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Trying To Live With The Dead (The Veil Diaries Book 1) by B.L. Brunnemer (5)

Chapter 5

Before heading to the library, I stopped at a gas station for a big bottle of water and a couple of those tissue packs. I needed to stop using Asher’s tissues. I made sure to text Rory telling him where I would be.

The county library wasn’t a huge library, but it looked big to me. The building’s outside walls were made of river stone, and near the entrance was a sign that said, ‘no climbing.’ It made me grin.

I walked into the big room, noticing that there were comfy armchairs here and there, scattered into corners, creating reading nooks. It didn’t really look like a library. If it weren’t for the bookshelves, it would look like a coffee house. It was big and cozy all at the same time.

I spotted the guys at one of the bigger tables and headed over. Isaac sat at one end of the table, Ethan and Miles sat on one side, Zeke on the other. I sat across from Miles next to Zeke and started pulling out my books.

“Heard you got another nosebleed today,” Zeke announced in his gravelly voice. I narrowed my eyes at him. “Asher said it’s some kind of medical thing.” He looked over at me, his eyes demanding answers.

“You guys gossip just as much as girls do,” I shot back as I opened my World Civ notes to study. Isaac and Ethan chuckled. Miles adjusted his glasses and ran his eyes over me. Before he could ask me any questions, I changed the subject. “How is it you guys can stay out late on school nights?”

They all looked at each other for a second before looking back down at their books.

“Asher’s dad is usually out of town on business,” Miles began, his fingers tapping out a staccato rhythm again. “Right now, my mother is on a redecorating spree, so, she doesn’t want me in the way.” He shrugged, all but burying his nose in his textbook. That didn’t seem right to me, but before I could even think to ask, Ethan spoke up.

“We can’t do anything we want, our mom’s a teacher at the grade school, and she’s usually stuck grading papers after school. We always have to check in, but she knows our friends and knows that we’re not interested in doing anything too stupid.” Isaac nodded in agreement. They didn’t mention their dad, and I decided not to ask.

“My Aunt Sylvia works nights at the diner in town.” Zeke shrugged as he turned a page in his Physics book “As long as I check in and stay out of trouble she pretty much lets me do what I want.”

Everyone was avoiding looking at me. That’s when I understood --they didn’t usually have anyone at home most of the time. They stayed together all evening to keep each other company. The wall I kept around my heart cracked a little more. Shit.

“Feel free to come over anytime, guys,” I said, keeping my voice light. “It’ll annoy the crap out of Tara.” Chuckles ran around the table.

We all got to work studying. I focused on my World Civ. for the first hour. I had moved on to Chemistry when I noticed Ethan shifting out of the corner of my eye, wincing. I looked up from my book and watched him trying to stretch his lower back while staying in his chair.

“Ethan, are you okay?” I asked.

He was still grimacing when he answered.

“Yeah, I just...” He closed his eyes, grunting in pain.

Isaac’s head snapped up, his face serious. He ran his eyes over his brother like he was examining him.

“It’s just an old back injury,” Ethan said. He looked down at his bag on the floor and scowled at it. He closed his eyes and sighed, sounding resigned. “Brother, could you-”

He didn’t even have to finish his sentence. Isaac reached down, picked up Ethan’s bag and put it on the table for him.

“Thanks.” Ethan opened a pocket on his bag and pulled out a water bottle followed by a prescription bottle. He poured out one large white pill, then swallowed it quickly. “Oh, Ibuprofen, how I love you,” he grumbled as he put the bottle back into his bag. He pushed his bag into the middle of the table.

What did he do to his back? For once, I wasn’t going to ask; Ethan didn’t seem okay with the situation. He went back to his homework. I went back to my chemistry.

“Muscle spasms?” Isaac asked quietly.

“It’s fine.” Ethan all but growled at his brother.

“You’re not going to training tonight.” Isaac’s voice was firm. It was strange coming from Isaac.

“It’ll be fine,” Ethan hissed at his brother. “I just forgot to take my noon pill.” Isaac dropped it.

It was a while later when Asher showed up, freshly showered. He dropped into the chair at the end to my right.

“How did practice go?” I asked, opening my math book.

“Fine, coach was angry I skipped yesterday,” Asher informed us as he pulled one of his books out. “He made me run more suicides as punishment, and it wiped me out. What did I miss?”

“Oh, nothing much. The guys were just telling me all your most embarrassing secrets,” I told him, my voice sincere.

His head shot up, looking around the group with wide eyes. The other guys snickered. Asher narrowed his eyes at me playfully

“They wouldn’t, I have too much dirt on them,” he assured me before he opened his book.

“Okay, you and me, we need to talk soon,” I told him earnestly. Asher smiled then everyone got back to work.

A half hour later, I was in the middle of my Algebra homework when I felt it. That damn chill down my neck. I lifted my head slowly and looked around. There was a dead woman walking down an aisle of books, looking at them sadly. I could almost see the waves of distress rolling off her. I didn’t want to help her. But as she came closer, I felt her emotions running through her. Grief, loss, and confusion poured over me. She didn’t know she was dead. My head started to ache. I couldn’t not help her.

Fuck.

I put my pen down and made a show of stretching my arms.

“I’m going to stretch my legs, maybe find a book to take home,” I told the guys as I got out of my chair. No one asked questions as I moved off into the shelves. The closer I got to her the more my head throbbed. I was guessing she died from head trauma. I met her halfway down an aisle.

“I see you,” I whispered to her.

She turned to me, relief sweeping over her face.

“Thank goodness,” she said, her eyes running over the shelves. “No one seems to be listening to me.”

The pain in my head spiked, making my stomach roll. I gestured further into the stacks and stepped around her. I stuck my hand out as the world spun. I blinked hard and focused on getting further out of sight. When I found a corner, I took a step back from her and the world stopped spinning. Definitely head trauma.

I looked up at the woman; she seemed sweet. She looked like she was in her thirties when she died. Her brown hair up in a messy bun held together with pencils. She wore a long, dark, tweed skirt, and a blue cable knit sweater with a white blouse on underneath. The peter pan collar showing over the sweater.

“What’s your name? Who are you?” I asked as my head began to throb with my pulse. She licked her lips before answering.

“I’m Lily Mason. I’m the librarian here, but no one seems to be listening to me,” she told me before pointing at a section of books. “Non-fiction isn’t supposed to be back here, it’s supposed to be on the east wall. And...” She began listing off the changes that had occurred since her death. She really had no idea she was dead. Fuck.

I sat down in an armchair and pulled the tissues from my pocket.

“Tell me about yourself,” I asked, my head already throbbing.

Lilly Mason told me everything. She told me about her love for books, how she wanted nothing more than to sit and read for hours uninterrupted. She told me about her dreams of making this library the best in the area. That was all she wanted, she didn’t care if she had a family or kids. Just her books.

I listened to her for as long as I could. My head felt like it was raw, all her memories were pouring in. I had been holding tissues to my nose for 15 minutes when I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Lilly, honey, you’re dead,” I told her in a nasally voice. She looked surprised, and then quickly shook her head.

“No, I’m not, I’m here trying to get things done,” she insisted.

I resisted the urge to groan, my stomach was rolling, I didn’t have much time left. I pointed to a book someone had left on a table.

“Grab that book,” I ordered. The pain wasn’t with my pulse anymore; it was constant.

Lilly went to the table and tried to pick up the book. Her hand passed right through it. She looked up at me stunned. My heart ached for her, but I was running out of time here.

“Your body is gone, honey, but you don’t have to be stuck here.” She looked like she was going to cry. My stomach rolled. Ugh, I was going to need a trash bag. “Lilly.” I got her attention, tears were falling down her face. “I don’t know what’s in the next part, but everyone I’ve ever seen cross had a look of pure joy on their face,” I explained. I had to close my eyes as the world spun.

“Really?” Lilly’s voice shook with uncertainty.

Oh, please God, crossover, please. I swallowed hard as I opened my eyes and met hers. I felt more blood began pouring from my nose; I grabbed more tissue trying to save my sweater.

“Really,” I told her, my voice muffled behind my hand. “If there is a heaven, Lilly, wouldn’t yours be better than this? With books you could actually read, touch, and smell?”

She nodded, her eyes eager. “How?” she asked.

My head spiked, my vision fading for a moment.

“Just let go of this world,” I explained, my voice soft and muffled. “You’re the one keeping yourself here.”

She nodded before looking around the library one more time. Tears were still falling down her cheeks as she started to disappear.

“Thank you,” she whispered just before she was gone.

As soon as she finished fading away, I ran. I didn’t have time to walk. I ran through the isles, my stomach already rebelling. Not yet, not yet, not yet. I ran into the alcove with the bathroom doors, barely noticing that the guys spotted me diving through the door. I ran to the closest stall, dropped to my knees and threw up. I was sick over and over. Blood streaming into the bowl from my nose, eyes streaming with tears. My head exploding. The world spun as I tried to breathe between bouts of sickness. Finally, I had nothing left. I held my hair back in one hand and fumbled for the toilet paper with the other.

When I was sure I wasn’t throwing up again, I flushed the toilet and sat back on my butt, my back against the stall wall. I held more tissue to my nose and used my other hand to clean up my face. I felt weak, drained, and wobbly. So, I just sat there focusing on breathing as my stomach stopped cramping. I had to keep changing out my tissues; my nose didn’t want to stop bleeding. I was there a long time.

When my nose finally stopped bleeding, I threw the bloody tissues into the toilet and slowly got to my feet. I went to the sink, washed my hands and looked in the mirror. My already pale skin looked even whiter, my skin clammy. Dry blood had crusted around my mouth and chin. A few drops stained my sweater. Great. Feeling shaky, I washed my face and used the paper towels to dry. I felt weak, like one breeze would knock me over. I knew I needed to go home. What was I going to tell the guys? Food poisoning would work, right? People get food poisoning all the time. Right?

I took a shaky breath and headed back out into the library. I felt the guy's eyes on me instantly. I walked with my eyes on the floor, the shelves--anywhere but at them. When I reached the table, they didn’t waste time.

“Red, you look like shit,” Isaac informed me.

“You okay, Beautiful?” Ethan sounded worried.

“What happened?” Zeke demanded.

“Are you feeling alright?” Miles asked gently.

“Did you have another nosebleed?” Asher asked directly.

I shook my head as I started packing up.

“Nah, I’m fine, I must have got a bad burrito at the quick stop,” I told them, keeping my voice impassive, though I couldn’t even look at them when I said it. “I’m not feeling well, so I’m going to head home.” I took my jacket off the back of my chair and pulled it on, swallowing against another wave of nausea. They were watching me like hawks. Miles' face was suspicious as his gaze ran over me.

“I can drive you home, Red.” Isaac offered, already getting out of his chair. Ethan was nodding in agreement. I waved for him to sit back down.

“No, it’s fine, you have training tonight. Besides, I’ll probably be fine now after puking my guts out.” I picked up my bag before anyone else could offer to drive me. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” I turned and walked away. I was only a few feet away when I heard them talking.

“Did anyone else notice the blood on her sweater?” Miles asked, his voice quiet. The others say they did. How much longer was I going to be able to hide this?

When I got back to the house, I never even made it upstairs, I reached the couch and dropped.

In what felt like a second later, Rory was shaking me awake. Ugh, nooo.

“Huh?” I asked, sitting up still half asleep. Rory’s hands grabbed my face and forced me to look at him. He was trying to open one of my eyelids when I finally woke up. “I’m fine! I’m fine!” I snapped at him. My head throbbed, and my stomach churned with the motion. It was a heartbeat before his hands let go of my face. I blinked my eyes open; the living room was dark except for one lamp.

“What happened?” Rory demanded his face hard. “Tara’s upstairs swearing you came home drunk and passed out on the couch.”

I snorted and immediately regretted it. My face ached. I lay back down with my eyes open so Rory wouldn’t freak out again.

“I ran into that girl ghost again today, she was being a real bitch, too,” I told him, rubbing the bridge of my nose. “Then we all went to the library, and I ran into a dead woman there.” I groaned as I sat back up putting my feet on the floor. “I helped her move on, got a really bad bloody nose and got sick.”

Rory turned until he was sitting normally on the couch next to me.

“How did you cover for that?” he asked.

I smiled painfully. “I told them I ate a bad burrito from the quick mart.” Rory snorted at that. “Asher was asking about the bloody noses today, I told him it’s a medical condition that crops up now and then.”

“You think that was a good idea?” His voice was full of doubt.

I rubbed my fingers against my forehead trying to ease the pain.

“It’s better than the truth,” I told him honestly. “This way they’ll at least hang around a while longer.”

“Lexie,” Rory began in his lecturing voice, but before he could get started, there was a knock on the door. Rory frowned at me before he got up and answered it.

“I bring chicken soup!”

My head snapped up so fast I got dizzy. Ethan was standing in the doorway. A big plastic tub in his hands with DVD cases on top. “And movies with minimal gore,”

Rory grinned and gestured for him to come in. Ethan tossed the movies to me and then headed into the kitchen

“What are you doing here?” I had never been more surprised in my life. Ethan started banging some pots and pans in the kitchen.

“Beautiful is sick, we make Beautiful better,” he told me, his smooth voice calling from the kitchen.

Rory was still smirking when I looked over at him not knowing what to do. “It’s what friends do Lexie,” he said gently.

I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact Ethan was here.

“What about training?” I asked.

Ethan came back over and held out the videos for me to pick one. “Isaac said he could spar with one of the other fighters tonight.” He shook the videos in front of me to get me to pick. I picked a superhero movie.

As he went to put the movie on there was another knock on the door. Rory’s brow furrowed as he got up and answered it. Miles was standing there with a plastic bag in his hand. His ears grew pink as he held it up.

“I brought some medicine that might help Alexis feel better,” Miles offered uncertainly. Rory smiled a big smile and gestured for him to come in. Miles made a beeline for me; he sat down to my right and dug into the bag. “Are you still nauseous?” he asked, pulling out a white box, which he started to open.

“Um, a little, just when I move too fast,” I told him, still in shock to see them. Miles pulled out a round tablet still in its wrapper. He handed it to me.

“Chew that, it’ll stop the nausea,” Miles ordered.

Miles ordered me!

Still in shock, I opened it and chewed it. It tasted like cherries. I was still looking at them like they were from another planet when there was another knock on the door. Rory started chuckling as he got up again to answer. Asher was there with a big plastic bag in his hand. I only saw him walk in because Miles was asking if I had any other symptoms.

“A headache, body ache,” I answered bewildered. Miles pulled out a bottle of painkillers and began to open it. That’s when a big, fluffy, emerald green blanket landed in my lap. Asher dropped down next to me. I looked at him confused, and lifted up an edge of the blanket. He shrugged.

“When my sister is sick, she uses a big, fuzzy blanket.” Asher gestured at my blanket-covered lap. “So, you get a big, fuzzy blanket.”

My mouth dropped open to say something, but nothing came out. I was still trying to grasp this. The guys were here? There was another knock on the door while I was still looking like a stranded fish. Rory was laughing as he leaned his head back.

“Come on in,” Rory shouted, enjoying himself way too much. I turned to see Zeke closing the door behind him a couple grocery bags in his hands. He opened them and began listing what he brought absently.

“I’ve brought different kinds of clear sodas and some crackers.” He didn’t even bother to look at me he just headed into the kitchen area. Ethan turned and spotted Asher.

“Spot stealer,” Ethan accused before heading back toward the kitchen. Asher just smiled at him. I finally found my voice.

“What are you guys doing here?” I all but shouted; I was really out of my depth here. They were really here.

“It’s what we do when one of us is sick,” Ethan called from the kitchen.

“We show up and bring you things to make you feel better.” Miles said, adjusting his glasses.

“We bring movies and blankets to keep the sick one on the couch, and if it’s Zeke, we all sit on him to keep him there,” Asher added, like this was perfectly normal behavior.

“I heard that,” Zeke shot back from the kitchen.

“We bring Mom’s chicken noodle soup, which is the best thing in the world,” Ethan informed me as he came around the couch. He handed a bowl to me carefully which Asher took so that Miles could hand me the painkillers.

“And we keep you company,” Zeke announced as he stepped around the couch and handed me a glass of gold liquid.

I looked around at them all, completely and utterly dumbfounded. They came because I was sick, and they wanted to make me feel better? It was that simple for them. I felt a whole section of that wall around my heart crumble. Emotions tore through me as I looked at Rory speechless, tears filling my eyes. Rory just smiled understandingly at me. Tara saved me from embarrassing myself by coming downstairs.

“What’s with all the noise…?” Tara’s irritated voice trailed off.

I quickly took the Tylenol, using the soda to wash it down--more to give me a moment to compose myself than for the actual pain. Asher took my glass and handed me the bowl of soup. He was pointedly not looking up at the stairs where I assume Tara was standing.

“What is everyone doing here?” Tara asked, her voice suddenly becoming friendly.

“Beautiful is sick, so we’re here to smother her back to health,” Ethan declared before turning and sitting on the floor between Miles and me. Zeke took the armchair on the left. Ethan’s hand touched my shoe, then he looked down at my feet.

“You’re still wearing shoes?” Ethan groaned. I didn’t even get to answer. Ethan started taking my boots off. Ethan tossed them over to Zeke, who caught them and set them on the floor.

“We have a strict no-shoes-when-you're-sick rule,” Asher pointed out, stretching his arm across the back of the couch.

“I-I see that,” I stuttered, still in a daze.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Tara walk slowly to the bottom of the stairs.

“We also have a pajama policy,” Asher informed me, his gaze ran over my sweater coming back to my face. “But we’ll let you slide since it looks like you just came home and passed out.”

“I just got her up a minute before you boys started showing up,” Rory admitted smiling.

Asher nodded, then looked back at the television. Ethan hit the play button.

“Hey, I brought that big tub of soup from our house if anyone’s hungry.” Ethan waved his hand toward the kitchen.

“We ate at the diner after Lexie took off,” Asher admitted before looking down at me and frowning. “Eat your soup, woman.”

I gave him a small smile and started eating. It really was amazing chicken soup.

“In that case, I’m getting a bowl,” Rory announced as he got to his feet, Tara followed him to the kitchen.

I took a second to look around at them all. I was sick, they thought with food poisoning, so they came to keep me company and take care of me.

“You guys are pretty amazing, you know,” I told them honestly. I’m glad I kept my voice from cracking. Most of them shrugged, a couple waved a hand dismissively as they watched the start of the movie.

“We’re family, it’s what we do,” Miles told me absently. They really didn’t know just how incredible that was to me. I ate my soup, covered in my blanket, surrounded by people that actually seemed to care about me. It wasn’t long before I fell asleep again.

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