Chapter Twelve
Summer appreciated the fact that she’d be opening for Jade, although she would have liked to have achieved her goal with a lot less angst and drama. At first she’d kept looking over at Ben, hoping to convey that she hated that she’d had to cut their conversation short. She didn’t even know what, exactly, she wanted to say to him, but she wasn’t ready to lose him just because his assignment had come to an abrupt end.
When she glanced over again and realized he had left, her stomach pitched in disappointment and frustration. Still, she had no choice but to devote all her energy and focus on Jade. They made their way to the star’s private suite, which was a massive set of rooms, punctuated by a large living area filled with flowers and a baby grand piano as the centerpiece.
Jade had been set to choose Summer, anyway, and she went on to explain that in addition to her own personal preference, that Ourstage.com, an site that allowed fans to choose their favorite act, had skewed heavily for Summer, as well.
The rest of the evening passed in a blur of conversation and planning among Summer, Jade, and their agents, and a lavish meal ordered by Jade, and by the time Summer returned to her room, she was ready to pass out from exhaustion. Her adrenaline rush was gone, and when she entered the empty room, she realized immediately that so was Ben.
Over the course of the evening, she hadn’t had time to even look at her phone. Now that she did, she saw that Ben had left her a text.
You deserve every bit of this success. Go live your dream. Love, Ben.
She reread his closing words, Love, Ben, trying to decide whether or not to read more into it than mere words. And even if he meant them in the truest sense, did it change anything? She’d achieved her biggest dream, and yet she was alone in a Midtown hotel room.
He hadn’t waited around and she didn’t blame him. If she had no time for him after today’s mess of events, how would she have time when she left on a world tour? She didn’t see any way to make a relationship between them work that was fair to Ben. And it was that thought that kept her from going after him.
* * *
Ben returned to the office, feeling out of sorts. A weekend alone in his apartment did nothing to improve the mood he’d been in since leaving Summer behind.
He walked into the main area, where Tara Hayes, the receptionist for Alpha Security, sat at her desk. Tara was in her mid-forties, an attractive woman who always dressed appropriately regardless of everyone else being office casual. Today her hair was pulled into a bun, and she dressed in a white buttoned-up top and a black skirt.
“Good morning,” she said, a smile on her face.
“Morning. Everything good?” he asked, trying his best to be cheerful and not punish the world because he was miserable.
“Things are running like clockwork around here, which makes me happy, as you know.”
Ben nodded, knowing Tara kept Dan organized and the office running smoothly. “You’re Dan’s right hand. We all appreciate everything you do.”
“Aww, thank you.” She blushed at the compliment. “I like to feel part of the team.”
“Ben! My office. Now.” Dan stood outside his door and gestured for Ben to join him.
“The boss bellows,” Tara said, laughing.
Ben went around Tara’s desk and strode into Dan’s office. His boss had sat back down in his oversized chair. “I thought you could use a debrief.” Dan eyed him with concern. “In other words, I want to know if you’re okay. I caught the entertainment news this weekend.”
“Yeah, so did I,” Ben muttered.
Although he wasn’t normally a gossip show watcher, the masochist in him had put on nightly shows anyway, hoping to see how they were covering Jade Glow and her new opening act. He’d seen full treatments on Michael Gold’s arrest, Tawny’s questioning by the police, and of course, Jade’s official announcement choosing Summer as her opening act.
Summer glowed, standing beside Jade, exuding pride and excitement, and he couldn’t be happier for her.
Even if it meant he’d lost her.
“You let her go?” Dan asked.
“What was I supposed to do? Ask her to put her dreams on hold?” Not that he hadn’t been tempted. He just wasn’t that much of an asshole.
Dan shook his head, spinning a pen between his palms. “I know I didn’t raise you, but I still like to think I had enough time with you to instill a few things in that thick skull of yours.”
Ben swallowed hard. “I know you lost Katherine,” he said of Dan’s wife. “But—”
“But nothing. Life is too fucking short. You grab on to happiness while you can. Isn’t that what I try to teach all of you?”
“I understand where you’re coming from, and I respect it, but really, she’s worked her whole life for this opportunity.”
Dan rolled his eyes. “I’m not suggesting you ask her to give it up. Let me ask you something. What do you do for a living?” He folded his arms across his chest and eyed Ben through narrowed lids.
Ben tipped his head. “I’m a bodyguard, obviously.” What the fuck was the man getting at? Ben wondered.
“And what does a pop star need when she travels? A full-time bodyguard,” Dan spelled out for him, a grin on his face.
“Son of a bitch,” Ben muttered, the solution so simple he was shocked he hadn’t figured it out for himself. He glanced at his boss, awe and admiration filling him. “You’re willing to lose me?”
“Well, hell, son. I received a call from the company that hired us in the first place. They want to keep you on as Summer’s security detail. It seems Jade Glow took a liking to your girl and wants to keep her safe.”
Ben blinked in surprise.
“I’d call that a win-win, for you and for Alpha Security,” he said somewhat smugly. “Works for me. Can I tell them you accept the job?”
“Of course,” Ben said, his head spinning at the one-eighty he’d done since walking into this office. He only wanted Summer to be happy and follow her dream, never thinking he could be part of it.
Ben walked toward Dan, who rose from his seat. “I don’t know how to thank you for getting my head on straight,” he said to the man who, in the short time he’d worked for him, was often more like a father than his own parent had been.
Dan placed an arm around his shoulders. “Nothing gives me greater pleasure than seeing all of you happy. I just wish the others would follow suit.”
Who’d have thought Dan was a matchmaker at heart? “You know I wish the same for you.” Ben patted Dan on the back.
Dan met his gaze, his expression serious and sad. “I had my time. It ended too soon, but I couldn’t ask for better than the life I had with Katherine.” His eyes glazed at the memory of the wife he loved so much. “That’s why I’m willing to let one of my best men take a job that will send him to the other side of the world for half the year. Because you love that girl. I could tell by watching you two together.”
Ben thought back to the time he’d brought Summer to Dan’s house for his birthday. “That was very early in our relationship.”
Which, he knew, had formed within the bubble of both a condensed time frame and close living quarters. But he didn’t think that lessened what they felt for each other, but heightened their emotions instead. He loved her, probably had for a lot longer than he’d wanted to admit. He’d been fighting his past and himself.
“I’m pretty schooled in reading people. Now are you going to go get your girl?” Dan asked.
“Hell yes.” Ben was planning to offer her everything he had. Which wasn’t much considering where she was headed in her career, but he was discovering that he was a romantic at heart.
He loved her. Everything else would fall into place. He’d accept nothing less, he thought, his anticipation heightened at the thought of being with Summer with no barriers between them, and his heart on the line.
* * *
Having achieved her dream, Summer should be on top of the world. Instead she was sitting with a tub of cookie dough ice cream in front of her, a glass of white wine on the table beside her, and her best friend, who’d dropped everything to commiserate with her, sitting across the way.
She dug into the creamy dessert and savored the cookie crunch. “I promised myself this one night to mourn what might have been, and then I’m throwing myself into getting ready for the tour. No tears after tonight.” She placed the ice cream down on the table and lifted the glass of wine. “To the man I love and can’t have.”
Ivy shook her head, clearly not happy with how Summer was handling her life. “Honey, if you love him, you need to tell him.”
Summer bit down on her lower lip. “I would but telling him isn’t fair to him. What would I say? I love you but I’m leaving anyway? See you in six months? Or longer?”
“Exactly,” Ivy said on a nod. “If he loves you, he’ll wait.” She took a sip of her wine, then asked, “Does he? Love you, I mean?”
Their past flashed before her eyes. The laughter, the fun at the carnival, the sensual looks… And at the end, there was that text… Love, Ben, he’d said. Had that been a generic sign-off? Or a real expression from the heart?
His words when he’d been lost inside her, calling out, mine. Mine. She trembled at the memory that had made her feel so cherished, so loved. Just like their last time together, when he’d relaxed her in the hotel room, him buried deep inside her, rocking against her, taking her to completion in such a tender … and, again, loving way.
“I think he loves me,” she whispered. “And I know for a fact that I love him.”
And yet she’d ignored him that last day. Then she hadn’t answered his text because she didn’t know what to say… Thanks for being my bodyguard? Have a nice life? I’ll miss you?
So she’d let the rest of the weekend go by but … she loved him. “I need to talk to him. He needs to know how I feel.”
Ivy grinned. “See? You didn’t need me here at all,” she said, laughing. “You just needed a good self-talking-to.”
“Where’s my phone?” Summer asked as a knock sounded at her door.
“I’ve got it.” Ivy jumped up to see who was there, looking into the peephole. “Oh my God! It’s him!”
Summer rose from her seat, running a shaking hand over her ice-cream-stained top “Look at me!”
Her hair was pulled into a messy bun on top of her head. She had no makeup on, and her eyes were puffy from the occasional tears she’d shed over Ben. And her clothes? Not only were they stained but her soft cotton shorts and old tee shirt were threadbare—because she hadn’t cared what she wore to wallow over losing Ben.
He pounded on the door again.
“No time to change,” Ivy said, laughing but showing her no pity as she unlocked the door and let Ben inside. “Hi, bodyguard,” she said.
“Hi, Ivy. Summer here?”
She cleared her throat.
He stepped past Ivy, looking determined and oh so sexy. He met her gaze, his expression softening as he took her in.
“Hi,” she whispered. Despite all the heavy emotions flowing through her, most of all certainty about how strongly she loved him, she was suddenly uncertain of how to approach him.
In the wake of the silence as they stared at each other, Ivy gathered her bag from the couch. “And I’ll take this as my cue to leave,” she said, making her way to the door.
“Bye, Ivy,” Summer said, her stare never leaving Ben.
“Text me later. I want details,” she said, not ashamed to be blunt.
“Good-bye!” Summer said, shaking her head over her friend.
Ivy closed the door as she left, leaving Summer alone with Ben.
“I wasn’t expecting you.” She tried not to feel self-conscious about her messy appearance as she gestured for him to come farther inside.
“I couldn’t let another minute go by.” He strode up to her, grasping her face between his hands and staring into her eyes. “I love you, Summer.”
Her heart skipped a beat at his words. “You what?” she asked, blinking up at him. She knew she’d heard him right, but she definitely needed to hear him say it again.
A sweet, sexy smile lifted his lips. “I love you, Summer. Need me to say it again?”
She shook her head, tears of joy filling her eyes and happiness clogging her throat. “I love you, too,” she said, but in her heart, she knew their problems weren’t solved just because they’d admitted their feelings. “But what about—”
He cut her words off, sealing his lips over hers instead. In his kiss, in the reverent way his mouth moved over hers, his thumb caressing the side of her face, she felt the love he’d expressed in those three simple words that meant so much.
It hadn’t been long since she’d seen him last, but she’d missed him, probably more so because she believed their separation was permanent. At the thought, she wound her arms around his neck and pressed into him, needing to get as close as possible. Her breasts crushed against his chest, and she soaked in his purely masculine scent.
He groaned and slid his tongue into her mouth, uniting them as their bodies meshed and their hips ground together. He dropped his hands from her face, his fingers gliding through her hair. He tipped her head, holding her in place while he kissed her senseless, and she lost herself in everything that was Ben, and all she could think about was the fact that he was here, he loved her, and … she was leaving soon.
She pulled back, leaning her head so she could meet his gaze. “What are we going to do about the long-distance issue? I can’t get back here while on tour, and if you’re on a case, you definitely can’t come to me.”
Pain filled her at the thought, but a pleased look danced across his face, giving her hope he’d thought of a solution she hadn’t. “What is it?” she asked.
“You’re looking at your new full-time bodyguard,” he said, grinning. “As in, where you go, I go.”
“Really?” Excitement filled her, but then reality took hold. “Ben, I can’t afford to pay you full time.”
“You have a guardian angel,” he said, kissing her lips. “Dan got a call from Jade’s people. Apparently, she’s decided to take you under her wing. She feels responsible for setting up the competition and putting you in a position where Michael could try and undermine you. She and her team want your security covered.”
She let his news sink in, Jade’s generosity and the fact that she and Ben wouldn’t be separated after all. “Oh my God! That’s incredible. You’re coming with me?” She squealed in excitement. “You’re really coming with me! It’s like all my dreams wrapped up in one huge, lucky, unbelievable package. I don’t know how to thank her.”
“You’ll find a way,” he said, a smile on his face. “But you have to know something. Even if the opportunity hadn’t come up, after talking to Dan today about life being short and knowing how he lost the love of his life to cancer … I’d have found a way to make it work. To make us work.”
She bit down on her lower lip to stop its quivering. “I was talking to Ivy before you came in. And I was going to tell you the same thing. I didn’t have a solution, but I knew that I loved you.” She grasped on to his shoulders. “And I didn’t want to lose you.”
“And you never will.” Love and so much emotion flashed across his handsome face. “You’re going to conquer the world, Summer Michelle. And I’m going to be by your side when you do. Because nobody but me is going to guard this body,” he said, his hands grazing down her sides, over her breasts, her nipples tightening at the slightest tease of his touch.
“You can start right now.” She grasped his hand and pulled him toward the bedroom, her heart light, her spirits high, her sense of gratitude soaring.
She had the career she’d worked so hard for with the man she loved by her side. She couldn’t ask for anything more.