ABBY heard her phone ring after she left her seminar. She pulled it out from her bag. The number was not familiar. She hoped it was Andrew when she answered.

“Hello?”

“Hi Abby. It’s Ruth.”

“Oh, hi Ruth,” Abby answered, slightly disappointed, but hopeful it had not come across in her reply. “How are you doing?”

“Pretty good. How about you?”

“Very well, thanks. How are you settling back in at college?”

“Good. Hey, I was going to ask, do you want to come out to yoga with me sometime?”

“Um, I’ve never done a yoga class,” Abby answered. “I’m not sure…”

“I think you’ll like it. I go to a class near your campus. You’re at UCSF, right?”

“Yes. I’m not sure if yoga’s for me, though.”

“The first class is free,” Ruth continued. “And there’s one this evening at five, if you can come. I thought maybe…maybe we can talk.”

“Talk about what?”

“Stuff…girl stuff, I don’t know.”

“Do you want to come by my place?” Abby asked. “We don’t need a yoga class to talk.”

“Sure, but I still think you’ll really enjoy this class. And we can talk after. Come on, I can use the company.”

Abby was skeptical, and curious about Ruth’s real reason for calling. Still, getting out did sound interesting. “Okay, I’ll come.”

“Awesome!”

“Text me the address and I’ll meet you there.”

“I will. You won’t regret it. I promise. Okay see you soon, Abby!”

Abby hung up and got in her car to head home. She had a few hours before the yoga class started. Getting out was probably a good idea. It helped that Ruth was easy to be around, from what she had learned about her at the cottage. As she drove home, her mind wandered to Andrew again. She wished she could make sense of why he left so suddenly, and why he still had not phoned her back. Maybe he needed more time.

Sighing, she turned into her building parking lot. She walked into her apartment and set her bags down. Her gaze instantly turned to the flowers Andrew had brought her the night before. They looked just as perfect as when he had brought them over. She didn’t need to look inside her fridge. The casserole she had made last night was in there—completely uneaten.

Eventually, the flowers would be gone and the casserole would be eaten or thrown out—more likely the latter, given her lack of appetite. The pain and confusion would last much longer. Tears welled up in her eyes. Yes, getting out of the house, even if it was for yoga, started to sound better and better.

* * *

Abby walked into the yoga studio. She was early. A woman at the front desk took her name and directed her to the change rooms. She changed quickly, then she waited at the studio door for Ruth. There was a class that seemed to be wrapping up before theirs would start. The room alone made her glad she had come out. It had a beautiful view of the ocean. Everyone inside looked so calm as they stretched out on their mats.

Ruth showed up just as students were leaving the class. She was already dressed, and held her own yoga mat over her shoulder.

“Hey Abby,” she greeted her with a hug. “I’m really glad you made it.”

“Hi Ruth. Thanks for the invite.”

“Come on. Let’s go inside. The place gets packed for this class time.”

She showed Abby the stack of yoga mats in the corner of the room, and they set themselves up near one of the windows.

“Do you come down here often?” Abby asked as they waited for the instructor to start.

“Two or three times a week. I’d like to do more, but I’m on the volleyball team as well. There’s only so much room for leisure in between class time, I’m afraid.”

“I hear you.”

The incredibly fit yoga instructor walked to the front of the class and clapped to get started. She turned on some gentle music, and reminded everyone to grab a mat and spread out as much as possible.

“Okay,” the instructor started, “I’d like everyone to take a deep breath. For those who are new, every time you breathe, imagine filling your lungs with so much air, your stomach pushes out. You never want your shoulders moving up and down when you breathe. It means you’re not filling your lungs to capacity.”

Ruth looked over at Abby and nodded.

The instructor continued. “Let’s start with a nice and easy downward dog pose.”

Abby watched and followed slowly. Everyone else snapped at the hips to get into the pose.

“Be sure to arch your back,” the woman called out to the group. “Keep it strong and flat, yet relax and breathe as you deepen into the pose.”

She walked around the room, checking everyone’s form, Abby guessed. She adjusted some students’ positions and went back to the front of the class. She moved through each position in the same way. Except for a handstand at the end, Abby found it easy enough to follow along, and relaxing too. It just wasn’t as enjoyable as running.

Ruth waited outside for Abby to change back to her street clothes when the class was finished.

“So? How did you like it?” Ruth said when Abby exited the change rooms.

“Not bad,” Abby answered.

“There’s a little shop across the street. Want to go have a coffee?”

“Sure. Coffee sounds good.”

“Great.”

They left their cars in the yoga studio parking lot and walked over to the café. Abby inhaled deeply as they walked in, taking in the decadent, exotic coffee scents that filled the air. Yes. Coffee would help her focus when she got back home. She joined the line behind Ruth, recognizing many of the faces from the yoga class in front of her. Some had tucked around tables in groups of two to four. She smiled a little. It seemed counter-intuitive, taking a yoga class to relax, and then filling up with caffeine right afterward.

Ruth stepped up to the counter. The barista was ready to take her order. She turned to Abby to see what she wanted to drink. “It’s on me,” Ruth said, “as I practically forced you to come out, and all.”

“It’s okay. I’m glad I came. And thanks for the coffee. I’ll have a small espresso.”

The barista quickly made their beverages. While they waited, they found at table near a corner window. He brought their drinks over when they were settled.

“Tastes good,” Abby said to Ruth as she had her first sip. “I should come here more often.”

“Yes.”

“So what did you want to talk about, Ruth?” It didn’t make sense waiting too long to get Ruth to open up.

“I had an epiphany, and I wasn’t sure who to talk to about it.”

“What do you mean? What kind of epiphany.”

Ruth put down her cup of coffee and looked Abby right in the eye. “I don’t think we’re all cut out for relationships.”

“Sorry. Come again?”

“I’m not cut out for it. At least I don’t think I am. Not for any of it. Not relationships…or falling in love…or getting married. And definitely not kids.”

“And why would you think that?”

“Darwin.”

“You mean the scientist who came up with the theory of natural selection?”

“No. All this time, I thought I liked Rob, and I think I might like Darwin.”

“I don’t know your friends, honey.”

“He’s not my friend. He’s my dog back home.”

“You like your dog?”

“No. I love my dog.”

Abby let it register. She wasn’t sure she wanted to hear any more of it. “I’m…I’m not sure what to tell you.”

Ruth finally realized what she had said, and raised up her hand. “No…gosh…sorry, I don’t mean it like that. I mean all this time I thought I wanted to be with Rob. And I like him. I really do. But I like being alone more. I like spending time alone, or with my dog. You know what I mean?”

“I don’t think I do, Ruth. Are you sure you don’t want to talk to someone else about this? Perhaps with a close friend? Or a professional?”

“I don’t want to talk to my therapist, Abby. Besides, he’s all the way back in Reno. Maybe this isn’t coming out right.”

Abby stopped short. She was almost too nervous to ask the question. She summoned up a breath of courage and spit it out. “Are you and Rob thinking of not dating?”

“I don’t know…maybe. Maybe I just need time to figure things out. I never planned on him liking me back. He was kind of like… like a fantasy. Someone I could be dreamy-eyed about, and admire from a safe distance. Then we spent that time in Lake Tahoe during the blizzard, and we got closer. And now, I don’t know if I like the fact that he likes me back. Is that weird?”

Abby thought it was weird. Or maybe it was her state of mind from Andrew’s anger, rejection, avoidance, or whatever his reasons were for stepping back. But she knew better than to agree with Ruth.

“I think the best thing you can do right now is talk to Rob about it. Take him out for a coffee, just like we’re doing now. Then take a deep breath, and tell him what you’re feeling.”

Ruth didn’t react for a few moments. She stared down into her coffee, a grimace on her face. “I don’t want to hurt his feelings. I feel like a hypocrite. I was so overt before, so obvious about liking him for so long. Now that he’s finally interested, I’m the one wanting to back away.”

“Maybe you just need time. But you can talk to him about that too. Just be honest with yourself. And then, go and be honest with Rob.”

“You’re probably right.”

Abby smiled and shook her head at Ruth. “Actually, I have no idea. I’m not an expert at love or romance, or even dating. No one is.”

“Patty from that millionaire reality show is.”

“What?”

“An expert. At love and monogamy. Haven’t you seen that show?”

“I don’t watch TV much, Ruth. The point I’m making is this. Only you and Rob can figure this out together.” Abby looked at her watch. “Did you want to talk about something else?”

“Um. Nope.” She looked up from her drink and smiled at Abby. “Thanks for listening.”

“No problem. Thanks for the yoga invite. It was pretty good. I enjoyed getting out. Come on, let’s go. I’ve got some project work to do for school.”