“Mommy!” Mason yells as he comes running to me when Ms. Winston lets me in.

“Honey, don’t run in the house,” I scold him before kneeling down to give him a big hug and a kiss. I missed him terribly today.

“Sorry, Mommy.”

“Did you have fun today?”

“Yes. Ms. Maggie’s kids came to play today. Ms. Winston sure has a lot of grandkids.”

I look up at Ms. Winston, who starts laughing at Mason’s statement, thankful she isn’t offended.

“Yes, honey, I sure do.” She chuckles.

“It sounds like you had a good day.” I kiss him one more time before standing. “Go get your things, sweetie.”

“Won’t you stay for a minute? I just made some cookies for the kids and some fresh iced tea.” She closes the door behind me, making my escape more awkward.

“I really should be going.” I try one last time to avoid her southern hospitality. I love her to death, but I’m just not used to all this attention.

“Come on, your mama told me the other day at the Piggly Wiggly that you have been nonstop run, run, run, since you first stepped foot in Clover. You need to learn to relax a little,” she says, walking toward her kitchen.

Now, if I don’t join her, I will be rude. “Mason, go get your backpack and meet me in the kitchen, okay?”

“Yes, ma’am,” he says, starting to run off.

“Mason!” I call out before he slows down. I follow Ms. Winston to her gorgeous kitchen, sitting down on a barstool. “Okay, you win, but unsweetened for me, please. I’m gaining weight since I’ve returned.”

“All this good southern cooking will do that. You look beautiful to me,” she says, handing me a glass.

“Thank you.”

“So, how have you been, sweetie?” she asks, standing opposite of me.

“Great. I mean, today was just my first day, but so far it seems good.” I take a sip of the cold tea, and try to relax. Mama was right, I have been nonstop since I moved back. Staying busy helps me avoid missing Brent.

“I don’t mean the job, I mean you. How are you doing?”

“I’m fine. Honestly, I should be asking you this,” I say to her, knowing we are now both members of the widows’ club.

“I’m lonely. A lot,” she admits.

I look at her strangely, knowing the large family she has.

“I know what you’re thinking, but I don’t mean lonely like I have no one. I mean lonely because my heart is broken. Frank was not only my husband, he was my best friend. I miss our talks and the way he always made me laugh. I’m only fifty-five. I had over thirty-five wonderful years with him, but I expected to have more,” she says as her eyes start to glisten with tears.

“I know what you mean.” I begin to tear up, too.

“Oh, honey, listen to me feeling sorry for myself,” she says as she wipes her eyes before setting a plate of tempting homemade peanut butter cookies in front of me.

“It’s okay.” I reach my hand out to pat hers, hoping to comfort her. “I’ve had a few years to accept it, it’s still new to you. I understand exactly what you’re feeling. He was the love of your life. We only get that once.”

She nods, unable to speak.

Mason walks in and we both regain our composure over our melancholy moment just in time.

“I’m ready, Mommy. Are you okay?” he asks. Unfortunately, it’s not the first time he has caught me crying.

“Of course I am, sweetheart. Go give Ms. Winston a hug and thank her for watching you today.”

“Thank you.” He goes over to her, giving her a hug.

“You’re welcome, sweetie. I put some cookies in your bag for you and Mommy to share with Uncle Mike and Aunt Holly.”

“Thank you. They’re my favorite,” he says.

“They’re your Aunt Holly’s, too. Make sure she doesn’t eat them all.” She laughs.

I get up from the barstool and go around to give her a quick hug. I feel so badly for wanting to escape earlier. Sometimes I forget that I’m not alone when it comes to losing someone so close. “If you ever need to talk, call me,” I whisper to her.

“Same to you, sweetie, thank you,” she says.

Driving home from Ms. Winston’s, I notice the newspaper beside me with Tom Sullivan’s picture staring at me. It’s like he is taunting me or something. I shake my head at the thought of Amy’s crazy comments today about catching men’s eyes.

“Mommy, can we watch this when we get home?” Mason asks from the back seat as I drive us home.

“Watch what?”

“This movie you have.” He holds the movie up so I can see it in the rearview mirror. Tom Cruise stares at me.

“Honey, I don’t know. I think it’s a grown-up movie.”

“Please, Mommy? It has jets,” he whines.

“I know, but it’s not like the shows you watch at home. It has kissy stuff that you think is gross.” I try, hoping that’s enough to change his mind.

“You can fast-forward through the gross stuff,” he says.

“We’ll see, okay?”

“Okay.” He huffs a little.

Mason has been infatuated with planes ever since we took one back in February to come to Mike and Holly’s wedding. The pilot had even given him a set of wings and had introduced himself. Ever since then, that’s all he wants—movies about planes, toy planes, and even airplane bedding for his room.

“Uncle Mike said there is an air show on Saturday. Can we go?” He changes the subject.

“I thought maybe you and Uncle Mike could go alone, like a boys’ day.” I look at him through the mirror to see the disappointment in his eyes.

“I thought we could all go. You don’t spend as much time with me as you used to.”

My heart breaks at his words. He’s right. I’ve been so busy these last few weeks that I just seem to drop him off here or there to anyone who is available to watch him. There are many things I can take in my life, but disappointing my son is not one of them. “Okay, we’ll all go.” I cave.

“Yay! You will have fun, Mommy, just wait and see.”

“I can’t wait, buddy.” I glance at the paper, wondering if I will run into the handsome officer again.

After arriving at Mike and Holly’s, I quickly help Holly with dinner. I feel like such a burden to them and jump at any chance to help when I can.

“Just the three of us tonight. Mike has a longer shift,” she says as I set only three plates on the table, putting the fourth back in the cupboard.

“Is he still liking it?” I ask. I’m so proud of Mike for following his dream of becoming a police officer, but I fear for him.

“Oh, he loves it. It is what he was meant to do.”

“Mommy, can we watch the movie now?” Mason comes into the kitchen with the movie in hand for at least the twentieth time since we first walked into the house.

I’m about to scold him for interrupting but Holly chimes in. “You might as well just get it over with. He’s obsessed. Besides, he’ll probably zonk out in the first half hour.”

“I’ve never watched it. Is it full of s-e-x?” I ask, spelling out the word in front of Mason.

“With today’s standards, it’s pretty tame,” Holly jokes. “No worries, I have watched it several times with Mike. I’ll let you know when to fast-forward.”

The guilt trip that he unintentionally gave me in the car has me giving in. Maybe watching a movie with him will help with this feeling I have that I’m neglecting him.

“Okay, we will watch it after dinner,” I say as he begins to jump up and down. “But listen,” I continue as he stops and waits. “First go get in your pajamas, and you’ll have to brush your teeth after we eat,” I add as he bolts out of the kitchen. “And stop running in the house,” I yell to him.

The two-hour movie doesn’t take long when you are fast-forwarding through all the romantic stuff. Holly was wrong. Mason doesn’t fall asleep snuggled up beside me. In fact, he sits with his eyes glued to the screen when the airplane scenes are on. Holly, on the other hand, is napping most of the time. Luckily, I can figure out when it is time to fast-forward.

“Mommy, that movie was so awesome, thank you,” he says as he hugs me closer.

“You’re welcome,” I say before kissing the top of his head.

“I can’t wait for Saturday.”

“Okay, time for bed. Off to brush your teeth. I’ll be in there in a minute to tuck you in.”

He hugs my neck and takes off for the bathroom.

“I think I will hit the hay, too. Lately, I have been so sleepy,” Holly says in between yawns.

“You’re not waiting up for Mike?”

“He knows where I sleep,” she kids.

“Good night.”

“Night,” she says, heading to her room.

After tucking Mason in for the night, I come out to the living room and start the movie over. The romantic scenes were good, but the scene where Meg Ryan loses her husband hit me hard. No one warned me about that. I actually find myself jealous of her. At least she had a friend to cry on and a military family to help her.

I replay the scene of that night when the officers came to tell me about Brent over and over in my head. I had no one at the time to comfort me—no one. I had to be strong. Even when my family did arrive the next day, I was already numb and wouldn’t break down.

Mike walks in as I pause the movie and wipe my eyes in the darkness of the room.

“Hey, Sis, you’re up late. Everything okay?” he asks as he turns on the lamp on the other side of the room.

“Yeah, just got done watching a movie,” I whisper quietly as he walks over to the couch.

“Hey, it’s Top Gun, one of my favs. ‘I feel the need. The need for speed.’ ” he says, quoting the famous line. “Where’s Holls?” he asks, sitting down beside me.

“She was sleepy, so she went to bed.”

“She’s been sleepy a lot lately,” he says, reclining back in the couch.

A thought occurs to me when he says that, reminding me of how tired I was when I was pregnant with Mason. “Uh-oh.” I smile over at him.

“Uh-oh, what?” he says, leaning back and relaxing.

“Is it possible she’s pregnant?” I ask him.

He looks over at me like I’m crazy. “What? Nah, she wants to wait a year.” He smiles before closing his eyes again.

I wait as I watch his smile fade and he opens his eyes again, looking at me.

“I mean, I guess it’s possible. You think that’s it?”

“I’m not sure, but maybe.”

“What should I do?” He sits up, looking concerned.

“Don’t panic, just maybe suggest she take a home pregnancy test. They are really accurate now.”

“Should she take it now? Do we have any here?”

I start laughing. “Easy, Brother, don’t wake her. Just talk to her in the morning. She knows where to find one.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” He laughs as he gets up from the couch. “All right, Sis, see you in the morning. Mason told you we are going to the air show Saturday, right?”

“That’s all he has talked about,” I tell him as he starts to head for the bedroom before stopping to face me one more time.

“I know being here is, well, sort of cramped right now. But I’m so glad you and Mason came back. You belong here, just wait and see.”

I’m touched by my baby brother’s tender words, especially recalling how I used to pick on him so much when we were growing up. The tides have turned and now I feel like he’s more of the big brother, the protector. I’m just glad he holds no grudges. “Thank you. And I will be finding a place soon, so no worries about the cramped house.”

“Please don’t rush. We love having you. Love you, Sis. Good night.”

“Love you, too. Good night.”

The next morning, I continue taking notes of things I feel need to be improved on in the library, as well as getting my name added to the accounts. Amy and I straighten and rearrange and start planning different events to get more excitement to the library.

Before I know it, the rest of the week is up and it is Friday evening. My phone starts going off with the sound of the TV show Cops theme song, alerting me that it’s Mike calling. He was off duty today and volunteered to watch Mason for me.

“What’s up? Is Mason okay?”

“He’s fine, Sis. I’m calling to find out what time you will be home.”

“I’m leaving in just a few minutes. Did you need something?”

“No, just wanted to know what time. Holly and I are taking you to dinner tonight.”

“You are? What’s the occasion?”

“Nothing special. We’ve all been so busy, I thought it would be nice to go out just us grown-ups.”

“Sure, that sounds great, but what about Mason?”

“Mom and Dad dropped by earlier and stole him from me. They took him with them and were going to take him out for pizza later. You know how they are, trying to catch up on the whole grandparent spoiling thing.”

“Yes, and I wish they would stop,” I joke.

“Cut them some slack, Sis. You were gone for a while. They have a lot of catching up to do. He is the only grandkid so far.”

I pause for a second, wanting to ask him if Holly has taken a pregnancy test yet. Since the other night, neither one has mentioned it to me, making me wonder if he is giving me a hint. I won’t interrogate him yet, but maybe I will at dinner tonight. “Okay, we’re closing up. I’ll be home in a few.”