Chapter One
Toby
Toby, I won’t be coming over tonight. I’m sorry, but this isn’t working. It’s not you, it’s me.
I stared at the lines on my phone, reading them over and over again. After nearly nine months of dating, my boyfriend…—ex-boyfriend—Casper didn’t even have the guts to tell me to my face that he was done? He took the easiest way out and freaking texted me?
That sucked. And it hurt.
I sat down heavily on my bed. I’d just finished getting ready for a night at a club with Casper, even though I didn’t like clubbing that much. I usually just went with Casper since he enjoyed dancing. Well, at least I didn’t have to spend another night fighting off guys who wanted to get too close to Casper—since he usually flirted with everyone on the dance floor…and off it. I, on the other hand, enjoyed having a quiet evening at home, watching TV, maybe even going to dinner, but not clubbing.
I read the lines again, torn between hurt and relief. No, Casper hadn’t been my true love, if something like that existed, but we’d been good together. We’d enjoyed each other’s company, and the sex had been good. But I’d always missed something, and the sinking feeling that Casper had felt the same snuck up on me. Why else would he end this relationship?
With a deep sigh, I looked for the number of my best friend, Jason. Usually, we were inseparable, but ever since I’d started dating Casper, we’d drifted apart. Well, it was probably a shitty move to call him now, as soon as I got dumped, but I needed to talk to someone, and Jason would understand. At least, I hoped he would. Getting told to get lost a second time today would probably destroy me.
I dialed Jason’s number and tapped my fingers on the sheet while I waited for him to pick up. The tone sounded loud in my ear, and finally, after a while, Jason answered. “What’s up?”
“I…um, would you like to meet up?”
“So who dumped whom?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Come on, you always call when you split up. After the fourth or fifth time, it’s not that hard to figure it out.”
I ran a hand through my hair. Was I that easy to see through? I’d contacted Jason a few times in the last couple months, but he might be right. It was either when Casper and I had fought or when I was bored because Casper didn’t have time for me. Yep, I basically had been an asshole toward my best friend. Great.
“Listen, I’m sorry. Really. I didn’t mean to…” Well, what could I say?
I didn’t mean to use you only when my boyfriend dropped me? I didn’t mean to be an ass? Yeah, sounded awesome. I finished with a pretty lame, “I’m really sorry,” because I couldn’t say more.
“It’s okay, I guess. So, Casper dumped you? Or did you fight?” Jason sounded wary.
“I… He texted me and told me it’s over.”
“Figures. He didn’t have much of a backbone to begin with.”
I hadn’t dated him because of his backbone, to be honest, but that was something I wouldn’t discuss with my best friend. Nope.
“Well, it’s over now, and I definitely could do with some drinking. Or watching a movie if you want.”
“Yeah, I’ll be there in an hour. We can check the movies on Netflix. I’ll bring pizza.”
“Thank you. You’re truly the best.”
“Don’t mention it.”
Jason was the best, even though he didn’t want to hear it. After all, he came in to save the day, no matter what his plans for the evening were or how I had behaved. If that didn’t speak of friendship, then what did?
***
More than two hours later and halfway through some absolutely terrible action movie, I leaned back on the couch and took another sip of the beer Jason had brought. The pizza had been as delicious as ever, the beer tasted good, as well, and I was finally relaxed enough to laugh about the badly animated car chases.
The way I’d been dumped still stung a little, but since I hadn’t been in love with Casper, it actually wasn’t that bad. Now, if I could find out why all the guys left me, I’d be a pretty happy camper. Or I would be if I managed to keep one of said guys.
Not today, though. Today, or rather, tonight, I’d hang out with Jason, drink my beer, and then later, I’d crawl into my bed and try to forget about my asshole ex-boyfriend.
After yet another hilarious car chase, Jason suddenly turned the volume of the TV down and looked at me, a serious expression on his face. “Have you ever thought about going to an agency? To maybe help you find someone who’s not just going to use you?”
“I…what? What agency?”
“There’s one I know of. I signed up myself a while ago. So far, they haven’t found a true mate for me, but at least it’s a chance.”
“True mate? You think there is one true match out there for me?”
“Yes, of course. We all have one.”
“I know. I just… I have no idea anymore.”
“If you meet the one, he’ll stay. And he’ll love you the way you deserve.” Jason’s face was soft.
I smiled, even though it felt wrong. If only I could believe in love. I couldn’t even manage to have a boyfriend I didn’t love. How the hell was I supposed to find and keep one who loved me?
“I know there’s someone out there, looking for you. Wouldn’t it be great to be loved? To finally have someone who doesn’t dump you because he finds a better piece of ass?”
I flinched. Was that the cause? Because I usually bottomed? What if the guys wanted more? What if that was the reason? “I’m… I don’t believe in love anymore.”
“You don’t have to. But sign yourself up. I can go with you.”
“I’m not sure. I mean, what do they do? Do you think they’ll magically find someone for me?” Also, what if they couldn’t find someone who wanted me? What if they found someone, and he left me too? No. I’d rather stay alone.
“I think so, yes. Isn’t your cat anxious to find someone? I mean, mine constantly wants to meet his mate.”
“He wants a mate? I don’t know. Uh, Casper was human… Obviously, I never told him. We… I just didn’t shift at all when we were together.”
“What? You know that’s not healthy for you or your cat.” Jason stared at me, his eyes wide.
I ran a hand through my short hair.
“Oh, wait. Yes. Asshole. I understand.”
As usual, Jason was right on the spot. Casper hadn’t liked any kind of animal. His current boyfriend being a bobcat shifter wouldn’t have gone over well. Besides, it was forbidden to reveal our presence to humans, so dating a human was stupid to begin with.
“Okay, let’s go. We need to go for a run. And tomorrow, you’re going to sign up for that agency, whether you want to or not. I love you dearly, but I won’t speak to you again if you don’t do that for yourself. It’s high time you start thinking about yourself.” Jason’s tone was grim and didn’t leave much room for discussion. Or none, to be honest.
That didn’t stop me from trying, though. “A run? Now?”
“Yep. Now. It’s time you get in touch with your cat, and it will stop you from pining after the asshole. Besides, I want to run, so you’re coming with me.”
“I don’t—”
“You do. Come on.”
I sighed deeply and stood. The easiest way to handle Jason was usually just to do as he wanted. And maybe it would help chase away the lingering thoughts of Casper.
Afterward, I’d worry about this agency nonsense. I’d probably just go through with it. If it silenced Jason, then I would do it. I didn’t believe it would help me find someone, but I wanted to keep my best friend.
But first, we’d go for a run. Jason waited by the door of my small apartment, keys in hand, looking eager and annoyed at the same time. I better get going…right now.