Chapter 16
Maggie
“Full house. Read ’em and weep, ladies,” Sloane says as she lays her cards down with flourish. And yup… three jacks and two nines. The petite blonde with blue eyes flashes a grin as she rakes the large pile of chips in the center of the table toward her staggering pile that’s almost cleaned everyone else out.
“Damn it,” Callie says as she tosses her cards facedown. “You are the luckiest bitch I’ve ever seen.”
Callie is absolutely gorgeous with her chocolate-brown hair and eyes that are green like mine but much lighter, so they absolutely pop on her face. She belongs to Woolf, who I’ve come to learn a lot more about tonight as I’m treated to my first girls’ poker night. Bridger had plans with some friends who flew in from New York City. He was going out to dinner with them and then was going to take them to The Silo. I’d lie if I didn’t say I was jealous.
Jealous that he didn’t ask me to go out to dinner with his friends and jealous he’s going to be hanging out in his sex club tonight, both of which are ridiculous because I’m in hiding and can’t go out in public. I wanted to question him about the club though… get reassurances he wouldn’t fuck someone else, but in the end, I didn’t have the guts. He owes me nothing, and he’s made it clear he has hang-ups when it comes to relationships.
Besides, it’s not like I could go anyway. I had Belle to watch, and that was fine by me. I couldn’t get enough of her, and I spent most of the day annoying her because I constantly wanted to cuddle when all she wanted to do was play. I had to satisfy myself that at least when she took her afternoon nap, she did it in my arms while I sat happily for almost two hours while she slept.
Bridger had been doing some work most of the day out in a large, detached shed that sits off the back of the house, but he came in before he got ready to leave for the evening. He advised me he’d invited some friends to come over and sit with me tonight. I was a little pissy that he was going out and I was staying here, and I assured him in what I think was a snotty tone that I didn’t need babysitters.
He cocked a gorgeous eyebrow at me and said, “They’re not babysitters, Mags. They’re a group of girls I think you’d get along well with so you can have some fun for a change.”
That made me feel like shit for all of about five minutes, but then I got jealous again when he said he was going to take a shower before he had to leave for dinner.
Ugh.
Why does he have to be so complicated?
Why do I have to fall for a complicated man?
“Let’s open another bottle of wine,” Cat says as she stands from the table.
The final member of our girl’s gang, Auralie, also stands up and says, “I’ll help you get it and some more snacks.”
These women showed up about four hours ago with pizzas, chips, and wine, and I was immediately overwhelmed. It’s clear that Callie and Sloane are very close, and I later learned they’ve known each other the longest. Callie is the governor’s daughter, and Sloane was working undercover for a magazine trying to expose both the governor and Callie for their ties to The Silo through Woolf. Talk about a rocky start, but they both laugh when they talk about it.
I also learned with interest that Bridger’s best friend, Woolf, left The Silo and gave it all up so he could be with Callie, whose dad is up for re-election. That’s true love, indeed. Sloane ended up falling in love with a man named Cain who is head of security for both The Wicked Horse and The Silo. She was apparently using him to try to get dirt for the story. He’s obviously forgiven her, and so it goes without saying… that’s true love as well.
Cat and Auralie are a bit more closed off, and they’re not as close to Callie and Sloane, but that doesn’t mean they don’t get along. They all have one interesting thing in common, and it’s that they fell in love with men who worked in The Silo. Cat is an exotic woman with long, dark hair, beautiful brown eyes, and high cheekbones that proclaim some American Indian heritage. She was actually a member of the club until her late husband died. He was apparently an abusive prick, and her man Rand pulled her up by the bootstraps and taught her how to lead a new life. Auralie is the newest to the group, only moving to Wyoming a few weeks ago to permanently be with her man, Logan. She looks all of about eighteen with her porcelain skin, black-as-midnight hair, and innocent blue eyes, but I was surprised to learn she’s actually twenty-six and was a professional con artist prior to meeting Logan.
Yes, they are a fascinating group of women. Every one of them funny and outgoing, although Cat is the most reserved of the group. They made me feel instantly welcomed. With the help of the first two bottles of wine, I told them my story after I put Belle down to bed.
And I didn’t hold anything back except for Kyle being undercover ATF. I’m pretty sure Callie knows though, since Bridger had told Woolf that part, and I don’t think those two hold anything back from each other.
The girls all rallied around me, threatening to castrate Zeke if he came anywhere near me and vowing to kick Kayla’s ass if they ever saw her around town. We then decided to play poker, which was nothing more than an excuse to sit around Bridger’s kitchen table while we gossiped and drank wine. None of us—well, except Sloane—were really into the game, and we were playing with chips and not money anyway.
Cat and Auralie uncork two more bottles of wine and bring them back to the table along with a new bag of potato chips. Cat tops off all our glasses while Callie grabs the bag of chips from Auralie and pours out a pile right onto the table by her poker chips.
“Poker chips and potato chips,” she says with a goofy grin on her face.
Yeah, we’re all slightly tipsy.
Cat and Auralie take their seats again, and we all take a unanimous sip of wine. When the glasses get set back down, Sloane says, “I’m tired of playing poker. You gals suck and it’s no fun.”
“You suck,” Callie mutters as she munches on potato chips.
“I know,” Sloane says with a devilish grin. “Let’s play truth or dare. Maggie can go first. I think you should choose truth, so we can get to know you a little better.”
My head snaps her way, and I narrow my eyes at her as this game sounds dangerous. “Out of curiosity, what would the dare be?”
“Um… you have to text a naked picture of yourself to Bridger, right now,” she says deviously.
“I choose truth then,” I say quickly. No way would I ever do that.
Except… I’d love to have that type of relationship with someone. Fun and flirty that I could sext with. Drive him crazy until he could get home to me. But Bridger is most definitely not fun or flirty.
“Okay, truth,” Sloane says as she rolls her eyes up to the ceiling, pondering a good question. When her gaze comes back to mine, there’s a shimmer there that makes me have no doubt she was a good reporter and would delve to find the truth. I brace for it. “Tell us the truth—are you having sex with Bridger?”
Fuck.
The other girls all lean forward, interested in my answer.
I look around at their faces, all eager with something, but it doesn’t look like the need for gossip. Actually… it looks more like a deep respect for this man with an insatiable thirst to know more about him.
With a sigh, I drop my gaze and fiddle with the stem on my wineglass. “Yes. We’re having sex.”
“I knew it,” Callie says smugly.
“How did you know it?” Cat asks.
“You should have seen the way Bridger fretted over her before he left tonight,” she says. And only Callie would know that because she arrived first and was the only one to see Bridger before he left.
“Oh, tell us the details,” Auralie says. “Because there’s no bigger mystery than Bridger Payne.”
Tell me about it, Auralie.
“Well,” Callie says slyly. “He must have asked her a dozen times if she was okay that he was leaving, even once told her that he’d cancel his plans and stay.”
“He didn’t say it exactly like that,” I mutter.
“He said it in those exact words,” Callie argues. “And when you weren’t looking because you were getting some pizza for Belle to eat, he was eating you up with his eyes.”
“There’s no way—” I mutter.
“Okay, tell us details,” Cat says softly as she leans forward. “Auralie and I haven’t had the pleasure.”
My jaw drops open as my head snaps first to Callie and then to Sloane, who both look at me with flame-red faces. “You two have been with Bridger?”
A furious wave of jealousy crests within me, and I swear I can feel steam coming out of my ears, although I don’t know why. It’s not like I have any true claim on him.
Callie holds up her hands. “Relax, Maggie… it was long before he ever met you and it was in a three-way with Woolf.”
That mollifies me somewhat, but the jealousy still gurgles. My gaze slides to Sloane. “And you?”
Her face goes redder, but she gives me a sheepish grin. “Also long before he met you and I fell in love with Cain. But it… um… was a five-way.”
“A five-way?” I blurt out in astonishment.
I didn’t think it was possible, but her face goes even redder. “Yeah. Me, Cain, Bridger, Logan, and Rand.”
My head swings in the opposite direction, and I stare agog at Cat and Auralie. “Your Logan and Rand?”
Cat smiles understandingly at me. “Long before I ever fell in love with Rand.”
My eyes cut to Auralie, and she admits, “And long before Logan came into my life. But… um… I was sort of with Bridger.”
“Well, hell, Cat,” I say sarcastically, throwing my hands up. “You should just fuck him when he gets home tonight. Then he’d check all five of us women off his list.”
“No way,” Cat says with a vigorous shake of her head. “I’m completely satisfied, thank you.”
“And technically,” Auralie says timidly. “I didn’t fuck him.”
“Well then, what did you do with him?” I ask hesitantly, not really wanting to know the details but asking all the same.
“He… um… sort of used a flogger on me,” she says with her cheeks also turning pink. “And he um… got me off with his fingers.”
I push the chair back from the table to stand up, pick up my full glass of wine, and chug it down. When it’s empty, I set it back on the table, grab the nearest bottle, and fill it back up. I grab it, intent on getting shitfaced drunk, but Sloane reaches over and pulls it toward her—out of my reach.
I glare down at her and then around the table in succession. “This is messed up. And I know messed up. I’ve been held captive in a biker compound for three years, and I’ve seen all sorts of fucked-up shit. But this… you people are all friends and sleeping with each other, and no one seems to be bent out of shape about it.”
“We don’t all sleep with each other now,” Auralie points out. “That was in the past, but I’ll maintain to you… there’s nothing wrong with it if we did decide to do that. As long as everyone is consenting and understands the consequences.”
“We’ve all felt what you’re feeling,” Callie adds on softly. “The jealousy and guilt that comes with sexual freedom and exploring your desires. It’s hard when your heart belongs to someone, but if there’s trust and care, you can explore those freedoms with other people who are within your circle of trust.”
“I’d never share Bridger with anyone,” I say vehemently.
Sloane cocks an eyebrow. “Even if he asked you to? Said it would turn him on? That it would be a special gift if you’d agree to it?”
Would I? Would I give that to Bridger if he asked me? I yearn for a connection so badly with him. What would I do if he came to me and asked me to have a three-way with another man? Or another woman?
Could I do that?
The answer comes to me with utter clarity. Absolutely not.
No way.
“I may have made some poor choices in my life, but I’ve always been loyal to the man I’ve been with,” I say with my chin held high. “I just couldn’t.”
“And that’s a fair statement,” Cat says softly. “But maybe you could try to understand that some couples are so secure within their bond that it’s not a breach of loyalty. It’s actually quite an intimate experience.”
My head hurts from the implications. I sit back down in the chair, actually slumping down. “Do you think Bridger’s going to expect that of me?” I ask in a quiet voice.
A warm hand covers mine, and I look up to see it’s Callie’s. She gives me a confident smile. “I don’t know what’s in Bridger’s head, but I can tell you… each one of the experiences we’ve had with him have come at the request of our men. It wasn’t Bridger’s idea. He was only accommodating his friends’ requests. But what I do know is that Bridger has never shown interest in a woman before in the way he has you. He clearly has feelings for you.”
“I don’t know about that,” I mutter, thinking of the fact he can’t even stand to come inside my body.
“Well, I do,” Callie says firmly. “I know Bridger better than any of you, except maybe you, Maggie. You might actually know him better, but if you think that man isn’t interested in you, you are truly blind to what’s right in front of you.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I say glumly. “He’s made it clear he has limitations, and that what we have now is about all he has to give.”
“I don’t believe that,” Cat says, and I turn to look at her. “I may not have been intimate with Bridger, but I know him quite well. I’ve talked to him a lot, back when my husband was parading me around The Silo as his sex toy on loan to anyone who wanted to fuck me. He’s a good man. I mean, he’s really deep down decent. He is devoted to those he cares about, and I think he’s shown he cares about you based on how he’s helped you. I think people see Bridger as this mystery because he’s intimidating and withdrawn. But I think he probably has the biggest heart out of all of us. He just keeps it locked up for some reason. If I were you, I’d figure out that reason and then how to bust that lock.”
A small flicker of hope burns bright in the center of my chest. “Do you really believe that?”
“I do,” Cat says with an encouraging smile.
“Me too,” Callie says. “He’s an amazing man, but I think you’re an amazing woman. He’s lucky to have you.”
A key rattles in the front door lock. We all freeze as if we’re caught robbing a bank, and then slowly turn toward the door as it opens. Speak of the devil, Bridger walks in with Woolf right on his heels.
“Now there’s the hottest man to ever grace the Teton mountain range,” Callie says in surprised delight as she gets up from the table and saunters over to Woolf.
He puts a hand behind her neck and pulls her in for a slow, hot kiss that makes me yearn for that type of reaction from Bridger when he sees me. As it is, he looks at me sternly, eyes taking in the wine and chips spilled all over the place.
When Woolf lets Callie up for air, she places her hands on his chest and asks, “What are you doing here, babe?”
He nods over to Bridger. “He asked me to come over and take you ladies home. Figured you’d all be too tipsy to drive.”
“But we’re having fun,” Sloane says with a devilish smirk. “Bridger can just haul himself off to bed and us girls will hang out. We can all crash here, right?”
“Wrong,” Bridger says curtly. “Now clear out.”
“Mr. Grumpy Pants,” Callie challenges him, and then bats her eyelashes. “Come on, Bridger. You can party with us. I’ll get you a glass of wine. You can hang out with the girls tonight.”
“The only one I want to hang out with is Maggie,” Bridger says with his eyes narrowed at Sloane. “And I’d like to do it alone, so you ladies get your purses and your half-empty wine bottles and get home to your men.”
Callie snorts but then Woolf is pulling her toward the door. “Come on, girls. Let’s get going.”
Callie jerks away from Woolf, and says, “Wait a minute. I need my purse.”
She hurries over to the table where her purse is draped over the back of her chair and leans in to whisper to me excitedly. “He wants to spend alone time with you.”
“Yeah, I got that, Callie,” I say dryly, but I’m not denying the butterflies zooming around my stomach when he said that.
She gives an excited little squeal and gives me a hug. It’s obvious to everyone, including Bridger, that she thinks there’s a love match occurring. While I want to share her enthusiasm, I remember all too well how firmly Bridger sets himself apart from me, unwilling to give himself to me completely.
The girls all grab their purses, stepping up to give me hugs and whispered words of encouragement. Bridger watches all of this with an impassive face. He doesn’t even flinch when Woolf walks by him and punches him in the arm, stating, “Have fun, dude.”
When they’re all cleared out, he locks the door and sets the alarm code.
“Been talking about me, I see,” is all he says when he turns to face me.
I shrug, although my heart is racing. I don’t know if he’s mad or what, but he’s making me incredibly nervous. “Women drink wine, we talk.”
Bridger saunters up to me until we’re standing almost toe to toe. He looks down at me, taking a lock of my hair and rubbing it between his fingers thoughtfully. “And did you learn anything new about me?”
“Only that you’re a seriously complex man who has apparently been with every woman who was just in this house,” I say tartly.
His eyes slide up to mine lazily, and he smirks at me. “Not Cat,” he says without apology about the other women.
“That’s all you have to say about it?” I ask in disbelief.
He drops my hair, but the smirk stays in place. “What do you want me to say, Maggie? Should I apologize to you for every woman I’ve been with before you? Or should you be happy in the knowledge I haven’t been with anyone since you and I were together?”
“No one?” I ask suspiciously, because he did just come from spending several hours in a sex club.
“No one,” he affirms, although he adds on in a move I’m sure is meant to test my resolve to be with him. “Well, I did get my dick sucked by one of my bartenders after Kyle dumped you on my doorstep, but it was before I ever touched you. But if it helps, I was thinking about you the entire time she was getting me off.”
Emotions rage within me. I’m ecstatic he’s not been with anyone since me, but a little put off that he talks about casual sex so… so… casually. It’s just another reminder that he’s so far removed from the intimacy of it that I fear he can’t be reached.
I could argue with him about this, and I could act like a bitter shrew who has lost her footing and doesn’t know where she stands, but it won’t do any good. Bridger is comfortable in who he is and no amount of unease on my part will change that.
So instead, I step into him and put my hands on his hips. In a husky voice, I remind him, “You said something about wanting to be alone with me. What did you have in mind?”
He leans down and gives me a soft kiss before he says, “I’ve got something I want to try with you. Got a little inspiration at The Silo.”
“Whatever you want to try, I’m all in,” I tell him as I flex my fingers into his hips. His eyes flash hot, and then he pulls me toward his room.