Sarah paced up and down the library floor, her heart so filled with pain and confusion that she could do nothing other than walk. It had been two days since Mrs. Avis—or Lady Andrew Fairley, since they suspected that was her true title—had gone missing. Thorndyke had not allowed her to return home, insisting that she remain in his home and promising that no one would know of her presence here. The staff, he assured her, were under no illusion—any gossiping about her would result in the termination of their employment with him, which secured their silence. This brought Sarah a modicum of relief.

They had not formed a plan as yet, although Lord Higgs had gone out to learn whatever he could about Lord Andrew. Once they discovered his whereabouts, he intended to return to them all so that they might come up with a plan.

What that plan was, Sarah had very little idea.

“Sarah?”

The library door opened, and Thorndyke stepped inside, leaving the door ajar. He was dressed in his shirt sleeves, with no cravat at his neck or jacket on his shoulders, his hair a little messy, as though he had run his hands through it a few times. She had not seen him since dinner time this evening, where they had been joined by Lord Higgs, who had not said all that much, promising to return tomorrow with more news.

“You cannot sleep?”

She shook her head, not sure what it was she was feeling as he came closer to her. She was struggling with what they had done in the alley, not because she now regretted kissing him, but that their actions meant they had not looked for Mrs. Avis; they had not even realized that she was gone.

“Can I have the staff bring you something to drink?”

“They will all be abed by now,” Sarah replied, shaking her head. “I do not want to disturb them. My sleeplessness should not affect them.”

He smiled at her then gently. “Come with me to the kitchen. I am sure we can make you something to drink that will help. Perhaps cocoa?”

The kindness in his expression made her heart lift a little from the despair that it was wrapped in. “Thank you, Thorndyke.”

To her surprise, he offered her his hand instead of his arm, and after only a momentary hesitation, she took it. It was warm in her own, sending a wave of heat all through her, whilst bringing a certain degree of peace to her soul. They walked together in silence; the way lit only by the candle held in Thorndyke’s hand.

“We will find her—somehow,” Thorndyke said, as he lit a few more candles in the kitchen, letting her hand go so that she could sit down at the roughhewn table. “I know you are upset and confused, but Lord Higgs plans to call in the morning with whatever information he has managed to find. Apparently, his steward has been doing a great deal of work and will report to him tomorrow.”

She gave him a quick smile, which did nothing to ease her inner torment. “That is good to know.” Lord Higgs had not shared this with her at dinner, probably not wanting to distress her any further.

She watched him as he set about warming milk in a pan, a little surprised at his ability to do so. Sarah had always believed that gentlemen did very little for themselves, since Mr. Stanton had never once done anything more than was expected of him. She was not even sure that Mrs. Stanton, for all of her ladylike ways, could even make a pot of tea on her own.

“You look surprised,” Thorndyke commented, glancing back at her. “No one has ever made you cocoa before?”

Seeing the twinkle in his eyes, Sarah felt her tight nerves begin to slowly loosen, a shy smile on her face. “Of course, but it was always the maid, or I made it for myself.”

“Then, I am glad to be of service to you,” he replied, pouring it carefully into a mug and handing it to her. “No standing on ceremony, I am afraid.”

She took the cup carefully and set it on the table, waiting until he had sat down opposite her before taking a sip.

Thorndyke looked at her with one eyebrow raised. “Any good?”

Smiling, she nodded, feeling her mind free itself of its dark thoughts. “Very good. Thank you.”

“My pleasure.”

They sat there quietly for some time, just looking at one another as they grew quiet with their own thoughts.

“Should we manage to bring this to a close, you will have a choice before you, Sarah,” Thorndyke began, after a few minutes. “I would not have you unaware that our continued engagement is entirely in your hands.”

She frowned, tension suddenly coiling in her belly.

“If, somehow, we manage to bring the danger of Lord Andrew to a close, then you will be free to do whatever you please,” he continued, not managing to look at her. “I will not insist on our wedding if you would prefer to choose for yourself.”

That was something she had never considered before, and to her surprise, Sarah found the prospect less than ideal.

“This is all based on the premise that everything works out with Lord Andrew,” Thorndyke continued quickly. “If he is still a threat to you when we manage to retrieve Mrs. Avis, then I will insist on our marriage, but if somehow he is no longer a danger to you, then you will be free to go about your life as you please.” His eyes finally made their way to hers, looking at her carefully. “I will be a part of your life if you wish it, Sarah, but I will respect your choice if you do not.”

Drawing a deep breath, Sarah let it out slowly, steadying herself. “Might I ask if you find the prospect of our matrimony to be a pleasant one?” she asked quietly, suddenly afraid of the answer. “Or is it something that you would be glad to be free of?”

To her surprise, he grasped her fingers with such a ferocity that she jumped.

“No, I would not be glad to be free of it,” he said fervently. “I just do not wish my own feelings to affect your decision.”

She smiled at him then, relief flooding her. “I am glad to hear it. I do not think that I should find another gentleman of your caliber, even if I were to search all of England.”

Thorndyke looked away, seemingly embarrassed.

“You are a kind, compassionate, honest, and dedicated man,” Sarah continued, putting her other hand atop their joined ones. “You have shown me care and consideration from the very moment we met, even though I cannot believe that the prospect of marrying a stranger was ever something you looked forward to.”

He chuckled, looking back at her. “That was not the case until I met you, my dear.”

The tenderness in his eyes warmed her heart, and she smiled back at him, her eyes gentle. “I do want to marry you. I will not pretend that I feel nothing for you, that the feelings in my heart have not continued to deepen over these last days. I feel as though there is so much more for us to share, so much more for us to discover about one another.” Her smile grew soft, as he ran his fingers over the back of her hand. “I want to marry you, Thorndyke, no matter what happens.”

A long breath escaped him, as though he were awash with relief.

“You are glad, I hope?”

He did not say anything but got out of his chair and came around to her, pulling her gently to her feet. When she looked up into his eyes, she saw the deep intensity there in his gaze and the fire burning within.

His lips met hers, and Sarah gave herself up to the emotions that began to fly through her, pushing away the confusion and the grief for a few moments. She held onto Thorndyke tightly, her fingers twining into his hair.

“Sarah,” he murmured, his forehead resting gently against her own. “I have been drawn to you as a butterfly is drawn to the flower. You are sweet and kind, showing such courage and such tenacity even when you are besieged with what has occurred. To go through such a struggle as you have brings me only admiration for you.”

His kind words were a balm to her troubled heart, and she closed her eyes, feeling as though this was precisely where she belonged, where she was meant to be.

“I do not want to ever be separated from you again,” he continued, his hands tightening around her waist. “My own affections are already burrowing into my heart, and I cannot—and will not—deny them.”

“Then we are agreed,” Sarah replied softly. “We will marry, whatever happens.”

“Whatever happens,” he agreed, before gently kissing her again.