I’m going to throw up. There’s no way I can do this. They’re going to know who I am, everything will go to hell…

“Are you okay?”

I turn to give Clint a winning smile. I’m not alright. I’m dressed in a dress that’s not me; it’s too formal, too revealing, too pretty. “I’m fine,” I lie, watching the dirt road give way to concrete. I felt safe there, at his house.

“They’ll love you,” he says, and suddenly it feels real. This is what a man would say to the love of his life when he took her to meet his parents.

His hand settles on my knee as I stare out the truck window. I can do this. It’s going to hurt, and I need to remind myself it’s not real. But I can do this. Besides, I’ve dreamed about this moment. The real moment, not the fake one. But Clint doesn’t know that.

He never needs to know that.

He’ll hate me when he finds out.

Dread knots in my guts, but the warmth of his hand on my knee sinks into my flesh and curiously seems to combat the ice lining my gut.

I can do this.

* * *

The familiar, ornate door opens and I realize Clint’s parents don’t look like they’ve aged a day. They give us hugs and usher us inside. The whole time I’m silently begging them not to remember me.

It’s been years.

The men drift off and I find myself left alone with Barbra. Babs, as I remember her. She takes my hand and examines the ring on my hand.

“It’s beautiful,” she says, looking up at me. “So how have you been, Sara?”

My heart sinks to my toes. “I go by May now,” I say, needing to weave some quick damage control.

“So I heard.” Her brown eyes are sharp as she studies me. “What are you doing, exactly?”

I struggle to breathe. “I’ve… always loved Clint,” I say, realizing it’s not a total lie. Even now, the words feel right as I say them. They feel real. And I know that my deception has ruined any chance of them ever coming to fruition.

Babs is quiet a minute, studying my face like she’s seeking answers to questions she hasn’t asked. “Perhaps he loved you as well,” she says gently and I feel tears stinging in my eyes.

“There, there,” She says, pulling me into a hug. “The heart wants what it wants. I’m not sure I approve of your method, but you’re here and that’s all there is to it.”

“Please don’t tell him,” I whisper, needing to know she’s in my corner.

She pulls back to look down at me as if I’ve missed a very vital detail. “Oh, darling, he’s going to find out.”

I shake my head, denying it, though I know she’s right. He’ll find out. I always knew he would. How do I come back from this? Can I fix it? Because even though the engagement is a sham, how is he going to react to the very real lie I’ve told him?

“But I won’t be the reason he finds out,” she says and I smile through my tears.

“Thank you,” I whisper as she wraps an arm around my shoulders and leads me toward the bathroom. When the door closes, she turns to me and cleans up my running mascara.

“Beautiful,” she says, beaming at me and I can’t help but laugh.

“I’m a mess,” I say, glancing at my reflection. It’s true. My nose and cheeks are red and my eyes are clearly watery. Babs takes my chin and turns my face so I’m looking at her.

“You look like a girl in love,” she says gently. “It’s not always ups. There are downs and how you get through those defines you; not your best moments.”

I pull her into a hug, realizing that she’s right. How Clint deals with finding out who I am will define him. And it’ll also be the reason I stay… or the reason I run away. Again.

“Let’s get out to dinner, shall we?” Babs says and I stop her.

The lie, the farce is too much. “Why is Flint doing this?” I need to know the reason why Clint needs to be married to take his place as his father’s son. I know Clint doesn’t need the money. He just wants to be recognized on his merits, which seem to outweigh the list his father requires.

“Clint’s father is…” Babs stares off into space as if seeking an answer, “he’s worried Clint never worked hard enough for things. Money is easy to come by. Even women are easy to come by,” she gives me an apologetic smile, but I know she’s referring to the kind of girls who flock to men with money. “But a wife? A family? He needs that balance to show he’s willing to work for something real.”