Chapter 8
It wasn’t that simple, of course. Kytrima bit back her objections while Nate rescued the little puppy, who was still whining, from the bathroom. The little scrap of a dog glared at both of them, as though she knew that they’d been up to no good.
Or that could have been Kytrima’s guilty conscience.
Still, despite her urgency to find the princess, Kytrima couldn’t find it in her to object when he stopped to fill a bowl of water for the pup, and dish out some food. Letting him have that bit of extra time made her feel a little better at how blithely she’d used him earlier.
When they headed out to the car though, and the older dog started barking, she began to get a little irritated. Why did humans keep dogs as pets anyway? They just seemed to cause a nuisance, all the time.
Nate though, stopped in his tracks. “We can’t leave Luna here.”
“Your brother obviously didn’t stop to consider that.”
As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Kytrima wished she could take them back. They weren’t going to help at all.
Sure enough, Nate turned to her with a frown. “Well, why did he? It’s not like Brad at all. Unless, of course, he was in a hurry. I wonder why he might have been?” Nate raised an eyebrow at his last question, his implication obvious.
His words sparked an uncomfortable feeling of guilt. She wouldn’t expect him to understand why she’d done what she did. How important finding the princess was for her clan. She wished she could explain, but she’d already tied herself up too tightly in the web of lies.
Kytrima shook her head in exasperation. The effect this man had on her was maddening. Why couldn’t they just get on with things? “Go on, get the dog then,” she said gruffly.
But Nate didn’t move. He stared at her, not letting it go that easily. “So what did exactly happen here last night?”
Kytrima hesitated. There was nothing in the story that conflicted with what she’d told him, but still, she was reluctant to explain.
Why did it matter? It didn’t change their goals, or how they were going to achieve them.
Nate was still staring at her. Somehow, she didn’t think he’d accept that as an answer. She heaved a sigh. “I’ll tell you in the car.”
Nate stared at her searchingly for a moment, then nodded. “Here, you take Lily, I’ll get Luna.”
Before Kytrima could object, he’d handed her the bundle of wriggling fur.
The pup gave a squeak. She wasn’t any happier with the situation than Kytrima was. But she had even less choice. So she just curled herself up into a ball and tried to pretend it wasn’t happening.
For some reason, Kytrima felt drawn to the little pup. Perhaps it was her fearful acceptance of the situation. Perhaps it was her abject terror. Either way, Kytrima wished she could help.
“It’s okay,” she told the pup. “I have no intention of hurting you.”
She had no intention of hurting anyone, really. She just needed to find the princess.
A puppy couldn’t possibly understand any of that. Sometimes, Kytrima wasn’t sure she did either. It had been her clan’s goal since before she was born. She just accepted it as hers without questioning it. It just was.
Nate came back with Luna on a lead. The dog wasn’t too happy to come towards Kytrima, barking and digging in her heels and pulling back on the lead.
Kytrima felt bad for her, but there was no way to tell the dog she didn’t mean any harm. Instead, she said, “I’ll get in the car.”
“Thanks,” Nate said, flashing her a smile.
Once Kytrima was out of sight, Nate managed to get Luna into the back of the car. Luckily the car was big enough that there was some distance between them. Even so, Luna whined for several moments, before lying down out of sight and quietening down.
Nate climbed into the driver’s seat next to her and glanced over. “Are you okay with Lily? I can put her in the back if it’s easier.”
Kytrima stared down at the little puppy. To her surprise, the dog had settled, and was curled up on her lap. “She’s fine here,” she said.
It was funny, how acceptance from the dog made her feel happy. Silly really. But the feeling persisted as Nate started the car and pulled out onto the dirt road.
It lasted right up until Nate asked, “So, you were going to tell me what happened last night?”
She’d almost forgotten about her promise, and she certainly wasn’t enthusiastic about the explanation. She’d been stupid, throughout the whole thing. She didn’t want to tell Nate how stupid.
He wouldn’t get it though. He didn’t understand the whole, complex backstory. She barely understood it herself, and she’d grown up with it.
But this wasn’t about him understanding her. She just needed an answer he could live with.
Preferably one that wasn’t too far from the truth…
Why she cared she wasn’t quite game to ask herself. Her stomach kept doing flip flops whenever she looked at him.
She didn’t have time to be feeling like this.
Sleeping with him might have been amazing, but she needed to remember that it wasn’t important. Her goals were. Or her clan’s goals anyway.
Kytrima wasn’t too sure what her own goals were. She’d never looked for anything beyond serving Ultrima, helping him find his princess and live happily ever after. That was the highest honour in her clan.
But if they found this princess, then maybe that would be enough for a while. Maybe she could take a break and try to figure out what all this meant.
Of course, Nate would be long gone then. As soon as he found his brother, he was out of here.
She bit back a sigh.
Nate looked over at her, and Kytrima realised she’d been silent for a long time. “Well, I told you I was looking for the princess, right?”
She was stalling.
Nate looked over at her, and nodded. “But why?”
Of course. Of course that was the question he asked. Not what happened, but why. The one question she wasn’t sure how to explain.
She could just tell him the truth. His mind hadn’t already been poisoned by the Rian dragons. Maybe he’d believe her.
That was what she wanted to do. She was tired of lying. It took so much effort to remember what she’d said all the time.
What had she said, about why she was looking for Lyrian? Something about her needing discipline for meddling in too many human affairs, wasn’t it? Why hadn’t she picked something closer to the truth?
The truth was, her clan hadn’t even known that Lyrian was awake until she’d found out.
They still didn’t, because she hadn’t been back to tell them.
If she died, they never would.
Kytrima gave herself a shake. Where had that come from? She wasn’t going to die, so she’d be able to tell them. Just as soon as she found Lyrian.
And for that, she needed the human’s help.
If only she could figure out what to say. She didn’t want to stray even further from the truth, but she couldn’t see how to bring this back.
“Well, you see, Lyrian… split off from our clan.”
There, that was better. Much better. “She and her brothers felt they knew better than we did.”
Actually, that wasn’t bad. If she could play on the truth…
“They refused to let a dragon mate with his true love. They wanted her to mate another. One that would be ‘good for the clan’.”
Nate glanced over at her then, his face full of sympathy.
Kytrima wasn’t sure why she felt it hard to meet his eyes. This story was the truth. Pretty much anyway. Was she still feeling guilty for her earlier lies? She swallowed and forced herself to look him in the eye, even though it was hard. There, that was better.
She was trying to fix that now. Even if she wasn’t sure why she was bothered.
“There was a big fight,” she continued. “Neither side won.”
“What does this have to do with humans?” Nate interrupted. “Especially with my brother?”
“I’m getting to that bit,” Kytrima insisted.
Nate subsided, and she continued. “The other dragons, who are calling themselves the Rian dragons, have been asleep. We’ve been searching for them, but they’ve been hiding behind humans. In their towns and cities, and in some cases, like with your brother, literally behind them.”
This was much better. She was barely lying at all. “I found Lyrian last night, and was going to take her back to our clan, but she hid behind your brother. She even convinced him to shoot me.”
“Well, I’m guessing he doesn’t know any of this story,” Nate pointed out. “And he’s going to trust Lyrian. They have a history together.”
Obviously they must, for Lyrian to have a baby. Kytrima wondered how that had happened. Did Nate know?
“What sort of history?” she asked.
Nate stared ahead for a minute, but Kytrima suspected he wasn’t really seeing the road. “They met about a year ago,” he said, his voice sounding far away. “I’m not sure what happened, Brad didn’t like to talk about it. But he was pretty taken with her. They must have slept together, then she dumped him. Refused to talk to him. He didn’t understand why at all.”
Kytrima winced. She couldn’t help feeling sorry for Nate’s brother, despite her reluctance. It sounded like he was as much a victim in this as Ultrima had been.
“She was using him,” she said softly. “She wasn’t interested in him at all. She just needed someone to get her energy back.”
“Like you needed me?” Nate shot her a look.
Another bolt of guilt stabbed Kytrima in the belly. It seemed to know exactly where to hit to make her feel as bad as possible. Then it twisted.
“I didn’t lie to you,” she said flatly. “I didn’t tell you that I loved you, or even let you think that. I made it quite clear what I needed.”
Nate looked at her again, his expression curious this time. “No, you didn’t,” he agreed. “But we don’t know that Lyrian didn’t either. Unless you do?”
“Good point,” Kytrima said gruffly. “We don’t know what happened. But obviously your brother thought it meant something more than just sex, since he came back.”
“Yeah, he did.” Nate was silent for a moment. Then he said, “Truth is, if you hadn’t told me what that was all about, and about you being a dragon, I’d be convinced I was in love right now. That felt… it felt like no sex I’ve ever had before. I mean, it’s because you’re a dragon, right? Not..?”
His voice trailed off, and he stared over at her.
His eyes seemed to pierce into her soul.
Could he tell? Did he realise that it didn’t normally feel like that?
Oh, sure, the Mesmer bond increased sexual desire for your bonded partner. It wouldn’t work very well if it didn’t. The whole idea was to have that connection, mental as well as physical. That was how it replenished her power.
But what she felt for Nate wasn’t entirely a product of the Mesmer bond. She’d felt that way before they’d bonded.
And she still felt that way, after the Mesmer bond should have been finished and done.
Kytrima shied away from that thought. Shied away from even considering what it could mean.
“Of course it’s because I’m a dragon,” she said, her voice harsher than she’d intended. She softened it a little before adding, “That’s why we have rules about staying away from humans. It’s easy for them to think that sex with us means more than it does.”
Nate glanced over at her, then back at the road. “So it doesn’t feel like that to you?” His voice was gruff.
The bolt of pain in Kytrima’s heart twisted a little more. “I don’t know,” she admitted, the pain making her a little more honest than she’d intended to be. “You’re the first human I’ve ever slept with.”
Nate glanced over then, and flashed her a smile, but it was a weak imitation of the one’s he’d given her earlier. “So… what’s your verdict?”
Kytrima hesitated.
For some reason, she wanted to tell him the truth. That this was completely different to anything she’d ever felt before. That she was as thrown off balance by it as he obviously was.
But then she’d be using him as much as Lyrian was using his brother.
And she didn’t want to do that.
“I’m sorry,” she said gently. “It was wonderful… but it doesn’t mean anything. I have a mission to do, and you have to find your brother. This isn’t anything more than that.”
She could see his Adam’s apple bob up and down as he swallowed. “Right,” he said finally. “We do.” His voice was all business now, and his matter of fact words twisted painfully at her heart.
But it was the right thing, for both of them, she told herself. They didn’t need a romantic involvement right now. They had more important things to do.
“So, what are you going to do when you find this princess?” Nate asked instead.
Kytrima tried to tell herself she was glad of the change of subject.
Even if she didn’t have an answer to his question.
“I need to take her home to my clan, but she isn’t going to come willingly,” she said. “I could go and get my clan to help, but in the middle of the human town, there isn’t much we can do without revealing our existence and putting many humans at risk.”
She really hadn’t thought this through very well.
But maybe Lyrian had. She’d be safe in the human town. There was nothing Kytrima could do there except watch her. But maybe that was enough.
“Once we find her, I’ll need you to keep an eye on her, while I go and get my clan.”
“What about my brother?” Nate demanded. “I’m not sure if I trust your clan to keep him safe.”
Did that mean he did trust her? Kytrima’s heart warmed a little.
Okay, maybe she had to keep her clan out of this.
But what was she going to do?
“We need to get your brother away from her,” she told him. “You need to convince him that she’s trouble, and he needs to come with you. Then once he’s away, I can call in my clan.”
It wasn’t much of a plan, but it was better than nothing.
Anyway, they had to find them first.