Chapter Seven

JAMIE

Cautiously glancing around the party, I try not to make eye contact with anyone so that I don’t have to deal with any unwanted conversations. I’ve yet to experience the rude behavior I expected from a Sutton Hill party, but I know it can’t be far away.

There’s no doubt that I’m an outsider here, but besides Sam’s sister Nikki, everyone seems to be warm and welcoming, which wasn’t really what I was expecting. I could sense Sam’s nervousness our entire ride here, but he refused to acknowledge it even when I asked.

Knowing I’m the first woman he’s ever introduced his family to makes me feel very special, but I can’t help but worry about the pressure he must feel under. Finally, after turning towards a loud, boisterous laugh, I spot him, surrounded by a group of men as they all battle to yell over one another.

He looks calm and relaxed, amongst his family and friends, and I feel grateful he’s invited me to such an intimate celebration. His mother definitely knows how to throw a party. This is nothing like any other Fourth of July barbeque I’ve ever been to, but the food is fantastic, so I guess the chefs were worth it.

From inside the group of guys, Sam begins to spin, squinting as he pores over the crowd of people, and I know he’s looking for me. My stomach clenches realizing that even amongst his friends, he’s still thinking of me, just as I do with him. He’s been doing an excellent job of showing me how he’s willing to change and adjust his life so that I can fit into his busy schedule.

Bringing me to his party is a massive step for him, and I don’t take it lightly. In fact, I plan on showing him just how much it means to me when we get home. Staring from across the lawn, I smile at how handsome he is, laughing and joking with his family. It’s a new side of him, and the more I get to know him, the more I like.

It occurs to me as I watch him, that he doesn’t know much about me and my past. While I’ve been pressuring him to open up, maybe I should take my own advice and tell him more about my upbringing and the crazy family that comes along with it. Just thinking about how he’ll take my destructive and chaotic family makes me cringe, but I guess it will be necessary for us to move to the next level.

“Hey, girl!” Alyssa calls, walking over to my hiding spot at the edge of the buffet table.

“Alyssa!” I smile, trying to perk up after spending the past twenty minutes hiding from all human interaction.

“Are you alright over here?” She asks, looking a bit concerned.

Without knowing much about them, I’d have to say that Alyssa is my favorite of Sam’s two sisters. She’s kind and welcoming and makes me feel right at home despite the obvious. I can tell from her reaction to her son earlier that she is observant, so I’m sure she’s noticed that I’m alone in a corner, looking like a real outsider.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I nod, trying my best to assure her. The last thing I want is to be paraded around the party as Sam’s girlfriend.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” She smirks while asking, and I know she’s alluding to the fact that I’m entirely alone.

“Yeah, it’s a really nice party,” I struggle to muster up some feigned excitement.

“I told you, our mom is obnoxious about these things. You don’t have to pretend it’s not weird,” she teases, gently nudging my side with her elbow.

“I was just telling Sam how it’s really nice to have these types of gathering. And everything is delicious,” I motion towards the long buffet table with everything you could possibly want to eat.

“You’re sweet,” she pauses, looking around the party before continuing. “So, tell me how you and Sam met. I’m sure he won’t spill any of the details without me prying him open.”

“Oh, we met at the dojo,” I answer after a few giggles.

“You do martial arts too?” She squeals excitedly.

“Yes, do you?” I frown, not taking her as the martial arts type.

“Hell no!” She slaps my arm, throwing her head back in laughter.

“I was going to be shocked,” I admit, laughing along with her.

I feel relaxed with Alyssa like I’ve known her for years. She could easily be a close friend of mine in another life. The party feels completely familiar now that she’s here, as we laugh together like two old friends.

“No, my only exercise these days is lifting a wine glass from the table to my mouth,” she jokes, and we laugh a bit linger together.

“Yeah, we both work out at the same dojo, so I used to see him every so often, and I guess it just grew from there,” I answer nervously, not wanting to tell too much since I have no idea what Sam has told his family about me if anything.

“That’s sweet. So you two are pretty new?” She asks, her thin lips curving upward as she hangs on to my every word.

“Oh yeah! We’ve just recently decided to give things a real shot, so only a few weeks,” I try to downplay our relationship.

“Well, he’s brought you here, so I’d have to say he’s as serious as you,” she smirks, give me the look of an old friend.

Every time I try to downplay my relationship to Sam, Lisa is continuously negated me, arguing that I only say that because I think he doesn’t feel the same. Sam is a discreet type of guy. He likes to keep his private relationship private, and I understand and respect that. The last thing I want to do is push him too far too fast.

His effort to show me how I can fit into his life is enough for me now, and I don’t want to mess up what we have by rushing it along. While Lisa, and now Alyssa, may think that’s unnecessary because of Sam’s reciprocation, I’m comfortable playing my position for the time being, as long as he continues to respect what we have in both public and private.

“I noticed you watching him while you were standing over here alone,” she mentions, tilting her head in anticipation of my response.

“I’ve never seen him with his family, so it’s a really nice treat to see this other side to him,” I admit, smiling through my nerves.

“You really love him, don’t you?” She asks, startling me.

“Yeah, I do,” I answer, looking down at my yellow toenails.

“I can tell, and there’s nothing to be ashamed of. I know my brother, and he wanted us to meet you because you’re special to him. While he may be a genius in the boardroom, I’m sure you’ve learned by now that he’s much less than that in relationships. Don’t give up on him, but he’ll have a bit of a learning curve,” she warns, and I nod knowingly as we both giggle.

“I’m just happy he’s making an effort. There’s nothing worse than not knowing how he feels, and since he doesn’t express his emotions too much, I have to gauge from his actions. Bringing me here was a strong statement,” I smile, sharing my recent thoughts.

“I always say that actions are the best way to judge someone’s feelings. A mouth will say anything you tell it to, but how you behave will serve as the true indicator of how you feel. He’s been looking for you since Michael pulled him away from you,” she motions towards Sam, who has just landed his eyes on the two of us.

With a nod and a smile, his shoulders relax as he realizes I’m in good hands with his sister before turning back to the group of guys. Alyssa’s admission makes it evident that she was watching us as we moved about earlier, and it makes me think she likes us together.

“He’s a good guy,” I sigh, looking on at him.

“Girl, you’ve got it bad!” She teases, and we both laugh together once more before her son begins running around the pool.

“No running!” She calls after him, but he doesn’t seem the least bit phased by her warning, as he races around the cement landing.

“I have to get him. I’ll see you later. Make sure to enjoy yourself. We don’t bite too hard,” she jokes before jetting off after her son.

Left back to my devices, I scour the party, looking through the clusters of people all grouped together like lunch tables in high school. There is an older group of men huddled together, with Sam’s Uncle John in the center, appearing to tell a funny story as everyone looks on in amusement.

Then another crowd of older women includes Aunt Debby, though she is not the center of attention. Instead, it’s a woman in a formal fitting dress that looks a bit too uncomfortable for a barbeque, as the other women listen on, clutching their pearls. Without hearing one word, I am sure they are gossiping.

Next, I turn towards the pool, where all the children are splashing and yelling, enjoying the sunny day. Watching as three young boys hit a beach ball back and forth, I wonder what it must have been like to grow up in such a picturesque environment.

Turning back to the house, I shake my head at the grand architecture. By far the largest house I’ve ever seen, I can’t imagine calling a place like this home. No wonder Sam and I are so different, our lives aren’t even comparable.

Just as my eyes begin traveling back over the crowd, I feel a strange vibe, as if someone is watching me. Turning, I see a group of younger women, all looking at me with envy on their faces. Even now, with me returning their stare, they don’t turn away, as if they have the right to keep an eye on me.

Nikki, Sam’s sister who greeted us when we arrived, is in the center of the women. They all look stunningly beautiful, with their hair and make-up styled like they’ve just left the runway of a fashion show. Unlike everyone else, they’re standing off of the lawn, in a small cement circle near an outdoor bar. I imagine it’s to keep their stilettos from getting dirt on them, but who knows.

Finally, I turn around, accepted defeat in the stare down contest. I can hear their catty laughter behind me as I make my way inside the house. Maybe a little air conditioning will do me some good because I am just about ready to overheat from the pressure and those obnoxious girls.

Just when I’ve made my way into the living room, I watch through the wall of glass doors as Nikki walks with her arms interlocked with a beautiful blonde woman, heading towards the group of guys.

With her hand on his arm, Nikki pulls Sam from the crowd, and I watch in silence as she seems to introduce the two. My heart sinks as I force myself to turn away. I know that I’m nothing like the girls that Sam grew up with, and although he assures me that he likes that about me, I can’t fight the insecurity seeping through my veins. Is that the type of girl he wants? Or, even worse, is she the type of girl he needs?