CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Katherine
HE’D SAID THE WORDS—I’m sorry—I’d wanted to hear for so long yet had given up hope I ever would. Donatos didn’t apologize. They were stubborn and stoic, marching to the beat of their own drum. Even if I was stunned by the apology, I had to recognize the ugly truth—my problems weren’t so easily solved. An apology was simply words uttered to create an effect. Luca would say and do anything to get what he wanted, that much I knew.
“How can I trust you’re not saying what you think I need to hear?”
“Trust is a leap of faith. You have to let go of whatever you’re holding on to in order to make that jump.”
I skewed my gaze at him. “Since when did you become such a philosopher?”
“When my fiancée kept doing everything in her power to push me away.”
“Why do you keep calling me your fiancée when I’ve told you repeatedly that I’m not going to marry you?” I asked, exasperated.
He chuckled. “Because I’m an optimist.”
I looked away, refusing to let his charm get to me. There was something stubbornly romantic about the way he refused to take no for an answer. “You’re impossible,” I said, shaking my head. “What am I going to do with you?”
“Marry me.”
His simple answer took my breath away, and tears started fresh.
Luca slipped his hand into mine. His gentle touch was tender, speaking of genuine concern, but I questioned if any of it was real. Nothing felt right in my head right now. When I’d bailed on New York, I’d known in my heart I was making the right decision. Now? I was turned around and upside down, and it was all because Luca wasn’t performing to the script.
It was as if we’d just stepped into a time warp and he was once again the Luca I’d fallen in love with—kind, funny, considerate, sexy...well, that part had never changed—and I was falling all over again, faster than I could stop myself.
Instead of confidence, fear was my traveling companion. Fear of myself, of what I’d been denying since Luca had broken my heart, of losing myself in the Donato vortex, fear of being exactly the kind of person I’d been disdaining since I’d discovered that ugly mag with my boyfriend’s picture on the cover with that sloppy-drunk starlet.
To be honest, the whole situation at the shelter had thrown me for a loop. The person I thought I was might not be real at all. Sister Bernice had summed me up in a glance simply by looking at my hands. It pinched to be judged so quickly, but there was a level of truth to her conclusion, and that killed me inside.
“I don’t like your father, and your mother is iffy,” I said abruptly, readying myself for a fight, but Luca just nodded. My sails deflated.
“Sometimes my family is hard to like,” he said with a shrug.
Couldn’t argue with that.
“Your father scares me.”
“I will never allow anyone to hurt you,” Luca promised.
“What if you can’t prevent it?”
His low growl surprised me. “I will break anyone who tries.”
There was something real and deeply rooted behind his gaze, something I’d never seen before. Was it possible Luca truly loved me? My heart skipped a beat at the thought. I desperately wanted Luca to love me, really love me, not because I was his arranged bride, but because he’d chosen me above all else.
“How can you know that what you feel is genuine, that it won’t fade?” I asked.
“You’re the only one questioning their feelings. I’ve always known how I felt about you. I always knew you were the only one for me. I just had to be ready to go all in.”
My eyes burned with unshed tears as my heart ached with the need to hear exactly that, but my brain was determined to question everything that came out of his mouth and I was breaking from the strain. “I can’t think anymore,” I cried, losing it. “I just can’t. Luca, I—”
“Shh,” he crooned, drawing me into his arms. “Then don’t think. Just let me do the thinking for now. We’re on our way to wine country, where we are going to enjoy being tourists, okay? I want you to think of nothing more than which wine you want to sample next. No more picking at problems bigger than whatever the moment can provide.”
It sounded so tempting—turn off the brain and just enjoy the day with the man I was impossibly crazy about—but could I actually do it? God, I wanted to enjoy this day with Luca. I wanted to hold his hand and walk through the vineyards, eat good food and laugh at silly jokes.
So do it.
The voice I’d been trying to ignore was louder than my fears this time.
I wiped at my tears, nodding slowly. “Okay,” I said, swallowing the lump in my throat. “I can do that. I think.”
Luca smiled and kissed me again.
Everything felt right when his lips were on mine. Was it possible to say screw the world and just chase my happiness?
Could I convince Luca that a life with me was better than a life slaved to his family? Was I really going to ask Luca to choose between me and the Donato empire?
Two seconds into my attempt to stop thinking, I was already breaking the rules. I exhaled a long breath and drew a halting one. “I’m ready to be a tourist,” I told Luca, earning a grin from his sexy lips. “And just be with you.”
“Good,” he murmured, sealing his lips to mine.
Yes, today...I was Luca’s.
Tomorrow? I wasn’t going to think about that.