I stretched my arms over my head and snuggled deeper under the covers. I was exhausted and sore, and I felt freaking amazing. I patted around the bed for Trevor, but he was gone. Instead, I found a note.

I just went to finish work on a project. If you wake up and miss me, come find me.

I grinned, but the rational part of my brain intruded. Don't get too comfortable.

I shoved the thought away. But I had to wonder… what was going to happen now? Grabbing a pillow, I dragged it over my head. Physically, we worked. Like, really worked. My skin was still buzzing from the electricity of his touch. But what did this mean? He was still getting over his ex, and I clearly had some trust issues.

It's not like we’d had any conversations about what we were doing here. Everything in the library had happened in a blur of hormones and tongues. And then we’d come home to find everything in crisis. So we had to go.

After the adrenaline spike of my uncle’s hospital visit, I’d needed comfort. I giggled, thinking about just how he comforted me. There hadn’t been much time for conversation.

I still couldn’t believe he’d wanted me to stay with him all last night. I hadn't expected it. I hadn’t even asked. As soon as I’d received the news, he’d just said "Let's go."

What in the world had I done to deserve him?

He's not yours.

This was true. It seemed like things worked better when we actually had conversations. Which meant we were going to have to address the whole ‘Hey, we’re still roommates and we boned’ situation. Was this a thing, or was it nothing?

Well, how do you feel about it?

I wanted to do it again. And again, and again. I liked him. Even when he was being an arrogant ass, he was still kind of snarky and funny. But also, he could have those totally sweet moments. Not to mention, he was smart, like really damn smart.

Time to stop procrastinating. I ditched the pillow and pushed up to a sitting position in bed. I was so screwed. I really liked him. One moment, we were sniping at each other, well, more him sniping at me, pushing my buttons. The next, he’d kissed me in the kitchen, and I was being distracted by his morning moaning in the shower.

Then the next thing I knew, we were making love in the stacks at the library. And he was holding my hand in the hospital, telling me it was going to be okay.

After Brian, I hadn't thought I was capable of falling for someone again. Trust was a problem. And with someone as good-looking as Trevor, no doubt he had a million girls following him around. Would I be able to trust him? Would I be constantly worried about him screwing someone else?

You’re getting ahead of yourself.

Conversation first. And if he wanted to be friends with benefits, I could be okay with that.

No, you can't.

Okay, fine. No, I couldn't. I knew myself. Eventually, I’d be looking for more, and that was where I would get burned. That's not you. And that will hurt. Because there would be others.

I had to stop being a coward and go talk to him. We could have this conversation like adults. Because at the end of the day, letting him go now would be a hell of a lot easier than getting really attached to him and having to let him go later.

I tossed on a T-shirt before padding out into the hallway. But when I opened the door, I froze at the sound of a familiar voice.

"I brought you doughnuts. I figured since you were studying hard, and have a sweet tooth, I’d bring you a little sugar to help keep you going,” she cooed.

My stomach squeezed, even as I threw up a little in my mouth. That was Jenny of the big-boob and little-brain fame. Despite myself, I couldn't help but lean in and listen.

"Jenny, you can’t be here right now."

She shrugged. "Look, I know it's early. And you’ve probably got studying or some other sexy thing you do shirtless and with glasses on. But you never called me after the other night. And you know, this girl was starting to get her feelings hurt." She sidled up to him. "I figured I'd give you a chance to make it up to me."

Trevor stepped away from her. "I was meaning to call you."

Jenny grinned and stepped forward again. This time she wrapped her hand around his–

I didn’t wait to see what else happened. It was time to go.

I was careful to close my bedroom door with a soft click before leaning against it, sharp, ragged breaths tearing out of my chest.

What the hell was wrong with me? How did this keep happening to me? This is what you get for sleeping with your roommate. I had to get the hell out of here. Without over-thinking, I grabbed a duffel bag and threw some clothes in before snatching up my backpack. I was dressed and in the hallway in five minutes.

I tried to bypass Trevor, but he called out. "Natalie? Where are you going?"

Unable to help the sob, I blurted out, "I figured you’d be too busy with Jenny to notice me leaving. Don’t worry, I’m out of your hair."

I didn't look back when the door slammed behind me.

I called after her. "Natalie, wait. It’s not what it looks like." She was already gone.

I only hesitated for a moment before sprinting into my room and grabbing my running shoes. I barely had them on before I yanked open the front door to go after her. I stopped short when I found Professor Washington with her hand raised about to knock on the door.

"Professor. What are you doing here? Is everything okay with your husband?"

"Yes. He's fine. He's in recovery and doing well. I just came because Natalie forgot her phone." She held up the phone for me to see.

"Oh. You just missed her. I'm actually headed out after her. She's upset. We had a fight. Actually, not really even a fight."

Damn it. Why was I telling her all of this?

My advisor nodded her head. "Do you mind if I come in for a minute?"

I hesitated, because I knew that with every second that ticked by, Natalie was disappearing somewhere, and it would be more difficult to find her. But my brain was at least functional enough to know that I couldn't exactly say no to my advisor.

"Sure. Come on in."

I stepped aside and let her into the apartment. When she stopped at the kitchen counter, she slid Natalie’s phone toward me.

"Listen, I appreciate everything you've done for her. Giving her a place to stay after I sort of twisted your arm. And after yesterday, the support you've given her… it's great." She swallowed and licked her lips.

"But?" I stomach cramped. I didn't like where this conversation was headed.

"But, you and I have been working on getting you international opportunities. You made it extremely clear that you wanted to travel and live abroad. You wanted opportunities that got you away from the US for a while so you could broaden your horizons. And that's what we're focusing on."

I frowned. "Yeah? What does that have to do with anything?"

“It can’t have escaped you that after everything she’s been through, Natalie needs something stable. If you were sticking around, then I would be over the moon. You're a good kid, smart. One of my best students, and I think you got a raw deal with Courtney. But you're not staying. You're leaving. My husband and I practically raised that girl, and I know she would be heartbroken. I can see it in her eyes. You already have the power to break her heart."

I shook my head. “That's not what I'm trying to do.” I ran a hand through my hair. "I swear I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I don't even know what's happening. But I like her."

Professor Washington put her hand over mine on the counter. "Yes. You like her. But even before Courtney left, you were hyper focused on your career. When you had a girlfriend, you chose school. Which, frankly, is what you should choose at this age. You chose to focus on your work and not focus on her. And when the time comes again, you will choose your job. You will choose to leave Natalie behind. Because it's what you have to do. The thing is, as her aunt, I think Natalie deserves more than that.”

“So do I.”

“Especially after the last guy she dated, she deserves someone who's going to choose her. She deserves someone who's going to love her. Not just someone who's using her as a stop on the way to something else.”

She put up her hand to stop me when I started to speak. "And I don't mean that you're using her. What I mean is, given everything that you want, given who you are, when push comes to shove, you will not choose her. And that's going to hurt her. It's kinder to let her go now."

After she left, I stared at the door for a long moment. There was still time. I could still run after Natalie. I’d check the library. I’d check with her friend Alex, if I could find him. I could still go after her.

Or was Professor Washington right? To me, Natalie was temporary. I wasn't planning on staying here. And she'd just moved here with her own career goals. Maybe I should let her go. It was better to let go now than later, after all.

Except, why was there a burning hole in the middle of my chest?