MAXEN
I glanced at my face in the bathroom mirror one last time and dried my hands on my jeans, foregoing the dryer. I looked like hell warmed over with bags under my eyes and the unkempt blonde stubble on my face. I had been slaving with Dex, Otis, and Beckett in the studio to put the last touches on our new record and with the impending launch of our band Kinky Shine’s new song, it’s a wonder we’re able to fit in a few hours of sleep. But at least the album was ready now. Fucking finally.
I pushed open the lime green door, matching the shitty signature label’s color and came face to face with Dex who’s leaning against the opposite wall with his phone in hand. Since he started dating Harley, our manager’s daughter, blogger and mass communication genius, he had been engrossed in Twitter like the rest of us, but it’s still funny to see him using social media. My best friend, lead singer and guitarist of our band, wasn’t the most social person out there contrary to me. He’s not deemed “mysterious’’ for no reason. His one-word answers during interviews gave him that reputation. Better that than being called an asshole.
“Fuck, Dex. Stop following me around when I’m going to take a leak.’’ I shook my head and toyed with the barbell in my eyebrow.
He pocketed his phone and shrugged. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.’’
I rolled my eyes and glared at him. “I’m not using, and you know it.’’
He smirked at me and bumped his shoulder into mine. “I know. I just like pissing you off.’’
I reluctantly smiled and chuckled, but it’s nowhere near my usual booming laugh that could be heard blocks away. I had been out of rehab for three weeks now, and it’s been like this ever since. I knew why Dex was basically being my shadow when he wasn’t with his girl, but it’s damn frustrating. He felt guilty for not seeing when I started snorting coke over a year ago, and I ended up in rehab before it went south for me, but it changed something in our band’s dynamics. Before that, they all thought of me as the easy going, always smiling and laughing Maxen. Now, they wondered what I hid behind my smiles and laughs, and it’s all because of me. I couldn’t complain, and honestly, I was a lucky bastard to have such good friends.
“I can’t wait for the song to get out there. I swear Floyd is slowly digging our graves with how much stuff he’s scheduling.’’ I rubbed my face and followed Dex back toward our manager, Floyd’s office, down another hall painted in that ugly ass green I couldn’t stomach. I knew for a fact that Otis thought this color was dangerous for his health, but it was because it reflected the light harshly and our friend, bassist and backup singer, often sported a hangover.
“We’ve been chilling all summer. We have a lot to catch up on after we canceled our summer tour.’’ Dex clasped a hand over my shoulder as a comforting gesture. He knew how I felt about the summer tour. When my secret addiction became not so secret to the band and our manager, they all decided I needed to go to rehab and I did. But it happened to be a couple of weeks before our summer tour through the US. We had told the media and our fans some BS regarding our need for a real break to better focus all of our attention on composing our next album, and by some miracle, it worked. Nothing leaked regarding my drug abuse and my stay at the posh rehab center Dex found for me. But now, we were back in the thick of our job, and it was damn hard to go back to what was my normal life after two months talking about myself and my addiction with doctors and other addicts.
I could safely say that even though getting high could be tempting still, I’d do anything to never, ever go back to rehab. I shuddered at the thought.
“Do you know what Floyd has to tell us still? We’ve been in his office for two fucking hours already going through our made up answers for the past summer. I’m dying to go back home and be lazy for at least one damn hour. That’s all I want, one fucking hour to sprawl on my couch.’’ I groaned loudly at the thought of chilling in front of my TV and looked away from the young woman walking past us with her hands full of files.
I didn’t need to check her out too long to know she’s fuckable, but it’s not the time for that shit. I was trying to avoid what they’ve told me in rehab; distracting myself and getting high on sex instead of drugs. Because what they said in gossip rags about me was true. I fucked left and right any and all women I found attractive. But it’s nothing new. I had always enjoyed fucking my way through my issues. When you knew how to do it right, it’s damn pleasurable and fun. Really, really fun.
I shook my head and resisted the urge to slap myself at the turn my thoughts were going.
I had been abstinent for almost three months, which was the longest for me since I had lost my virginity on my fifteenth birthday. Jerking off was nowhere near as good as a hot and wet pussy. I still wondered how Dex did it for all these years without sex, but now that he had Harley I knew the fucker spent most of his time naked at his house with her. That’s why I made sure to call before stopping by because he’d deck me if I ever caught a glimpse of his girl’s body.
“Nah, I don’t know. Maybe it’s for another chari—’’ he stopped as he opened the office door wider without knocking and blinked.
I frowned at the look of surprise on his face and turned to glance inside.
I felt my mouth open, but not a sound came out. My body burnt up in a blink of an eye. I couldn’t remember the last time my skin had tingled like it did now.
“Lark?’’ My voice finally came out in a croak that didn’t sound like me at all.
In the chair in front of Floyd’s desk was the one woman that had never shown me any interest, who had bitched at me on a daily basis for years had never quite left my fucking mind. I had never kissed her or touched her.
I would recognize her anywhere, even years later. She still had thick honey-colored hair waving down her back, but she didn’t have it tied like she used to. Her hair was flowing free. She’s wearing some makeup now, just a smidgen of that stuff on her eyelids that made her blue eyes even more impossible to look away from. Her lips, parted and full, had the same shine they used to, probably from the same balm she used to always put on her mouth. That balm smelled like cherry and made me wild to taste and see if her lush lips were as good as they looked. And her body…fuck, her body had always been made for sex with her perfect curves and hourglass figure, but now she really looked like a woman who embraced those curves in her mid-thigh dark blue dress hugging her round breasts.
We had hated each other in college, weren’t friends and tolerated each other for our group of friends’ sake, but I had always wanted her. I had a soft spot for her underneath it all, and she had always driven me up the fucking walls. Never in a million years, I thought I’d see her again after I dropped out of college a few days after our crazy trip to Vegas.
And Lark Hardin was my fucking wife.
“Wow, Lark. It’s been a while,’’ Dex said after a beat and walked to her. She stood up, and I had to look away from her round hips hugged by her dress as she’s enveloped in my best friend’s embrace.
My eyes landed on Otis and Beckett, both grinning like fools at seeing one of our oldest friends after years without a word from her. They were both sitting on the couch, and one glance around told me Floyd had left his office to give us some privacy.
What was she doing here? Why after all this time? I heard from her cousin that she lived in Manhattan and worked for a big company there. And she moved in with a boyfriend a little over a year ago. The thought of a guy with her made me close my hands into fists and clench my teeth.
Dex released her and smiled the rare smile he usually reserved for the band, Floyd, and his girl.
“You seem bigger, Dex. And I heard that you’re now with someone. Shit, I never thought I’d see you with a girl.’’ Her voice was light and cheery, and it tugged at my heartstrings. That tone had never been for me. I had always been privy to her ice-cold voice that, while biting, was also strangely stimulating for all kinds of fucked up reasons.
“Yeah, I know. It’s been crazy,’’ Dex said and stepped back to turn toward me.
She followed his eyes and faced me with pursed lips and that same disapproving look in her blue eyes I had always known. I swallowed thickly and ran a hand through my blonde hair that was getting too fucking long. I looked like the same fucker as I used to. I was still wearing frayed jeans, a t-shirt, and unlaced beaten biker boots. Not much about me had changed other than the few pounds of muscles I put on top of what I already had back in New York, a few tats I’d added over the last few years and my hair a bit longer than I was used to wearing.
“Wha—’’ I shook my head and cleared my throat when my voice came out a bit shaky. “What are you doing here? Is Alan okay?’’
She shrugged and looked at the guys with something I didn’t think I had ever seen on her pretty face; embarrassment. I crossed my arms and waited.
“Uh…I need to talk to you about…Las Vegas.’’
My arms fell back along my body and all the blood rushed from my face. I wasn’t expecting it would be the reason for her visit and she didn’t need to tell me why she wanted to have that talk. It was obvious.
She was getting married.
I glanced back at Dex who was now frowning at Lark.
“Vegas,’’ I repeated and nodded stiffly. I rubbed the back of my neck and looked over my shoulder to make sure nobody was lurking around to listen to this. I didn’t want my marital status to get out of here, and a talk about Vegas between a woman and a man was easy to put two and two together. “If you don’t want that to get printed, we should head out.’’
“He’s right,’’ Beckett agreed and stood up, followed by Otis. “Be careful,’’ Beckett said, and I knew it’s more for my benefit than for Lark’s. He leaned into her and hugged her quickly. “Let us know when you leave LA. We should grab a bite or something.’’
She nodded and then went to Otis to give him a hug too. “That would be fun.’’
Dex patted her shoulder and then mine on his way out, not saying anything else, but I saw in his dark eyes that he was worried. That’s the problem when you have a best friend who knew you so well. He knew that the reason why I started snorting wasn’t just about my fucked up past, but also because I heard the news about Lark moving in with her boyfriend after a year of a relationship. It pushed me over the already dangerous edge I was treading on. And that was irrational. Even I couldn’t explain what it was about her or why I reacted like that. I never understood what it was between us.
“Follow me.’’
I turned around and started walking quickly, entering the thankfully empty elevator and pressed the down button. There wasn’t a sound other than the ones made by the elevator. My temperature rose so fucking high it’s a wonder I wasn’t sweating. Shit, alone with Lark in an elevator was the beginning of more than one of my fantasies. I rubbed my forehead. I was a fucking mess, and I couldn’t make out what I felt at that moment. That was never good.
“Where are we going?’’ she asked me quietly as we stepped out and walked into the parking lot. We had been alone for a few minutes, and it’s the first time she opened her mouth. I expected a biting remark or a smart-ass opinion thrown my way, but not this subdued version of the woman I remembered as fiery.
“My place.’’ My voice was harsher than intended, but knowing she wanted to talk about our marriage so her boyfriend could propose had me ready to punch something or someone and I sure didn’t want to smile right now, not even when we crossed paths with the redhead intern who had been flirting with me shamelessly every time I would see her at the label office. I barely spared her a look. “And before you argue, I don’t think what we need to talk about should be done in public. I have to…’’ I trailed off and shook my head as I pressed the unlock button on my car key.
“You have to be careful. Mr. Floyd told me when he met me at the front desk. I suppose he knows that we’re…’’ She made a cute move with her hand right as she got to the passenger door and opened it before I could. I scowled down at her, and the pain in the ass smiled at me as if she didn’t know I was trying to be a ‘gentleman.’ That’s the Lark I remembered.
I watched her climb in and bit my tongue when I wanted to growl at seeing the fabric of her dress stretching over her round ass. I took a deep breath and tried to gather my wits.
Lark was here in LA, and I was about to drive her to my place. That could be the perfect start of a wet dream, only I knew we’re about to talk about something unpleasant, and that’s not how my wet dreams featuring her had ever been going.
I climbed into the car and made quick work of driving away from the label and into the thick LA traffic toward my house. “I can’t believe you’re here,’’ I mumbled after a while, unable to stay quiet and keep on breathing her perfume, the same one she used to wear back in college. I twitched in my pants and glowered at the cars in front of us, bumper to bumper.
“It feels strange for me, too.’’ Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her fidgeting in her seat. “Alan wouldn’t give me your number. He thinks we should have a face to face chat.’’
It shouldn’t, but knowing she’s here against her will made me grip the steering wheel tighter as another pang hit my heart. As if it’s anything new. She had never wanted to be anywhere with me. “He’s not wrong. We’ve never talked about it.’’
“You left soon after.’’
“And you hid from all of us for days, Lark. Don’t put all the blame on me.’’ I sighed and made a turn, trying to find a quicker road to my place.
“I’m not.’’ She turned down the radio without asking, and I found comfort in seeing her being as assertive as she used to. “I didn’t want to face our stupidity for a long time, but I think it’s time we do.’’
I snorted without humor. I floored the accelerator as soon as I saw the empty road open in front of us. I was driving too fast, but it felt good to let out some of the nervous energy I felt.
“Why don’t you just say you’re getting married and that’s why you’re here? Let’s not pretend you’d have faced me otherwise.’’
Her silence was answer enough. And my guts twisted in my damn stomach. I drove even faster.