Chapter Four
Ben told himself that the earlier kiss had been the result of Summer’s adrenaline rush and nothing more. He wasn’t sure he believed it, not given how quickly it had escalated, how good her lush body felt in his arms, and how hard he was for her even now, hours later. But he had no choice but to push forward and do his job, and that meant pretending the kiss had never happened. Which wasn’t easy when he was in Summer’s orbit, surrounded by her soft scent and the driving need he had to do more than just kiss her.
The women were talking to each other in the small kitchen area. Despite having the television on, he’d just heard the story of Ivy and her last date, something he wished he could un-hear.
“You’ll never guess who I ran into at Starbucks,” Ivy said, her voice louder with each successive glass of wine.
“Who?”
“Your ex, Ryan.”
“Really? How does he look?” Summer asked.
If he was an ex, why did Summer care how this Ryan guy looked? he thought with an irritable frown.
“His hair grew and he has a beard. He looked good.”
“Too bad he sucked in bed,” Summer said, ending that sentence on a giggle that had to be the result of too much wine.
Jesus. The last vision he wanted was one of Summer naked and in bed with some guy named Ryan. Or any guy, for that matter, whether or not he was bad in the sack. Ben wished he had the luxury of drinking like the women were, but he didn’t indulge while on the job.
“He did say to tell you he’d like to hear from you again.”
Despite himself, Ben cocked his head their way, wanting to hear Summer’s reply.
She shook her head at her friend’s suggestion. “No way. He’s way too uptight. He had to fold his clothes neatly before we ever made it to the bed. Who does that?”
“Not a guy who can’t keep his hands off you, that’s for sure.”
Ben curled his hands into tight fists. This conversation and the subject of Summer’s ex and how he was in bed was giving Ben fits. On the one hand, jealousy ate at him that she’d been with other men, not that he’d been celibate in the time since they were together last. And on the other hand, he was pissed at himself for caring what she’d been up to with other men when he was so determined to keep things between them professional.
Ivy yawned. “I wish I could stay, but I have to meet with a new client in the morning and I’m exhausted.”
“And tipsy,” Summer said. “I know I am. You’re taking an Uber home, right?”
Ivy nodded. “Yep.” She took out her phone and arranged for her ride. “Three minutes away.” She slid her shoes back onto her feet and rose.
“I appreciate you coming by. You know how much it means to me to know you care.” Summer stood and wobbled a bit, the room obviously spinning around her.
A glance at the table told Ben they’d consumed two bottles between them.
She pulled Ivy into a hug. “Thank you.”
“I love you, Summer. You know that.”
“Love you, too.”
Ivy started for the door, then turned back to face Ben. “Bye, bodyguard!”
“Get home safe,” he said, meeting her at the door so he could let her out and lock up behind her.
He turned just as Summer tripped on her own feet, giggled, and righted herself. “Oops.”
He rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t deny she was cute when drunk. “Come on, princess. Bedtime.” He strode around the sofa and grabbed her elbow, pulling her along toward the one room he’d been avoiding since taking this job.
Her bedroom.
The shades were drawn, a small lamp on the nightstand lighting up the room. A white ruffled bedspread with a black heart pillow in the center defined the décor, the furniture also white with black accents, a mix of soft femininity and statement pieces.
“I’m tired.”
“So let’s get you into bed.” He turned his back on her and pulled the comforter down over the mattress so she could climb between the cover and the sheets. When he looked back, she stood in her bra and panties.
She was intoxicated, and it wasn’t appropriate, but he couldn’t tear his gaze away. From her pink-painted toes, up her toned calves and thighs, to the barely there triangle covering her sweet pussy, his gaze lingered before traveling, up and over her stomach and belly button with a small ring attached, to her full breasts, spilling over the lacy cups of her bra.
“I’m ready,” she said, weaving as she walked over to where he stood.
God was testing him, no doubt about it.
“Get in,” he said through clenched teeth as he patted the mattress.
“Make me,” she said in a flirty, teasing voice.
He raised his eyebrows. Really? She was going to push him?
He scooped her into his arms, and while inhaling her sweet scent that made him fucking harder than he already was, he deposited her onto the bed.
She refused to unlink her arms from around his neck and pulled him down on top of her.
She tucked her cheek against his and sighed. “You smell good,” she said, turning and pressing a kiss against his cheek.
She smelled better, and his dick was hard as a rock because of it. He tried to lift himself up but she held on tight.
“It’s no wonder no other guys lived up to you,” she murmured.
Aww, fuck. She was going to kill him.
He wanted nothing more than to rip those tiny panties off her and sink into her wet heat. Short of that, he’d settle for curling himself around her and breathing her in all night long. She threatened his sanity and his common sense. He had the scars from the last time he’d tangled with her and gotten burned. He’d seen the result when his father had gone back for one more chance and paid the price. All solid reasons for him to get the hell out of her bed.
“Come on, princess. Let me up.” He pushed harder and levered himself away from her, breaking her hold on him at last.
No sooner had he turned back than she curled into herself and fell asleep. Ignoring the catch in his chest at the sight of her so vulnerable, he pulled the blanket up and over her body, covering her and tucking her in for the night.
Then he shut off the lamp and headed back to the couch for a cold, lonely night’s sleep.
* * *
Summer awoke to a dull throb inside her head, and it hurt to open her eyes. Her mouth tasted like cotton and she groaned. Too much wine. Her bladder felt full, and she pushed off the covers and realized she was wearing her bra and panties. She never slept in her underwear.
And then she remembered Ben walking her into her room and demanding she get into bed.
Make me, she’d said, taunting him. Teasing him.
So he’d grabbed her and put her into bed, and she’d pulled him down on top of her. “Oh God.” She groaned and put her head in her hands.
Well, it could have been worse. She could have stripped completely. It was the only bright side she could find to what had been a completely embarrassing incident.
She changed into an oversized sleep shirt and headed for the bathroom, where she washed up and brushed her teeth. She pulled her hair into a messy bun and gathered her courage around her before heading into the other room to face Ben.
He stood in the kitchen facing the counter, putting frozen waffles into the toaster oven. A pair of athletic pants rode low on his lean hips. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, and even his back was muscular, tapering into his waistband.
He must have sensed her because he turned. “Good morning.”
“Morning.” She felt a heated blush rise to her cheeks. “Listen, about last night—”
He waved, dismissing her words. “Don’t worry about it. Want some waffles?”
“Sure.” She glanced at the table, surprised to find orange juice already poured for them both. “Thank you.”
“I figured you’d wake up hurting. This was the best I could do. I’m not much of a cook. Not even eggs.”
“Waffles will be fine. I eat them all the time,” she said, touched by his desire to take care of her in some small way.
When the timer went off, he served them both waffles. Maple syrup was on the table, and she realized she was starving. She cut into the waffles, and they ate in silence until they were both finished.
He pushed his plate aside, propped his elbows on the table, and met her gaze. “You were right the other night. It’s time we talked.”
She swallowed hard. “Okay.”
“I should have taken your calls back then, but I was angry, and you were the best candidate to take that anger out on.”
She blew out a long breath. “I don’t blame you, really. You lost your job. But things between us were … intense before they blew up, and when you didn’t take my calls or reply to my texts, that hurt.”
Although they’d had a short period of time together, it had meant something to her. Given how they didn’t have much contact with the outside world during the show, and she’d managed to see him often, her time with Ben had been a whirlwind of intensity.
He wrapped his hand around the glass in front of him. “I know. And I regret how I handled it and wish things had ended differently. But that time in my life taught me not to mix business with pleasure. I need to focus on my job, and that means however difficult it is for us to keep our hands to ourselves now, we have to do it.”
His words closed any hope she might have been holding out for them to try again. She didn’t like it, because she’d been truthful last night when she’d said that no man since had lived up to him. And not just sexually. But she appreciated that he’d spoken to her about things, and she respected both Ben and his work enough to stick to the boundaries he put in place. Even if it did cause a bit of disappointment.
“Don’t worry. I won’t throw myself at you again,” she said, raising her hand in a solemn promise.
A sad smile lifted his lips. “If things were different…” He shook his head. “But they aren’t. I’m going to keep you safe, and when this is over, you’ll be going out into the world as a huge star. You won’t have time to think about me except as someone you once knew before you were famous.”
She shook her head, rose, and gathered their plates, taking them to the sink to clean, unable and unwilling to face him, because he was wrong. She’d think about him as more than someone she’d once known. He was the one who’d gotten away.
* * *
Once Ben laid things out for Summer, things relaxed between them. The tension was no longer thick, and they were able to coexist more easily. But he had a difficult time trusting in Summer’s willingness to move on as friends. For over a year, his mom had never moved on, always keeping his father in her back pocket to fall back on, and his dad had been there … until he’d lost everything. Because Nate had been emotionally invested in his wife.
Summer was right when she said things between them had been intense the first time, and he had been on the verge of falling for her and falling hard. Losing his job in a spectacularly humiliating fashion had brought Ben face-to-face with reality. Getting involved with Summer had been stupid. And if he fell back into a relationship with her again, he could end up no better than his father, abandoned when something bigger came along. And Summer’s bigger was on the horizon.
He had no doubt she’d win this competition and take off into the stratosphere along with Jade Glow and those like her. The stylist had delivered so many clothes she’d had to keep a hanging rack in the corner of her den because her small closet couldn’t hold them all. Everything had been provided by Jade Glow’s public relations team, which was benefitting from every public performance Summer and Tawny made during this time, as Jade’s name was plastered all over the publicity materials and mentioned by every show host who promoted the ongoing competition.
Summer was on her way to making it big, and soon she wouldn’t have time for Ben or the people she’d known along the way. And he didn’t want to be left in the dust. Which meant they were going to have to deal with being platonic while he was guarding her delectable body.
Her schedule was sporadic at best. When she wasn’t in a studio doing voice-overs, which he listened to, in awe of her talent, she spent time at the gym doing hard-core cardio and weights, the workouts giving her the stamina for her performances.
Watching her move in her tight spandex shorts and tank top, her breasts bouncing despite the sports bra, should not have been a hardship except on his body, which desired her more with every passing minute, mocking him and his need to keep things between them simple. Unfortunately he also had to deal with the many guys who hit on her while she was doing her routine. He was forced to watch from the sidelines, glaring at the men who flirted with Summer and who she claimed were just friends.
The woman was oblivious to the desire in those so-called friends’ eyes when they looked at her sexy body and gorgeous face. They were attracted to both the outer packaging and her bubbly, welcoming personality. Eventually, some guy was going to come along at the right time and be the one, and the thought made him want to growl in frustration.
When she didn’t have necessary engagements scheduled, they remained in her apartment because, for safety reasons, he didn’t want her running around the city for no good reason, and he was becoming well acquainted with her sofa while he watched TV.
To her annoyance, he prohibited Starbucks trips unless they were already out of the apartment, and since there was one on the corner of her block, she begged him to go in every time they left the building. Another place where men noticed her constantly.
Her next big event was tomorrow, a nightclub opening, where she and Tawny were performing along with meeting and greeting VIPs. Tonight they were ordering in Chinese food, and he hoped she’d let him pick the movie.
“Laundry time!” Summer walked out of her room, plastic basket in hand. “Dirty clothes need to get clean.”
He rose to his feet, immediately alert because she was going to be leaving the safety of the apartment. “Where are the machines?”
“Down the hall. I’d say I don’t need an escort, but I’m guessing I’m going to have one anyway?” she asked cheekily.
He inclined his head. “Good call.” He patted his holstered weapon and took the basket out of her hands.
“I can carry it. I do it all the time.” She extended her hands, requesting the heavy load back.
“Sorry. As long as I’m here, get used to having help.”
“Thank you.” She grabbed her keys and tossed pods of detergent and fabric softener sheets into the basket. “Let’s get this going,” she said, striding to the door.
“I’ll go first.” He needed to make certain no one was waiting for her to exit her apartment.
A quick check and he escorted her down the hall, leaning against the open doorway, keeping an eye out for anyone who might be heading into the laundry room while she sorted her clothes.
Of course, with his luck, she was pulling out her bras and panties, putting them inside a mesh bag, treating him to a look at her variety of undergarments. Black with lace trim, beige with bows on the side, even a red bra, which tormented him with images of what she’d look like with her voluptuous breasts filling the cups, her cleavage spilling out for him to see.
A man walked out of a neighboring apartment, basket in hand, headed to the laundry room. Considering he was coming from inside the building, Ben gave him the benefit of the doubt. As much as he wanted to, he didn’t frisk the guy before letting him into the communal laundry room, figuring it would be overkill.
He stepped aside, keeping an eye on the guy, who came up next to Summer and placed his basket on top of a neighboring machine, giving Ben a curious look.
“Summer, where have you been hiding?” he asked, his eyes lighting up at the sight of her.
Great. Another admirer. Everywhere Summer went, she was surrounded by leering assholes who wanted to get into her pants. Ben folded his arms across his chest and glared at the preppy-looking guy in khaki shorts and a polo shirt.
“Greg! It’s been too long.” She pulled him into what Ben considered a too friendly hug, her breasts pressing against his chest for a second before she stepped back.
Ben’s skin felt tight as he watched, annoyed and jealous of their interaction.
“I saw you kick ass on TV,” Greg said, mouth curving in a smile.
“Really? Aren’t you at work in the morning?”
He laughed. “Yeah, but I watch the entertainment shows at night. You’re becoming famous. Pretty soon you’ll be moving out of this place and taking a bigger, swankier apartment befitting your status.”
She rolled her eyes, blushing at the compliment. “I’m perfectly happy here. So how’s work?” she asked.
“Doing well. I got a promotion.” He straightened his shoulders, and Ben was surprised he wasn’t beating his chest. “So when are you going to put me out of my misery and go out with me?” Greg asked, playfully nudging her with his arm.
Ben ground his teeth waiting for her to answer.
Summer glanced away. “Greg, you know I like you, but my life is way too busy right now to commit to dating.” She closed the top of the laundry machine, pressed a few buttons, swiped her credit card, and the hum of the machine began to sound.
“How about after things quiet down?” he asked, not giving up.
“Maybe,” Summer said, her cheeks still pink from his earlier compliment.
Ben didn’t care if she’d said it to pacify Greg, he didn’t like that she’d agreed to possibly see him some undetermined day in the future.
Greg moved in closer. “I’ll take that as a yes,” he said, just proving Ben’s unspoken feelings. That he was a smarmy ass, too slick for a woman like Summer.
“Greg—” She hesitated just long enough, giving him time to chime in.
“How about I just ask you again next time we run into each other?”
Ben had had enough of their chitchat. She’d finished her laundry, and as far as he was concerned, they could go back to her apartment.
He cleared his throat. The sound came out sounding more like an annoyed growl. “Time to go,” he said, telling himself he was rescuing Summer from an uncomfortable situation. Whether she wanted to be rescued or not.
“Who is that guy?” Greg asked. “I didn’t realize he was with you.”
“That is my bodyguard,” Summer said, glancing Ben’s way.
He couldn’t read her expression, didn’t know if she was grateful he’d given her an excuse to leave or annoyed he was interrupting her time with Greg.
“You need security? Is everything okay?” the other man asked.
“None of your business,” he said to the nosy man. He glanced at Summer. “You’re finished here, so it’s time to go.” Ben knew he was being a jealous dick, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.
Now Summer did shoot him an annoyed glare before turning to the neighbor. “Everything is fine. It’s just precautionary but I do need to get going,” she murmured. “It was nice seeing you.”
Ben grabbed the basket in one hand and Summer’s elbow in another and escorted her out of the room, into the hall, and straight for her apartment, closing and locking the door behind them.
* * *
Summer let Ben lead her back to her apartment without argument only because she didn’t want to make an embarrassing scene in front of her neighbor.
Once they were inside and the door locked, she turned to him. “What the hell is your problem? That was beyond rude behavior!”
Ben placed the basket down on the floor. “He was a pushy, annoying asshole,” he muttered, but his face flushed a deep red, telling her he wasn’t all that thrilled with his own actions either.
She raised her eyebrows, recalling the way he’d watched her during her interaction with Greg, the obvious scowl and the rolling of his eyes, things he probably hadn’t even been conscious of doing.
Realization dawned at why he’d reacted so strongly. “Ben Hollander, you were jealous. Greg asked me out and it bothered you!”
“He wouldn’t take no for an answer and that bugged me.”
She folded her arms and stepped into his private space. “I. Don’t. Believe. You.” She poked him in the chest. “Admit it. You were jealous.”
“It’s not jealousy. It’s that everywhere we go, guys are looking, leering, hitting on you, and you’re damned oblivious!”
“No they aren’t! Name one place.”
“Starbucks. The guy practically has your order ready the second you walk in the door.”
“Kevin?”
“You know his name?”
She rolled her eyes at his absurdity. “Of course I do. I practically live there, which is why he memorized my order and probably everyone else’s who is a repeat customer.”
“The gym.”
“Jason is my trainer!”
“How about the man who scans your ID card when you walk in and asks if you’ll be his date for Thursday night Bingo?”
“Mel is old enough to be my grandfather.” She choked back a laugh.
“Okay then, the guy who makes your protein shake and has an eye on your boobs the entire time?” he asked, voice rising.
“Mac flirts with everyone!”
“You know all their names!”
She blinked at the serious tone in his voice, unable to believe that he noticed whether guys took an interest in her. That it bothered him was at odds with the man who’d dictated the terms of their relationship as bodyguard and client or just friends.
She tamped down the unwanted spark of hope that flared to life inside her at the prospect of his caring leading to something more between them. Sexually she desired him, but on an emotional level, she wanted a relationship with him, too. They had time together, and why not explore the different facets of a romantic connection between them? He’d claimed to need distance, but she was beginning to wonder if he was merely fooling himself about what he truly wanted.
She ran her tongue over her lips, very aware that he followed the movement with his darkened blue eyes.
“Why do you care who I talk to? Who flirts with me? Who I tease back? You said we needed to keep our distance,” she reminded him.
“I do. I need distance. I just fucking … can’t.” And then his mouth was on hers, hard and demanding.
His hands came to her hips and he picked her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and he stepped back, pushing her against the wall, his lips never leaving hers. His tongue thrust past the barrier, gliding over hers, tangling and teasing. And his hands slipped beneath her shirt, gliding up, up until his big hand cupped her breast.
She groaned at the unexpected touch, moaned at the swipe of his rough fingertips beneath the cup of her bra, over her nipple.
He broke this kiss and his lips came down on her neck, pulling the skin into his mouth, nipping at her flesh. “God, Ben.” She ground her hips against his hard cock, need spiking through her.
“I want you. I go to sleep wanting you. I wake up wanting you.”
A thrill raced through her. This was what she’d been waiting for. The admission that he desired her as much as she did him. His ultimate capitulation.
“But I can’t trust myself to keep you safe if I’m distracted by sleeping with you.”
Her sex pulsed at the thought of him thrusting inside her. “Aren’t you distracted now? By all this building, unfulfilled desire?”
To her disappointment, he slid her down his body, the hard ridge of his erection gliding against her cotton clothes. She registered the touch and softened with need, her panties growing even damper.
“Do you really think you can’t do your job if we’re sleeping together?” she asked.
“It’s not just that.” He stepped back. Ran a shaking hand through his hair.
“Surely you don’t think I’m going to tell someone and get you fired again.” She studied his serious expression, trying to figure out what was holding him back.
“Of course not. It’s deeper than that. It’s my past, what I’ve seen with my—”
Before he could explain further, a familiar ring sounded from where her computer sat open on the table by the couch. The FaceTime ringtone indicated she was getting a call, and the only people who’d contact her this way were her parents, who she hadn’t spoken to in almost a week.
Her gaze darted from Ben’s tortured expression to the computer.
“Go. Take the call.”
“But—”
“Go,” he insisted, walking into the kitchen and getting lost staring into the refrigerator before taking out a can of soda.
She shook her head. “This isn’t finished,” she said, heading to take the face-to-face call with her parents. After which, she intended to pin Ben down on why he was pulling away after admitting he didn’t want to let her go.