Asher came in from practice an hour later. He called from the front door that he needed a shower, and he’d be down in a bit. I finished my rough draft for my World Civ essay on my laptop and decided I wanted a snack. I got up and headed into the kitchen.

As I passed the living room, I noticed that Miles had rearranged the furniture. One leather couch faced the fireplace with the coffee table in front of it, and the other was just to the left of the coffee table. It looked nice.

I had just pulled down the chips from Zeke's hiding spot when Asher came in. His hair was still wet from the shower. He was wearing dark-gray sweatpants and a blue t-shirt. He looked up and went still. Then he smiled.

“Ally girl, why are you standing on the counter?” he asked, smiling.

I sat down on the counter and grinned wickedly. “Because Zeke hid the chips too high for me to reach. Or so he thought.”

Asher laughed as I opened the bag and ate a chip. I raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you in your jammies?” I asked before eating another chip.

Asher smiled as he dug in the pantry.

“Yes, I am. No point in getting dressed again when I’m just going to bed soon anyway,” he said, turning around with his hands full of ingredients.

I scooted over to the breakfast bar to give him more work room as I watched him collect some chicken and fresh veggies from the fridge. I sat cross-legged on the tiled counter and watched him working in the kitchen.

“What ya doing?” I asked in my cutesy voice. He smiled as he pulled out a cutting board with the word meat burned into it.

“I am cooking dinner for everyone.,” He went to the sink and washed his hands. “Do you want to help?”

“Sure.” I hopped down from the counter then gave him an appraising eye. “Do I need to be in my jammies?”

Asher chuckled. “Yes, this is a wearing jammies cooking night,” Asher declared before tilting his head toward the doorway. “Hurry and change.”

I hurried out the door then jogged down the hall. I went into the master bedroom and changed into my black flannel bottoms. A faded black Red Hot Chili Peppers shirt. I redid my messy bun and hurried back to the kitchen. Asher was cutting up the chicken, so I went to the sink and washed my hands.

“Okay, what do you want me to do?” I asked, drying my hands. Asher stopped cutting chicken and gestured me over near him. He pointed at a drawer.

“Open the drawer and take out the cutting board that says veggies on it,” he instructed, keeping his hands away from anything. I pulled out the cutting board. He seemed to think for a second, then went to wash his hands. “We’re making stir fry chicken, with a yellow curry sauce.” He quickly washed his hand and then was back beside me. He pulled out a smaller knife than he’d been using on the chicken. Then he grabbed the head of broccoli and put it on my cutting board.

“Normally I make the sauce myself, but I still have homework to do so we’re going with the jar kind tonight.” He grumbled as he set the knife on the cutting board. “Stir fry is all about the prep,” he began to explain.

I noticed that small light was back in his eyes.

“Stir-fry cooking is fast and at high heat. The pain is cutting everything up, especially for this many people.”

I nodded.

“Do you know how to cut up raw broccoli?” he asked.

I shook my head.

He smiled down at me before putting the broccoli back and grabbing a bunch of carrots. “Okay, let's start with knife cuts on the carrots.” That light in his eyes was getting bigger as he became more animated. “What you’re going to do is julienne cuts. This is how you do it.” He took an already washed carrot and cut it into large chunks about an inch long. He cut the sides off till it was a block of carrot. Then he made slices out of that block. He then stacked the slices and cut down the sides, creating little pieces of carrot. He did it so quickly it was obvious he’d done this a lot. “You got that, Ally?”

“Yeah, let me at those carrots.”

He chuckled as he handed me the knife, with him holding the blade. I took it carefully, not wanting to cut him. He stepped away and continued cutting the chicken.

I worked in silence while I got used to what I was doing, then I was able to talk and not cut myself. “So, you usually make yellow curry from scratch?”

“Yeah, it’s just so much better when you make it yourself. The flavor isn’t watered down, and you can add different things to change it as you go.”

I smiled to myself as Asher began talking about cooking. The recipes he loved and the ones that crashed and burned. Apparently, Asher was having trouble with a banana foster; he said he just sucked at desserts. I asked him questions about why you do this or that when cooking and he actually knew the answers. Over the next hour, he was animated, excited, and happy as he talked about food and cooking. It made my heart melt a little. He needed to be a chef, it’s what he loved. When we finished with the prep, I sat on the breakfast bar again and watched him cook. He impressed me. He put everything in a huge serving bowl and told me to grab mine before the guys came in as he headed out to tell the guys dinner was ready.

I had just finished dishing up my bowl when the others came in. I quickly got out of their way and headed back to the dining room.

I sat back down in my spot and took a bite. Oh, my god... that is soo good. Okay, Asher was a cooking God, and I needed to make him see that. I put it on my to-do list in the back of my head. Make Asher go to culinary school. There is no way I’d forget that.

Everyone else came in and sat down. Asher pulled his books out before he ate dinner.

“Asher, will you marry me?” I asked down the table, covering my mouth since I was talking with my mouth full. Everyone chuckled.

Those blue eyes flashed down the table at me.

“You just want me for my cooking,” he accused me, smiling. I swallowed my food and scoffed in mock outrage.

“No, you're my wonderful friend Asher,” I told him honestly. Then I mumbled. “Who could also cook like a god.”

Asher burst out laughing, his cheeks turning pink.

“I don’t think so, Ally girl.” He said shaking my head.

“Can’t blame a girl for trying,” I grumbled before taking another bite. The boys laughed at me. I didn’t care; I was stuffing myself on Asher’s cooking.

Everyone was still in the dining room an hour later. Asher had just finished his homework and was putting his books away when Zeke got to his feet.

“I’ve got to go to work,” Zeke grumbled as he headed out the door to the hallway. Everyone said bye. He waved without turning around then he was gone.

I couldn’t stall anymore. I had to go do those meditation exercises.

“Miles, is there anywhere in the house that is, well, peaceful?” I asked. Miles looked down the table at me. “I need to start those meditation exercises.”

He seemed to think about it, and he smiled.

“There is one place. Come on, I’ll show you.” He got to his feet, and I followed as he led me down the left side of the long hallway. I looked around as I followed; I’d never been past the dining room on this side of the house. He took me all the way to the end to a glass wall and door. Through the glass, I saw a lot of green plants. He opened the door, switched on the light and gestured for me to go first. I walked into a giant glass room filled with plants and the sound of flowing water.

“You have a conservatory?” I couldn’t believe it. Climbing plants covered some of the glass walls. Flowering vines covered every column. There was green everywhere, with flowers of every color imaginable tucked here and there.

“My mother is a botanist, or was before she stopped working. She still loves plants,” Miles explained as I walked further into the room.

I followed the path through the forest of plants. When I reached the center of the room, I found a round cement fountain in the center of the clearing with water streaming out of the mouths of three frogs into the blue-tiled basin. It was amazing. I was also pretty sure my mouth had dropped opened, so I made a point to close it.

“Wow,” I muttered; it was all I could manage. I looked up to see a curved glass ceiling, twenty feet above. I bet if you shut off the lights you’d be able to see the stars in here.

“I take it you like it?” he asked, his voice quiet again.

I nodded.

“I would rather have an observatory,” Miles admitted.

I pulled my eyes off the flowers to look at him.

“That would be pretty cool too,” I admitted before I went back to getting a closer look at the flowers on one of the columns. “But you’re talking to a girl who lived in a trailer for four years. Not to mention I kill every plant I ever get.” I decided not to touch any of the flowers just in case my luck was transferable.

“Good point,” Miles said. “Do you think this would work for trying to meditate?”

I nodded, my eyes still running over all the colors.

“If I can’t do it here, I’ll never be able too,” I admitted. I heard him blow air through his nose.

“Then I’ll leave you to it,” he said, walking back up the path.

“Thank you, Miles,” I called out before he got out of earshot.

“You’re welcome, Lexie.”

The door closed, and I was alone in the big beautiful room. I looked around and found a cushioned patio couch. I sat down and pulled out my cell phone. I looked up the directions on how to begin meditating to link to the Veil. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing. I tried to clear my mind, but things kept popping up. Memories of my mother, memories of getting jumped, the boys showing up after I woke up. Everything over the last week kept popping up into my head, distracting me. I tried to do what the instructions said and let the thought go to keep my mind clear. I was having a hard time with it. I sat there cross-legged on the couch and tried to clear my head.

This wasn’t working. I opened my eyes and sighed. I had been at it for almost two hours and I still couldn’t even get past step one. I got up and walked back into the house. I was trying to figure out what I was doing wrong when raised voices caught my attention.

“What the hell happened?” Asher shouted.

I raised an eyebrow.

“It’s nothing, I'm fine.” Zeke’s growl rolled from the kitchen.

“Let me take a look,” Miles ordered Zeke. “I’m calling in Dr. Zimmer.”

“I’ll take care of it!” Zeke growled.

Something was wrong; I walked faster.

“Then you’ll have no problem showing us your hand.” Asher pointed out, his voice rising.

I was jogging by the time I reached the kitchen. Zeke was on the kitchen side of the breakfast counter, a first aid kit open in front of him. His left hand was wrapped in bloody gauze; he was wrapping more gauze on top of the old.

“What happened?” I asked, my voice hard as I strode into the kitchen. Zeke was the only one who glanced at me, then he was back dealing with his hand again.

“I had an accident at work.” Zeke snapped as he pulled the gauze tight.

I stood across from Zeke at the breakfast bar and watched as blood continued to soak through the bandages. That wasn’t good.

“Miles, call the doctor. Tell him Zeke will probably need stitches,” I told him in a calm voice. I reached into the first aid kit and pulled out a pair of gloves. Miles pulled out his phone and dialed.

“I don’t need stitches,” Zeke was shouting now, his body becoming rigid.

I pulled on the gloves.

“Zeke you're bleeding through a lot of gauze. That’s not fine,” I snapped back at him as I grabbed more gauze and grabbed his hand. The mound of gauze was on the top of his hand, I put his hand flat on the counter, covering the top with my palm and pressed down with everything I had. Zeke grunted and clenched his teeth.

“That fucking hurts!” he snarled at me, hitting his other fist into the tile counter.

“Too fucking bad!” I snapped back. His scalding eyes rose to meet mine from across the counter. “We need to stop the bleeding, so suck it up!”

He bent over. His head faced down, looking at the floor in front him, his arms braced on the counter. He was taking deep breaths and letting them out slowly, his body shaking.

“Now what the fuck happened?!” I shouted at him, demanding an answer. The other guys backing up a step away from us.

“A fucking hood slammed down on my hand.” He growled at me, his head still down. “I managed to catch it just before it hit.”

A weight settled in my chest. How would a hood slam down on his hand? Zeke worked on cars a lot; it didn't sound like a mistake he would make.

“What are you leaving out, Zeke?” I growled, hoping my instinct was wrong.

Zeke hit the counter again.

“Zeke!” I barked at him again.

He looked up at me; his jaw clenched his eyes blazing.

“I fucking smelled patchouli right before it slammed down,” he snarled.

The guys cursed.

I felt myself go quiet inside, my head was clear and my body was still. I had only felt this one other time in my life, and I ended up beating the shit out of someone with a short crowbar.

“Okay, did you see any broken bones?” I asked, my voice calm now.

Zeke dropped his head again, his body still shaking. He hit the counter again.

“No broken bones. I can move everything,” he said, practically growling. “It just won’t stop bleeding.”

I kept the pressure on his hand. Zeke slammed his other fist into the counter again and again.

“Yeah, break your other hand, that’ll help,” Isaac snapped from somewhere behind me.

There was a buzzing sound in the kitchen. Miles went to the monitor on the wall and pressed the button to open the front gate.

“Doctor’s here.”

It turned out Zeke needed a dozen stitches. I watched silently as the doctor Miles had called worked to close the big gash across the top of his hand. When I thought no one would notice, I slipped out of the dining room and headed down the hall. I went into the kitchen and grabbed a tub of salt. I ignored the pounding in my ears as I headed outside and tossed that into the back of the Blazer. I walked around the outside of the house and found where the gardeners kept their tools. I picked up a shovel and a full gas can. I walked back to the blazer. I put those down and pulled down the tailgate.

The doctor's car was gone. He must have been finished with Zeke’s hand. My pulse was racing when I realized I didn’t have a lighter. I remembered seeing matches in a kitchen drawer. Still, in that numb calm, I walked inside and went to the kitchen. I opened the drawer.

“You okay, Beautiful?” Ethan asked.

I didn’t even see him in the room. That didn’t really bother me right now; I had something I needed to do. I nodded and pulled the matches out.

“What are you doing with the matches, Red?”

I hadn’t seen Isaac either, that’s okay. I was going to make sure they were out of this from now on. I closed the drawer and headed out of the kitchen.

“Lexie!” Isaac shouted after me. “What are you doing?”

I didn’t answer; I was trying to remember what else I needed. I was driving to the cemetery. Keys. I need the keys. Without keys, the truck wouldn’t start.

“Guys! Lexie has matches and has gotten real fucking quiet!” Ethan shouted down the hall as I walked into the living room.

I picked up my jacket and checked the pockets. Vaguely, I heard feet running down the hall. I found my keys.

“What’s going on?” Miles' voice was quiet behind me. I ignored them; I was almost out the door anyway.

“She came in, she got matches and hasn’t said...”

Isaac’s voice went out of earshot as I stepped outside. I reached the truck and picked up the shovel. I needed to get going. I had a lot of digging to do before dawn.

“Lexie, what do you think you're doing?” Zeke's voice came from behind me. I didn’t even hear him come out.

“Taking care of a problem,” I said as I put the shovel inside the back of the truck with shaking hands. Why was I shaking? Huh, I’ll figure it out later. I have to get going.

“You said you didn’t want to go that route, remember?” Miles' voice was gentle.

When did he get here? I focused on picking up the gas can and putting that in the back too.

“Things change.” I slammed the gate shut. The pounding in my ears was getting louder. I headed around the truck. Asher was standing in front of the driver side door. Where did he come from?

“Please move, Asher.” That numbness was starting to fade, and I wanted to get this done before that. I needed to get this done before that happened.

“Can’t do that, Ally.”

I needed to get in the Blazer, and Asher was blocking me. My skin was hot, edgy, the cool fall air was feeling really good right now. The other side. I can use the other door.

I went to walk around Asher, but he stepped in front of me. “We can’t let you do something when you're angry that you’ll regret later.”

I shook my head. I didn’t understand what he was saying. I wasn’t angry. I just needed to get this done now.

“I’m not angry, things are just very clear right now,” I said, my voice calm and flat. There was a curse, but Asher’s mouth didn’t move.

“Lexie, you’re severely pissed off and aren’t thinking straight.” Ethan’s voice was calm next to me.

I turned my head to see him standing there. I was confused; when did he get here? The numbness was starting to pull back. My skin was feeling tight. No. I couldn’t just stand around, I needed to keep going, keep moving. Before I began to feel again.

“Doesn't matter,” I said as my shoulders grew tense. “She hurt my friends. I hurt her. It’s very simple.” I reached for the driver door. There was another curse, maybe Ethan? Was Ethan still out here?

Asher moved back to block me.

“You said you didn’t want to go this route because you didn’t know what would happen to her. Do you remember that?” Isaac’s voice surprised me; I didn’t know he was here too.

I turned my head to see him stepping around Ethan. Ethan was still out here after all. When I couldn’t move forward, that numbness began pulling back. Fire licked in my gut as I pictured the marks on Mile’s neck, the blood on Zeke’s hand. It needed to stop. I needed to make that bitch stop. I felt my body really starting to shake. I needed to move.

“Screw her,” I managed to say through clenched teeth.

I still needed in the truck. I turned to walk around the back of the truck, only to find myself blocked. The others had spread out behind me, boxing me in. Didn’t they get it? Didn’t they understand that until I did this, this shit would just keep happening? That numbness pulled back further, my body became rigid as the fire in my gut built to a blaze. Feeling was coming back hard and fast. The numbness disappeared completely. The blaze rushed over me, showing me Zeke’s hand, Miles' neck. Over and over.

“You are not in the right place to make this decision tonight,” Zeke said, his voice calm. How the fuck was he so calm? He should be helping me take care of that bitch, not blocking me.

My blood was boiling. My hands were twitching to get moving, get digging. I took deep breaths through my nose. I wanted to hurt someone. I wanted to hit, beat and tear into someone until the rage was gone. I kept a tight hold on my body. I didn’t want to hit them; I didn’t want to hurt them. But they wouldn’t fucking move. I couldn’t get to that bitch.

I locked my body down, not daring to move an inch. Ethan saw the change in me; I saw it in his eyes.

“Maybe we should do this like Zeke and just hold her till she calms down?” Isaac suggested,

I looked from Ethan and glared at Isaac. Not if you want to live asshole. I held back a fresh wave a heat that tinged my vision red. I closed my eyes. Something was wrong. That wasn’t right. That was Isaac; I’d never want to hurt Isaac. What was wrong with me? I focused on breathing and keeping myself still. Something was very wrong.

“That would be a very bad idea,” Ethan advised. “She’s one wrong move from swinging at us.”

I really was, I was holding on by a thread. I could barely think, but I was trying to. I opened my eyes and looked at the gravel of the driveway. Still taking deep breaths.

“She needs an outlet, and we’re cutting her off from the only one she’s knows right now.” A hand was held out to me, palm up. “Lexie, you need to let all that out. Come with me, and I’ll show you what works for me.”

I stared at Ethan’s hand for a couple minutes, oddly noticing the calluses on his fingers from guitar strings. I kept taking deep breaths, trying to swim up through the rage. It had taken a while before I had enough control to trust myself to move. I lifted my eyes from the gravel to Ethan’s.

His amber eyes met mine and waited. He waited patiently for me to be ready to move. I reached out and put my shaking hand in his. His hand closed around mine.

“Brother, get my iPod from my room.” Ethan kept eye contact with me as he started walking backward, pulling me out from between the others. After a few steps, he must have realized I wasn’t going to fight him. He turned and led me back into the house, at a slow walk.

My blood was still boiling, my stomach a hard knot. I felt my jaw still clenched. I focused on moving, on not hitting anyone. On keeping myself under control. I had all this rage inside me, and I didn’t know how to get rid of it. He led me through the foyer and into the living room. He walked me carefully around the couch and had me sit looking towards the fireplace. I sat down, crossing my legs under me in the middle of the couch. I tucked my hands under my butt, hoping for a little more control. The pounding in my ears was still there. So, when Isaac was suddenly there; handing Ethan his iPod and headphones I didn’t really notice.

I was looking at the fireplace when Ethan sat down on the coffee table directly in front of me. His warm eyes met mine.

“I noticed something about you over the last week, Beautiful. You’re a bit of an audiophile.” He turned on his iPod and connected his headphones. He looked back to me, meeting my eyes again; keeping that connection with me. “You love music and sound, it puts you out of your head and changes how you’re feeling.” He reached out towards me. I went rigid, keeping my body still as he put his big headphones around my neck. “Right now, you want to rip someone apart, and we need to get that out of you.” He reached out again, my body still as stiff as a board. He put his headphones on my ears. “I want you to close your eyes, listen to the music and let yourself feel what you're feeling. And go where the music goes.”

I must have looked at him as if he was crazy because he kept talking.

“We’re not letting you leave the couch, but you need to get this out. Got it, Beautiful?”

I nodded slowly. He gave me a small smile and fiddled with the iPod. He went to a specific playlist that was labeled “pissed off”. He hit play and handed the iPod out to me. I pulled my right hand out from under me and took it gently. I closed my eyes as Drowning Pool’s Bodies began playing in my ears. I turned it up so I couldn’t hear anything else. And I did what Ethan told me to. I listened to the music and felt the rage I was holding inside. I didn’t fight it; I didn’t do anything about it. I just gave myself permission to feel how I was feeling. Then Disturbed’s Down With The Sickness came on. Then Korn, Then Metallica. Then Linkin Park.

Then when I felt like I needed to move, to do something else to get this out, I felt a touch on my hand. When did my hands move to my lap? I opened my eyes to find Ethan still sitting on the coffee table, pushing a large sketchpad and soft pastels into my lap. I took them gratefully, rocking with the beat of the music I was listening to. I didn’t ask where the art supplies came from, I just took them and started to use them. I drew dark scenes that poured from me in my anger. I drew, blended, and smudged. I wiped my fingers on my pants and kept going, ignoring everything and everyone else. I poured everything out of me onto the pages.

Then the music changed, it was subtle at first. Less driving beats and shouting, to less harsh songs. Seether, Halestorm, Within-temptation, and then more rock music blended with violins and then pianos. The tempo changed again. The songs became slower, vocals, piano, and violin. It ended with Disturbed’s The Sound of Silence.

When the music stopped, I blinked hard. I felt weak, my arms heavy. My heart was no longer racing. My breathing was smooth and even. I was drained, empty, and no longer needing to tear someone apart. I looked up to find Ethan still sitting on the coffee table, still watching me. I took off his headphones and looked at him with fresh eyes. I’d never seen Ethan angry except that business with my back, but he knew exactly how I had felt out there. That raging calm that took over. He understood it; he’d felt it himself. So often, that he had a play list specifically for it.

He sat waiting, his body was tense. His fingers were spinning one of his rings constantly. His knee started to bounce. I didn’t know how to tell him I understood how hard that was, letting me see that much of him. So, I untucked my feet, scooted to the edge of the sofa, my knees going between his legs. I reached out, pulling him into a hug. After a heartbeat, he wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me back. His body relaxed, his face resting against my hair. His spicy cologne filling my lungs.

“Thank you,” I whispered into his shoulder.

One of his hands moved to cup the back of my head.

“Always,” he whispered back, his smoky voice low.

“I might need a copy of that play list before this is over,” I admitted as I started to shake. I wasn’t ready to let go of him yet. He nodded against my hair. He let me hold onto him as long as I needed. He didn’t get impatient; he didn’t even shift his weight. He just held me as long as I needed. Warmth was flooding through me again. There was no wall there anymore. Not against him, not against any of them. When I finally stopped shaking I let go, he let me pull away. He brushed the hair from my face. His eyes were watching me still.

“Do you know why you decided to go to the cemetery?” he whispered, his face only inches from mine.

I dropped my gaze down to my knees. His black jean-clad legs were on the outside of mine. His hands cupping the sides of my legs, one of his thumbs rubbing back and forth. My throat was tight as I nodded.

“Can you tell me?” His voice was gentle again, soft and soothing.

“Meditating didn’t go well tonight,” I whispered back my cheeks burning. I scoffed at myself. “I couldn’t even get past the first step.” It was pathetic, I managed to fail immediately. “Zeke got hurt, he needed stitches.” I took a deep calming breath. “She’s escalating and getting stronger.” I looked at my black and red pastel covered fingers twisting in my lap. “The longer it takes to link with the Veil, the bigger the chance is that you guys will get hurt.”

“That’s the risk we all agreed to take,” he said, his voice rolling through my ears, making it hard not to listen.

I shook my head. “Zeke didn’t, majority rules,” I reminded him as I looked back up into his dark eyes.

Ethan gave me a gentle smile, his eyes running over my face again.

“He could have appealed, Lexie,” he said. “If Zeke felt that strongly about it, he would have appealed. We would have discussed it again.” He reached out and wiped his thumb across my cheek. It came back with black pastel on the tip. “He changed his mind when you told him why you didn’t want to use the cemetery route.”

I looked at him as if he was nuts.

“Zeke? Changed his mind?” I asked slowly just to be sure I heard correctly.

Ethan chuckled softly, his teeth flashing in a smile.

“It does happen on occasion, Beautiful.”

I didn’t know if I really believed him. I didn’t know what else to say, so I looked around the living room. It was empty, it was just us. My gaze went back to my lap.

“I have an idea to help you meditate that we can try tomorrow,” he said

“I’ll try anything,” I admitted, my cheeks still warm. I needed to get this right and soon. I pulled my gaze from my lap to his handsome face. I gestured behind me. “Everyone go to bed?”

He snorted quietly. He gave my legs one last squeeze before letting go and scooting further back on the coffee table.

“The guys forced Zeke to take a couple pain pills, so he’s sleeping up in his room,” he began. “When the others saw that you were calming down they went to bed. Miles put me in charge of making sure you go to bed.”

I felt lighter knowing I wouldn’t have to see anyone else tonight.

Ethan gestured at the drawings in my lap. “What do you want to do with these?”

I looked down in my lap. I picked them up, frowning. I couldn’t understand what I was seeing until I laid the four pictures out in my lap. I’d created several dark pictures, all interconnecting in a mosaic. My chest went tight as I realized what I was seeing. I scooped them up quickly, not wanting Ethan to see what I had drawn tonight. He didn’t need to know, the guys didn’t need to know.

“Burn them,” I whispered quietly, my voice small.

One of his eyebrows arched as he met my eyes. Asking me silently if I was serious.

“Please.”

His eyes turned into warm chocolate before he nodded and held his hand out for them. I didn’t even hesitate before handing them over.

I couldn’t get rid of them fast enough. Ethan got to his feet and walked around the coffee table. My body was twitchy, on edge. I needed to do something tonight to protect the guys; I couldn’t just wait till tomorrow. The knot in my stomach wouldn’t let me. I went into the kitchen and pulled down another tub of salt. When I stepped back into the living room, the drawings were burning in the fireplace. When they were ashes, I felt better, less naked.

Ethan turned, his worried eyes meeting mine. He had looked at them. He knew what I drew; I could see it in his eyes. The naked feeling came back as I looked away from him and at the tub in my hands. I swallowed hard before I could say anything.

“I just want to throw some salt on your guys’ bedroom floors.” I peeked back up at him knowing my cheeks were a little pink.

His eyes were understanding as he nodded. He took me upstairs and opened each of the guys’ bedroom doors. I tiptoed into every room and scattered salt by hand onto every floor. When we reached Zeke’s, Ethan grabbed my arm, stopping me from going inside. He took the salt from me and salted Zeke’s room himself. When he came back out, he handed it back to me. Ethan even watched me quietly as I did the same in his room. When we were done, those rooms were just as safe as being in a salt circle.

When I was satisfied, he walked me back downstairs. I was going to put the tub back in the kitchen, but he took it from me and went down the hall. I didn’t understand until he stepped into my room. By the time I got there, he had most of the room salted. I didn’t even think of salting my own room--it didn’t even occur to me.

But it had occurred to Ethan, and he did it himself. When he was done, he gave me a stormy look.

“You don’t get to make yourself a target.” His smooth voice was firm, his lips pressed together as his eyes held mine.

“I didn’t...”

He gave me a gentle smile. “Think past protecting us,” he said, finishing my sentence for me.

I nodded, massaging my arm with my other hand.

“Get some sleep, Beautiful.”

He walked past me and I heard the door close behind me. I had a sudden urge to call him back. I didn’t want to be alone. I kept my mouth closed as I went into the bathroom and washed the pastel chalk from my hands. When I was done, I looked in the mirror. My face was pale, my eyes wider than usual. There was black chalk on my face still. I washed my face as I remembered my drawings. I used a towel to dry, wishing I could wash the image of those five headstones out of my mind. And their lone guardian standing barefoot in the dead grass. I didn’t sleep well that night.