,
Then…
Bane Stratus
I HAD TO walk away. I left her in the kitchen. I am famished. But not for steak. She always had that effect on me. I don't know what came over me. I have never actually acted on my urges, came close, but this time the damage is done. I kissed her. Her luscious lips were pressed to mine, the world could have ended in that moment and I wouldn't have noticed.
I don’t deserve her. I must resolve to not touch her either. Yeah Right. Instead of dwelling on what I can’t have, I turn my computer on to start work. I should find out what Danny was hiding.
When the chime of my computer loading up fills the air, I figure it’s time to get to the bottom of this. I know Danny wanted to keep Jesse in the dark about the whole operation to keep her safe. I always understood that, but me, not so much. If her father knew of her involvement or knowledge, she would have been dealt with, with direr operations. Death would have been a blessing. She would have been sold to the most dangerous, repulsive buyer her father could find. Hell, he would pay someone to take her, knowing her life would be hell, just to make a point. But me, if she was safe, there was nothing he could do to me. I start to remember how it all began.
From the start, it was risky. Nobody could know what we were planning. It started shortly after I was banished from the club, and from Jess. I was living in Detroit, Michigan. In a small apartment, living in squalor. Barely making it alive. If I didn't die from starvation the rats would have taken me. Danny wouldn't speak to me, I figured Marco had told him what almost happened with his little sister. But still, I feel if he could contact me he would. I mean I was "exiled" for lack of a better term.
It had been raining for two days straight, with no quit in sight. It seemed Mother Nature was homing in on my emotions because ever since I left Jess behind, everything seemed dim and cold. Danny found me in my "apartment" curled up on the floor, practically freezing to death. Let's just say January in Michigan is not warm. With no money for electricity and gas I was stuck roughing it. It was hard finding a job with no "legal" experience or history. I heard Danny grumble under his breath, obviously feeling sorry for me. I mean we were best friends. But I could tell, he was disappointed in me. The goal from day one was to protect Jess. Not seduce her. I compromised that.
"Get up" He demanded, "We're out of here"
I didn't move, too embarrassed by how hard I had fallen. But eventually I stood from my weedy position. I could tell by the look in his stern black eyes, he wasn’t happy to see me, nor was he happy about involving me, again.
We packed up what little I had and walked out to baby, his truck.
"I need you to man up. You jeopardized everything the first time, and if I could do this without you I would. But I need you. She needs you”. I nod, running my hands down my face.
Our destination is a little over six hours away from Michigan. Back to Ohio. We don't speak for almost two hours, I need to find a way to explain. He needs to know. I didn’t just threaten the mission but I also broke the bro-code. I feel for his baby sister.
"I love her" I blurt.
Danny slams on the breaks bringing baby to a halt.
"You can't love her" he says out of breath. His knuckles turning white from gripping the steering wheel. "stuff that shit down, bro. Your hands are bloody. She is innocent. You’re not good enough.”
His words stung. But he is right. The things I have done, they hardened me. They had to. If not, they would eat me alive. I could never give her warm cuddles and tender kisses. I don't date. But for her, I want to. I want to be all those things for her.
After a few collective breaths, he starts to accelerate, we were on our way again. We didn't speak for the rest of the ride. When we pulled up to a ranch house out in the middle of nowhere, I noticed it was completely isolated. There is a dark red barn to the left of the driveway and a huge fenced field to the right.
Danny turns to me with pain and frustration in his eyes, like it hurt to look at me. He was disappointed. So was I.
“I’ll be back in the morning with a friend. Then I will explain the new plan. Just don’t fuck it up this time”
I nod. Not knowing what to say. He is my best friend but things are strained. His little sister is his life, if he says I am not good enough for her. Then maybe he doesn't trust me like I thought. He should know I would never hurt her, not intentionally that is. If he doesn't trust me, coming from the most loyal trustworthy guy I know, then maybe I am a danger to her. As painful as it is, I need to let her go.
I jolt from the memory. I let her go that day. I shut it off. But that all changed when she showed up outside as planned. I can’t stay away when she is so close to touch. I thought I could. But I was fucking wrong.
When Danny found out that Marco knew about the plan for corporate espionage, he contacted Jay. Though Jay is an asshole, who couldn't care less if Danny lived or died, came through big. He came up with the idea to "fake" Danny death. He informed us of the toxin that would make Danny appear dead for just shy of 24 hours. I never trusted him, but Danny did. After he took the toxin, Jay had some of his “buddies” in the precinct take the call. They would transport the body to the morgue after having Marco and Star identify their son's body. Then they would call it a suicide by overdose. Jay would go down to the morgue and give him the antidote, by then Jess would have been already here, and Danny could come and explain everything. But that's not what happened.
Jay went down to the morgue to wake him up, the antidote failed. Danny wouldn’t wake up. His body was already cold.
He immediately called me in a frantic, almost too frantic, given he didn’t give a fuck about us. It was suspicious. Marco wouldn't want Danny dead just out of the way. He was a sick bastard, but to kill his only son? That leaves Jay and his cohorts? Could they have found something they didn't want Danny to find? Or did Danny already find out and not tell me?
"Danny, what were you hiding", I whispered.
✽ ✽ ✽
After going through Danny's files, coming up empty. I decided to have a drink, then go to bed. It had to be past midnight. Jess was probably in bed, trying to sleep away her embarrassment. She had nothing to be embarrassed about, but knowing her she probably thought she did something wrong. Quite the opposite. She did everything right. I did everything wrong. Bro-code.
After a glass of the best whiskey I owned and a partial cigar, I put out the ash and start to head down to my room. As I pass her room I hear sniffling. She is crying. It cuts a piece out of my heart, hearing such sorrowful cries coming from such a gentle heart.
I tap on the door and she startles, I slowly start cracking the door open. She sits straight up covering herself in modesty. Fuck, she is perfect.
"Jess, can I come in" I asked.
"Y-yes" she stuttered, trying to compose herself. I went and sat on the side of the bed. Keeping some space in between us.
"Is there anything I can do" I begged. Me begging? What is wrong with me? I just hate seeing her is so much pain.
She shakes her head. Trying to stay strong. My fingers instantly go to her soft hair. I stroke tenderly, she leans into my touch and a small moan escapes her lips. The sound goes straight to my cock. Fuck me. I'm so screwed.