One week later

Walking through Third Street Promenade is exciting and overwhelming at the same time. The shining sun and cool breeze provides the perfect weather to walk along the sea of people shopping at the upscale stores. I find myself smiling, even though I’m not here to shop I can still look and daydream, right? That’s allowed.

“Hannah.” Shae, shouts and waves to get my attention. I turn and wave back.

“You came,” she says excitedly as we hug briefly.

“Well, it’s not like I travel often, so I said what the heck, I’m not staying in the hotel room.” Visiting L.A. was something I didn’t expect, but thanks to my awesome boss, I was able to come and attend the Bride World Expo. And thanks to a little persuasion from my new friend, Shae, I hopped on an Uber and came to meet her for lunch and some sightseeing.

“I knew I liked you for a reason.” Shae links her arm through mine and we start walking. “Come on, I’m starving. What are you in the mood for?”

“I could eat a horse right now. I got so caught up trying to look at as many vendors as I could that I forgot to grab something to eat earlier,” I answer candidly. “Can we go somewhere casual though?” Glancing down at my worn jeans and black top, and then at Shae’s clothes, I laugh. “You look like a supermodel and I look like I just got out of bed.”

“Shut up, you look great. Do you know how much people pay for jeans that look like they’ve been beaten up?”

I raise a brow, questioningly, “I’m guessing a lot?”

“Yep. Do you like pizza?” Shae asks.

“Of course I do. Who doesn’t? Crazy people?” I joke.

“Just checking, I know the perfect place and their pies are to die for.”

My stomach growls as we enter the pizza place. The delicious scent has me salivating. “Wow, this place is amazing,” I notice.

“Prepare to experience a foodgasm,” Shae laughs and I join her. “I can’t wait.”

Once our food arrives, we dig in and after a few bites I can feel myself relax and decide to get to know a bit more about Shae. We met at the Expo’s registration line. She must have seen the anxiety on my face and immediately introduced herself. She even helped me navigate some of the vendors’ stands. We exchanged numbers in case we got separated and after the madness started we didn’t have much time to talk.

“So, you travel a lot for work?” I ask, curiously.

“You could say that,” she answers vaguely.

“Well, the last time I was in L.A. I was eight and my parents took me to Disney world for my birthday.”

“Really?” She sounds surprised. “You live so close.”

“Yeah, but money has always been tight, especially since,” I pause and take a deep breath as she watches me attentively, “since my mom died, three years ago.”

“Oh, Hannah I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up sad memories.”

“It’s ok, I guess it never gets easy to talk about her, you know? I miss her so much.” Shae’s eyes cast a shadow of sadness but it’s so brief, before I can ask her about her family she changes the conversation. “So, when is your big day?”

“My big day?” I ask, confused.

“Yeah, you were at the convention shopping around for your wedding, right?”

“No, I work at a bakery and my boss wants to take more wedding catering accounts. She thought it would be good if I came and learned about the different options they offer. She likes to keep up with the big players and what’s on trend.” I smile thinking of how supportive Nat has been and add, “she also thought I could use a break. My boyfriend and I broke up recently.”

Shae puts a slice on her plate and wipes her mouth with the napkin. “How long were you two together?”

“Well, we were friends for three years before we decided to date and then dated for five years.”

“Wow, that’s a long time.” I nod. “What happened?” Shae’s expression is concerned.

I shrug. “We changed, and grew apart.” Shae gives me a stern look. “Do you still love him?”

That’s the same question I asked myself over and over after Danny and I broke up. My dad and Nat asked me the same thing and the answer hasn’t changed. “I do. I care about him as I know he cares about me. We’ve known each other for almost a decade, but we’re more friends than lovers. He was comfortable and so was I, but there was no passion, you know?” Shae nods in understanding, and for the first time I voice what’s been on my mind since the last time Danny and I kissed. “I don’t want comfort, I want to feel goosebumps whenever a guy touches me. I want to feel wanted when he kisses me; I want someone that can’t keep his hands off me. And Danny wasn’t that guy for me,” I confess.

“Well, Hannah, it sounds like you know exactly what you want and you know what’s the best way to get it?” I shake my head no, waiting for her to tell me. “You need to put yourself out there, meet new people, go on dates.”

I rest my head on my hands and press my fingers lightly to my temples. “Dating. I don’t even know where to start. I’m too old for that.”

“Old?” Shae questions loudly, causing heads to turn our way. “You’re crazy.” She crosses her arms over her chest. “How old are you?”

“Twenty-four.”

“Well, I’m twenty-five and about to turn twenty-six, so that makes me an antique, then?” A snort escapes from me and I cover my mouth.

“Seriously, Hannah, you’re being silly. You could have any guy you wanted, you just need to stop making excuses and go for it.”

“I don’t even know guys, my ex and I had the same circle of friends, and I would never date one of them.”

“Well, I have the perfect solution for that.”

“Oh yeah,” I challenge, “let’s hear it.” Shae stands and I can see she’s going to try and change my relationship status.

Ha. Good luck with that.

“You and I are going out tonight. Come on, we can get ready at my hotel.”

“But,” I try to argue and she stops me. “No buts, Hannah, and no excuses. It’s happening.”

Well, ok then.

* * *

“OMG, this place is so cool,” I shout as Shae and I each take a seat at our table. Grabbing my hair, I twist it, raising the strands away from my skin. I can feel the drops of sweat making their way down my neck to my exposed back. My feet are starting to protest thanks to the six inch heels Shae made me wear, but I haven’t had this much fun in a long time.

“I told you,” Shae shouts back. “I love coming to Harvelles, they always have something different to offer.”

Glancing around the packed nightclub, I notice most of the crowd is standing. “I can’t believe you managed to get us a table.”

“I have my ways.” She winks.

“Why do I feel like you’re hiding something from me?” I scrunch my nose. While we were getting ready at Shae’s hotel I could see her typing away on her phone and next thing I knew, a car was waiting to bring us to the club. The bouncer let us in when we arrived, no waiting in line before we had a table. “Are you some sort of celebrity?”

Shae offers me a shot and I take it, we clink our glasses and drink them, the cold liquid instantly making me shiver. “Not at all. I’m dating a guy who spends a lot of time in clubs, and we’ve been here a couple of times. I just messaged him and asked if he’d get us a table.”

“Oh, is he your boyfriend?” She shakes her head no.

“Not exactly, I’m seeing a couple of guys.” She must notice the questioning look on my face because she laughs and continues, “technically they’re not my boyfriends, but I do have a sort of relationship with some of them.”

“I don’t get it,” I admit.

“Have you ever heard the term sugar baby?” I shake my head no.

“Are you trying to tell me that you are...” I hesitate, not knowing how to say the word without offending her.

“A hooker?” Shae beats me to it. I nod, not knowing what else to say. It all makes sense now. She’s staying in a suite at the Hampton Inn, her wardrobe is full of designer and expensive clothes and jewelry, and I’m pretty sure the shoes I’m wearing cost more than my entire closet. She hasn’t let me pay for anything even when I offered.

“God, the look on your face right now is priceless.”

I take another shot and snap out of it. “I’m sorry, it wasn’t my intention. I don’t really care if you, umm, well…”

“No, Hannah, I’m not a hooker. Well, most people will say the opposite, but I rarely have sex in exchange for money.” She signals the waiter for more drinks and turns to me. “I’m a sugar baby. That’s what I do.”

“What’s a sugar baby?”

“We date older men, mostly.”

“But you get paid to have sex, right?” I blurt out, and regret it immediately. I don’t want to sound as though I’m judging her.

“Yes, we get paid for dates, but it’s not always about having sex. Some of them need someone to attend an event with, some look for companionship, to spend an hour or two talking about their day with you. And some will want the full girlfriend experience, so it will involve sex, as long as you’re comfortable with that. The only difference between us and a normal girlfriend is we always discuss upfront what kind of arrangement we’ll have and what we expect from our relationship.”

“That’s what you do for work?” I ask, intrigued.

Shae nods. “It’s what pays my bills right now. I’ve always dreamed of being a fashion designer, but that’s not easy to achieve or cheap. I’m taking some classes and hopefully through my sugar daddies I can make some beneficial connections that will help me in the future.”

I laugh at the ‘sugar daddies.’ “Do they ask to be called daddies?”

“Well, I can’t say I haven’t done it.” We both burst out laughing.

“What about your family? Do they know?”

Shae sighs. “The important people in my life know, not all of them approve but I can’t say I’d change the way I live for anyone. As long as I’m being smart and I’m safe, it’s all good.”

“Well, I think it’s really interesting.” I smile. “And as long as you’re happy, who cares what others think.”

“Cheers to that,” she toasts.

We leave the club a little past two a.m. and we’re in the car on our way to the hotel when my phone starts to ring. Taking it out of my purse, I smile when I see Nat’s name on my screen. I sent her a few drunk pics earlier just to let her know I was having a good time.

“Hey Nat. I’ve had the best day ever. Shae and I, Shae is my new friend, by the way, just left one of the best places I’ve been. We need to come together sometime, the music is awesome and their cocktails are yummy.” I ramble, but Nat stops me. “Hannah, I’m sorry but you need to come home.”

Nat’s tone tells me something’s not right. “What’s wrong Nat? Is Holly okay?” My head spins and I sit up straight, bracing myself for Nat’s answer. Shae waves her arms in front of me and mouths ‘what is it.’ I shake my head as I hear Nat on the phone. “Holly’s fine, but your dad…”

“My dad, what happened to my dad, Nat?”

“He had a heart attack. Please come home.” A sob escapes me and everything starts spinning. I rest my forehead against the car window and tighten my hold on the phone. The cool glass accentuates the heat taking over my body.

“I’m on my way.” I end the call and turn to Shae, “I need to go home. Can you please take me to my hotel so I can pack up my stuff and get on the road?”

“What happened?”

“My dad had a heart attack. I need to get home.”

“You can’t drive, Hannah. Not like this.”

“Trust me, I’ve sobered up,” I tell her, feeling the weight of the night’s drinks and the news crashing over me.

“It’s almost three in the morning,” she reminds me.

“It’s a two hour drive,” I inform her. “I’ll make it. I can’t stay here not knowing how he is.”

“Well then, let’s go. I’m coming with you.” I want to refuse and say I can handle it but I’m not sure this time I can so I just nod and accept her offer.

“Is there anything you need to grab from your hotel?” Making a quick mental check, I know I have my phone and ID. Everything else isn’t worth the drive to the hotel, all I need is to get to my dad as fast as possible.

“No, you?”

She shakes her head, “Where to?” I give my address to Stephen, the driver, and when he signals a turn to enter the 405, I send a silent prayer for my dad to be okay.