Nitro

It was late evening by the time we got back to the clubhouse, but I didn’t waste time once we arrived before I had Keys, the club’s secretary and resident tech guy, looking for info on Cindy. No way was I letting that girl slip through my fingers again. Not with how she fucking kissed me. I had no idea what the fuck was going on with her, or the real reason behind her leaving town when were in school, but I was certain it wasn’t because she didn’t want me―which is what I’d always thought had been the case.

“C’mon, man. Can’t you make all this shit work faster already?”

Keys raised an eyebrow at me as he continued to tap away at his laptop.

“If you want to have a go, I’ll happily leave you to it. I’d much rather be out there with my old lady than in here with your grumpy ass.”

That had me grimacing. Most of the club was out in the yard around the bonfire, enjoying themselves. I knew Keys didn’t have to be in here putting up with my bullshit.

“Fuck, I’m sorry, brother. It’s just, last night, I got this feeling she was being watched or chased or something, I want to fucking know what’s going on with her.” So I can fix it and bring her home with me where she belongs. I didn’t say that out loud, but I was fairly certain Keys knew I was thinking it. “How about I get out of your hair for a bit and go grab us a drink?”

Giving him a break from my shit, I left him to it for a few minutes while I went out to the bar to grab us both a drink. The clubhouse was in full night time mode with brothers and club whores all over the place. I should have been over at Styxx, checking that it was all running well, especially since I’d been out of town for the past five days, but when Scout had heard about what had happened with Cindy he’d told me he’d get the bar taken care of until I got shit sorted.

Not wanting to chat, I kept my head down, and managed to get the drinks and get back out of the main room fairly quickly. After I returned, I set Keys’ drink in front of him before taking a seat myself. Keys was a fucking genius on a computer and I had no doubt he’d get me the information I needed. I just wished he’d find it faster. Or that I could be more patient. But dammit, I’ve been waiting, what? Nineteen years for her. I was done waiting. And I had a feeling that whatever it was that had her so damn nervous was going to come for her sooner rather than later. I intended to be there when it did.

“Right, well, what I have so far on your Miss Cindy Davis is... she shares an apartment in Houston with another woman, Renee Stock. She works two part-time jobs, sales assistant at a small store called Retro Funk and bar-tending at a place called Titanium. She’s also into roller derby. She’s part of a team called Her Royal Hellions. Her roommate is also on the team. You should check out their site. They’re actually pretty good by the looks of it and your girl is all over their site in photos and clips.” He paused to take a drink, staring at me while he did. “If she means this much to you, why haven’t you gone looking for her before now? I mean, from what I’ve found she moved to Houston after she left Bridgewater at sixteen and stayed there.”

I shrugged at his query. “I did all I could to find her when she first left, but I was a fucking kid, man. Didn’t know the first thing about how to find someone who didn’t want to be found. Her parents had just been in a bad car wreck, her dad was seriously hurt. I forget what his injuries were exactly, but he was in hospital for a long damn time. Her mom didn’t get as badly hurt, but she’d still been injured and between recovering herself and trying to help her husband, she was too busy to have time for a lovesick teenage boy looking for their daughter. Especially considering she knew Cin broke up with me before she left. Then, when I came back from the Navy, it had been over ten years. I figured she’d be long gone, settled down somewhere with a husband and two-point-five kids. But that’s not the fucking case. That girl was scared of something. Like petrified, and that’s got me wondering about what really happened all those years ago. Because it wasn’t like we had a fight or anything. One day my world was sunshine and roses, the next it had gone to hell. No warning.”

Keys leaned forward, holding my gaze with his own. “I can get you all the facts and figures you want, but I doubt the internet is gonna tell me the answers you need. Why don’t you go see her parents now?”

I shook my head before I finished off my drink. “They moved while I was deployed. No fucking clue where they are anymore.”

He scribbled something down on a piece of paper. “Well, here’s the addresses for Cindy’s apartment and the shop where she works. She normally works Tuesdays, so how about a few of the boys and I come with you for a ride up to Houston tomorrow and you can see about getting her to agree to lunch or something. Word’s already spread about how she ran out of that fucking bar in Austin. Bulldog thinks like you do about her being scared. So I’d recommend starting off gentle with her, and stick to public settings. Until you know the lay of the land, so to speak.”

Scrubbing a palm over the back of my neck, I reached out with my other hand and took the note. “Yeah. I know I need to go slow with her. But it’s gonna fucking kill me to be so close to her and not have her.”

He started shutting down his laptop. “The right woman will do that to a man, brother. The whole club has your back on this. Whatever it ends up being after her, we’ll deal with it.”

With a nod I stood and we both headed out to the main room. I headed straight for the bar for another drink, but before I could make it I had one of the club whores in my face looking for some attention. With a shake of my head I moved past her, but I didn’t make it far before I had another one in my face telling me she could improve my mood. After dealing with her, I decided that a drink just wasn’t worth the trouble, so I turned to head toward the stairs. It was probably a better idea for me to get a good night’s sleep before tomorrow, anyhow. Because tomorrow I would find a way to get Cindy to fucking tell me what the hell was biting at her heels that had her looking so fucking scared in Austin.

Cindy

I loved Tuesday mornings at Retro Funk. The shop was always quiet this early, so my aunt would hide away in the back after telling me what I should do. Like I didn’t know after working here for the past nineteen years. Within the first week of moving in with Grandma, I’d started to come with her into the store to help out. While I’d still been in school, I came in on the afternoons and weekends, then when I finished up high school, I’d decided against heading off to college. I loved this store and Houston. I hadn’t wanted to leave and hadn’t seen the point. Not when I had a job I loved in a shop I adored.

Retro Funk had been my grandma’s pride and joy. She’d carefully selected every piece of stock she had. From the clothes to the trinkets, it was all a reflection of her heart. And mine. Once I moved in and she saw how much I loved all the retro pin-up stuff, she started getting more of it in. Everyone who lived anywhere near the store knew us both on sight, I was always dressed up like a funky 1950s chick, while Grandma had been a hippy. Until the day she died Grandma had worn her flowing skirts and beads in her hair. I rubbed over the ache in my heart that happened whenever I thought of Grandma. We were kindred spirits and I missed her terribly.

She’d always been so accepting of everyone, no matter who they were. Even knowing that, it had still surprised me at first when she didn’t bat an eyelash at me suddenly deciding to move in with her. I never could bring myself to tell her about the threats I’d been getting. My parents and even the cops didn’t take them seriously, I wouldn’t have been able to handle my grandmother saying the same thing. I’m sure she realized something was going on, but she never asked me about it. Nope, she just opened her arms wide and welcomed me home.

I blinked away the tears that pricked my eyes. I missed her so much. She’d been gone for twelve years now, but time didn’t lessen the pain of my grief. Losing Grandma had hit me hard, and before I could even really begin to process it, certain family members decided it was best to sell Grandma’s house as quickly as possible, leaving me homeless. To top that off, I got informed that her will revealed that, despite the fact I’d worked alongside Grandma six days a week since I’d finished high school and she knew I loved the store, she hadn’t left it to me. Mom tried to explain to me that it was because Grandma loved me and wanted me to live my life and follow my dreams, not get stuck living hers. When Mom had seen how upset over it I was, she’d managed to convince my other aunt and uncles that Grandma would have wanted me to have the option to work in the store as long as I wanted to.

Honestly, I didn’t fully understand how that side of it all worked, whether my Aunt Skye signed some kind of contract when she took over Retro Funk or what. I’d asked her more than once, but she always refused to answer. Clearly, it meant my aunt couldn’t fire me. Unfortunately, it hadn’t stopped her from cutting my hours back. At a guess, she wanted me to quit and just leave her to it, but I refused. Even if I only got one and a half days a week, I was going to make the most of it, spending every moment I could in this place that reminded me of Grandma.

I’d been twenty-four years old when all that had happened. I’d been on Her Royal Hellions derby team for a couple years by then and thankfully, they’d already fully accepted me into their little derby family. I was still grateful for that when I’d gone to them feeling completely devastated about the turn my life had just taken. That I’d suddenly found myself with a double dilemma, I’d needed somewhere to live and another job. The girls had jumped to help me out. Renee offered me the spare room in her apartment, where I still lived, and they told me about Titanium for the first time.

Before that day, I’d heard the girls mention the club’s name on occasion, but I’d had no clue what type of club it was or what went on there. I’d been so excited to seemingly have all my problems solved at once, I honestly didn’t give a damn what type of club it was! Natalie, who had already been our team captain even back then, owned Titanium, and she’d mentioned she needed a reliable bartender at the club. Before she’d take my answer on the job offer, she’d told me I had to come with her for a private tour. I hadn’t realized until later that I’d been basically the only Hellion who wasn’t a member. I’d also had no clue what BDSM was. Not only had I not had sex since leaving Johnny, but I hadn’t had any intimacy at all. I couldn’t risk it and my stalker seeing. Not after the damage to my car after that one date when all we did was have a quick kiss at the end of the night. I shuddered to think what he’d do if I tried anything like that again. The note he’d left had been very clear things would escalate if I continued to defy him.

As requested, I’d gone in after hours with Natalie and she’d walked me around the entire club and answered all my questions. She’d told me that as an employee, I would also be a member and I was welcome to play in the club whenever I wasn’t working. But there was no pressure―if I wanted to stay behind the bar and never play, that was fine too. It would be completely up to me. I’d told her I was simply happy to have a job, and I’d kept my ass planted firmly behind the bar all these years, even though I often got asked to scene with various Doms. After so many years, I’d heard all sorts of rumors about why I didn’t date or scene at all.

Aunt Skye clearing her throat pulled me from my trip down memory lane. Shaking my head, I turned to face her and my mind spun while my blood froze in my veins, forcing me to grip the counter for balance. Because she wasn’t alone. Nope, he’d tracked me down. Dammit. Johnny was standing beside Aunt Skye, looking at me with an indulgent look in his gaze, like he’d known my mind had been wandering. My aunt’s expression wasn’t nearly as nice. She looked peeved off that I’d been lost in thought. Nothing unusual there.

“This young man is here to see you, Cindy. Why don’t you take your lunch break early?”

Yeah, because heaven forbid I talk on the job. Aunt Skye was nothing like my grandmother, and it made me miss her all the more. Forgetting about my stalker for the moment, and needing to get away from my aunt and her bullshit for a while, I readily agreed and headed out the door with Johnny by my side.

“Well, that was a lot easier than I thought it would be.”

“Don’t get too excited. You caught me when I really needed a break, and this has to look like we’re just friends catching up. So don’t try any funny business. I can’t risk it.”

He chuckled and reached for my hand as if I’d not said a word. With a growl I pulled mine out of his reach. “I’m serious, Johnny. You can’t do shit like that, it’s dangerous.”

He stayed silent as we walked further up the street. Without touching me, he indicated I go ahead of him into a small cafe. Once inside, I followed him as he made his way to an empty table against the back wall. As I moved between the tables, I noticed that there were a few other men wearing the same vest as Johnny, sitting at the tables around the one he chose for us. There seemed to be Charons everywhere in here and it had me nervous. What the fuck was he playing at?

“What the hell is going on, Johnny? What is this?”

What was he planning? Was he going to snatch me and take me away or something? I tried to back away but he reached over and shackled my wrist in his hand and pulled me closer to him.

“No one calls me Johnny anymore, I go by Nitro now. And relax, I’m not trying to pull shit with you here. With how you acted in Austin, I figured you might be in some sort of trouble. That, together with what you said to me when we walked out of your shop confirms my suspicions. I came to find you today to get you to tell me what’s going on so I can fix it. My club brothers came with me to make sure you stay safe while that happens, nothing more. I promise.”

That had my stomach twisted into tight knots. I didn’t want to tell him anything. As much as I hoped he’d be like Natalie and believe me, what if he wasn’t? I wasn’t sure I could handle seeing a look of rejection in his eyes. I needed to get out of here, away from him before I caved. I’d been lonely for so long now, I knew deep inside it wouldn’t take much for him to get under my skin again, to have me telling him, giving him, everything he asked for. I tried to twist my wrist free from his tight grip, but he wouldn’t budge. His hand tightened on me, not enough to hurt but enough to make it clear I wasn’t going anywhere until he decided to let me go.

“Stop trying to run off, babe. Just sit down with me and we’ll have lunch. That’s all I’m asking for.”

No it wasn’t. He was asking for more so much more. He wanted my secrets. So he can protect you. My subconscious had always been Team Johnny. Maybe I could give him just a little of the truth and see how he reacted. If he looked like he was going to be like my mom, I’d stop talking and walk out of here. I was sure if I started to cause enough of a scene, he’d let me go. Because if he did follow my Mom’s lead, I didn’t want him back in my life. But if he was instead like Natalie, it might be nice to have someone like him in my corner for once. Maybe, just maybe, it was time for me to take a risk and attempt to start living my life again.