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The Dancer by Jordan Silver (13)

Chapter 13

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It took me a couple of tries to calm down, to get the image of her in bed with someone else out of my head. She’s right, it never once entered my mind that she might have some other man here.

That some other dick had gotten there before me. Hell no, I won’t accept that shit. I haven’t done anything in life that fucked up to warrant such a thing happening to me.

Jealousy was something else new she’d brought me. I’ve never felt it before and didn’t like feeling it now. “Is there someone?” She didn’t answer and I shook her slightly.

“No, okay, there’s no one here, now get off me.”

“Do me a favor, don’t ever use that line on me again. You might not be able to bear the consequences.”

I tilted her head back with the hand I had around her neck and eased my hold on her throat as I studied her eyes. How had I missed it before?

Was the same thing showing in my eyes?

Could she see into me the way I did her? Were my feelings as open, bare as hers were? I watched her eyes change until the defiant fire was replaced by another kind of heat. That’s more like it.

Her lips fell open slightly as if awaiting my kiss and I could already imagine the feel of her soft mouth under my much hungrier one. My heart thundered in my chest and I had a sense of falling.

There was a mixture of want and fear in her eyes as I pulled her towards me. My heart squeezed when I lowered my head and kissed her, hesitantly at first. I expected her to pull away, to fight me. She bit me.

“Ouch!” I pulled back and wiped the speck of blood from my lip as I stared down at her in amazement. There’s that fire I expected, craved. I smiled and watched her eyes widen as her pupils dilated.

She braced as if expecting me to retaliate, but instead I pulled her in even closer and covered her lips with mine again. I went in deeper this time, but held her cheeks in such a way that she couldn’t hurt me or herself.

She pushed against my shoulders, but I held on, forcing her lips to accept mine. I ignored her futile attempts to escape me because I knew now that they weren’t real, that she was putting up a front.

Just to test her, I released her lips and just nibbled along the corners, giving her ample time to move if she really wanted to. I was hoping she didn’t fight me, because that one little taste was nowhere near enough to satisfy me.

My heart raced sickeningly in my chest as I waited for the rejection that never came. She was still too tense for my liking, but I guess it was going to take time for her to relax enough to accept me the way I needed her to.

I was going on my own instinct here and the belief that what I read in her eyes was interest. What the fuck do I know about this lovey-dovey shit?

“Open for me!” I ran my tongue along her lip teasingly until she gave in just a little. I could feel the battle raging on inside her and exerted just enough pressure to get her to open her mouth to accept my tongue.

I half expected her to bite me again, or push at me like she’d done before, but instead my fiery girl went all soft. I was so surprised by the move that I kept my lips still on hers for a few seconds before diving in.

Her lips became pliant under the forcefulness of mine and she stood still and let me take her over. I closed my eyes and took her all in. The feel of her soft lips, the scent of her skin from her bath.

It was her that I’d been smelling when I first walked into the room. A sweet flowery scent that played havoc with my senses. The scent was soft and sweet, like her, and only worked to make my hunger grow.

I released her throat and wrapped my arms around her, drawing her in until our bodies met. I had to lift her with an arm beneath her ass so that she was just where I wanted her.

She was lucky as fuck that I still had some semblance of control left, or my dick would’ve showed his ass for sure. But I knew without being told that if I tried to fuck her now she’d hurt my ass.

I was practically lifting her now, her feet no longer touching the floor, but it was like holding a feather. Something else that was new.

“You’re so tiny.” I nibbled her lips as I grabbed her hair in my fist, sucking her tongue back into my mouth again before she came to her senses. She felt frail in my arms, like I could break her if I wasn’t careful.

It only made my heart want her more, adding to those confusing feelings I’ve had growing inside me for her. I wanted even more to protect, cherish…love?

I deepened the kiss, already lost in her and so it took me a minute to realize she was fighting to breathe. I put her back on her feet reluctantly, but didn’t let her go.

Her eyes were dazed and out of focus for the first few seconds before they cleared. But once they did she wiped a hand across her lips and fumed up at me, but it was too late. I’d already felt and seen her surrender to me.

I grinned at her, which only seemed to incite her farther and she pulled her foot back and kicked me. “The fuck!” I rubbed my shin as she took that chance to escape me and walk back towards the door.

“You got what you came for, now please leave!” She held the door open for me, releasing the robe and giving me a perfect view of her body beneath it.

“Get away from that damn door.” I walked over and slammed it shut again and stood towering over her. She caught me staring down at her legs and tits and pulled the robe closed.

I smirked and ran a finger down between her cleavage. “Tony told me what a hard time you gave him about getting into the car.” Goosebumps appeared on her flesh and my nostrils flared at the sight of her hard nipples.

I gave her a look to let her know I wasn’t pleased with her earlier actions. A look she completely ignored as she looked off to the side and not at me.

I leaned in close and sniffed her before running my nose along the soft flesh of her neck until my lips reached her ear. She held still, her little body tensing up. I could feel the slight tremble in her and was amazed that something so simple could bring me such joy.

“So he followed you instead.” I continued as I ran my finger along her warm flesh. She swatted at my hand, but I caught her fingers with mine.

“You made him go all over the fucking city while you tried to lose him. Fucker hasn’t been on the subway in a while; he was shook. Next time I tell you to do something do it.”

“I don’t answer to you. I can do whatever I want.”

“You think so?” She breathed in heavily at the look I gave her, but refused to stand down.

I didn’t know if I wanted to fuck her or spank her ass in that moment, maybe both. Why is she able to twist me up like this? Why am I so fascinated by her and the way she tries so hard to keep me out?

Was that it? Was it because she was the only one to ever resist me that I felt this wild need to conquer her? Would I walk away from her like I’ve done so many others after I’ve had her?

Somehow I no longer thought so. Everything felt different this time, but different in a way I didn’t expect. There was lust, and attraction sure, but they weren’t the front runners.

There was something softer, much gentler, growing inside me for her. Something I had no words for and no other experience to compare it to.

It was almost sweet, this feeling and I never do sweet. Sweet is for suckers who get drawn into spider’s webs. Men who wake up one day with regret.

I’ve avoided traps ever since my college days when it looked like my career was going somewhere. It was one of my biggest fears other than being like my father. Falling for the wrong woman and regretting it for the rest of my life.

I’d seen my own mother suffer because of a love that turned out to be all bullshit and lies. So I’ve been wary all this time of history repeating itself.

I never let my heart get involved in any of the relationships I’ve had. And up until now I thought I was in control of that shit.

I didn’t know that someone could sneak in under my well placed guard so easily. Or make me change who the fuck I am that easily. I looked down at her almost in wonder as my mind relived our short acquaintance.

And the debate was back on. I didn’t see me wining and dining her and having one of those long drawn out things. I saw her in my apartment, sitting across the breakfast table from me every morning. In my bed; as simple as that.

Shouldn’t there have been more fanfare? Shouldn’t I have felt some kind of warning? Anything when a man’s life was about to be turned on its ass? Instead she hit me out of the left field and I’m nowhere near prepared.

Her little eyes peered up at me and once again something in them pulled at the core of me and everything in me softened. I pulled her into me and kissed her forehead gently before pulling back.

I looked at her now, trying to see what there was about her that captivated me so. I’ve been around beautiful women all my life, but none had ever twisted me up like this.

As someone with my own good looks and charm, there was no shortage of hot babes in my sphere since my teenage years.

Though I’ve lusted and had a strong liking for some of the females in my past, none of them had ever made me feel half of what she does.

Could it really be this easy? Could something that was supposed to last a lifetime really just happen like this? No warning, no build up?

Or was I making too much of this? And how the hell will I know? What if all this is, is the need for a change, for something new and different?

The fact that I knew I would hate myself if I hurt her told me that that might not be the case. That for the first time I was really and truly thinking of forever with someone.

But hadn’t mom believed the same thing? Doesn’t everyone who embarks on one of these scary ass things? The shit isn’t supposed to be this complicated is it?

Only time would tell I guess. In the meantime what the hell am I supposed to do with these confusing feelings and the slight madness I feel when she’s out of my sight?

“Look at me.” There was something soft mixed with the defiance that was usually in her eyes when looking at me. Something I know she didn’t want me to see. I studied her eyes as I rubbed my thumb gently along her cheek.

I’m not exactly sure why I came here tonight. I told myself it was to make sure she was okay, nothing more. But now I’m not so sure.

Maybe this is what I’d been after, after all. But I had more questions now than I did before I came up those stairs. Like why the fuck I didn’t want to leave her.

It was more than that. I was already missing her and I hadn’t walked out the door yet. Could already feel the emptiness that had plagued me in Miami.

I cupped her cheek and ran my thumb over her lip while holding her eyes with mine. “Open!” She obeyed me without hesitation as if under a spell. I know the feeling.

I teased her tongue with the tip of my thumb before lowering my head for one last kiss. I gave her enough time to refuse, but she stood still and let me in, lifting her head just a little bit more to accept me.

This kiss was softer, sweeter, deeper, because I now knew what to expect. The quick rush of heat in my blood, the lightness in my head and the fast paced beating of my heart.

I took it all in, putting it away for later when I was alone. When I could take it out and look at it again and try to figure out what all of this really meant, if anything.

I kissed her until she was no longer stiff in my arms, and her body melted into mine. Until she returned my kiss reluctantly at first before letting herself give in.

Only when I felt her tremble did I let her go. I didn’t need to say anything as I looked down at her. We both knew that she’d enjoyed my kiss so there was no room for her to deny it; ever.

Funnily enough, although I wanted to jump her, I wanted even more to take my time. I wanted to know everything about her. Who she was, where she came from, what she liked? She made me want.

I may not have known why I followed her here tonight. But I knew I got more than I’d hoped for or expected. She’d returned my kiss, something that pleased me immensely.

I’d crossed that line in the sand, the one I’d drawn for myself. Whatever I did next would decide where this was going. If I would let shit take its course, or turn back before it was too late.