I hear soothing voices and beeping but don’t smell the antiseptic aromas affiliated with hospitals, so I take a moment to wonder where I am, and I realize I don’t feel any pain.
A hand runs soothingly across my forehead making me flinch. Which is followed by a groan from deep within my chest.
“Luther,” is whispered from close by. “She’s coming to.”
The sound of a door opening reaches my ears as the hand falls away.
“Everyone out,” he snarls. I can feel the anger pulsing off of him. I know he must hate me for not following through and getting Timothy for them. I hate me for it, too.
The bed shifts as, I assume, he sits on it. What I don’t expect is for the gentle touch of his hands as he lifts my limp body and holds me to him. “I’ve got you, princess.” His voice is…loving.
Tears spring to my eyes, even though I can’t open them. “It hurts,” I murmur as agony slowly leaks into my limbs. The wounds on my arms throb with every beat of my heart.
A subtle move pulls him from me, followed by a light beep, and he whispers into my ear, “Morphine will kick in, in a second. Sleep.”
The rush of medicine assaults me, and I feel like I’m floating in the sky, free of the pain and heartache of my life. Free of the guilt as his hands massage my scalp.
Soon, sleep takes me away, and I wonder if his gentleness has all been a dream or if he’ll really be here when I wake again.
Luther
I hold Ariel in my arms for the first time since we met. She’s been in and out of consciousness from the time we brought her home from Arthur’s—the doctor we keep on retainer for such instances as this.
Every time, she wakes up in more pain than the last.
I doubt she’s even aware of where she is or what’s going on.
At first, I was torn between going with Daniel and Atticus to hunt Timothy down and staying here. I’m not a sentimental man. I’m hard, unforgiving, but with Ariel, all the rules have been tossed out the window, and I want nothing more than to make sure she never hurts again.
Castiel is still in Louisiana trying to get more information from the Andersson’s about what Thomas has been doing there, and where he might have gone next. Atticus will be heading to Alaska to find out what the half-sister knows about them. And Carver has been jonesing for revenge. He’s already killed one of the men he captured at Timothy’s estate, so I’m sure one more will follow soon.
“Luther?” Ariel’s croaked voice has me rushing to her side.
“Yeah, princess.” I sit beside her hip, trying not to rattle her broken body. While she’d taken a hell of a beating, she, thankfully, didn’t sustain any broken bones. Her jaw has been severely bruised but not broken, and she’s got more stitches in her arms and back than I like to think about, but she will be fine. I’ll make sure of it.
“Did you get him?” Her soft question is filled with defeat. She knows the answer without me saying anything.
“We’re following some leads,” I tell her.
“Dimitri Petrov,” she says. “Find him, and you’ll have Timothy.” Her voice is weak, and she’s barely able to open her eyes.
“Rest,” I say to her.
Intrigued by this new name, I send a text to Daniel to look into the man. As frustrated as I have been with the kid, he’s proven more valuable than not over the past few months as we’ve dealt with the McCray mess. I’ve been working with him in hand to hand combat and extensive weapons training. King has assigned him to be lead on Lilith’s protection detail and wants the kid to be the best. He shows promise and will do well, but he needs to learn to handle his emotions better, or Lil will play him like a fiddle.
Quietly leaving Ariel to rest in my room, I make my way downstairs to the dungeon, intent on finding out as much as I can about her life in that hell. What her treatment was like, why Timothy singled out her and her mom seventeen years ago.
Entering the room, Carver has one man strapped to a chair just like we’d found Ariel attached a week ago. I say nothing as he plays with the man, little nicks visible all over his body.
Not in the mood to mess around, I grab the blowtorch off the wall and walk back over to the men chained to the wall. Six of them all together.
Their eyes are glued to me as I remove my shirt. Rolling my neck from side to side, I work out the kinks. I pick the torch back up and look into each man’s eyes, testing their defiance.
Immediately, I can pick out the weakest of the lot; however, I stand before the most insolent one.
Lighting the tip, the whoosh of the flame is the only sound in the room as Carver stops with his own torture. “I want answers,” I command. “The first to give them to me dies a painless death.” Some nod, other’s stare at the wall. “Who has been with Timothy longest?” I ask, now striding past each one. He’s the one I’ll target with the most pain.
“Me!” The one I pegged as the weakest speaks up.
Looking him in the eye, I inform him honestly, “You will all die here. None of you are going to leave this room. So tell me, how willing are you to talk before I torture you?”
Indecision plays in his gaze as he tries to imagine the horrors I will likely bestow upon them. His stare blanks out, and he looks to the wall. I have my answer. I’ll have to force his hand.
Without a word, I walk to the one with rebellion in his eyes. I see him preparing for the agony about to assault his body as I bring the torch to his chest. His screams of misery encompass the room as his flesh melts beneath the flame. Ten seconds in and he’s vomiting as I pull away.
“You ready now?” I ask the first man. His face is a mask of terror as he gives a sharp nod.
Unlocking the man’s chains, I drag him to the door.
“Kill him,” I say as I nod to the man I’d just torched. No need for him to suffer longer than necessary when he was only a tool at my disposal.
“What’s your name?” I ask the man I’m dragging to King’s office.
“Anton.” His voice is quiet, filled with horror.
“Well, Anton, tell us everything, and you won’t suffer the same fate as your friend back there.” He nods as we stop at the doors. “Lie to me once, and I will make sure you suffer that way for days before I end you.” He pales as I push him through.
Ariel
The ache in my body tells me I’m alive. My full bladder tells me I need to move, or a dam will burst. I’m unsure of how long I’ve been out or even what day it is, but I do know that almost every time I’ve woken up, Luther has been here.
Gingerly climbing from the bed, I know I’m in his room and alone. The house is quiet as I move to the bathroom. Flicking the light on, I cringe as the brightness hurts my tired eyes.
I go to wash my hands, and the reflection glaring back at me isn’t me. Or, at least, it doesn’t look like me. Bruises and cuts cover nearly the entire surface of my face. My red hair that’s ordinarily bright and untamable is lifeless and greasy.
Who is this girl?
Have I been so broken that I’ve entirely changed?
The only recognizable feature is the haunted look in my eyes. Resting my hands against the sink, I fight to stay upright. I fight to keep myself from finally tumbling over the edge. I’ve experienced the worst humanity has to offer and can’t seem to catch a break.
My heart, body, and soul all hurt. The agony consumes my every thought. Every breath I take is a reminder of all the evil in this world and how I’m stuck.
Except for Luther…
He made me feel something at a time I had wished for more.
I can’t say that he has made me want to live longer; nevertheless, he’s opened my mind to attraction, but without him here with me, I feel myself drowning back into the abyss of nothingness.
No more misery.
No more betrayal.
No more…
“Ariel.” Wow, thinking of the man has summoned him. “What are you doing?” His voice is as soft as I’ve ever heard it.
“I want out, Luther,” The words are ripped from the very depths of my soul. Everything I feel or don’t feel is intertwined in every syllable.
“Not yet,” he says as if he can understand the pain and suffering I’ve felt.
Slowly turning, I take him in. His chest is bare, his pants hang loosely off his hips, and I wonder, not for the first time, how it would feel to have all that strength and muscle surrounding me. Loving me.
“How long has it been?” I ask.
“A week.” He always knows what I’m saying.
“Have you found him?”
“We have a lead. We set up surveillance on the Dimitri guy you mentioned up in Alaska, near your aunt.”
Confused, I ask, “Aunt?”
“Catalina. You didn’t know?” I shake my head.
“Who are these people?” The hits keep on coming, and they never cease to amaze me.
“She’s your age. It looks like the McCray family split apart about a year or two before Timothy came here. They all share the same mother. Far as we can tell, Catalina is free of this life.”
“Must be nice,” I mumble.
“Ariel,” he snarls as he walks closer.
“I just want to be free, too, Luther. The pain, the memories, I want it all gone. I want to see light instead of dark.” His grip is punishing as he brings me to his chest, wrapping his arms around my battered body. The feel of his solid muscles, warm skin, his heartbeat, they scream life. A hard life, but his life, nonetheless.
“With me, princess, you can be anything you fucking want to, so long as you’re also mine.” I feel more than hear the growled words.
“I want to believe you,” I whisper. A tear escapes my eye as he gently brushes one hand down my hair.
“Let me show you, Ariel.” I’d never have suspected that he could be so soft with another human being. I doubt anyone else has seen this side of him. His hands slowly work to get my baggy shirt off, leaving me naked before him as he guides me to the enormous shower. Sitting me on the bench, he turns the warm water on and strips free of his own clothes.
Angling the jets directly at us, he lifts me to lay in his lap, holding me tight to his chest. The safety in his arms a sensation I could become used to.
“I’ll shield you from the world if only you’ll let me, Ariel.”
Luther
I don’t think she’s even realized that her body has been trembling since I started watching her in the bathroom. Her painful gaze had been reflected in the mirror, in the way she held her body. Every word she spoke screamed save me.
I’d kill to give this girl anything her heart desires, but I can’t do that until she lets me in. I’m just going to have to prove to her that I can be her safety net. That I can, and will, keep the torment of life away from her.
Holding her in my arms as she fights herself, I struggle not to dominate her or take the choice away from her. She needs reassurance before she needs intimacy.
“Anton talked,” I tell her quietly. Her body tenses, but there’s no other reaction, so I continue. “Timothy is definitely not your father. He met your mom and became obsessed. Took over her entire world.” I grab the shampoo and massage it into her hair. “When she tried to leave, he killed her. Made it look like suicide.” Her sniffling breaks my jaded heart.
“I barely remember her,” she murmurs into my chest.
“The mansion is being searched for any clues as to where he and Thomas have gone. I’ve told Daniel to make sure they look for anything pertaining to your mom.” Just because my mother had been a shitty human being, didn’t mean hers was. She never got the chance to find out, and I figure that maybe learning about where she came from would help her hold on long enough for me to convince her I could be her everything.
Pushing back from my chest, her hazel eyes search mine as she asks, “Did you find out what happened to my real dad?”
Fuck.
I don’t want to dash her hopes. “Anton insists he wasn’t in the picture at all.”
“Oh.” Her disappointment is palpable. “Thank you, Luther.”
“For what?”
“Not lying to me. I know you’ve probably sugar-coated things, but I don’t feel like you’ve lied to me.”
Leaning forward, I press my lips to her forehead, saying, “I’ll never lie to you if I can help it.”
Assisting her with rinsing her hair, we finish cleaning up, and I have to hold her upright from her exhaustion. The beating of her body has her mind so messed up that she struggles to do the smallest thing. If it weren’t for me forcing her to eat, I don’t think she would do that either.
An idea strikes me as I help her back into bed.
Lilith.
When I brought her to King, she’d been in this very place, ready for death to take her as well. “I’ll be back,” I say, leaving the room again.
Closing the door quietly behind me, I head down the stairs, focused on finding Lil. She’s leaving King’s office as I round the corner.
“Hi, Luther.” She smiles, and so much life radiates from her. I know she’s the perfect one to help Ariel sort through her mind.
“I need a favor, Lil,” I begin, and she nods. “Will you talk to Ariel?”
Her brows furrow in confusion. “About what?”
“I don’t care. Spend time with her; show her not everyone is evil. She’s ready to die, Lil.” My voice is gruff, and I see shock in her eyes as I reveal the truth.
“She’s in bed?” I nod. “I’ll talk to her, but don’t expect a miracle, Luther. She was ready to embrace peace long before you found her. Remember that.”
I fucking remember, alright. Uneasiness swirls through my mind as I wonder if she wouldn’t have been better off that day. Maybe I should have let her jump. She wouldn’t have had to endure torture if I had.
Ariel
As soon as Luther left the room, I got up from bed and walked over to the window beside one of the dressers. The drop is four stories up. It may or may not kill me, depending on how I land.
The demons in my mind, they keep attacking me. Every doubt I have, they latch onto and encourage. Every time I feel the smallest inkling of hope or life, they toss out every bad thing in my life through a display in my mind. The doubt creeps back in, and the pain and fear wash through me like they never went away.
Pushing the window open, I swing my legs over the side as the sheer curtains billow in the wind. The day is quiet, peaceful. Birds fly in the air, clouds are non-existent, and the sky is a cerulean blue.
It wouldn’t be a bad day to die.
Except…
I don’t feel the same sense of peace I did that first time. I was leaving a life of misery behind; I was escaping. But that life has been demolished since then. Torn apart like a ship in a storm. I could start over; I could have something more than I thought I’d been given.
I look back over my shoulder to the door that Luther exited through. If only I were strong enough to fight for us.
Leaning into the frame of the window, I silently watch the world, wondering if I can move forward.
A whispered, “Hey,” startles me, and I grip the windowsill to stop from falling. “Sorry, I don’t mean to scare you,” the soft voice says as I turn around.
“It’s okay,” I tell her. “I saw you that first day.” I don’t think I’ve ever gotten her name.
“I’m Lilith.” She smiles. Her eyes radiate her happiness and worry. “You wanna come off of there?”
I look back out and say honestly, “I don’t know.”
“I was like you,” Lilith replies, and I look at her questioningly. “Ready to die. Maybe not in the same way, or even for the same reasons. But I’ve seen the bad side of the world, and frankly, it sucks.”
“Yeah, it does,” I murmur, listening to her speak. Her voice is soothing as she tells me about meeting King for the first time. When she mentioned Thomas’ name and how he had kidnapped and tortured her, the way the men fought to get her back, I felt relief. Because if she could work her way out of hell, maybe I could, too.
“Luther, he’s a hard man. He won’t show it or say it, but you’re special to him. I know he’s trying, in the best way he knows how, to give you something worth living for.”
“He is,” I confirm.
She walks closer, reaching her hand out for me. “Show him you know then, Ariel.” I look back out the window and down. “These men, they’re tough, they’re cruel. I could argue that they’re the spawn of Satan, but Ariel, they’re fiercely dedicated to the things they’re passionate about. I am one of those things, and I have a feeling you are, too.”
“It’s hard, Lilith,” I tell her. “I was forced to sell children for years, to watch as they realized their fate. Timothy…” I have to pause to take a breath. “His clients, they used to send him videos of horrible things they’d do to them, and he made me watch.” I look back to her and see that she’s got a tear in her eye, finally realizing the extent of my damage. “I still hear and see it all. I want it gone from my mind.”
Before I know what’s happening, Lilith’s pulling me from the window and wrapping me in her arms as we cry together. I don’t know how long she holds me and soothes my anguish; I just register her touch. It’s what I’ve longed for my entire life. The warmth and comfort, I’m cocooned in it, and the rush of emotions I’ve been fighting to hide burst forth.
“It’s okay to live, Ariel. You deserve happiness. The sun and the stars could be yours if only you reach for it, fight for it.” Her words calm something inside of me, and all the pain I’d been holding onto breaks free, leaving me a shell in her arms.
I’m finally free.