Chapter 5

 

Like clockwork, Jordan came in every morning for five coffees and a dozen donuts. Each morning, we made small talk before the next customer came in, and then he’d leave with a smile and a wink.

I was actually starting to get used to having the guy around, and when he didn’t come in at nine on Thursday, I worried.

Was he done on the house? Did someone finally buy a coffeemaker?

I had enough issues going on with trying to fill the cake order for Dana. She wanted this four-tier monstrosity she saw on Pinterest that I was pretty sure was made by a professional on a cake show and not a small-town bakery.

“Whoa, someone has you doing math?” a deep male voice said.

I didn’t even hear the bell over the door or his boot steps, but I was really getting used to Jordan Webber’s voice. And that smile. Holy shit, his smile. When I looked up from the notebook I was scribbling on, he was leaning on the pastry case with that lopsided grin painted on his face.

“I’m helping the owner with the cake for Sofie’s shower, and it requires some work on the dimensions,” I grumbled.

“You know, I’m not very good at math either, but I can try to help you out,” he offered.

I laughed, shaking my head before pushing the notebook toward him on the counter. “If you think you can do this, be my guest.”

Jordan leaned over, licking his bottom lip before taking the pencil and staring down at the paper. With his bicep bulging on the counter, I could get a better look at the tattoo peeking out of the bottom of his shirtsleeve.

“Do you seriously have a tattoo of the state of Texas?” I asked without thinking, pushing up his sleeve. I recognized the bottom shape, but there were little black lines dangling down from the state. It wasn’t until I pulled up his sleeve that I noticed the black lines were actually roots and the bright purple leaves of a mountain laurel spread up his arm with the roots firmly planted in the black outline of the state.

“Yeah. Had to keep my Texas roots even in New York,” he murmured.

He was so close; I could feel his breath on my cheek. One move to the right and his lips would be on mine. Just one little taste.

But instead of going for what I wanted, I held my breath then pulled back, putting my hands on the counter between us before I let out the air I was holding. “So figure out that math?”

He laughed, shaking his head. “No, I was just using it as an excuse to get closer to you.”

His eyes met mine, and I swear the guy’s stare had a direct link to my panty line because if I thought I was horny before—holy hell, one look from Jordan and I wanted to fan my vagina.

“Uh, um, well.” I cleared my throat, trying to think of the best response. “Do you need coffee? You’re here later than usual today, so you probably really need the caffeine.”

Great job, Abbey. That was an open invitation to enter the one-stall restroom and screw his brains out. Brooke probably wouldn’t mind or tell Carla. She would probably even put it in a book.

Jordan smirked. “My aunt bought a coffeemaker. She said if we were going to be there, it was cheaper than buying it every day, but she knew my reason for coming here wasn’t just for the coffee, so I waited until we took a break from ripping up the carpet this morning.”

“Oh, um, do you want a refresher then? Or a lemonade? Or something? Carpet tearing. That must be a lot of work,” I rambled, trying to think of what to say.

“I don’t know if I like this nervous Abbey or the angry Abbey more. Whatever changed in the past couple of days, I like it.”

“Well, maybe it’s because I’m single, and you smell really good,” I blurted then shook my head, covering my mouth. “I really need to learn to get a filter.”

“I’m pretty sure I smell like sweat and sawdust, but if that turns you on … you should come to my grandma’s garage …” He leaned in closer, biting down on his bottom lip which had to be one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen.

“I’m not going to fuck you in your grandma’s garage.”

Before he could respond, a choking sound came from behind Jordan. I popped my head up and saw Brooke in the corner, covering her mouth and banging her fist on her chest.

“Something funny on YouTube?” I yelled, hoping she was watching something on her laptop, even though her headphones weren’t on and I couldn’t hear anything.

Brooke took a deep breath and waved her hand. “No. Fine. Just carry on with your conversation.”

“I guess on that note; I should head back. But you know the offer still stands,” Jordan said, tapping his fingers on the counter.

“I think I’ll pass on screwing in your grandma’s garage. Though that does sound super romantic,” I muttered the last part.

“I’m all about the romance, you know. Maybe I’ll paint some flowers or something.”

I shook my head. Why did I have this fantasy in my head that any guy would romance me? I think I played Jordan up in my head more than the actual guy. Maybe I wasn’t a girl meant for real relationships or real romance. Maybe I was always going to be awkward Abbey.

“I’ll see you later, Jordan.”

He opened his mouth like he was going to say something else then nodded before pushing off the counter and heading out the door. Not saying a word or anything else.

“Is that going in a book?” I yelled to Brooke, not looking up from the notebook for fear of how red my face was.

“Like I said when I first started coming here, anything you say or do can and will be used in a book.”

“Can you at least give the girl a happy ending?”

“Sexually or romantically?” Brooke yelled back.

“Both.”

 

***

 

 

Mom’s property has at least ten acres, if not more. She bought it for the old house and really only cared about the quarter of an acre that it sat on, which made it easy to sneak away when I wanted to be alone.

And I needed to be.

I thought maybe I could go upstairs to my bedroom and, ahem, have that alone time. But Mom and Dave were playing classical music on her record player as they made little trinkets for Sofie’s shower. That was enough to make me want to either gag or just get out of the house.

Through overgrown grass and a few random tree branches, I finally made it to my own personal fortress. A small pond right at the edge of the property was surrounded by a few trees and gave me the ultimate privacy. Sometimes, the cattle from the TL Ranch would break through the gates, and I’d catch one lapping up the water, but it had been a long time since that last happened.

I think when Eddie bought his parents a new fence, he also worked on the pond. Must have since a small dock was added about ten years ago that overlooked the water, but other than that, there wasn’t any sign of life, not even fish swimming in the water. I knew this because I could vividly remember the only person I ever brought to the pond was Jordan, and he suggested going skinny dipping.

“Ugh, stupid Jordan Webber!” I groaned out loud, thinking of that sexy smirk and the way he talked to me.

I slumped down on the dock, and the boards creaked slightly. I knew the dock was sturdy enough to hold me, but even with the small amount of wood rot I found, the deck collapsing under me was the least of my concerns.

Why did he have to come back? I guess the real question should be why did he have to leave? And why was I so willing to let him back into my heart and panties after all this time? I knew with him it couldn’t be just sex like it was with Joey. With Jordan, I gave my everything all those years ago. Yes, we were dumb teenagers, but I never forgot the guy who took my virginity and everything else.

I groaned, closing my eyes and laying my head back on the dock. Since it was the beginning of the summer, the days were getting longer, and I knew I could stay out until close to nine before Mom came looking for me. That would surely give me enough time to decide what to do. To go for it and have a friends-with-benefits fling for the summer with Jordan or to forget about him.

“I thought I might find you out here,” a low voice said.

No, it couldn’t be. It just couldn’t.

My eyes snapped open, and there was Jordan, leaning against the tree next to the dock with his arms crossed over his chest and his biceps flexed. Or maybe they just looked that toned all the time? I mentally shook the thoughts of his body out of my head and sat up.

“What are you doing here?” I asked

“Well …” He pushed off the tree and slowly made his way down to the dock until he took a seat next to me. His toned biceps grazed my arms on the way down, and I tried not to think about how warm his skin felt on mine or about how the last time I saw him on the dock, he was completely naked.

“Your mom said you weren’t home, and since your car was there, I knew this would be the first place you’d go.”

His smile lit up his whole face even his brilliant blue eyes. I wanted to hate him or to say something snarky, but I found myself biting down on my lower lip to keep myself from kissing him.

Why did he have to be so damn attractive? Sure, he was cute in high school, but time had really been good to him. That and probably the gym, judging by the defined muscles I couldn’t help but notice under his thin t-shirt. Did artists go to gyms? He never went in high school. Maybe he had nothing better to do in the city.

“That doesn’t give you the right to come here,” I mumbled. It was the only thing I could get out.

His fingers brushed against my skin; the warm sensation of his touch caused me to gasp, forcing me to look up and meet his eyes, now only inches from mine.

“I know. And I shouldn’t have been an ass at the bakery. I figured since trying to talk to you and meet up wasn’t going to work, I’d stop being subtle. But obviously, that’s not working either. I can’t stay away, Abbey. You’re all I can think about. All I’m craving,” he whispered the last part.

I tried to focus on his words, but all I could think about was how full his lips were and how his words were just a whisper on my mouth. I swallowed hard, regaining my strength to speak.

“It’s not going to be easy. You know, if we start something. Whether it’s friends or whatever.” I moved my chin away from him and looked out at the pond. The sun was just dusting the tops of the wheat at the TL Ranch and cast an orange glow over everything in its path.

“A lot of things have changed, you know. And a lot of stuff in the past is hard to forget.”

His hand slid up to the side of my face, forcing me to look at him. “Yes, but the future is still out there.”

Just as he leaned in, I heard the creak of the boards, and this time, it was louder than when I sat down. Before Jordan could move any closer, the middle boards broke from underneath me, and I dropped back first into the water below.

The water wasn’t that deep, so it didn’t take long for me to come up for air and find myself facing Jordan in the waist-deep water, soaked as well.

“Look what you did!” I ran my hands through my wet hair, slicking it back behind my head.

“I guess if the dock gods want us to take a swim, then so be it.” He flashed a cockeyed grin then peeled his t-shirt over his head and threw it on what was left of the dock. I couldn’t help but stare at the wonder before me. Every defined muscle proved he really did spend hours at the gym, and every rock-hard ab was just calling for me to run my fingers over it.

I wanted to call his bluff, but my hands were shaky. I wasn’t as confident as he was. I never had been. It was why I didn’t follow him to New York. Why I never went to college. I was always scared of the unknown, and Jordan Webber was definitely a big unknown.

“O-okay,” I managed to stumble out. I shook my wet hair out behind me and then peeled my tank top off. Thank God, I wore a bra underneath it, but I’m not sure how much that mattered. I was already soaked, and Jordan was going to see me in all my pasty glory with the extra twenty pounds sitting right on my hips.

Jordan’s grin turned into an all-out toothy smile. “So that’s what was hiding under there.”

He waded through the water until he was right in front of me, the toes of his shoes right against mine. He leaned in so close I could feel his breath on my face. “You always were sexiest when you were wet.”

I fumbled backward, my words catching in my throat. I didn’t know what I wanted in a future with this guy, but with the water droplets dripping down Jordan’s hair and on to his perfect mouth, I wanted nothing more than to be those water droplets.

I caught myself against the small rock wall near the edge of the pond, careful that I wouldn’t fall over from being weak in the knees. Jordan moved in slow, fluid movements, putting his hands on either side of the rock wall and then pressed his bare skin against mine. His abs were just as warm as his hands, and his body was even harder than I remembered.

“Jordan, I … I …”

He pressed his forehead to mine. Even with the overwhelming pond smells around us, his smell was still as intoxicating as I remembered it. The sawdust scent surrounded me. It was hard to resist giving myself to him.

“I know I was a jerk to leave you. I should have made you come with me. I should have fought harder for you, but I was too focused on myself …”

I finally locked my eyes on his. It felt like it had been forever since I’d actually seen him, but looking into his eyes and seeing the longing made me forget about all the years that had passed.

“Y-y-you can’t just expect to come back, and me let you in,” I said with as much courage as I could muster. My body trembled against his. One part of me wanted to push him away, but a much bigger part wanted to succumb to his embrace.

“I’m not expecting anything from you. I just hope you’ll let me try.”

Before I could even answer, he sealed his lips against mine, and my whole body responded with an explosion. I moved my hands to run my fingers through his damp hair, and he pressed his arms around my lower back, pulling me up as I wrapped my legs around his waist.

His tongue moved in delicately slow motion behind my lips as if he was savoring me. He moved our intertwined bodies forward, pressing my back against the rock wall again, and I felt his hardness against my stomach. No matter how badly I wanted him, I had to stop. I wasn’t about to have our first time together be in a pond. Who knew what kind of bacteria was in there? That, and I was pretty sure if my mom told him I was out here, then she would eventually come looking for us.

I tilted my head back, which only led Jordan’s lips to trail down my neck and his tongue to slide against my collarbone.

“We can’t do this,” I whispered. “Not here. Not ever maybe.”

“You can’t deny this, Abbey,” he murmured against my neck.

“But what if we try this, and then you leave again? Then what?” I asked, without thinking and putting it all out there. Letting my vulnerability show.

I looked back down, meeting his pleading eyes. His breath came out small and ragged, and then a large smile crossed his face as he pressed his forehead to mine. “This time, I’m not going anywhere without you.”