My body felt like it was floating, drifting deeper and deeper with no end in sight. One would feel afraid of the endless downward motion, but I wasn't. It was almost comforting as I was engulfed in a level of equilibrium that I hadn't experienced in years. I was safe, healthy, and I could feel a flame that burned with might within myself.
That essence of burning power told me I had so much to offer. Throughout my life, whether it was in my childhood or during the many lonely nights to myself in adulthood, I wondered if my purpose would ever be fulfilled.
Did I have a reason for living?
Would I contribute to this world like everyone else?
If I did have a purpose, what was it?
What path would lead me to the future I was meant to experience?
The questions were endless, worded in various ways to help my mind not question the exact same topic I always wondered about.
Now that I was here in this place, I realized my purpose must have been great because the flame inside me was strong and wouldn't die anytime soon.
"You understand your worth, my child?"
My eyes opened at a slow pace, my body still in a calm state, which made it a tad harder to stay awake. I was left in awe at my surroundings, and I reached up to see if I could touch one of the millions of stars around me.
I was floating in a multi-colored sky, the colors shifting from navy blue, purple, pink, and gold. The white stars sparkled brightly, illuminating the clear sky that continued to surround me as I fell.
Below me was what really made my eyes grow wide in disbelief. A beautiful city was at the bottom, but as much as I tried to concentrate on the millions of lights, I couldn't make out exactly what this place was.
Is it a city? A place that is on earth? Or is this where the palace of Fantasia was, and I was given a glimpse of its wholeness.
A melodic laugh echoed around me, and I realized I'd never answered the voice who questioned me, to begin with.
"My worth… I know I have lots to do," I answered. "I'm sorry for not responding. It’s just..." I trailed off and looked below once more. It's so beautiful.
The beauty was far from just mesmerizing; it was tear-inducing beauty that put anything I've seen till this moment to shame and contributed to the droplets of water that escaped my eyes and drifted upward into the starry sky.
"Beautiful, isn't it?"
I nodded and continued to cry, before looking back up to the sky above. My tears weren't only because of the beauty that surrounded me.
The acknowledgment this voice of power gave me, made me feel like I was on a different level of importance. Her voice was full of compassion, and I didn't think twice when I accepted that she truly cared about my existence.
She cared about me and it hurt that I was only now hearing her voice. I didn't need to see her image. It was as if I already had a vision of her in my mind that helped me define her as my creator.
It was like how those who worshipped the Almighty didn't necessarily have a face to go with the title, but they still gave Him their devotion and love as they allowed Him to guide them on the path called life.
This was no different, and I couldn't be more thankful to hear her voice and be in her presence.
"For so long, I've wanted to know why I continued to breathe every day. I knew I didn't belong. Not around the people who I called family, or the friends that I tried desperately to please and comfort when they needed me. I longed to fit in. So, so long… but nothing seemed satisfying enough. I kept pushing and pushing, trying harder to please the people around me. It was almost suffocating, but I didn't want to stop because if I stopped, I would have to start from square one again."
I had no idea why I was venting all of this out, but it felt right and good to be able to voice everything that had burdened me for years to someone who finally wanted to listen. Someone who wasn't busy with their job or daily life. I knew this being would absorb every word I said, and in return, give me the advice I'd need to carry on.
"I tried. I really did… yet it was all for nothing." I choked, remembering those 7 days that had passed in a blink of an eye.
"It hurt to see your hard work to be loved and accepted be thrown away."
"Yes! It hurt! It felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest, as everyone acted like I didn't matter. No one searched for my remains? No one tried texting or calling me. No one even tried to find Snix! It was like my very life was brushed under the rug and everyone I'd worked so hard to please, accepted it. They didn't remember all the times I would help them do those last stacks of reports so that they could go to a party or event. They didn't recall the girl who stayed up all night and picked up the slack for the team while they went out to drink and de-stress. The people I called family went on live television and CRIED like I was worth it to them, and yet… they didn't even look to find even a bone? People I would slave away for, in return, wrote a simple RIP note on my Facebook wall and moved on."
The sky shifted colors from its calming cool shades to a warmer tone of gold, orange, and red. Even the environment felt my pain and anger, and I fed it everything that lingered in my heart.
"The man I loved… or thought I loved, gave me up for someone better. I thought I was doing my part as a good fiancé. I thought those years of being the best girlfriend I could be was enough for his love. I didn't ask for much. I didn't need him to give me the world or buy fancy jewelry or clothes. I simply wanted a man who could love me. I needed someone who could give me a part of them that was just for me to love back and cherish. Was it wrong for me to love so blindly? Was it silly for me to ignore when he stayed out longer than expected, or never texted me for days at a time? I trusted him… and he betrayed me without a hint of regret."
"Do you believe all men are such?"
"No..." I whispered, and a small smile formed on my lips at the thought of the four Jinns that came to my aid.
"On the 7th day that I laid alone in my bedroom, I wanted to give up. Cradling my grandmother's lamp was the only comfort I had left. Did I expect four men to appear to my aid? Nope… but, poof! In the weakest state I've ever experienced since I was eight, they were there. They could have abandoned me or, better yet, mocked me for being a fool and letting the world eat a piece of me. Instead, they helped me."
My smile widened, and the sky grew bright with all the colors from the rainbow.
"Even with them being confused about the situation, they helped me. They held me when I smelled so bad the stench must have been uncomfortable to endure. They bathed me and detangled my hair. They made sure I had something to eat, and they even talked to me. They acknowledged the existence I thought had vanished from this world. I'd wholeheartedly accepted that no one wanted me anymore, and they ignited the hope I thought I’d lost. I barely know them… and yet, I want to know so much more. I want to be alive. I want to explore this new world and find my place in the beauty I see around me. I want to enjoy this world those men were willing to lead me to, and maybe I can return the favor somehow? I don't really know."
My body slowly came to a stop and the stars began to swirl around me. My eyes grew wide as an outlined image of a woman's face formed and looked down at me with kindness.
"Destiny Alexa Jinn. A child created within my sanctuary of Fantasia. You are so special, a soul that was far too bright to stay in this world. When a star shines too brightly, there will always be another star doing everything in their power to be better, and such unnecessary rivalry leads to destructive paths that can lead to hurt. Your separation from your birthplace was necessary, but with time and understanding, it will come together, and you will understand."
"It wasn't because I didn't belong?" I asked hesitantly. Her love was too strong, and it made me question if I really was supposed to remain here.
"Fantasia, my universe, is where you belong, Destiny. It is your foundation and a place you may one day call home. Everyone's paths are different, some more difficult than others. As hard as it may be, do not question the struggles you've experienced throughout your lifetime. They are the reason you've returned home and will be able to boldly carry the power you were destined to hold."
"Do I have a title? And… what do I call you?" I questioned innocently. She already felt like a mother to me, and I deeply wanted to call her just that.
"You may call me whatever you're most comfortable with. As for your title, I will bless you with one."
"Mother," I whispered. "I'd love to call you Mother."
The star outlined image smiled down at me, and I returned her happy expression with my own as tears continued to stream down my cheeks.
"Then Mother will be what you call me."
I couldn't be happier as I waited patiently for my title.
"Being a Jinn has two sides, Destiny. There is a good side of wishes that will bring everlasting joy and satisfaction, and there is a bad side of wishes that cannot be reversed. If you choose to start on this path towards your role as a Jinn, your chosen mentor will help you see both the good and bad sides. Watch them, absorb them, and keep in mind that the decisions and results are the choice of the Wisher and not the Jinn who delivers them. You are the provider of power. You are not the one who decides whether that power is used to save or destroy. Do you understand that, my child?"
"Yes, I understand." I gave a short nod for emphasis. "What if it takes me time to grasp?"
"Time is vital to a Jinn. Giving yourself time to learn and grow will aid in your personal development as a Jinn and help you to see both sides of a situation from a Wisher's experience. There is no race, Destiny. I will unlock half of your power, and with it, you will be given the ability to grant wishes. You will also be granted an ability many people don't have. A skill that only one with your title will be able to carry and execute if you determine it's worth the risk."
"What is that?" I wondered, trying to determine what possible skill would hold such value.
"The power to reverse. I, the Mother of Fantasia and the Jinns within, grant you, Destiny Alexa Jinn, the ability to reverse a wish if the Wisher in question yearns for such change. Once reversed, the Wisher cannot be granted any other wishes and must carry the consequences previously written. This is a gift only you can give and should not be taken for granted by any other Jinn."
My body began to grow warm, and I lifted my hands and saw glowing gold symbols begin to form on my flesh. My legs were doing the same, the markings of dots and zig zags forming on the front side of my legs.
I hadn't realized I was naked, and as I watched the markings grow stronger, gold jewelry formed on my ankles and wrists. Soon a necklace appeared around my neck and a set of bands around my biceps.
Turquoise silk cloth that reminded me of the white robe from before wrapped around my breasts, and another set of blue cloth wrapped around my waist and draped down to one side but was low enough to cover my knees.
My hair was long and glowed; the shift from purple to pink looked permanent. I glanced behind me and noticed an oversized gold circle with different outlined symbols inside it surrounded by a light pink glow that rained down tiny pink sparkles while the circle spun.
I had a strong urge to lift my hands to face each other at chest level, and a gold glowing ball of energy appeared.
As it grew and grew, something began to form, and as the light began to dim, I realized quickly that the item floating in between my hands glowing gold, was a lamp.
It was beautifully detailed, the metallic gold having hints of pink and purple. The bottom of it glowed brightly and tiny bits of its magic floated upward.
The flame that burned inside me never dimmed, and in this state I could feel its presence like never before. It was like having a second heart that burned just like how my heart continued to beat within my chest.
"Destiny the Merciful. You are a Jinn of great kindness and one of second chances. You balance the harsh side of our world, with your strength and forgiving nature. You will be a judge to many wishes to come, but remember you, too, hold the power to bring change to those you deem deserve it. Take pride in your title and do not doubt your merciful nature, because with light there is always darkness, and you are what helps contribute to the balance of this world."
"Thank you," I breathed, suddenly feeling tired. The lamp turned into sand and the sand fell and shifted to little gold particles.
My body felt heavy and I struggled to stay awake.
"Destiny, my child. Your love and patience to help so many individuals has never gone unnoticed. Enjoy this process, learn more about those around you, and live. Take each breath with great satisfaction, and if one has need of me, I'm merely a call away. I will always be watching you and will guide you back to the path your future lies on. Now, sleep and rejuvenate your energy, my child, and may Fantasia show you love and kindness. Sleep well, Destiny the Merciful."
My eyes came to a close and my body began to drift upward to what I hoped was the surface.
Destiny… the Merciful.