work schedule. “Yeah, I get off at two.”
“Cool. Text me.”
“I will.” He liked Stuart and his friend Dave. He’d gotten to know them fairly well over the last month, but he still hadn’t figured out if they were a couple or just indulging in a raging bromance. Either way, they were fun to hang out with. Maybe they could get dinner after their study session.
He tried to ignore the cold as he walked the mile and a half to his tiny apartment. He also refused to think about how his radiator heat had two settings: Off and Surface of the Sun. And of course, he couldn’t let his mind wander to memories of Jack. Damn, his list of things to ignore was growing way too long.
When he got home, he turned the radiator on. Maybe if he shut it off after a few minutes, he wouldn’t end up sweating for the rest of the day. He’d had a long-ass week. Two tests, a ton of tedious spreadsheet work, and several long shifts at the coffee shop. He wanted to flop down on the couch and turn on some mindless TV, but instead, he continued playing the role of responsible adult by gathering his laundry. The apartment had a stacked washer/dryer combo in the kitchen. It was one of the features that had sold him on it, even though the rent was slightly higher than a few other places he’d found. Not having to trek to a laundromat or be tempted to take his laundry back home was worth a lot.
He tossed in a load and turned the machine on. Then he contemplated what he was going to have for dinner. What he wanted was his mama’s cooking, but except for the time he’d spent home at Christmas, he’d forced himself to do his own or budget for takeout.
He was thinking about ordering a pizza when the washer made an odd rattling sound, then went silent. Luke double-checked the controls. He’d set it just like he always did. When he pressed Cancel, hoping he could reset the load, he heard the lock on the lid release. He was able to get the water to drain, but nothing he tried got the machine going again. It just kept flashing an error code.
Great. Now he was stuck with soaking wet, soapy clothes. So much for not having to go to a laundromat. How was he even going to get them there? They weighed a ton with all the water they’d soaked up, and his fucking truck needed a repair he couldn’t afford until payday.
You could call Jack.
God, that was tempting. Maybe Jack would come get him, take him back to Ames Bridge, and let Luke use his washing machine while he cooked him dinner. Luke twirled his phone as he tried to decide.
No. He’d made it on his own for more than two months. He’d see Jack in March at Cal and Beck’s wedding. He wasn’t going to give in. He could handle this.
Then he remembered that Yoshi, a guy who worked at Greene’s Java with him, lived in the same apartment complex. If he had a washer, he might let Luke borrow it in exchange for beer and pizza. Luke wouldn’t need a car to get the clothes across the parking lot. He could drag them that far.
He and Yoshi had never hung out outside work, but he enjoyed talking to him during slow times at the shop, and they had each other’s numbers in case they needed to find someone to cover a shift.
He sent a text. You home? My washing machine quit mid cycle. I’ll bring pizza and beer if I can use yours.
A few seconds later, he heard back. No problem. You need help carrying things over?
No thx. I can get it. What’s your apt number?
2D
Luke considered the layout of the buildings. He was fairly sure D would be on the bottom floor. He hoped so. He didn’t want to have to drag the heavy clothes upstairs. He grabbed a six-pack of beer from his fridge, balanced it on top of the clothes, which were now making puddles on the kitchen floor as they leaked through the sides of the laundry basket.
He hefted the basket, and water poured on him.
I should’ve called Jack.
He wrestled with the door and finally managed to open it, step outside, and lock it behind him.
I can do this.
By the time he’d gotten the last of the soggy laundry loaded into Yoshi’s washer, his arms ached, but at least his clothes wouldn’t mildew now.
“Thanks. I really appreciate it. Should I call for the pizza now?”
“Yeah. We could watch a movie. It’ll be a while before your laundry’s done, so you’re welcome to hang out here.”
“Sure. That would be great.”
Yoshi grinned. “I agree.”
Wait. Was Yoshi coming on to him? Neither of them had kept their interest in men secret. In fact, they often discussed a few of the extremely hot regulars at the shop, but Yoshi had never seemed interested in Luke, and it wasn’t like Luke had much experience with such things. Maybe he was just imagining it.
Luke would’ve guessed Yoshi’s tastes in movies leaned toward something slow and artsy, but after scrolling through Netflix while Luke ordered pizza, he suggested an action film.
Luke was always happy to watch car chases and explosions. He opened a beer for each of them and settled on the opposite end of the small couch, but as the movie progressed, Yoshi worked his way closer.
When he started to think Yoshi was going to make a move, Luke stood up and excused himself to the bathroom. He heard the doorbell ring as he reached the door. “Here.” He tossed his wallet to Yoshi. “I’ve got enough cash in there to pay for it.”
Luke returned a few minutes later. Yoshi had gotten each of them another beer and set the pizza box and a few napkins on the coffee table. They focused on eating for a while, but once they’d had their fill of pizza, they settled back against the couch, and Yoshi moved closer again.
Luke became mesmerized by a motorcycle chase, watching the characters zip in and out of traffic. Suddenly he felt Yoshi’s warm breath on his neck. He started to move away, but then Yoshi kissed him just below his ear, and it felt so nice to be touched again. He cupped Luke’s chin, turning him so their lips could meet.
Yoshi’s lips were warm and soft; he licked at the roof of Luke’s mouth, and damn, that felt good, but he wasn’t Jack. Luke might enjoy sex with him, but it wouldn’t be the pure magic Jack gave him. He wasn’t going to settle for less, and it would be unfair to Yoshi to screw him while thinking of someone else.
He pushed at Yoshi’s shoulders and pulled away.
“What’s the matter?”
“I… Back home, I…”
Yoshi rolled his eyes. “Who is he?”
Luke opened his mouth to speak but started to laugh instead.
“I’m getting worried here.”
Luke held up a hand. “No. It’s… I’m sorry. I like you, but there’s a man back home. We’re taking a break while I start school. I was about to say ‘it’s complicated.’ Then I thought how ridiculous that sounded and I…”
“Couldn’t stop laughing?”
“Yeah.”
Yoshi grabbed the remote and turned the TV off. “If I’m not going to get to make out with you, then at least tell me your juicy story.”
Luke smiled. “All right, but you asked for it.”
He told Yoshi about realizing Jack was interested in him—leaving out the part about the club or any kinky details about them. Then he explained his overprotective family as well as he could to someone who hadn’t seen them in action.
“Wow. That’s intense. What are they so worried about?”
Luke took a deep breath. He hadn’t told anyone he’d met there about his heart condition. His mom would have a fit if she knew. She’d say people needed to know in case something happened to him. Maybe this time she was actually right, but he didn’t want to be treated like an invalid.
“Promise you won’t treat me differently if I tell you?”
“Dude, I already know you’re hot for a man almost old enough to be your dad and that you like kinky shit. What else is there that might make me treat you differently?”
“Kinky shit?” Luke’s pulse sped up. “I never said anything to make you think—”
“You didn’t have to. The business card from the Edge said it for you.”
“Business card?” He was reduced to parroting.
Yoshi held up his hands. “It was right there in your wallet when you told me to grab the money for pizza. It’s not like I was snooping or anything.”
“Shit!”
“It’s fine. I don’t care what you and your old man get up to. I like a bit of kinky myself. So go ahead. Tell me your other dark secrets.”
Luke scowled at him. “Jack is not a dark secret.”
“No, but it’s fun to tease you.”
Luke flipped him off, and they both laughed. He was so thankful things still felt comfortable with Yoshi. He’d hate it if turning Yoshi down screwed up their friendship.
“All right. Here I go. My last dark secret.”
Yoshi leaned forward with exaggerated eagerness.
“I almost died right after I was born.”
“Whoa. I didn’t think it would be that dark.”
“It’s not. I’m fine now. I had a heart defect that required surgery. The doctors didn’t think I’d survive, but obviously they were wrong. I also survived a second and a third surgery, and I shouldn’t need any more. I have to take lots of meds, and I will never run a marathon, but I’ve worked on the family farm and—against my mother’s wishes—played sports in high school. I’m more healthy than a lot of people my age, but my mom still thinks of me as that sick, helpless baby, the child she almost lost. She’ll do anything to make sure I stay safe.”
“Wow. Yeah, I guess I kinda see why they’re like that, but still—”
“They take it way too far. That’s why I didn’t go to school when I was eighteen like I should have. My mom was worried about the stress, but I finally realized how much I needed to get away.”
Yoshi smiled. “I’m glad you did.”
“Me too. And if things were different…”
“Hey, no worries. If things ever change, though, let me know.”
They finished the movie, started another, and Luke ended up staying the night. On the couch.
***
Jack rolled over and reached for his phone. He’d set his alarm to wake him early so he could call Luke. He’d texted Lucy the day before to see if she knew Luke’s schedule. When she didn’t, he tried Cal and Beck. They knew Luke was working today, but not when. Beck suggested he call Greene’s Java and ask. He felt like a stalker, but they hadn’t spoken in two months, and now he had an excuse to call.
Sure, he was the one who insisted on the separation, but nothing he’d tried—taking on some new projects at the inn, spending more time with friends, visiting Lauren in New York—had kept him from thinking about Luke every day. He longed to hold Luke, to kiss him, to just hear his voice.
So Jack had called the coffee shop and found out Luke was opening at six thirty that morning. It was 5:45. Surely he’d be up now. He probably had to be at work at six.
The phone rang. Once. Twice.
“Jack?”
“Happy Birthday!”
“Wow. Um…thank you. I…I wasn’t expecting—”
“I couldn’t ignore your birthday.” Jack’s hands were sweaty. He’d never been this nervous talking to Luke, not even after he’d screwed up their second scene.
“How are you?” Luke asked.
Lonely. “Fine. Working a lot. This is the busiest winter I’ve ever had at the inn.”
“Oh. That’s…good.”
“Yeah.” Shit. This shouldn’t feel so awkward.
Just tell him how you really feel.
No, don’t put pressure on him.
“Do you have plans for today?” That was nice and neutral.
“Nothing big. I’ll see my family this weekend.”
Jack had heard. He didn’t want to think about Luke being right there across town all weekend long.
“And tonight I’m having a few friends over. We’re just going to have pizza and play some video games.”
Jack hated the jealousy that curled in his stomach, but he wanted to be with Luke on his birthday. He’d make him a cake and plan something… No. Luke was doing exactly what he needed to be doing.
“I’d rather be with you.” Luke’s voice was soft, sad, and it nearly broke Jack.
“Luke—”
“I know you don’t want me to say that, but—”
“You’re wrong. It’s exactly what I want you to say, but I don’t want you to feel obligated to say it.”
“I want to say it. I want you.”
Jack needed to end the call. “I’ll see you at Cal and Beck’s wedding.”
“How much of me do you want to see?”
“I think you know the answer, but our bargain still stands.”
Luke snorted. “Like it did at Christmas?”
“That was…”
“Incredible.”
Jack was too honest to disagree. “Yes, it was, but if anyone gets caught in the bathroom at the wedding, it’s going to be Cal and Beck.”
“They’ve already been caught in a barn. It’s someone else’s turn.”
“Not ours.” Being caught kissing at the cabin was bad enough.
“Shit.”
“What’s wrong?”
“I’ve got to leave for work or I’ll be late.”
“Enjoy your day.” Jack hoped he didn’t sound as desperate as he felt.
“Thank you for calling. I… Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” Jack said, but Luke had already hung up.