Chapter 12
Faith

Faith sauntered onto the front porch, where Alex waited. He’d changed, too, into knee-length board shorts and a tight white T-shirt. She took in his muscled chest and broad shoulders before she glanced away.

“Come here,” he said. “I want to show you something.”

She followed him wordlessly, aware of the warm summer breeze that whipped around her thighs and stomach. Alex walked ahead of her but not at that lightning-fast clip he normally took. Still, Faith hung back and admired the span of his back. He’d hoisted a small red backpack over his shoulders. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but there was something about him that was addictively intriguing.

“So,” she said as she approached his side. “What was it like growing up here? I can’t even imagine.”

“Oh?” he asked, though he didn’t look at her. “I thought all these memories were comin’ back to you. But sounds like it wasn’t exciting enough for you to remember much.”

She faltered. “That’s not what I meant when I said that,” she said. “About forgetting about summers on Saint Rose. I mean, I was just a kid. I don’t really remember kindergarten, either. Honestly? I’m kind of jealous, if you want to know the truth.”

“Jealous?”

She shrugged. “I grew up in Southern California. We had beaches, obviously, but not like this. They were super crowded, unless you wanted to get up at five in the morning. And even then, there were countless surfers who had the same idea.”

“You surf?” he asked, surprised.

“No,” she blushed. “My cousins who I grew up with did. Still do, actually.”

“Oh. Well, a childhood on Saint Rose is great for learning about nature. But it was hard being so far away from everyone else.”

“I guess the grass is always greener,” she said. What she really wanted to ask was who “everyone else” was.

“What about you?” he asked.

She nearly tripped in surprise. Is he really asking about me for a change? “Not much to tell,” she said carefully. “It’s a pretty cliché California story. When I was really young, we lived in Los Angeles. My mom was an actress—”

“Have I seen her in anything?” he asked.

“Probably not. She died when I was a baby. I don’t even remember her, and the movies she was in were mostly really small parts or made for television type of things.”

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“It’s okay, it was a long time ago,” she said. “She gave up acting when she got pregnant with me—well, gave up acting and drinking, or so I was told.”

“Did she . . .”

“She was an alcoholic,” Faith said simply. “That’s not exactly the word my dad used, but it was obvious. Any money she made with her acting, it went to lavish parties and expensive liquor.”

“And what about your dad?” Alex asked. They’d reached a small cliff where the tall grass tickled their bare legs and the view of the water was magical.

“He worked a lot,” she said. “Attorney. I guess that’s why I went into law, too. He was pretty distant, like a lot of men from his generation were. And I don’t know. It’s hard to say how much of it was because of my mom. A lot of people tell me I look just like her.”

“Well. At least you had a father,” he said.

It stung when he said that, like it all circled back to Alex no matter what. “I guess that’s true,” she admitted. “Though, him dying when I was a teenager wasn’t exactly easy. Sometimes . . . God, this sounds bad, but sometimes I kind of wish I’d never known him, either. So you know some of my darkest secrets. Tell me one of yours.”

“Like what?” he asked. She couldn’t read his eyes through the sunglasses perched on his aquiline nose.

“Like what’s the deal with you and Lee?”

Alex was quiet so long she thought he planned to ignore her entirely. “Lee and I were best friends. For a long time, all through childhood.”

“Yeah, I gathered that. And then?” she asked as she navigated around an abandoned sandcastle.

“And then I found out he was in love with my wife.”

“I’m sorry.” Now it was her turn to apologize, though it sounded fake. The shock reached all the way to her marrow.

Alex sighed. “I didn’t know until after Rebecca died,” he said. “And it’s not like Lee ever said it to me. They didn’t have an affair or anything. But I could tell, you know? That he was into her. And then, afterward, it just became obvious. And I started thinking about all these little times when I saw Lee sit up straighter when she walked in. I think she was oblivious. But Lee . . . he still blames me for it.”

Faith’s breath caught in her throat. Blames him? What happened? But she didn’t want to push.

“I mean, hell, I can’t blame Lee for that. For him thinking it’s my fault, at least.” Alex walked on in silence for a few more feet. “I blame myself, too. That night. Christ, I should have stopped her. I knew she’d been drinking.”

She wanted to thank him for trusting her with this, but the shock at the revelation stole her words. Divorce, sure, she’d assumed that. She’d never thought his wife had died.

Faith searched for something to say, the right thing to say. “Get undressed,” Alex said suddenly. He shrugged the backpack off and pulled off his shirt.

She was shocked at the forwardness, but she felt a jolt of excitement shoot through her. As if she couldn’t resist his commands, she hooked her thumbs into her shorts and bikini bottoms—then realized Alex just meant for them to strip to their swimsuits.

Embarrassed, she pulled off just the shorts and shirt. “Here,” he said to her, and held out his hand for her shorts and shirt that were wadded up in her fist.

She suddenly felt too naked, too exposed, in the tiny white bikini. Alex stuffed their clothes into the backpack.

“Come on,” he said, and headed toward the water. She tried not to stare too obviously at his body as he scrambled down the steep sandbank. Faith realized he was wearing rubber-bottomed water shoes, perfect for climbing and handling the beachy terrain. Her own feet felt heavy and waterlogged.

He was already waist-deep in the jewel-colored water by the time she made it to the frothy shore. She bent over and pulled off her shoes. The warm water tickled her feet while the sand pulled at her toes. She was surprised by the warmth of the water, nearly bath temperature though it was before noon.

Alex turned and looked at her. She couldn’t read his expression behind his aviators. “Hurry up!” he said.

With every step, the water licked higher up her legs and reached toward her thighs. When she was an arm’s length from Alex, he held out his hand.

“Come on,” he said. “We can wade all the way there.”

“Wade?” she asked in disbelief.

“It’ll be fine, I promise.”

“Where?” She grabbed his hand and he pulled her to his side. “Where are we going? I thought there was a boat—”

“You’ll have to wait and see,” he said with a grin. Alex pulled the backpack as high onto his shoulders as he could with one hand, but didn’t let go of his grip on her.

Faith was stunned by him. He was almost playful. It was a side she hadn’t seen before.

As they splashed onward, she was surprised that the depths of the water seemed to have stabilized. They were no longer going deeper into the water but seemed to be on a level surface that led them into the unknown. “Ready?” Alex asked.

She didn’t know how to answer and couldn’t have responded if she’d wanted to. Suddenly, the sand took a dip and the water was at her chest. She gasped and he let out a laugh. Faith looked up at him and the blazing white smile that spread across his face. He was gleeful, in his element, and the beauty of it stole her voice.

As quickly as the sand had deepened, it began to rise. The land started to slope upward again, and the water was back at her hips. She was aware of the wet swimsuit fabric that clung to her chest, and how her nipples had hardened in response to the wetness followed by the breeze. Faith glanced down to see just how transparent the suit had become. That was one thing I didn’t check on in the Neiman Marcus dressing room! But she couldn’t tell.

Alex led her onto dry ground. “A sandbar!” she exclaimed. It was a big one, too, nearly a tiny island. Faith laughed. She hadn’t known what to expect, but certainly not this. “How do you know about this?” she asked.

He smiled at her. “I know all the island’s secrets,” he said. “Actually, this has been my spot since I was a kid. I’ve never seen anyone else here.”

She marveled at the secret spot. It looked completely untouched by humans. At the water’s edge, perfect sand dollars and gorgeous shells peppered the white sand.

Alex let the backpack slip off and pulled out bottled water and sunblock. “Here,” he said as he tossed the sunblock toward her. “I didn’t want to have you do this until we were out of the water.”

She stole glances at him while she rubbed the lotion up her calves and along the span of her hips. Faith covered her belly, chest, and arms in the thick SPF and handed it back to Alex.

“Hey,” he said as he finished coating himself in the lotion. “Get my back?”

She bit her lip as she began to work his back. He was warm, wet, and the feel of his muscles beneath her hands was almost too much to bear. Faith finished in a hurry so she wouldn’t be tempted to drool too much.

“Thank you, ma’am,” he said. “Want me to do you?”

A flurry of flirtatious comebacks came to her, but she simply turned her back instead and tucked stray strands of hair into the knot.

She closed her eyes as he began to work the lotion into her back. Alex started at her shoulders and slid a finger underneath the strip of her halter top. He worked his way down, across her shoulder blades. She let out a moan as he hit a tense muscle in her lower back.

Alex paused, and a flicker of embarrassment washed over her. She expected him to stop, but instead he did it again, deeper. She moaned again, and the rest of her body started to respond.

His touch didn’t just release that tight muscle in her back. It started a fire throughout her entire body. Damn, she thought. She could drift away, let this man touch her all over like he was touching her right now.

His thumbs expertly glided across her lower back as he worked out the kinks. Faith’s breasts tightened, and she felt her nipples pebble. She sucked in her breath, head bowed, and could see her nipples as they responded to him.

A warm wetness began to spread between her legs. Normally she’d get flustered. She shouldn’t be getting turned on right now, but how Alex touched her . . . it had been so long.

She arched her back and pushed back against him. Faith could hear his breath right behind her. His shadow fell over her.

He stopped rubbing her back so suddenly that she nearly fell backward. Alex stood up and waded into the water alone. He tried to play it cool, like it was natural, but the awkwardness was obvious.

Faith watched him, aware that the tiny window of time to let seduction take over was rapidly closing. If only I were bold enough, she thought. She had been before, with other men. But that was different. It was clear they’d wanted her, and she’d been equipped with liquid courage. Seduction was easy in the dim lights of a big-city bar. But here? On this secret sandbar with a man she sometimes felt hated her? The risk of getting embarrassed or worse, turned down, was too much.

What is wrong with me? she asked herself as she watched him dip below the water. When he came back up, the seawater glistened on his back. Getting all turned on when he was just putting sunblock on me? Rubbing my back because it was tight?

Alex didn’t look at her and certainly didn’t ask her to join him. I’m reading way too much into this. The guy seriously just told me about his best friend being in love with his dead wife!

She leaned back on her elbows and let the sun soak into her skin. Alex didn’t even want to take me out here. His mom made him.

Faith looked toward the horizon and tried to enjoy the natural beauty. Here she was, squarely in paradise, and all she could think about was how horny she was. And Natalie was probably right, anyway. She did always go after the men who made her wonder if they even liked her. The moody, brooding type, and Alex certainly fit that description.

He swam lazily in the water and didn’t look at her once. Although Faith willed the swell between her thighs to go away, it was a slow process. Her nipples were still hard, too, though she could blame that on the breeze.

Alex must have thought she was totally crazy. Either that, or a complete nymphomaniac. She could blame the other night on the whiskey. But today? That was all on her.

As she watched him dive into the water again, she tried to think about anything except how he looked without a shirt. How the water trickled off his perfectly sculpted muscles. How he seemed to know exactly how to touch her and could turn her on without even coming close to where she wanted him to touch her.